Sensible and Sensational
by Jenni James
Trifecta Books
Book design and layout copyright © 2015 by Trifecta Publishing
Cover design copyright © 2015 by Jenni James
This is a work of fiction, and the views expressed herein are the sole responsibility of the author. Likewise, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are represented fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events or locales, is entirely coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means whatsoever without written permission from the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
Copyright © 2015 by Jenni James
DEDICATION:
This book is dedicated to my son with autism. You are my hero, my genius, and my light. I love you.
And to all those who have a form of this incredible gift.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS:
I would like to thank my Heavenly Father for the insight to produce a book with such a fascinating and gentle main character. And I would like to thank my husband and kids, whose patience with me while I pursue my dream of writing so many books is the best. I love you all!
Table of Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Author Bio
Sensible and Sensational
by Jenni James
My dad died suddenly six weeks ago, and my whole world crashed. I’d heard of pain before—that horrendous grieving pain that others talk about or you see in movies—but I’d never experienced it until then. I didn’t realize how much I needed my dad until he was gone, either. At seventeen, I don’t think you notice as much as you’d like to. Whatever it was, I didn’t know how much I loved my dad until I couldn’t tell him anymore.
CHAPTER ONE: SCHOOL BLUES
I hated going to new schools. I hated it. Like, seriously. Even that simple change from elementary to middle school and then to high school—it completely freaked me out. But this was worse. This was way way way way way… okay, so it was bad. Not only was it a new school in Bloomfield, New Mexico, but it was a new house—new city, new state,—new school. As in, totally awkwardly confusing and chaotic and everybody in your face and talking at once and just—argh!! Why can’t change happen without all the confusion?
“Hey, you’re the new girl, right? Ellyn? Or are you the other twin, Maralyn?”
There, standing in front of me, was a very good-looking guy. Like, the total swim team/soccer nut athletic-type guy. And he was smiling this gorgeous smile while talking in this deepish voice, and . . . and . . . and . . . I blinked. “I’m sorry. What, um, what did you say?” Stay cool, Ellyn. Take a deep breath and focus. Don’t stress out. He’s not too close. Just focus.
The guy glanced down the hall—thankfully, it was beginning to thin out and wasn’t so claustrophobic—and then he looked back at me and chuckled. Hazel eyes, all sparkly and—good grief! I was beginning to think like my sister Maralyn.
“Let’s start at the beginning. Hi, I’m Zane.”
Oh! He was holding out his hand. I switched my books and shook his hand. Maybe it was a little too hard—I didn’t know. I really try to stay away from the whole touching thing, and have never quite mastered the art of—you know, shaking hands. “Hi. I’m Ellyn. But you can call me Ellyn, or um, Elly, or Ella, or even Elle. Or my mom calls me by my middle name and I really don’t want to tell you what that is, so I won’t.” Oh, my gosh. Can I be any more of a dork? Seriously? I wanted to die. Why wasn’t my sister there? She loves guys. Cute ones with gorgeous smiles, too. And she doesn’t sound lame while trying to interact.
He laughed. “Well, what do you like to be called, then?”
I thought about it for a minute. No one had ever asked me that question before. “I don’t know. I’m not sure.”
His eyebrows rose.
I was probably scaring him. My shoulder twitched, and my throat went dry, and suddenly, my arm itched. I held on to my books tightly. Do not scratch. Do not scratch.
“Right. Well, I’ll just call you Ellyn until you figure it out.” He cleared his throat. “So, hi. I’m your guide for the day to kind of help you get to your classes.”
What? I needed a guide? Was he serious? “Why?”
He seemed a bit hesitant. “The school assigned me to show you the ropes. You know, so things don’t feel awkward for you.”
He was going to be with me all day? That would be awkward. I really, really wanted to be on my own. This wasn’t good at all. “Okay. Thanks.” I scratched my arm.
“So, who do you have first hour? Let’s get you there.”
“Oh. I remembered a few seconds ago, but now I forgot. I do that sometimes—just forget things.” I switched my books to my other arm, reached into my back pocket, and pulled out my schedule.
“Yeah, I think we all forget stuff.”
I nodded and attempted to unfold the paper one-handed. “Well, I’m particularly forgetful. I’m probably the queen of forgetfulness. I mean—not always. I’m really good at focusing until someone distracts me, or talks to me, or does something like stands next to me and breathes—yeah, then I just forget what I’m doing.”
“Here. Let me help you before you drop one of those books.” Zane gently took the paper from my hand.
I shifted the pile again. “My other school had an iPad, and all our curriculum was on it. It was nice. We didn’t need to lug books around.”
“It looks like you’ve got Mrs. Cheswick.” He glanced down at the books I was carrying. “Would you like me to take some of those for you?”
“No, I’m good. They’re no big—”
He took them anyway. “These are nothing. This is just the info from the school. Wait until you see the real books.”
