I didn’t like talking about myself. There was nothing interesting in my past I wanted to share. But he was right—I had to give him some background, no matter how unpleasant doing so was.
“I grew up in Australia. My real parents died in a car accident. The people who raised me are also no longer with us. I have no siblings, as far as I’m aware anyway.” Nick’s face softened when he heard my words. Was he sympathizing with me? I didn’t need his commiseration and pity. So I quickly added, “I’m divorced and have no kids. And you?” I wanted to make him think about something other than my boring past.
His hand gently tucked a lock of hair behind my ear. “As it is universally known, I’m not married. My mother is American, and my father is Swiss. I have a teenage sister. I’m sure she’ll be in seventh heaven when she sees you.” His faced beamed, filled with love. “Is there anything you don’t like eating? I need to know that, since I intend to tell my parents you’re living with me.”
I knew nothing about Nicholas Frey, so there was a distinct possibility that I’d mess everything up. Still, I hoped I’d be able to handle the situation.
I wanted to help him.
I wanted to be with him.
I was playing with fire and could get seriously burned. So I had to do everything I could to prevent myself from investing strong emotions in our so-called relationship.
Fake relationship. I needed to keep repeating that to myself.
“I eat everything. I love cooking. I like listening to retro music. One of my favorite songs is Dear Darlin’—”
“By Olly Murs?” he interrupted me, and a smile appeared on his face.
Dear God, what a smile. For another one like it, I’d lie about our relationship not just to his parents, but to the entire world.
“Yes, that song is so beautiful and melodic,” I answered in surprise. I’d thought I was the only weirdo who listened to music from thirty years ago.
“So you’re a romantic.”
“You could say that.” I looked out of the window. I felt too exposed.
You’re unlikely to have impressed him. My subconscious furrowed its eyebrows in disapproval.
I didn’t think I could impress him anyway. I felt like a nobody, like a simple, plain girl who’d only been living life to the full for one year. Nicholas Frey was the one who elicited people’s admiration. His pictures adorned all major newspapers and magazines. He charmed not only with his immaculate appearance, which made any woman wet her panties, but also with his incredible intelligence and resourcefulness.
“I don’t see anything bad in that, Estelle. On the contrary, it’s wonderful and, unfortunately, extremely rare these days. People only care about money and their career, and I regretfully admit that I fall into that category. We have simply forgotten to appreciate the beautiful things in life.”
Nick took hold of my chin and gently moved it so I’d look at him. He leaned in and kissed me. His lips were divine—soft and thick. His hand slid along the inside of my thigh. He got about halfway up to his destination, and just when I thought he’d touch me where no man had touched me for two years…he stopped.
The disappointment must’ve been written on my face. I was no good at hiding my emotions.
“I’d love to fuck you right here and right now, Estelle.” His warm breath caressed my face. “I won’t pretend otherwise. I’m very attracted to you. But I won’t do it. First, because we don’t have time for what I have in mind. And second, because you haven’t given me your consent.”
3
Nick
Estelle turned out to be great, emotional… A beautiful, tender flower that, in spite of its horrible past, had managed to remain pure.
She wasn’t a materialist. If I’d requested some other woman to accompany me, she would’ve asked me back how much I’d pay her for the service. Or she would’ve wanted to sleep with me. There were almost no women who didn’t think about how they could benefit from associating with me. To most, material satisfaction came first.
Little Miss Klide didn’t ask for anything in return.
She turned out to be different.
Even though the flight was short, I managed to learn a lot about her. She was easy-going, quiet, a little shy. Or was she simply nervous around me? I wasn’t too sure. But I’d find out pretty damn soon.
I wanted to know everything about her.
But I hadn’t had the foggiest that her past was so shocking.
A past I’d never suspected that someone like her could survive in one piece.
