He had told no one of his relative indifference during the assault on Ryerson and his crew. He didn’t consider it to be of any relevance. They were fools tempting a vengeful fate, and they had done so with an attitude so cavalier that the gene pool was well rid of them.
The Rangers, on the other hand …
His earlier contempt for the Rangers had long since dissipated. As one month rolled into another, Daniel became not only more and more impressed by the character and caliber of the Rangers, but thrilled and honored to be a part of the organization.
And the better he felt about the corps, the better he felt about himself. He had become part of a brotherhood, and he now had something to live for: to serve alongside them and help keep them alive to the best of his ability.
Fraud. Fraud. FRAUD.
“You okay?”
An arm draped around his shoulder. It was Martes, who was arguably the best friend he had in his squadron. Martes was tall, lanky, with a sense of humor that was funny mostly to him. When he’d first encountered Daniel, Daniel had been uncertain and a bit standoffish. This had proven an irresistible combination to Martes, who had taken it upon himself, for no reason that Daniel could discern, to drag him, “kicking and screaming,” from his shell. Martes, as much as anyone and more than some, was responsible for the Ranger that Daniel had become, the one who had earned such unreserved compliments from Freed. Eventually Daniel and Martes had bonded during a particularly brutal survival training episode, and they’d had each other’s back ever since.
The only frustration that Martes had met up with was when he’d tried to get Daniel to consider the romantic possibilities with some of the more comely female Rangers. Daniel had declined all comers. This had prompted Martes to wonder where Daniel’s interests lay, but Daniel had informed him that, yes, females were his “outlet” of preference. At this point in his life, though, he just preferred not to. The fact was that Ronna had so destroyed him inwardly, he simply didn’t want to open himself up to that kind of heartache anymore.
“Why, don’t I look okay?” he said to Martes.
“Dan, this should be the best day of your life and you look like you’re about to step off a cliff.”
Wow. That is so on target it’s not even funny.
“I’ve just got a lot on my mind.”
“What else can you possibly have on your mind, aside from the obvious?”
“The obvious being?”
“We—you and me—are officially the hottest things on two legs. You are a Ghost, and I’m the friend of a Ghost, and we are young, sexy, and incredibly handsome. We are irresistible. Which means the sooner you get over your obsession with Donna—”
“Ronna.”
“—the better off you’re going to be. Because you, my friend, have a lot to live for!”
And that’s the problem, isn’t it, old friend, old buddy, old pal. What made me of interest to the Rangers is that I felt like I had nothing to live for. And over time, I found something to live for. And because of that, I might well get myself killed. Myself, and others.
Because I’m nothing but a great, big fraud.
VII
In the end, Daniel knew that it had to come back to here, back to the Tangredi. These things have a way of coming full circle. It started here and it’s going to end here, too.
It had been a year since there had been any report of Ursa in the Tangredi Jungle. Ranger squads had continued to patrol there regularly for more than two months, but with no further encounters it was decided that—for the time being, at least—the area was clear. The most hopeful interpretation of the Ursa’s absence was that the multiple wounds inflicted by the Rangers had done the creature in, but the corpse remained unfound and so it was generally conceded that thinking the creature was dead was, at best, optimistic.
And now it was back. Or, at the very least, something had taken up residence in the Tangredi Jungle. Since the previous incursion, the Rangers had installed pressure-sensitive bio-detectors at random points throughout the jungle. They had remained undisturbed for many months.
But then, exactly two weeks after Daniel and his squadron had graduated, something tripped one of the detectors. To Daniel’s imagination, it was as if the Ursa were sending him a message. Are you ready for me, Daniel? You may have fooled me last time, but now we both know you for what you are. Come to me, Daniel. It’s time you joined Ryerson and his little friends.
