“Good girl.” A sob escaped when he said this as it felt as though I had heard it so many times before and not once when doing so had it not felt like it came from the deepest levels of love. This was the moment. This was what it felt like to be loved. Loved so much it made you do crazy things. Incredible things. It made you do the impossible but above all…
It made you survive.
Unsurprisingly I woke up to find it had all been another dream. But boy, what a dream! Not only had I finally broken through the mirror but I had also had my first encounter with him in a way that I never knew was possible. Yes, he scared me but when he touched me the way he had done it made me yearn for that fear in ways I could barely comprehend let alone explain.
This time it had all felt different, unlike before when I had received his anger at him finding the wrong version of me in his room. It was as if the last barrier between me and that world was as simple as opening my eyes to the truth of where I truly belonged. Before,looking in was like watching a secret life of my fantasies play out like an opera. What once felt like a sinful act of imagining the impossible or improbable world in which she lived was now becoming a sinful act in ignoring it. Because what if Ari was right, what if she had been hit with the proof we both needed but was robbed of the time to explain it to me?
What if this was the improbable world we lived in? The world created behind the walls keeping us locked in a prison, one we didn’t even know about. What if all this time my other self had been trying to get me out, what if I had been the prisoner…could that be possible?
I sat up shaking my head wondering if thinking this wasn’t just torturing myself further. I didn’t know where that place was and you would have thought that if that was my goal then I would have received more clues up until now. But other than that one word ‘Afterlife’ I had nothing to go on.
Needless to say the genius search of putting ‘Afterlife’ in Google awarded me with thousands of theories on what happened after death. So I wasn’t all that surprised when it didn’t offer up any solutions. That night I joined Lucy and her husband for dinner and I didn’t miss Denis’ smirks when seeing how much I obviously enjoyed Lucy’s home cooking. In fact it felt like eating real food for the first time and I quickly realised one of my new favourite things in life was spicy food. I don’t ever remember feeling so full before and in the end Lucy had to cut me off before I made myself sick, besides she said, “There is dessert”.
When this turned out to contain chocolate, to my shame I actually moaned out loud. Denis burst out laughing and Lucy scowled at him but it wasn’t long before I too was laughing. I explained how it had been a long time since my chocolate days and this turned out to be a good thing as I was given the biggest piece of brownie.
“Ha, not laughing now are you!” Lucy said to Denis making us all burst out laughing again.
Having dinner with the both of them felt so at ease I was quickly getting to a point where I never wanted to leave. It gave me a taste of the good life and I envied Kelly, Lucy’s daughter, for having the upbringing I always dreamed of. If only Ari could have been here, then I think my world would have been complete. It was obvious that Lucy was in no hurry to see me out the door and kept saying I was welcome to stay as long as I wanted.
At first I had been worried that her husband might not have the same feelings as Lucy but after dinner it was clear my fears were for nothing. After I thanked him for letting me stay he leant over and whispered to me once Lucy was clearing the table,
“I learnt a long time ago, that a happy wife equals a happy life.” I gave him a beaming grin before standing to help Lucy in the kitchen. Yes, I liked Denis and I adored Lucy. To be honest I think since Kelly had left for College that Lucy didn’t know what to do with herself and me being here was offering up a nice little distraction. Well if I could help in any way, as I knew repaying them back for the kindness they had shown was something I could only wish to do one day.
Lucy talked about them always wanting to go abroad and seeing Europe but money had been tight since paying for their daughter’s college, so their plan was to go when she had finished her last year. I went to bed that night thinking about once all this was done and Ari and I were finally making it in the world then maybe I could do something.
This fantasy popped in my head of surprising them both one day with tickets to France or maybe Spain. Saving up my tips and paying for that trip sooner than they expected. Yes, that was what I was going to try and do. Maybe it wouldn’t be soon but one day. I would do it even if I had to work as many shifts as a waitress or every hour at the supermarket that I could, I was going to get them their dream. Because I knew how important dreams were to people and I knew what it was like to hope for something in your life and even if they knew it or not, they had helped me with my dream, so it was only fair that I help them with theirs.
But first thing was first and that was…
“What on earth was Afterlife?”
I grabbed the laptop that Lucy had left in the room with me in case I couldn’t sleep and wouldn’t you know, she was right. I opened it back up, squinted against the bright screen and after finding my new best friend ‘Google’ I typed in the same thing I had fifty times before.
The first searches were all the same. There were films, TV series, even books and that was before all the hundreds of pages all relating to what happened after death. So this was when I thought it was time to get a little creative. First I typed in ‘Afterlife people’ but this only got me a list of Spiritual guidance and foundations and also links to articles titled ‘My glimpses of the afterlife mean I no longer fear death’.
I even started to research dreams and visions but this only got me even more frustrated. But then an idea formed, what if some spiritual guidance was what I needed? So then I changed my search yet again, only this time I was looking for anything from palm readers, fortune tellers, tarot readers, mystics and clairvoyants, anyone who might be able to give me insight to what was obviously locked away inside my mind. I didn’t care who and at this rate I was even willing to be hypnotised as long as it meant finding something useful in there.
