“What the hell was that thing doing? Not like any crazy ass bird I have ever seen, maybe an eagle?” I didn't even know if he was talking to me or himself but he said “Goodnight” and went back to his car still muttering.
It was the one time I was happy the bird had appeared and also it confirmed that it wasn’t just my imagination. It had been real all this time. I couldn't be happier at this moment. Nothing like confirming ones sanity to lift a girl’s spirits!
Libby was trying to act casual when I got in, sat on the couch watching TV. Well if she wanted to put on a convincing show then she shouldn't have put the TV channel to Football highlights. She hated most sports. I pulled her up on the bluff.
“Who's winning?” I said trying to hide my smile.
“What, oh umm... Liverpool.” I very much doubted that, seeing as she was watching American football game.
“Umm strange that...I didn't know Liverpool were playing the Bronco's this week, that should be an interesting game.” I laughed as I watched her realise her mistake.
“Ok, so I wasn't watching the stupid TV.”
“No really? I would never have guessed but you were watching something.” I was making my way to the kitchen when she followed me.
“There's some pasta still left in the fridge.” I opened it up to reveal a car crash of a meal left in a bowl. I couldn't understand how you could burn pasta? I would have to think of something quick to cook tomorrow before work.
“It's ok, I just fancy some toast.” I put two slices of bread in the toaster and filled up the kettle. “You want one?” She nodded in response and I grabbed two mugs out of the cupboard.
“So, he seemed nice, was that Jack?” I knew it wouldn't take long so I sat down and joined her.
“Yes that was Jack and we’re just friends.” I knew she just wanted me to be happy, like she was with Frank. In her way she thought that if I could just meet someone nice then everything would work out.
“Oh... do your friends always kiss you?” I knew it! She’d been spying on me.
“Libby! What were you...” she cut me off.
“Toast” she pointed towards the smoke coming from the bread inside and I reacted with waving a tea towel about trying to get rid of the smoke. I removed the charred bread and changed the setting down from five to two. No wonder it had burnt.
“See, I'm not the only one who burns things,” she said in a smug tone.
“Well maybe if it wasn't on the highest setting then I would get toast instead of charcoal, and anyway don't change the subject, why were you spying on me?” I put the black squares in the bin and decided to give up on the toast idea and just settle for the tea. I poured the boiling water into the two mugs and let the teabags stew.
“I wasn't spying, jeez you’re so dramatic. I was just checking to see who it was and I saw him about to kiss you so I stopped. But man he's cute and tall, didn't think you went for blondes though? I always thought it was tall dark and handsome you liked?” I passed her tea and sat down giving her one of those looks.
“Libby, it's not like that, he's a friend.”
“Does he know that?” Ok, so she had me there but I really didn't want to talk about it so I changed the subject.
“Anyway, how's that new client going?” I knew this would work, she loved to talk about her job and when she got going it was as if she had entered a different world.
Libby chatted until Frank walked in and then I made my excuses and went upstairs to my room. It was finally nice to be alone. There were so many answers I needed to a never-ending stream of questions that I felt mentally exhausted. I started going through everything that had happened and it just made me more frustrated. I got ready for bed hoping that I would dream of him. I just wanted the image of him to comfort me. The Draven I knew, my own personal Draven who was everything I needed.
“NO!” I shouted at myself. It was getting out of hand and I needed to stop it all! I knew what Draven was and he was out of my reach. It was pointless to dream of something that wasn't real. I went back into the bathroom and filled a glass and grabbed my sleeping pills off the shelf. This was one night that I needed to myself.
Back in the club the band played but it was surprisingly empty for this time of night. Jerry came over to me with a tray in his hand looking flushed and his brother followed behind. It was the first time I had seen them both together but it was only Jerry that spoke.
“You're needed upstairs again but you need to be quick.” He handed me the tray but I shook my head at him.
“No, I turned down the job. I'm not working up there and you can't make me.” I finally said it and it felt good, unfortunately it was short lived.
“No but Draven can! So hurry up” This did scare me. I didn't want Draven to speak to me again, so I gave in. I took the tray and headed for the back staircase when Gary spoke in that creepy voice of his.
“Be careful not to bleed.” What the hell?!!! Why did he say that? I turned to demand what he meant but neither of them were there. What was with that dude? Did they teach “Creepy” at his school or was he just born weird. I mean I know that Mike had called him ‘Special’ but come on.
I went to the doors that led to the staircase I had used last time but something was different, there wasn't the usual muscle standing guard. I pushed the doors open and walked up the steps shivering with the cold. It was strange without the hum of people busy enjoying themselves down in the club. It made it more eerie.
The door at the top was open, unlike last time, and I walked through after a moment of hesitation. Once I was inside the door slammed shut sealing me in along with my fate. I tried opening it but it seemed stuck or worse... locked. I turned to the room, which was the same as I left it the night before. There were the same groups all sat at exactly the same tables and I walked the same steps I had done the night before. Thinking of the one friendly face I could find I walked towards the bar in hopes of seeing Karmun.