As absurd as it may have seemed, Daniel was secretly glad for the opportunity. He still felt as if he needed to prove something to Ronna’s voice: the one in his head that continued to berate him and tell him that he would never amount to anything. If he could truly prove himself worthy of the designation of Ghost, the highest rank of the Rangers, then that would show her. And him. It would show once and for all that she was wrong to have dumped him and would go a long way toward mending his broken heart.
Martes was with Daniel, as were Rangers Xin, Ephraim, and Bastante. Three others—Calhoun, Ryan, and Stewart—had gone on ahead. He hadn’t wanted any of them along; Ghosts typically hunted alone, and he didn’t want to risk others in his squad if it wasn’t necessary. But they wouldn’t hear of it. “You’re not going to take down your first Ursa without us around to have your back.”
Captain Freed was heading up another squadron operating in another section of the jungle. Daniel desperately wished that Freed were with him, and had even suggested that Freed accompany their squadron, hoping he didn’t sound too desperate when he put forward the idea. Instead Freed had clapped a hand on his shoulder and said confidently, “You’re a natural at this, Silver. This is what you’ve been training for. You’re going to be fine.”
Daniel didn’t feel fine. He felt like a liability.
Nevertheless, he didn’t allow any of his inner turmoil to show. “We stay together,” he informed his squad as they made their way through the jungle. “No splitting up. I’ll be damned if this thing picks us off one by one.”
“Roger that,” said Ephraim. He was clearly somewhat nervous. He’d had as much training as anyone, but there was still that adrenaline-fueled worry when it came to being out in the field, chasing down the nightmare creature whose name was invoked to scare recalcitrant children when they wouldn’t go to bed at night. Every single one of the squadron had been told, at some point in their lives, “An Ursa is going to get you if you don’t behave.”
They reached the clearing that Daniel knew all too well. With a year gone by, there was no sign of the massacre that had transpired there. Daniel slowly surveyed the area and saw nothing, which of course didn’t mean a thing. Yes, he’d seen the wavery image of the Ursa employing its chameleon camouflage the last time, but that was merest happenstance since he’d been staring right at it. He reached out with his senses, his tracking abilities, everything he could bring to bear.
Nothing.
“Keep going,” he said tightly.
They moved in their smooth, practiced manner between the trees. They kept a lookout all around, listening for the slightest snap of a branch, the faintest rustling of a leaf. Anything that would betray the creature’s presence, give them even as little as a few seconds’ warning.
Still nothing.
“Starting to think we’re alone out here,” said Xin. She was clutching her cutlass tightly. Xin had been one of the most proficient wielders of the cutlass in class, and there was a look of grim determination on her face. It seemed to Daniel that she was actually anxious to take the creature on.
At least one of us is.
Daniel felt his heart pounding so hard that it was threatening to explode from his chest. He’d had no trouble maintaining calm detachment during training sessions where he was facing off against a simulated Ursa. No matter how realistic it was, it was to him no different than when he’d squared off against the holographic Ursa at the firing range. This, though, was different. This was people, men and women, depending on him. He wasn’t sure which worried him more: losing his life, or
letting down the others.
He was sure his knees were shaking. How could they not notice that?
A crack of a branch and everyone jumped, snapping into a ready position.
“Crap,” muttered Bastante. He raised his foot slightly to reveal a branch on the ground that he’d just stepped on. Ephraim promptly punched Bastante hard in the shoulder.
“Stay sharp. No screwing around,” said Daniel sharply. The others nodded, and there were muttered apologies from Bastante and Ephraim.
They kept moving, checking in with Freed’s squad as they did so.
“I smell water,” said Xin minutes later. “Up ahead.”
She was right. Ahead of them, the ground opened out onto a wide lake. The water was glass-flat with nary a ripple. Under other circumstances, it would have looked inviting.
“Perhaps we should stake this out,” suggested Martes. “Even Ursa have to drink, right?”
“I think so,” said Bastante, “but you never know for sure with Ursa.”
They drew closer to the lake’s edge, and Daniel said, “Okay … here’s what we do—”
He got no farther, however, as the Ursa exploded upward from beneath the water barely two yards in front of the gathered Rangers.
