“Did you see your dragon today?” she asked Rapskal. She was settling into the rhythm of paddling again. First, she knew, her muscles would ache. Then they’d ease into the exercise and for a time, all would go smoothly. What she dreaded was when they’d begin to ache again, because no matter how they hurt, they could not stop paddling until they went ashore for the night. A few days of traveling by boat had toughened all of the dragon keepers and taught them the basics of watercraft, but she had a feeling that her body would hurt a lot more before she was completely accustomed to this. She leaned harder into her paddling.
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“ ’Course I did. ” Rapskal timed his words to his efforts. “After I ate, I went and groomed Heeby. Then we did our flying exercises. Then I watched Heeby eat. It made me mad. The big dragons take the best food. She doesn’t get as much to eat as they do. When we stop tonight, I got to catch her a fish or something. But I think that’s going to be a problem. If the dragons go this fast, so we have to paddle all the time to keep up, when are we going to have time to hunt or fish for food for them?”
“There’s supposed to be some food on the barge, for us, and some dried meat for the dragons. We don’t know how long they’ll keep up this pace. Maybe they’ll stop in a few hours and we’ll have time to hunt. ” She shook her head. “There’s a lot we don’t know yet. I guess we’ll learn as we go along. ”
“I saw the hunters get on board the barge back there. They’re supposed to help us get meat for the dragons each day. ”
“I didn’t see them. I’m glad they got here before the dragons decided to leave. But if the hunters are on the barge back there, how are they going to hunt anything?”
“That’s a very good question. What’s that ahead of us?”
She squinted against the sunlight bouncing off the river. “Looks like a big snag sticking out into the water, with a lot of driftwood piled up against it. ”
Rapskal grinned. “We’ll have to go out in the current to get around it. ”
“No. Let’s hug the shore. If we have to, we’ll portage around it. I don’t want to get out in the current. ”
“Are you scared?” Rapskal sounded delighted at the prospect. When she glanced over her shoulder at him, he turned his wide grin on her. When he smiled, all his strangeness seemed to melt away and he became simply a very handsome Rain Wild youth. She still shook her head at his challenge.
“Yes. I am scared,” she replied firmly. “And we are not going out into the current. Not until I’m better at managing this boat. ”
But suddenly, partnering with Rapskal instead of Tats did not seem such a poor trade.
LEFTRIN WAITED UNTIL Alise was aboard the barge before he started up the ladder. He knew he needed to focus his mind on the final loading of the barge and shoving the Tarman back out into the current. No one had expected the dragons to stampede off like that. The plan had been that the barge would lead the way, followed by the keepers in their canoes guiding and encouraging the dragons. Now the dragons were completely out of sight, and the last of the canoes would soon vanish around a bend in the wandering river. And here he sat, on shore still, with cargo of dried meat, hardtack, salt pork, and pickled breadleaf still being loaded. If any of the young keepers overturned their canoes, there would be nothing he could do to help them. And from what he’d seen of the youngsters, mishaps seemed more likely than not.
Well, all he could do right now was worry about them until he had all the stores safely stowed. Then he’d have to get his barge back out into the water and headed upriver. He tried to push Alise out of his thoughts. Now was no time to be wishing that he could sit her down in the galley and offer her a quiet cup of tea and some talk. He’d been so proud of her for standing up to Sedric when he tried to bully her into backing out of her adventure. She’d kept a stone face and a stern resolve all the way back to the barge. He followed her up the ladder, wondering if he’d have time to let her know how impressed he was.