* * *
Holding hands, Estelle and I entered the hospital room where my mother was staying. April, my sister, and my father were also there. My heart still hadn’t come to rest after the conversation I’d had with her attending physician. Her condition was not to be underestimated. We had to protect her from stress and overexcitement.
My mother, Tina Frey, was an extremely strong woman, but very emotional to boot. She took everything to heart. My parents’ marriage was stable and peaceful, but their ambitions had always been too great. They’d worked from dusk till dawn at their insurance firm in order to realize their dream of building a house by Lake Lugano. And by the time I’d turned fifteen, they’d already managed to build it.
I was no different from them – I’d inherited my strong ambition to succeed from both of them. No matter how many times I’d told them not to overwork themselves, they’d continued to do it even though they could’ve retired early and lived very nicely off my earnings. When I’d suggested they do so, they’d said that until I settled down and gave them a grandchild, they wouldn’t sell their business.
Seeing my mother so pale, lying on the bed, dark rings around her beautiful, but now really tired eyes, I told myself I was doing the right thing. Fake relationship or not, the news that I’d finally found a serious girlfriend really cheered her up. The smile she gave Estelle and the happy expression on her face were worth any lie.
“Nick, you’ve had a serious girlfriend for three months without saying a single word. How could you? I’m so glad to meet you, dear Estelle,” Tina said and went to get up, but Roger, my father, gently put his hand on her shoulder to stop her.
“The doctors said you need to lie down and rest, Tina. I won’t let you disobey their orders.” His words were stern, but his voice was soft. He really loved my mother. They’d been married for thirty two years, worked together all day long and, in spite of that, still weren’t bored of each other. That must be what people mean when they talk about true love.
If someone were to ask me, I couldn’t describe what it was, because I hadn’t experienced it yet.
But that changed very quickly.
Sweet Miss Klide took my mother’s hand, smiled warmly and said, “I’m sure you know full well that Nick doesn’t like to talk about his personal life.” She was really getting into playing the part of my girlfriend. That thought made me smile a little.
“Clearly, you’ve also gotten to know him well,” Tina replied with a smile and leaned her head forward to fix her pillow.
Embracing Estelle, I kissed her on the temple. But if you think I only did it for show, you’re dead wrong. I needed to hug her, to hold her in my arms. No matter how weird it sounds, her fine scent had a calming effect on me.
“Will you have a baby soon?” April blurted out, and my mother chided her.
“Asking such questions is not the done thing, my child. It’s not—”
“Child? I’m not a child anymore, Mum,” April said poutily and wound a lock of her golden hair around her finger.
She was a whole eighteen years younger than me. After I’d chosen to study in the States, my parents had decided that they didn’t want to be alone and had made my sister. She was born in April and thus christened with the most fitting and beautiful name for the small, blonde, mischievous angel who I loved very much in spite of her bratty character.
“If we’re going to have a baby, you’ll be the first to know,” I joked with her, w
hile my father was trying and failing to contain his smile.
“Yeah, right, you’re just saying that. You never tell me anything.” My sister’s pout became even more marked. “You’ve been promising to take me to New York for two years now. They have so many cool designer stores there. I want to buy a Chanel bag—”
“Aren’t you a bit young for that—” my father interjected, but was also unable to finish his sentence.
“Dad, when will you get it through your head? I’m big now.”
My mother rolled her eyes all the way up to the ceiling, but refrained from making a comment.
April continued unabated, “Estelle has designer clothes too, and—”
“But Estelle is not a child,” my father and I replied in unison.
April was a very good girl, but like every teenager, wanted to grow up in one day and do whatever she wanted.
“You can come visit me in the summer holidays and I’ll take you shopping. I’ll buy you shoes, bags, dresses… Just don’t forget to bring an extra empty suitcase.”
“Oh my God, that’d be so amazing. Meike will turn green with envy.” April clapped her hands in delight.
She was wearing a pink top with a Hello Kitty print. Even though she saw herself as grown, she didn’t have the heart to part with her favorite cartoon heroes and hordes of stuffed toys and Barbie dolls.