But this again posed my next problem as I didn’t have any money and these types of people usually asked for a fee. Not that I could blame them I guess as everyone needed to live and buy food and at the moment I could do neither. I would have to ask Lucy in morning if she knew of anywhere I could get a job, if only for a short time as that was the one thing not on my side at the moment…
Time.
One month.
That’s all I had. Because playing back Ari’s words and her saying they wouldn’t kill her yet was what she must have meant. I also surmised that the reason a girl was allowed to leave, which was actually code for being brutally murdered, was so they could continue with whatever their plans were. Ari had mentioned something about shields, so this could have been it. Either way I believed deep in my soul that Ari was still alive and would at least remain this way until the next full moon.
This then had me wondering if that Righteous Blood in the barn had actually been acting out against orders or if he wasn’t going to kill her, just meant to punish her for sneaking me out. No matter what the answer to that was, I couldn’t find myself regretting what I had done. However, my regrets did include what happened next and that was escaping without my sister with me.
I shook away these thoughts knowing they wouldn’t get me anywhere. I now had to focus on doing what she told me and that was to listen to my dreams and find the people she believed could help me. I had to wonder if I wasn’t just wasting time by chasing visions of people that might not even be real. It was a wild goose chase without even seeing a goose before or knowing if one even exists for that matter. Because the heart of it all was that I had no proof that they, or more like he, was even real. That was a terrifying thought in itself and a crushing one at that.
No, I had to believe he was real and I had to believe that he was out there somewhere because
if he wasn’t then it wasn’t just me and my sister that was lost but according to Ari…
It was the world.
Chapter 10
The Perfect Answer
The next day was like having half of my prayers answered. Lucy came into my room and asked if I would like to help her in the kitchen as she was making cakes to sell for a bake stall at the county fair. It was to help raise money for a new roof for her local chapel and I was more than happy to help. To be honest anything that got me away from my new obsession with a search engine was going to be a bonus. Besides any way I could finally show my gratitude wasn’t something I was going to pass up on.
Baking with Lucy was fun and I found myself wishing more and more that I could have had a mother like her. But no amount of wishing it was going to change things so it was better to focus on the now, and now was filled with laughing and giggling over cake batter. She asked if I wanted to come along later and help her out, which I was only too happy to do. She told me about the fair they had every year in town and how Denis had come so close to being crowned the ‘Veggie King’.
She started laughing so hard when she saw my utter look of confusion and whilst pointing her gooey wooden spoon at me she said,
“You should see your face…such a picture.” Then she started spooning her mixture into tins as she started to explain.
“The contestants all have to see who can throw a vegetable the furthest starting with…I don’t know, let’s say a carrot…then as each person who comes last gets knocked out of the contest, the next round starts again only the vegetable gets bigger. I think that last round is a pumpkin. It’s a lot of fun.” Lucy assured me and I was giggling just thinking about it.
“I’m looking forward to it.” I told her honestly making her smile.
“It will be nice having another person cheering for my Denis, who knows, maybe it’s finally his year to win.” Lucy said, smiling to herself. After that all I could think was how much I hoped it was his year too.
“That looks lovely.” Lucy said and I looked down at the cake I had just made. It was as if I had been on autopilot and making something I had made hundreds of times before, only strangely, this was my first time. It was a chocolate cake with cream and fresh strawberries in the middle and I had just finished pouring on the melted chocolate for the top.
“Thanks, Lucy.” I said trying not to let on that I had no clue how I had made it without a recipe to follow, it had all just come naturally to me. It gave me a deep sense that my sister loved it when I made this cake, which was even stranger when I had never made it for Ari before.
“I think you should make a few more like that, as they are going to sell like hot cakes!” I smiled at her kind words and just hoped I wouldn’t disappoint when I forgot how I even made the first one. But just like last time my mind took over and before I knew it I had four more on the go.
The next thing I knew Lucy’s friends started pouring in and placing cakes and pies down wherever there was space. The place looked like a bakery and the smell, wow…all I knew was that if there was a heaven and there was a distinct smell about it, then it would be this one. Who knew I had such a sweet tooth!
“And who is this fine lady?” One of Lucy’s friends asked who smirked and looked as if she was out to cause mischief.
“Ah, well this is one of my cousin’s daughters, Katie… she’s from up state.” Lucy said not even breaking into a sweat.
“Pleased to meet you, Ma’am.” I said after first wiping my hand and then offering it to her.
“Oh my Dex is just going to love you. Isn’t she a dear?” The older woman said taking my hand in hers and talking about me as though I couldn’t hear.
“Jennifer! Behave…honestly she will do anything to set her son Dex up.” I laughed blushing at the idea.
“Oh Honey Jesus, she even blushes!” Jennifer said to Lucy who just waved her off with a tea towel.
“Yep and she makes chocolatestrawberry cake from scratch as well…this looks delicious, Katie.” Another one of Lucy’s friends said getting in on the action.