But as he stepped onto his deck, he encountered not only a heap of unstowed cargo but three strangers lounging against it. Alise had frozen where she was, just off the ladder, her back to the barge’s rail. Instinctively he moved between her and the men. He sized up their scattered goods in one glance. Spears and bows, one a heavy bow for distance shooting. A carefully folded net. Several quivers of arrows. Hunters’ gear. These would be the fellows they’d been waiting for, the hunters hired by the Council. One turned toward him, grinning, and only then did he recognize Carson. He’d grown a beard. The big man put out a calloused hand to him, saying, “I’ll bet you’re surprised to see me here! Or maybe I was exactly what you were expecting. This is just the sort of misadventure that always finds us, so it’s no coincidence we’ve both signed on for it. ”
Simple words spoken between old friends, yet they suddenly made Leftrin’s heart sink. He desperately hoped there was no meaning layered beneath that greeting, that his use of the words was a true coincidence. He didn’t want Carson to be the one whom the note had warned him to expect. Not Carson. He forced an answering grin to his face and asked him, “Now why would I be expecting a drunken sot like you on my clean deck?”
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“Because drunk or sober, I’m the best damn hunter this river has ever seen, and I’m exactly what you’re going to need to keep those dragons from eating each other or you before this is all over. This is Davvie here, an up-and-coming bowman who still needs his arse kicked from time to time. He’s my nephew, but don’t let that stop you when it comes to arse-kicking time. And this fellow is Jess, who I only met this morning, but he seems to think he can keep up with me. I’ll soon teach him better. ”
The first was a youngster near fresh faced as a Bingtowner but with the shoulders of a good archer. He bore a strong resemblance to his uncle, with the same unruly brown hair and dark eyes. He shook Leftrin’s hand and met his eyes with an honest grin. If Carson was up to something nefarious, Leftrin would wager that Davvie had no knowledge of it. He still gave the boy a serious look and told him firmly, “You see that Skelly? The deckhand with the long black braid down her back? Well, she may look like a girl but she’s not. She’s my deckhand and my niece. And that means that, to you, she’s not a girl. ”
Davvie looked properly daunted, but Carson just shook his head, a smile twitching the corner of his mouth. “I guarantee you, Leftrin, there will be no problems with Davvie in that department,” he said as the lad ducked his head and blushed.
Jess was an older man with graying hair above gray eyes who scowled at Carson’s deprecating introduction and offered Leftrin only a curt nod. Leftrin instantly disliked him, and he felt a thrill of distrust go through him as well. He didn’t offer the man his hand, and Jess didn’t appear to notice that lack of courtesy.
Carson demanded abruptly, “And aren’t you going to introduce me and explain what a fresh flower like this is doing on your stinking old barge?”
It seemed impossible but he had briefly forgotten that Alise was standing there behind him. He glanced at her, then grinned as he confronted Carson. “Stinking barge? Not until you came on board, Carson. Alise Finbok, I’m afraid I have to introduce you to an old friend of mine. Carson Lupskip. Hunter, braggart, and drunk, not necessarily in that order. Carson, this is Alise. She’s aboard as our expert on dragons and Elderlings, newly arrived from Bingtown and happily willing to advise and educate us on this voyage. ”
He’d thought his words would make her smile. Instead, she ducked her head and abruptly declared in a husky voice, “You must excuse me. I’ve a few things to do before we depart. ” And before he could say another word, she scuttled away to her quarters and slipped inside, shutting the door firmly behind her. He suspected it would be dark and hot in there, but off she’d gone anyway. And even knowing as little of women as he did, he suspected she sought privacy for weeping. Damn him for a fool. He should have known that the confrontation with S
edric would upset her. He was just as glad the man wasn’t going to be accompanying them. She’d get over her doubts a lot faster without him around. He wanted nothing so much as to follow her and reassure her, if she would allow such a thing. But he couldn’t, not with this threesome cluttering up his deck with their gear and themselves. When he turned back to Carson, he found his old friend regarding him knowingly.
“Is she expert on more than dragons?” he asked teasingly.
“I wouldn’t know,” Leftrin snapped back at him. Then, embarrassed, he tried to soften it with, “Welcome aboard, Carson. Maybe tonight we’ll find some time to catch up on old news. For now, please, all three of you find yourselves some space in the deckhouse and stow that stuff where it won’t be underfoot. Swarge! Did the rest of our cargo come on board yet? Because at the rate those dragons were traveling, we’d best be after them. ”
“They won’t keep up that pace for long,” Carson predicted. “By afternoon—”
The hunter stopped speaking abruptly, staring past Leftrin. The captain turned to find Sedric awkwardly climbing over the rail of the barge. He gripped his supply case to his chest with one arm while he struggled. “What do we have here?” Carson asked quietly. A slow smile spread across his face.
