The memory of the morning in bed with Libby stayed with Taylor for the rest of the day, and as he sawed into a long plank of wood, he replayed his confession to her. A small part of him had hoped she would wake up—then she would know how he felt.
He knew what was stopping him. If she’d heard him speak those words, he would want to stay. He would want to hide here forever, and Libby and Levi deserved more than that. They deserved someone who didn’t need to hide, because they’d both done enough of that. Fuck, but he loved her.
Life in Sea Pointe was going to be even worse than before. He might be without the drugs, but he was going to be without Libby, too.
“You’re splintering that plank, kid. Go easy.”
Taylor dropped his arm. Josh was right. The plank was useless. He’d been too rough, and now even the slightest drop of rain would warp it. It was screwed. Just like him.
Taylor tossed the handsaw onto the ground and wiped his brow. “I wasn’t concentrating.”
“Could see that from the scowl on your face. Need to talk?”
“Got no fucking clue where to start,” he said, picking up a water bottle. He drank slowly, his eyes focused on his uncle.
“Why don’t we start with Libby?”
Taylor huffed. “You want to know my intentions?”
“Maybe,” he replied with a small smile.
“Don’t want your drug addict, loser nephew shacking up with her?”
Josh winced and shook his head. “Haven’t you lost that chip on your shoulder? Oh wait, I see it and it’s bigger than ever.”
“No idea what you’re talking about. I’m stating facts.”
“Really? I don’t see either a loser or a drug addict in front of me.”
Taylor’s top lip curled. “What is it you see, then? Because I must be looking in the wrong damn mirror.”
Josh placed his hand on Taylor’s shoulder. Taylor tried to shrug it off, but Josh remained firm. “I see someone I’m proud of. Someone who battled the world—battled his own body—to make himself a better person. I see someone who’s won the hearts of my two favorite people just by being himself. And I see someone who’s swallowed his pride to ask for help for the person he cares about.” He tightened his grip. “None of that says loser or drug addict, kid.”
“You still don’t want me with Libby, though, do you?”
Josh pursed his lips. “I don’t recall saying such bullshit. Jesus, Taylor, listen to what I’m saying to you. I’m proud of you, and I have no problem with whatever’s going on between you and Libby, until someone ends up heartbroken.”
Taylor hung his head. “I don’t want that.”
“Then what are you planning to do about it?” He took a deep breath. “Here’s the thing. Every decision I see you making will end in upset. Libby relies on you, whether she admits it or not, and let’s not even talk about Levi and his hero worship.”
“You’re not making this any easier.”
Josh shrugged. “Don’t suppose I am. I didn’t come out here to make you feel bad. I can see the bond you two—you three—have formed, and I’m worried. This place is going to feel empty without you, kid.”
Taylor’s heart thumped a rapid tattoo against his chest, the blood roaring in his ears. “And what if I decided to stay? Would there be room for me here?”
Josh blinked, his mouth hanging open slightly. “And you’re thinking of doing that?”
Taylor dropped the water bottle and kicked it over to the saw. “Hell, I don’t know. I didn’t come here for this.” He groaned and tapped his temple. “In here, right from the start, I had a date. The date I’d be free to leave and go wherever I wanted to. That date is almost here, and I find myself wanting to push it further away. I hate that date, Josh. I fucking hate it.”
“Because of Libby?”
“Maybe. Somewhat. Shit, mostly, yeah.”
“You love her.”
Taylor could only nod.
“Does she know?”
“I haven’t come right out and said it, but . . .”
“I get it. Damn, you’ve gotten yourself into a real mess, huh?”
Taylor gulped, the feelings within him almost suffocating. “What do I do? How can I make sure everyone is happy at the end of all this?”
Josh shrugged, sadness turning his lips downward. “I dunno, kid. But if you’re thinking in terms of an end, then there will be tears. You’ve got a lot of thinking to do.” He patted Taylor on the cheek. “Come and find me when you’ve made your decision.”