“Thank you.” I said getting shy from receiving so much attention.
“Oh Mercy be! She can cook as well, upon my word Lucy, where do you find them! In fact, I will buy this one right now. My Dex just loves chocolate cake and I want to get in there before these puppies are snatched up.” Jennifer said hurrying over to one that had already been wrapped up.
“Well that’s not fair, if you’re buying one then I want one too!” The other friend said picking up one of the others and I thought I was close to seeing war of the cakes. Lucy came over to me and whispered,
“Cake, gossip and marrying off sons can get brutal…welcome to suburbia Katie.” I giggled and then asked,
“Should I make some more?”
“I think that’s a good idea.” Lucy replied winking at me just after Denis had walked in and asked,
“Is that a chocolate cake with strawberries?”
After many more chocolates cakes later we were at the fair and selling most of our stock in the first hour. It was lovely to see Lucy interacting with everyone as it was clear she was well loved within her community. She seemed proud when introducing me to everyone as her cousin’s daughter and as a result everyone was more than welcoming. It was strange but it gave me a sense of belonging, one I hadn’t felt since…well, since forever.
Once all the baked goods had been sold we packed up our stall and walked around the rest of the fair arm in arm.
“The day has been amazing, thank you so much for including me.”
“Are you kidding, with all the help you gave me and not to mention the fact that I was getting double the price I would normally ask thanks to those amazing chocolate cakes of yours …I don’t know where you get it from but you definitely have skills in the kitchen…in fact I don’t know how I ever did it without you.” I smiled and then asked,
“Did Kelly ever help you out?” At this she laughed.
“Kelly enjoyed eating them more than she would ever have done baking them…besides that girl could burn ice cream given half the chance.” I laughed alongside her but my mind flashed to burnt pizzas and a beautiful redhead trying to wave the smoke away with a tea towel. Who was that and where had that memory suddenly sprung from?
“Hey, you okay?” Lucy asked jarring me back into this world and I looked around to realise I had stopped dead at the vision.
“Yeah, sorry, I’m good.”
“Oh, that’s the bell, we’d better go or we will be late.”
“For what?” I asked looking around and seeing everyone had started moving off in the same direction.
“The Veggie King Competition of course.”
When we got there people made room for Lucy and I to get to the front and I gathered this was because her husband was competing.
“Oh Lord, but I am nervous for him.” She said grabbing my hand once and giving it a squeeze. ‘The Arena’ consisted of an open field with white lines spray painted in arches to show the distances they had to try and throw. The first round was called ‘Catapult the Carrot’ and I had to laugh when a woman dressed as a farmer came out and held up boards with the name of the first round, just like you would get at a boxing match. I only remembered this from another of my father’s favourite movies which was Rocky.
“He’s got this.” Lucy said leaning into me and nudging me on my arm. It was so sweet when she started yelling his name when it was his turn to throw. The love simply oozed out of her and the sight had me smiling. It was so beautiful to witness a woman so focused on her husband and cheering him on like no one else mattered. It made me long to find that type of love for myself one day and I knew I would treasure every second of it.
“GO DENIS! THROW THAT CARROT! WHOOOOHOOO!” She shouted when he stepped up to the line and threw the carrot the furthest. I screamed and cheered right alongside with her and Denis turned round and bowed to the crowd making them cheer louder.
I looked over t
o another part of the field when hearing more people cheering and realised that they had the similar thing on for the younger kids, only with fruit. I looked around at all these people smiling and chatting, cheering and shouting together and realised this was what a community was all about. Supporting each other and no doubt banding together when in times of struggle. Having that shoulder to cry on when experiencing a loss or that kind neighbour you know would help you out if you ever got a flat tyre.
The sense that you were never alone when walking that lonely road that life can sometimes offer. Because friends were important and could love you like family. Or in my case love you more if I had to compare Lucy to my own wicked mother.
“He did it again! He won the ‘Toss the Turnip’ round!” Lucy said clapping in excitement.
“That’s great!” I said clapping with her as he once again bowed to the crowd.
“He’s such a show off!” Lucy said shaking her head, smirking.
“Oh dear, he always struggles with this one, its ‘Lob the Lettice’ time.” Lucy held up her crossed fingers and went back to screaming her husband’s name when his turn was next.
“Don’t forget to stretch…STRETCH!” She shouted putting her hands around her mouth like a megaphone. He waved her off and then started to do as he was told anyway, stretch his arms from side to side. I couldn’t help but giggle watching five middle aged men all dressed as farmers getting ready as if they were at the gym.
“YES! You did it! He did it! GO DENIS!” Lucy was again screaming when he only just managed to throw his lettuce a fraction closer to the white line.
“Okay so there are only two rounds left, ‘Hurl the Horseradish’ and ‘Pitch the Pumpkin’ and he’s done it!”
“He can do it.” I said patting her on the shoulder and offering my support. Then I linked arms with her and we both watched the next two rounds play out. The ‘Hurl the Horseradish’ turned out as an equal tie and Lucy leaned over and whispered,