“What? Are you kidding me?” I could feel my chest tighten.
“Nope.” His eyes twinkled as they looked down at me.
A small part of me began to panic. “Darn, I really hoped you were. I don’t think I could carry anything else right now. And I also wish I had a backpack.”
He nudged my shoulder and totally caused me to jump. “Hey, I was teasing. There aren’t more books. We’re not cool enough for iPads, but we’ve got laptops. And during flex period, I’ll take you over and sign you up for one. Did you bring the thirty-five-dollar insurance fee for it?” He began to walk down the hall.
I followed him. “I don’t know. Maybe.” There was a fee? No one had told me about a fee. What happened if I didn’t have the money that day? I wasn’t even sure my mom had any extra cash right now—especially with losing Dad and just moving and now Maralyn and I would both need thirty-five dollars. Great.
“You think about stuff a lot don’t you?”
I looked up to see those hazel eyes again. “You noticed,
huh?” I tried not to wince as I glanced away. I wasn’t sure I succeeded.
He shrugged. “I notice a lot of things. But don’t worry—you’re cute when you think.”
“What?” My jaw dropped. No one had ever said anything like that to me before.
He stopped at a door. “Here we are. Your first class. Come on in.” He stood back to let me pass.
I didn’t budge. “What did you say?”
Zane grinned. “You heard me. Now come into your class.”
I blushed. For no reason at all, this huge, awful flush came over me. “Okay.” Clutching my elbows, I walked into the room and willed myself to calm down. The teacher looked over and stopped talking as I entered.
“Hello,” she said.
All at once, a bunch of teens were staring at me and my red face. I blinked. Why did everyone have to stare? I hated it when I was the center of attention. Please look away. I could feel every single pair of eyes as if they were drills boring into me. It was too much. Too fast. Everything was a whirlwind of confusion, and I couldn’t think. I couldn’t do this right now.
Get out of here. Go. Run. Move. Now!
Just as Zane was closing the door, I bumped into him and pushed it back open again. As soon as I got into the empty hallway, I could feel my hands begin to shake and my heart race, and that stupid red face of mine only getting redder.
I was a freak. Everyone was going to think I was stupid for running out of class like that. Ugh.
“Hey, are you all right?”
Zane touched my shoulder. I quickly moved out of his reach, making sure my back was to him. “Yeah, I’m awesome. I just need a minute to myself first.”
“That’s cool. Take some time to relax. It’s rough going to a new school, isn’t it?”
Why was he talking? I didn’t need more chatter right now—I needed calm. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I hated going to a new school. I hated it. Dad used to make it a little better for me. He always had a chocolate cake with sprinkles waiting for me and my sister when we came home. We all pretended it was a special occasion because it was a new school, but I knew it was because of me. Because this was the hardest part of being me. This right here. I just lost it sometimes and did weird things like run away.
Dad used to sneak me an extra piece of cake once everyone had left the kitchen. He’d hug me tight and tell me how proud he was of me and then ask way too many questions, which drove me nuts, but I needed them. I needed him. He made me feel normal and pretty and fun and … I missed him. I missed him so much.
“Ellyn?”
I didn’t realize I’d started to cry until Zane handed me a tissue. It was crumpled, and he looked totally embarrassed.
“Sorry. It’s not used—I swear! I put it in my pocket this morning. I promise.”
I wasn’t going to take it. I had this thing about crumpled tissues. But his face was adorable, and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, so I did. “Thank you.”
“You’re really shy, aren’t you?” He grinned. I could tell he was still trying to figure me out.
I shook my head. “No. Not even close. I don’t mind sharing—I just can’t sometimes. I like people and learning and seeing new things, but I get overwhelmed if it’s too much. My brain works faster than I can keep up with sometimes, and I tend to freak out a little bit until I can calm down and fix things one at a time.”
I was worried that I might’ve scared him, but he seemed pretty chill about everything. He was probably supposed to be super nice to everyone, which is why the school chose him, because he was most likely the nicest guy here—but whatever the reason, I kinda liked feeling okay.
“So, do you have ADHD or something?” he asked, not in a mocking tone, just a matter-of-fact friendly chat-type tone, as if he were genuinely interested.
“No. Uh, it’s different than that.” I looked away.
“Would you like to tell me about it?”
I let the question hang between us. I was beginning to sort of like him. I mean, I wasn’t dumb enough to believe we’d ever go out on a date or anything, but maybe we’d be friends or something. Except I knew that what I was going to say next would ruin it completely. Not that it mattered—I preferred to be on my own anyway. Maralyn was more the outgoing, popular type. I thought of myself as the nerdish, practical sister who sometimes sort of had episodes when things began to get crazy around me.
“Uh, yeah.” I took a deep breath, twisted my hands together, and then sealed my fate. “I have high-functioning autism.”