Taylor watched his uncle walk back to the house, leaving him alone in the field with only his musings.
He hated every scenario he conjured up, hated himself even more for allowing it all to happen in the first place.
The clock continued to tick, the pain in his chest increasing, and for the first time in weeks, Taylor hungered for the oblivion a line of coke gave him. He walked quickly toward the house and pulled out the card Kyran had given him. He entered the front door and headed straight for the phone. He could feel Josh watching him, but it didn’t matter. If Josh heard him with his own ears, he could stick up for Taylor when it came to any debate with Jacob, so he let his uncle listen.
The phone rang four times before the receptionist answered.
“Good morning, Dr. Milo’s office. How can I help?”
Taylor coughed, nerves getting the better of him. “Um, yeah, hi. My name’s Taylor Reese. My brother spoke to Dr. Milo recently. I’d really like to speak to him.”
“Oh, Mr. Reese. Yes, the doctor left a note for me to transfer you to him. He doesn’t have anyone with him now. Do you have time to talk?”
Taylor exhaled, relief allowing his shoulders to sag. “That would be great.”
Chapter 21
Taylor raced across the grass, panting. His lungs burned but he continued to run, pumping his legs hard. He was almost there.
“Run faster, Mom!” Levi shouted, cheering from his spot on the porch. “Taylor’s catching you.”
Spurred on by the possibility of losing, Taylor attempted to speed up. He could see her red hair flying free of its tie, and she would be within reach if he just stretched.
He stumbled, and Levi squealed in delight as Libby reached the fence—their makeshift finish line. “Fuck,” he cursed, slowing to a jog until he reached the woman who consumed his thoughts. She raised her palm, waiting for him to reciprocate her high five. Instead, he grabbed her waist and lifted her over his shoulder.
“Put me down!” she shouted, slapping his back and receiving one on her ass in return. “Taylor!”
“You have to pay. I never lose, woman!” He turned toward Levi with her still on his shoulder. “Your mom’s in big trouble, brat.”
Levi laughed, his face lighting up with pure joy. “Don’t get her yet. Let me get Pops’ camera!”
He raced off, leaving Libby to wriggle her way free.
“Let me down!” she pleaded, lifting the back of his shirt to slap his bare skin.
“Ouch! You’ll pay for that too, Blue.” He tickled her side, pinning her legs tighter to his chest when she thrashed against him. She grasped the fence, pulling her upper body away from his back. He cursed as she laughed and pulled and eventually toppled them both onto the grass.
The air whooshed from Taylor’s lungs. He barely caught his breath before she pounced, straddling his hips and pinning his arms above his head. God damn, but he let her do it. Being underneath her made him hard as rock and desperate to be inside her.
Blood surged. It pounded in his ears, and when she lowered her head and kissed him with tenderness, he groaned. He didn’t fight to get his arms free; he didn’t want to. If she wanted to be in command, he was more than happy to allow it. They were wearing far too many clothes, but he’d have to deal with that.
“Babe, grinding on me is gonna get you a one-way ticket to the bedroom. It doesn’t matter whose, just as long as there’s a lock on the door.”
“Oh really?” Her hair fell
forward and tickled his cheek.
“Really. Keep going and the only thing you’ll be saying is my name.”
Libby smiled. “Got all the lines today, don’t you?”
“I don’t need lines around you. I just tell it like it is. I want you any way I can get you.”
“Well, on the grass in front of my child and employer isn’t the best choice.”
Taylor rolled his hips, loving the way her cheeks flushed in response. “We could run and hide. I’d make sure no one found us, and I wouldn’t keep you in the bedroom for too long.”
“That’s good of you,” she said, smirking.
“Because there are plenty of places I can have my way with you.”
“Have your way?”
“Okay then, there are plenty of places I can fuck you, Blue.” He grinned when her pink cheeks darkened further. “Do you like my dirty words?”
“No.”
“Liar.”
She shook her head.
“Liar,” he repeated. “Now kiss me.”
“I already did that.”
“So do it again. I like it.”