I was getting close to the centre table and my hands started to shake. I really wished there was a different way to the bar but it had been cleverly positioned. I took a deep breath letting my lungs fill with air so that I didn't have to breathe while I walked past. I wasn't sure why I did this but I was almost convinced that the very scent of him had me feeling strange things. I wouldn't look. I wasn't going to look. I promised myself not to look.
I looked.
Of course I did, I was weak. However he didn't look back. I tried to move my eyes but they wouldn't listen to my silent pleas. He wasn't wearing a full suit tonight. He wore a tight fitted t-shirt instead of a shirt and tie, but just kept on the jacket. My god he looked sexy. I started to mentally undress him and stopped before it got too much to handle.
I found myself thinking what his skin looked like in the glow of candlelight. More than ever I wanted to touch it. Would it be soft or hard under his powerful muscles? He leaned over to the Goddess next to him and listened to what his sister was whispering to him. Then my cover was blown as his head snapped up too quick for me to react. I almost ran the rest of the way to the bar.
I bumped into people on the way but what I saw in them wasn't the same as last night. My curse, it had come back to haunt me and I screamed. But no one looked at me even when they pushed around me. I dropped the tray and bottles smashed around me in slow motion. Their faces were monstrous! I was terrified and I wanted to run. NO, no, no, this couldn't be happening. Not now....not again!
I began to run but it felt as though my legs were made of metal. I could hear the crunching of glass beneath my feet and the heavy thunder of my own heartbeat. I was looking for the way out of this hell but as I passed each table the horrors kept showing themselves in wave after wave of Demons.
There was one whose skin looked as though it was melting from the bone but it just smiled as though what I was seeing was normal. I gagged at the dripping skin and lipless grin. I ran past another table of men that didn't have faces but teeth. That was all, just teeth that locked together l
ike a prehistoric sabre-toothed tiger. Their lips started from their foreheads and went down to their chins with just deadly teeth but their faces kept twisting and contorting into what I had seen last night, their normal faces.
I couldn't get a grip. I turned around hiding from them only to see more monsters. The table I thought were Vampires were actually a table full of broken skulls that bled through the cracks. They turned to look at me and pointed to me with broken fingers that kept fading into the air like they were made from the ash of cremated corpses.
I grabbed my head and sank to my knees wanting to curl up into a tight ball saying “There's no place like home,” over and over.
I could see from the corner of my eye a figure coming over to me before I made my secure ball. Everything was blurring like when I was a child. I couldn't make out what was real and what was my craziness. The figure was getting closer and every instinct told me to run but I was paralysed with fear. I hung my head and let my hair cover my face and the sobs started to erupt from eyes that couldn't take any more.
“Please make it go away.” I whispered like a frightened child.
“I will little one. Don't worry, you’re safe now.” When a voice answered me I realised that I had asked this out loud. I recognised the soothing velvet and soon I no longer cared about the fear.
“You can open your eyes now, don't be scared.” A hand touched the top of my head before it flowed down to my chin and lifted it slightly. I opened my eyes as he had instructed and saw that I was in my familiar bedroom. I was in my bed and it had all been a dream. That I could cope with. I saw the room just the way I had left it and I started to relax my tense muscles from the ball I was still in but then froze mid-stretch. If this was a dream then why was there a figure stood over me now? I shot up out of bed before I could think and dragged the covers with me nearly tripping over them.
“Whoa, easy there... you’re alright, I won't hurt you.” He walked towards me with his hands up as though I was holding a gun. He looked as he did in the dream, only he wasn't wearing a jacket, just a t-shirt and jeans. I instantly looked down to make sure I had gloves on which he noticed. Thankfully I did.
“I didn't touch you.” He said in a soft tone taking my fears about exposing my scars the wrong way.
“I know you didn't but...but what are you doing here?” I tried to keep my voice steady but it was proving difficult with my heart going so fast it sounded like a jet engine.
“I should go.” That wasn't the answer I was hoping for and said the first thing my mind wanted.
“Please don't!”
“You want me to stay?” He seemed surprised and I wondered if he'd looked in the mirror lately?
“I don't understand, was I dreaming...am I dreaming?” I added in a whisper.
“No and yes, it was more of a nightmare but now, well that's a different matter.” He had slowly been making his way towards me and I shivered with the breeze that flowed through my open window. Is that how he had entered my room? And what was with the cryptic messages?
“So what about now?” I asked as he bent down, not taking his eyes from mine for a second. I could see him smile in the dark when I asked this. I knew what was coming. This was the time that he would leave. It was the same smile I would always get when I didn't want it to end. But what was I saying, there was no way this was a dream, it felt too real. Far too real.
He held something in his hand as he came so close to me now that I had to arch my neck back to see his face. He looked down at me.
“Are you cold?” He raised his free hand to my face and touched my skin with the back of his hand running it down my neck. This had to be real! I closed my eyes as my nerves became taut, hoping his next move was the one I had waited what felt like an eternity for.
He answered his own question.