“Oh, him. ” Leftrin fought for neutrality in his voice. He spoke to Carson alone, saying, “He goes where Alise does. Supposed to look after her. ”
“That must be inconvenient,” Carson muttered quietly.
“Just shut up,” Leftrin replied with feeling.
Davvie had darted over to the ladder and attempted to help Sedric by taking his case for him. The man scowled at the lad and held tight to it as he clambered awkwardly over the railing. As he straightened up, he brushed at his clothing, and then came directly to the captain, demanding, “Where’s Alise?”
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“She’s gone to her quarters. We launch soon. You’d better round up your gear if you want it to go ashore with you. ” Leftrin kept his voice flat.
The Bingtown man stopped and stared at him. He didn’t quite grind his teeth, but he clenched them for a moment. “I won’t be going ashore,” he grated. He turned away from Leftrin and said meaningfully over his shoulder, “I wouldn’t leave Alise alone on this barge. ”
With you, Leftrin mentally added to his words, and fought to keep from grinning. That slimy little bugger wanted to say he wouldn’t leave Alise alone with me, but he didn’t quite have the spine. Aloud, he said, “She’d scarcely be alone, you know. She’d come to no harm with us. ”
Sedric glanced back at him. “She’s my responsibility,” he said flatly. Then he opened the door of his small cabin and vanished inside it, shutting it nearly as firmly as Alise had done. Leftrin tried to push aside his disappointment.
“Doesn’t bark too loud for a watchdog,” Carson observed slyly. When Leftrin scowled at him, he only grinned wider and added, “I don’t think he has his heart in what he’s guarding. Appears to me he might have other things on his mind. ”
“Get your gear off my deck. I don’t have time for you now. I got a boat to get back in the water. ”
“Indeed you do,” Carson agreed. “Indeed you do. ”
IT WAS STUFFY in the cabin and dim. Alise sat on the floor and stared up at the rough ceiling. Lighting a candle was too much trouble, and climbing into her hammock too much of a challenge. The little room that had earlier felt cozy and boldly quaint now seemed like a child’s treehouse. And she felt like a child, hiding from discipline that must sooner or later descend on her.
Why had she defied Sedric? Where did those bursts of audacious bravery come from, and why did she keep yielding to them when she knew she could not back up her threats? She’d go without him. Oh, of course she would! Off, up the river, on a ship full of sailors and other rough folk, headed no one knew where. And when she came back, what then? Then Leftrin would discover that Hest would not cover the debts she had run up while defying her chaperone, and even if she’d gained any knowledge, she’d be disgraced in Bingtown and Trehaug. She would no longer have any home to go to. She thought of what Hest would probably do to her study and her papers when he discovered she’d run away. He’d destroy them. She knew how spiteful he could be. He’d sell the valuable old scrolls, probably in Chalced. And he’d burn her translations. No, she suddenly thought bitterly. He’d auction them along with the scrolls. No matter how angry Hest might be, he never passed up the opportunity to make a profit.
She clenched her teeth in frustration, and tears stung her eyes. She wondered if he would find out then how valuable her studies and notes were. Or would some collector just acquire her treasures and hide them away in his library, unaware of what he had? Worse, would someone else claim her work as his own? Use what she had painstakingly learned of Elderlings and dragons for his own profit?
The thought was unbearable. She couldn’t let her work come to such an end. She couldn’t ruin her life in such a headstrong, childish way. She had to go home. That was all there was to it.