He’d never experienced the kind of banter he shared with Libby. Verbally sparring with Dale had always been fun, but it was different with Libby. With her it was foreplay, and the interaction made him desperate for a taste of her.
Late last night he’d reasoned with himself that it would be easier for them all if he started to withdraw—to distance himself from their little group. Libby and Levi would be just fine without him.
But the fact that she was pinning him to the ground and he was demanding a kiss showed his resolution was shit.
He loved this woman. How the fuck was he going to leave?
“Are you planning on keeping me this way forever?” he asked, elevating his hips to make sure she could feel his arousal.
She shrugged one shoulder. “Maybe that’s exactly what I want.”
Taylor’s pulse quickened. “You want me here forever, Blue?” he asked, his voice little more than a whisper.
Her eyes glistened, brimming with tears. He knew how she felt, because whenever he imagined leaving, it brought him to his knees. His addiction to her was far worse than the one for cocaine.
Libby nodded once as her shoulders slumped. She let go of his wrists, hanging her head so he couldn’t see her face behind her hair. He loved her hair but grew irritated at the way it blocked his view.
“Shit, babe, I—”
Taylor’s words caught in his throat as Levi ran over and threw himself at his mom, roaring as loud as he could.
“Attack!” he yelled, wrapping his arms around her neck.
Taylor was quick to snatch Levi’s ankle and pull him off Libby’s back. The kid lay on the grass, thrashing his legs as Taylor hovered over him, wriggling his fingers. “Payback’s fair, brat. I suppose I have no choice but to tickle you.”
Levi squealed, squirming to get away. “I’m not ticklish,” he said.
“So why are you trying to hide behind your momma?”
Levi jutted out his bottom lip. “Not hiding.” He lay still. “Go on, then. Tickle me.”
Pride filled Taylor’s chest as he stared at Libby’s son. “Well done, kid. Face your fears head-on.” He turned his gaze on Libby. “Someone taught me that anything can be achieved if you face your demons.”
Libby offered him a sad smile, her eyes still glistening. The tick of the clock grew louder.
“You’re not a demon. You’re cool, and I’m glad you live here now. Aren’t you, Mom?”
Libby’s breath hitched, and she toyed with the hem of her shirt. “Sweetheart, Taylor has family back in Sea Pointe. He has an apartment and a job. He’s not staying here.”
Levi jumped up, fisting his hands and placing them on his hips. “He can stay. I heard Pops talking on the phone. He said Taylor could stay as long as he liked.”
“When did you hear that?”
“Before. I went into the house to get the camera. The phone rang and Pops answered it. I think it was Taylor’s daddy.”
Taylor ground his teeth at the mention of his father. “What else did you hear?” he asked, trying to keep the aggression out of his tone.
“Something about Uncle Kyran’s wedding. Dunno.”
Libby quirked a brow. “Uncle Kyran?”
Levi shrugged.
“I’m going to find Josh.” Taylor stood up and wiped the stray blades of grass from his jeans. He leaned over and kissed Libby on the top of her head. “We’ll talk later.”
She squinted up at him. “There’s nothing to talk about. Nothing has changed. You do have a life in Sea Pointe. And don’t get too heated with Josh—you have a call with the doctor in a while.” She grasped Taylor’s hand to steady herself as she stood.
“Just kiss me,” he said.
She rolled her eyes but kissed him anyway, ignoring Levi’s sound of disgust. The kiss did little to sate his hunger for her, but it would have to do.
He took the porch steps two at a time. Kyran must have gone back home and given their father the lowdown on what he’d been doing at the ranch. His dad could suck it. He wouldn’t allow the whispers behind his back. If he wanted to know what was happening with him, he needed to open his damn mouth and ask.
“Josh!” he hollered as he stepped through the front door. His voice echoed around the empty house. “Are you in here? Josh!”
A creak came from the stairs, and Taylor spun around to see his uncle walking slowly down them. With each movement he winced, his hand rubbing at his hip.