It emerged with such force and velocity that a huge gout of water erupted all around it. The water leaped up like a geyser and then cascaded down upon them with the weight of a dozen anvils, knocking them off their feet.
Daniel was reasonably certain it was the same Ursa that had attacked them a year ago. It sounded the same; he was even sure he could see scars on its hide from when the Rangers had assaulted it.
The Ursa landed squarely in the midst of the startled Rangers and let out a roar. It pivoted and went for Bastante, who was nearest. Bastante rolled backward, came up on his feet, and slashed his cutlass in a figure eight. The Ursa dodged left and then swept one of its talons forward. It sliced diagonally across Bastante’s torso from shoulder to waist. Bastante shrieked and went down, blood pouring from him like a river. The Ursa backed up, and one of its hind feet touched up against Ephraim. Ephraim tried to bring his cutlass to bear, but he had no time; the Ursa simply stomped down on his head with its hind foot and there was a noise like that of a melon being crushed.
Everyone else was still trying to get to their feet, but the ground beneath them was soaked and they were slipping helplessly on the mud. The Ursa’s head whipped around as it prepared to pick its next victim.
Daniel had managed to get to his knees. He knew the drill: The Ursa would lock onto a target and not be dissuaded from it until the target was dead. Ephraim dead. Bastante down, likely dead. They’re looking to me to protect them, and I can’t, because I don’t want to die and this thing’s going to kill us all …
What do you think, Ronna? Will this make you love me? Am I enough of a man now? Here I am in a steady job where I have to be prepared to die every day I go to work. If you knew, would you give a damn? Probably not.
All of that went through Daniel’s head in a split second, distracting him not in the slightest from the situation at hand, and then he shouted, “Here! Here, you eyeless bastard! Come and get me!”
The Ursa locked onto him. He swore he could even see the flare of its nostrils. With a roar, the Ursa barreled toward him.
Daniel closed his eyes.
In his mind, the lake was gone. The Rangers were gone. The Ursa was gone. All that was there, against his eyelids, was Ronna.
I don’t hate you, Daniel. I pity you. I pity you and myself for spending so much time with an out-and-out loser. Okay? That’s what you are. That’s all you are. A big loser. And you can say that people change all you want, but they don’t. You were a loser when I met you, and you’re a loser now, and you’re never going to accomplish anything of any worth for anybody.
She had never said anything like that, but it didn’t matter. In his own mind, he had built up his rejection to such heights that that’s how she had made him feel, even if she hadn’t actually spoken those words.
Everything that he’d felt at that moment—the humiliation, the lack of self-worth, the utter despair that overwhelmed him, the sense that nothing else would matter for the rest of his empty life—came roaring back to him. It was all he could do not to start sobbing.
He became aware of the foul breath of the Ursa upon him. He shoved himself even farther into the despair that Ronna had brought down upon him.
Then he realized the Ursa hadn’t killed him.
Slowly he opened his eyes.
The Ursa was looking around, its nostrils definitely flaring. It was trying to find him. It was six inches away from him and didn’t know where he was.
Daniel’s cutlass was retracted. Very slowly, keeping the soul-crushing diatribe of Ronna fixed in his mind, reminding himself that he was a useless loser who had nothing to live for, he positioned the cutlass so that it was directly under the Ursa’s jaw.
Then he activated it.
The blade drove straight upward at an angle, under the creature’s chin and up through the roof of its mouth.
The Ursa was unable to roar because its jaw was pinioned shut. The creature’s strongest muscles were the ones that closed its mouth; the muscles that opened it were somewhat weaker. That served to Daniel’s advantage. The creature writhed and its talons flailed in the air as Daniel forced himself to his feet, pitting his strength against the Ursa’s massive weight. It should have been an impossible mismatch, but Daniel was operating on pure adrenaline, and he felt as if he were drawing power from an endless supply. The Ursa was shoved upward, off its front paws. Daniel yanked the cutlass apart, activated the other half. He had to pull his arm back quickly because the Ursa’s thrashing talons nearly took his arm off at the shoulder. Then, for an instant, he had a clear shot. He took it, activating the other half of the cutlass and driving it directly into the side of the Ursa’s head, into its brain.