“Who’s Meike?” I enquired.
My sister raised her arms behind her head and tightened her ponytail.
“This nasty girl from school. She thinks she’s the prettiest in the world,” she answered disdainfully, wrinkling her small snub nose.
I laughed and said, “Why do I get the feeling you want designer clothes to get a rise out of her?”
“That’s not true,” April countered defensively.
This was what we, the Freys, were like—we argued, interrupted each other… We weren’t perfect, but we loved and supported each other, and that’s what really mattered.
My sister, who’d been sitting on the side of the bed, suddenly jumped up and hugged Estelle. “We’ll go shopping while Nick goes to work.”
Estelle stroked her blonde hair and gave her a smile that revealed her white teeth. “But I’ll be at work too. We’ll only be free on the weekends and in the evenings, after work.”
My sister refused to give up. “But if you marry my brother, you won’t have to work. He’s really rich. So we’ll be able to shop, watch movies, and eat popcorn all day long. It’ll be so great.”
My mother decided it was high time she intervened. “Nick, please don’t spoil her. She needs to learn the value of money.” She pulled the cover over her chest and then quickly changed the subject. “They’re discharging me tomorrow. I hope you can stay a little longer.”
I was swamped with work, but couldn’t leave my mother. Not under these circumstances. I’d already decided to work from home and be with her until she recovered. I hoped a week would do it.
“Don’t worry about that,” I said, trying to assuage her concerns.
Tina sighed deeply and pursed her lips. “It’d be so nice if you lived near us.”
“Mum, let’s not debate this sore point right now.” Talking about that always made her sad. It really pained her that we lived in different continents. She was in Europe and I was in America. Fortunately, she had April as a solace. What’s more, transatlantic flights took only thirty minutes in my super-fast airplanes, much shorter than the time lost at check-in and passport control.
“The doctor said I should take it easy, so it might be time we sat down and seriously considered selling the insurance business.” Tina looked at my father and smiled at him. He quickly responded by caressing her face with the back of his hand. “We’ll then have time to visit you more often. But I need to get better first.”
Leaning toward her, I kissed her pale forehead.
It was good that she’d decided to rethink her life.
4
Estelle
After we left the hospital, we went to have dinner at a nice restaurant in the old quarter of Lugano. I was ravenous, so that might’ve impaired my judgment, but the calzone I ordered was the most delicious I’d ever tasted in my life.
I allowed myself to drink more wine than I normally would have. I knew the alcohol would relax me and make it easier to pass myself off as Nicholas Frey’s girlfriend. Not that I had anything against his holding my hand, hugging me, and kissing me. In fact, I have to admit that the entire experience made me melt on the inside.
But it shouldn’t have.
Because the love he gave me wasn’t real.
Still, that couldn’t stop me from liking him. Dressed in black jeans and a black V-neck T-shirt, Nick was simply gorgeous. His masculinity was so highly palpable that he overshadowed all other men I’d met in my life.
I adored putting my palm on his biceps and sliding my fingers down the smooth golden skin of his arm. The butterflies in my stomach fluttered whenever he glanced at me. His eyes, brown with a smattering of yellow specks, had a slightly feline shape, and his eyelashes were long and curved. His hairstyle was modern—short sides with longer backcombed hair on top.
I couldn’t resist the temptation and ran my fingers along his silky locks. April teased us that we were stuck like two pieces of Velcro. But we just laughed off her comment and continued to be tactile with each other.
At ten, we went back to the house of Nick’s parents. It was built on one of the hills around the lake and had a stunning view of the city, which shone brightly in the dark, as if covered in millions of crystals.
We said goodnight to his father and sister and retired to Nick’s one-time bedroom.
With every step I took, it was like I absorbed more and more of Nicholas Frey’s childhood world—filled with pictures and model aircraft scattered all over the room.