“Something wrong?” Taylor asked, not surprised when Josh shook his head.
“Just an ache. I’m old. It happens.”
“You sure?”
“Very. Now what were you hollering about?”
Taylor took a deep breath in an attempt to stay calm. “My father. You spoke to him.”
“I get the feeling you’re accusing me of something, boy.” He stepped down from the last stair. “I just can’t figure out what it is. Maybe you should spit it out and save us both a bit of time.”
“You were talking to him about me. I want to know what he was asking and why he doesn’t ask me himself.”
“I think you should watch your tone. I’m allowed to speak to my own brother.”
He had a point, but it didn’t make Taylor back down. He hated that his father couldn’t call and speak to him. Why did he need to go through Josh?
“And he asked about me?”
Josh’s cheek twitched, leaving Taylor no doubt.
“Drop the bone, kid. It was nothing major. He just wanted to make sure you’d be ready to leave in time for your brother’s wedding. They made sure the date coincided with the date your six months were up. Kyran and Dale want you there.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh. Taylor, I know you and Jacob butt heads. I know you came here because he gave you no choice, but remember you’re his son. He does love you. He worries.”
Taylor sneered. “Yeah, of course he does. He doesn’t give a crap.”
“Really? You think he doesn’t care about you? You are so far off the mark you can’t even see the damn thing. He loves you. He just has a piss poor way of showing it.”
“No shit.”
Josh gripped the back of the couch with both hands, his back turned to Taylor. When he spoke, his voice was calmer. “The money.”
“Excuse me?”
“The money to help Libby. Where the hell did you think it came from? If your father didn’t care, he wouldn’t give a shit whether your girlfriend needed help. He’s never even met her.” Josh righted himself and turned to face Taylor. “I wish the three of you would sort this out. I should lock you in a room and let you all beat the crap out of each other.”
“Kyran would win.” He stared at his uncle, his lips twitching when Josh smiled, and before he knew it they were laughing.
“You’re right. He’d kick your ass in a second.”
Taylor nodded, shuffling
awkwardly from one foot to the other. “Sorry I yelled.”
Josh’s eyes bulged. “Did I hear right? Did Taylor Reese just apologize? Jesus H. Christ.”
“Whatever.” Taylor leaned back against the wall and knocked his head against it three times. “I want to go to Kyran’s wedding. But . . .”
“But what? You’ve come a long way from the angry little shit who arrived here. Only minutes ago you apologized to me, so go another step and talk to me.”
Taylor swallowed, his throat tight as he tried to work through the crap in his head. “I have so much going on in here.” He tapped his temple. “And even more going on in here.” He placed his hand over his heart. “I’m more fucked up now than I was when I arrived.”
“Not possible.”
“Life was far easier when I could zone out.”
Josh snorted but said nothing, leaving a silence between them that Taylor needed to fill. He exhaled. “Libby.” Simply saying her name made him feel calmer. “I don’t know what I’m going to do without her.”
Josh ran his hand over his head and pressed his lips into a thin line. “And what about Levi?”
“Yeah, that one gets to me even more.” He met his uncle’s wary stare. “I love him, too, Josh.”
“Then I’ll tell you what I told your father. You’re welcome here for as long as you want to stay. You’ve been a great help around here. I’m reluctant to say I struggle to do a lot of things. Before you came, I was toying with the idea of taking someone on to do those jobs, but I’m stubborn. You’ve been just what this place needed.”
“I don’t know what to do.”
“Of course you don’t. Libby has knocked the wind right out of you, hasn’t she? Maybe the few days away for Kyran’s wedding will help?”
Taylor cringed. “I don’t want to go back to Sea Pointe right now.”
Josh closed the distance between them and tapped Taylor on the cheek with his palm. “Good thing the wedding is on Barren Island, then, isn’t it?”
“I could ask Libby to come with me.”
“She wouldn’t leave Levi or take him out of school,” Josh said, shaking his head. “You need to go. The space will give you a clearer vision of what to do.”