“Yes you are.” Then with one swift motion my covers were around me like a cloak. He pulled me closer gripping the covers like a collar on a jacket. I could feel him breathing as he got closer still to my face. I, on the other hand, had stopped breathing altogether, afraid that he would leave me as always. I needed to speak. I needed answers even if they were just in my dreams. There were things I simply needed to know.
“Thank you. But please... I need to know.” There was just enough light from the moon for me to see one of his eyebrows rise. I carried on before I lost track of what I was saying.
“Is this real, are you real or am I still asleep?” He gave me what seemed like a sad smile and answered me,
“Yes you are but you won't have another nightmare. Not tonight. I won’t allow it.” His voice sounded stern as if strained through granite teeth like he was trying to protect me.
“But why, I mean...you...” I didn't know how to word it and he picked up on it.
“Why do you keep dreaming of me, you mean?” I nodded half knowing why. I was sick. I was obsessed and my dreams were only some of the symptoms of my sickness.
“I don't know why, but I will tell you one thing...” His hands moved up from the makeshift collar until his fingertips caressed the cool skin along the column of my neck. I couldn't help the deep quiver coming straight from my spine. Then he made it worse and added to the spell he had over me by speaking the words I itched to hear.
“I like it.” He lowered his head so he could see my eyes when he said this and I could feel my skin burn under the hands that still held my neck. He smiled again as though feeling the evidence for himself.
A noise I could only faintly hear in the distance caught his attention and he looked at the window as though something was calling.
“Time’s up little one.” But before he could do his usual disappearing act I stepped away from his hold. He looked shocked as though this wasn't what he was expecting. Well if this was my dream then I was in control, wasn't I? It never felt like it. It pained me to be far from his body but I needed something different to happen. I wasn't ready to let go of this yet. I moved to the corner of my room putting distance between us, which he didn't seem to like causing him to frown.
“Why do you have to go if it's my dream?” I bravely said this with more than my usual tone. But I still retreated, backing into a corner, only looking down for a split second to make sure I wasn't going to do my usual tripping over act.
“That's a good question but unfortunately one I cannot yet answer.” The breath of his words hit me across my lips, as he was once again so close to my face. I couldn't understand it. How had he reached me so quickly? Before I could react his lips had moved and were at my ear whispering the end of the nicest dream I had ever had in my life.
As always his last words lingered in my mind making it impossible not to obey such a commanding voice.
“Good night my Keira and this time…
You will dream…peacefully.”
Chapter 14 – Childhood
As soon as those words had been said I was awake. It was still dark outside my window but it was closed as though it had never been touched. My heart sank instead of the usual rush of pleasure I would normally feel. I tried to piece together the nightmare, which had then erupted into the best dream yet. It had seemed so real I could barely believe it was just a dream. In fact the only reason I still believed they were all just dreams is because any other explanation was impossible. The man despised me that much was clear. To him I was an intruder who didn't belong, not only in his world but most definitely not in his club.
I got up, wrapping a knitted throw around my shoulders, as I was about to do something I hadn't done for a very long time. I walked over to my white washed wooden desk and took out the supplies I needed from one of the drawers. Libby had put a load of art stuff in one drawer in the hope that one day I would start up my passion once again. As it turned out she had been right. I held the pencil in my hand as though I had been a wizard reunited with his wand.
Libby and I had both shown a passion for art since a young age. But Libby then went on to develop a taste for interior design, begging our parents t
o let her decorate their lounge at the age of sixteen. Ever since then she had known what her calling in life had been and she was a master at it. I, on the other hand, had developed mine in very different ways.
You see, I had a secret. The deepest and darkest of secrets. I was different from the rest. I had always known that one day it would catch up with me. Like a personal realm of demons I just couldn't hide from and no matter how much I closed my eyes, they were there...they were always there. Waiting in the shadows of what was left of my mental control. Waiting until the day I finally broke and gave in for the very last time. The scariest thing was, it really didn't feel like that far away.
It started when I was younger, one year when we all went on vacation down to Cornwall to spend the summer with my mother’s parents. My grandparents lived by the sea, which would attract various types of tourists. The summers would be buzzing with people from all walks of life and was a breeding ground for all types of entertainment. Everyone would wait with excitement for the famous travelling circus and fairground to come to town.
This particular year it did and it would be the life changer I would never forget.
My sister and I went skipping through the crowds with giggles and smiles at all the wonders our eyes could see. Fire eaters, acrobats, men that would eat swords and clowns with sad faces squirting each other with water filled flowers. The rides with happy screams of excitement and the smells of sugar treats and hot dogs filled the field, transforming it into a child's blissful playground.
It had been my first time at a fair, well one that I could remember anyway. I was nearly seven so I couldn't go on every ride like Libby but I didn't care, I was just so happy to be there, that I could barely contain my excitement. Libby and my dad had just come off a roller-coaster called the “Inferno Twister” when I started to ask about the candy stand over near the “House of Fun”. My mother had waited with me and bribed me with the chance of candy-floss if I waited like a good girl. Given my love for all things sweet this wasn't a hard task to comply with. But as soon as they came in sight, it was all my mind could think of.