“My mother won’t let me change a thing about the room. Since I left home thirteen years ago, only the walls have been repainted. The only thing I managed to negotiate was a bigger bed.” Nick smiled and came over to me.
I thought about how different his childhood must’ve been from mine. While he’d grown up in a family that had surrounded him with love, I’d lived a life full of fear and deprivation.
“Well, I like the room. It’s big, light, welcoming, and typically boyish. I wish I had one like it.”
“What? A boyish room?” Nick asked, making a face. I laughed and gently elbowed him in the ribs.
“Don’t be silly. I meant such a spacious one.”
Our eyes met, and it was like the air had been sucked out of the room.
Driven by instinct, our bodies pressed against each other. He dug his hands into my hair and pressed his lips against mine. We began to kiss passionately, banging our teeth together until we found the right fit. Our tongues met each other and started to dance, making my loins contract painfully in desire. We moaned simultaneously.
Nick pulled away from our kiss, and it was like I’d lost a part of my own body. I felt pain and, at the same time, passion of an intensity I’d never experienced before.
This man had lit a fire inside me.
He made me want to give myself to him, merge with him and forget about everything else, if only for a short while.
“I won’t lie to you, Estelle—I’m so attracted to you, it’s scary,” he said in a deep and hoarse voice. “I want you so fucking bad, but I won’t press on unless you want it too.” Painfully slow, his thumb traced the outline of my lower lip.
All I had to say were three simple words—I want you—and he’d be mine. Even if only for tonight.
There was a risk I’d fall in love with him, and that would destroy me. But I had to take the chance. I had to find out what it meant to spend a night rolling between the sheets with a man like Nicholas Frey.
A fraction of a second after I heard myself whisper those words, his powerful arms embraced me again, and his lips slid along my neck. I threw my head back to give him better access while my hands
pawed at his T-shirt, trying to pull it off. He helped me take it off. A wonderful view appeared before me—wide shoulders, bulging pecs and biceps, and a six-pack to boot…
Good heavens. This man was sheer perfection.
Nick tilted his head and smiled. “Now it’s my turn to enjoy the view. Turn around,” he ordered, and I obeyed.
The zip of the blouse I was wearing came undone painfully slowly. I had the feeling he was doing it on purpose to stoke my desire.
His hot breath washed over me in waves when he uttered, “You’re divine, Estelle.”
The next second, my blouse landed on the chair by his desk. It was quickly followed by my bra. His big and wide hands cupped my breasts and began to massage them skillfully. His teeth dug into my earlobe, making me let out a loud moan.
“You need to be quiet. Do you think you can do that?” I nodded slightly in reply. I couldn’t see his face, but knew he was smiling. Nicholas Frey knew full well what kind of effect he had on women.
A wide palm slid across my belly and undid my jeans’ button and zip. His playful fingers entered my panties, and before I knew it, his middle finger was inside me.
“You’re so wet…for me.” He started to move it in and out, sending tingles throughout my body.
I couldn’t take it any longer. I wanted him madly, deeply, and immediately. My skin was moist in yearning for him. “Please. I want you.”
Nick pulled his finger out of me and licked it. “I knew you’d taste incredible.” He squatted and dug his face between my legs, inhaling deeply. “Your scent is divine, Estelle.”
Slowly and painfully, he took off my jeans and panties and then flung them on the chair. He stood up and leaned over my breasts. His teeth sank into my hard right nipple, his lips sucking on it at the same time. I dug my hands into his hair and threw my head back, savoring the sensation.
He did the same to my left breast; nibbled my soft flesh to tease me. My nipples became erect and pointy.
He picked me up and carried me to the bedroom. Gently, he laid me on the mattress and positioned himself over me, his hands and thighs on both sides of my body. His lips found mine and he began to kiss me impatiently. My fingers quickly found the buttons of his jeans. I undid them and pulled his boxers down. My hands grasped his rock-hard cock.