The beast shuddered violently. Even with its brain bisected, its nervous system was still firing. In its death spasms, it fell forward, and Daniel wasn’t able to get away. It landed squarely atop him, and the only thing that prevented it from crushing him completely was the cutlass Daniel had shoved up under its jaw. Thick blood was drooling from its maw, dripping down on Daniel, and he made a sound of disgust.
Feeling Daniel beneath it, hearing his voice, there was no way the Ursa could miss him. It half rolled off him, and its flailing talons threatened to cut him to pieces.
And then the paw went flying, severed from the arm by Xin, who let out a cry of triumph as she swung her cutlass again and this time cut off the arm completely at the shoulder joint. Even as that happened, Martes charged forward and, disdaining to use his weapon, instead plowed into the Ursa like a linebacker. It knocked the creature clear of Daniel, and Xin and Martes quickly helped him to his feet. His legs almost gave way but he managed to maintain his footing. He gasped deeply for breath, and it took long moments for him to steady himself.
“I’m fine, I’m fine,” he said brusquely. Then he informed Freed over his comm unit that they had killed the Ursa but had two Rangers down.
Within minutes they were being evacuated to Ranger headquarters. Ephraim was, of course, dead on arrival. Bastante managed to live three more hours before succumbing.
Daniel was at both their funerals. He kept his gaze level, his jaw stiff, and he spoke to no one for a solid week.
And when he finally did speak, it was to Martes, and it was only three words.
“Let’s go drink.”
Martes was happy to oblige.
VIII
“Hey, don’t I know you?”
The bartender stared at the white-clad Ranger, seated next to another Ranger. The white-clad man had short hair, was clean-shaven, and had a look of quiet confidence about him. When the Ranger didn’t reply immediately, the bartender said again, “Don’t I know you?”
Daniel looked him squarely in the eyes. “No,” he said softly, nursing his drink. “No,
you don’t.”
The bartender’s eyes narrowed; he clearly felt he was missing something that he should have been picking up on. Then he shrugged to himself and moved down the bar to attend to another customer.
Martes looked sidelong at Daniel. “Okay, where’s he know you from?”
“Here. I used to be a bouncer here.”
“A bouncer? You’re kidding.”
“I used to be a lot of things.”
They had another drink and then Daniel decided he’d had enough of the place. He’d returned to that bar as much for personal amusement as anything else, but the novelty had worn off. “Let’s get out of here.”
“You got it, boss.”
They slid off the bar stools and headed toward the door, emerging into the cool darkness of the Nova Prime night. As they started to walk away, a startled voice said, “Daniel? Is that—?”
He turned and, sure enough, there was Ronna. Her hair was shorter than he’d remembered, and she looked a bit more haggard, but otherwise she was more or less the same. Her eyes widened in astonishment. “My God, it is you. I thought I was … oh my God! You’re a Ranger?”
“Sweetheart,” said Martes, clamping a hand on Daniel’s shoulder, “I’ll have you know he is the Ranger. And who are—?” Then he saw the look in Daniel’s eyes, the silent warning. “You’re kidding. This is her?”
Daniel didn’t have to reply to him; the answer was on his face.
“So … Ronna … how have you been?”
“Been okay. I guess.”
He realized she wasn’t looking him in the eyes. “Really?”
“Not really, no,” she admitted. “I’ve been in and out of a few relationships, and, well …” She shrugged.
“They weren’t going anywhere?”
She looked down. “I guess I deserved that. The truth is, lately I’ve been thinking about that night. You know: that night. And how terrible I was to you. And I was wondering if you’re, y’know … busy? Maybe we could go somewhere and talk?”