His face lit up, and he said the last thing I’d ever expected to hear from a teenager, the exact thing my dad had always said to me. “Oh, wow! So you’re a genius.”
CHAPTER TWO: An Awakening
By the end of school, I realized it probably hadn’t been that bad of a day after all. Sure, there was definitely some awkwardness, but I think I did okay. The kids were friendly, so that was good too. And apart from stumbling over a few words, I survived Zane, which had to be some sort of record for me. Interacting with guys wasn’t exactly my specialty. Okay, so I’d never really tried before. Or rather, there’d never really been a guy who’d wanted to get to know me. I honestly had no idea if Zane would ever talk to me again, now that I didn’t need his help, but today had been a good day. He made me feel sort of normal. And I liked it.
Clutching my laptop and those darn books, I met up with Maralyn at the front of the school. “How’d it go?” I asked as she approached, looking like a model for a magazine ad.
She had all her things tucked nicely in a cute bag, and she grinned as she bounded toward me. We only had one class together—biology. We didn’t even have the same lunch. “Oh, my gosh, can you believe how awesome this school is? I’m going to love it here! There are so many fun boys.” She held up a paper. “And I’ve already been asked to audition for the dance team!”
It figured she’d fit right in. I rolled my eyes, even though I was happy for her. “So it was that good, huh?”
She waggled her brows and grinned. “You have no idea. Plus, I’ve got a few digits of potential boys to date in my cell phone now.” She held it out to show me.
“Ellyn! Wait up!”
We both glanced back, and I was sort of shocked to see Zane heading toward us. My heart jolted when he came up to us and smiled. “So, do you guys live over there?” He pointed the way we were headed.
“Yeah.” Maralyn grinned and twirled her hair around her finger. She was totally checking him out. “Hi. I’m—”
“Maralyn. Yeah, I know. Hi. Welcome to the school. I’m Zane Ferrars.” He turned to me. “So, Ellyn, could I join you? I’d be happy to walk you home.”
Maralyn’s jaw dropped.
I laughed, but I was more amazed than anything. No one ever ignored Maralyn. “Haven’t you gotten sick of me yet?”
He slowly grinned and shook his head. His eyes looked bright green in the sunlight. “Are you kidding me? I’ve been dying to finish our debate.”
“Wait.” Maralyn looked at each of us. “You had a debate?”
I didn’t know how to say this without hurting her feelings, but there’s no way she would’ve been able to keep up with our conversation earlier. “Yeah, during lunch. He was trying to tell me that Nikola Telsa’s technology was more advanced than Thomas Edison’s, and I don’t know if I’m buying it.”
He looked surprised. “How could you not? The man invented wireless electricity, wireless lightbulbs in the eighteen hundreds. Can you imagine if he’d gotten his patent and we had those things now? None of us would have to be on the grid. I bet the technology would’ve advanced, and everything would be wireless. And I mean everything. Our TVs, computers, appliances, vacuums—you name it.”
“Right.” Maralyn chuckled and shook her head like we were crazy. “You two rocket scientists have at it. I’m gonna call my bestie from Arizona and see what she’s doing.” She flipped around and started walking home.
Dang it. She’d left me alone. All of a su
dden, my throat went dry, and my arm started to itch again. Everything was different now. Zane’s assignment was finished. He didn’t have to be with me—now he wanted to hang out. “So, hi,” I said, and then cleared my throat.
Zane’s smile was contagious as he looked away and then back at me again. “Hi. So, did I interrupt something? Would you rather walk with your sister? Um … I hope she’s not mad.”
“Yes. Well, no. I don’t know.” I was making no sense at all. I took a deep breath and tried again. “I’m sure she’s fine. So, where do you live?”
“Probably right past you. Did you move into the house on Sycamore Avenue? The one that was for rent?”
“Yep.” I wasn’t sure if I should be worried or flattered that he knew where I lived.
“I thought so. I saw a moving truck the other day. I would’ve come over to help, but my dad needed me to work at his store. I don’t mind the money, but man, I really don’t like working there. Did you ever have a job like that?”
There was way too much information hitting me at once. I took another deep breath and tried to process. “So, you were going to come over and help us move in, but couldn’t?”
“Sorry. Lame, I know.”
I started to walk forward. “You really are nice. Who’d do that?”
He hitched his backpack on his shoulder and shrugged as he joined me. “Lots of people around here help each other. We’re a smaller community, so we’re used to being there for our neighbors.”
I nodded, not sure what to think of people helping so much. It definitely sounded different.
“Where did you move from? I guess I never asked that earlier. Your sister’s calling someone in Arizona. Is that where you lived? And what jobs have you had?”
I was imagining what it would have been to meet him the day we moved here. I heard him, but I honestly had no idea what he’d just asked me. So I pointed that out. “You really ask a lot of questions at once.”