The thought strangled her, and for a time she gave way to wild weeping. She cried as she had not cried in years, letting the deep sobs rise and choke her as they passed through her. The world rocked with her anguish. When finally the fury passed, she felt as if she’d been the victim of a terrible physical mishap, a hard fall or a beating. Sweat had plastered the hair to her head, and her nose was running. Her head spun with dizziness. In the darkness she rose, her body aching. She groped around until she found one of her shirts in the wardrobe, pulled it out, and wiped her face on it, not caring how she soiled it. What did it matter anymore? What did anything matter? She wiped her face again on a dry spot and then sullenly threw the shirt to the floor. She heaved a great sigh. The tears were gone, used up with as little result as they ever had. It was time to surrender.
There was a timid knock at her door. Her hands flew to her face. Reflexively she patted her cheeks and smoothed her hair. She must not be seen like this. She cleared her throat and attempted to sound sleepy. “Who’s there?”
“It’s Sedric. Alise, may I have a word with you?”
“No. Not now. ” The refusal was out of her mouth before she thought about it. Her deep sadness blazed up and was suddenly heedless fury again. Another wave of vertigo swept over her. She put out a hand and steadied herself on the desk she would never use. For a time, a frozen silence held outside the door. Then Sedric’s voice came again, stiffly correct.
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“Alise, I’m afraid I must insist. I’m opening the door now. ”
“Don’t!” she warned him, but he did, pulling it open to admit a slice of afternoon light into the small room. Instinctively she moved beyond its reach and half turned her face away from it. “What do you want?” she demanded, and in the next breath, “I’m packing my clothing back in my wardrobe,” she lied. “I’ll be ready to leave soon. ”
He was merciless. He pulled the door open wide. She stooped to pick up the blouse from the floor, contriving to turn her back to him. As she did so, she lost her balance and nearly fell. In two steps he was inside the room, catching her arm and holding her up. She clung to him gratefully, both hands on his arm as she looked over his shoulder. “I’m dizzy,” she admitted breathlessly.
“It’s just the movement of the barge on the river,” he said. In the same moment, she realized that the barge was in motion again. Behind him, she saw the stately parade of immense tree trunks as the ship moved upriver. Her vertigo was suddenly the gentle shifting of the floor under her feet. It passed.
“We’re under way,” she said in wonder. She found herself clutching his arm and staring over his shoulder at the passing riverbank. She could not quite believe it. She had defied him, and she had won. The barge was carrying her upriver.
“Yes. We are. ” His response was curt.
“I’m sorry,” she said, and then wondered at her words. She wasn’t sor
ry, not at all, and yet she could not keep herself from apologizing. When had it become so ingrained in her to apologize whenever she wanted something for herself?
“That makes two of us,” Sedric responded. He took a deep breath, and she was suddenly aware of how close she was standing to him. It was almost an embrace. She could smell him, the spicy scent he wore, the soap he used. She was surprised that she recognized those scents. They brought Hest sharply to mind, and she stepped back. She suddenly wondered if the two men used the same perfumed oils. She frowned, thinking about that.
His voice was deep and regretful as he interrupted her thoughts with, “Alise, this is mad. We’ve just embarked on a journey with no fixed destination, into territory that has never been successfully mapped. We’ll be gone for weeks, if not months! How can you do this? How can you just walk away from your entire life?”
A stillness welled up in her and then a joy as dizzying as the gentle rocking of the barge spun her. He was right. She’d left it all behind. After a moment, she found her voice. “Walk away from my life, Sedric? I’d run away from what you think is my life if I could. The hours sitting at my desk, scratching away with a pen, living a life based on things that happened centuries ago. Dining alone. Going to bed alone. ”
Her harshness seemed to shock him. “You don’t have to dine alone,” he said awkwardly.
Her mouth was dry with bitterness. “I suppose I don’t have to go to bed alone, either. Yet, when one weds, one expects one’s husband to be her companion for those things. When Hest asked me to marry him, I foolishly thought that I wouldn’t have to worry about loneliness again. I thought he would be there, with me. ”
“Hest is with you when he can be. ” Sedric sounded uncertain, probably because he knew he was lying. “He’s a Trader, Alise. You know that means he must travel. If he doesn’t travel, he can’t find the special goods that bring in the prices that allow him to provide you with the life you have. ”