Six months after the incident in Leonora’s bedroom, Alex was admitted to a mental institution called Nordvang, where she stayed for six weeks under Dr. Winter’s supervision. When she came back, her brother hardly recognized her. She wouldn’t talk to him, and if he approached her, she would hiss like a cat and pretend to want to scratch him with her nails. It troubled him deeply, and he felt like he had lost her. She was doped up on medication, and seemed to have slipped even further into a world of her own.
He started to fear her slightly, and stayed out of her way. Their parents hid anything she could use to cut herself: knives, scissors, and razorblades. At night, she would scream even louder than before, and this time not because she was sad, but she screamed like a crazy person. One night, when she screamed like that, her brother crawled up to her in her bed like he always did when she cried at night. Only this time, he wasn’t welcome any longer. Alex was sitting up in the bed, her hair hanging down in front of her face. She was holding a pair of scissors in her hand, using them to cut into her fingers. Blood was dripping on the sheets.
“What are you doing?” he asked, terrified. “You’re not allowed to have these. How did you get those scissors? Give them to me. You’re hurting yourself.”
But Alex didn’t hand them over. She looked at her brother through the long hair with contempt, her piercing blue eyes cutting through his bones. Then, she lifted the scissors in the air and pierced them through his right hand, nailing it to the rail.
42
IT WAS late before I made it home. I had dropped David off at his hotel and thanked him for all his help. After getting all the pictures we could, standing under an umbrella in the rain, and talking to Officer Pedersen, who was on the scene as usual, we went back to the office and I had written the story about the young lawyer who had been found killed in her own apartment. The police still wouldn’t tell me if it had anything to do with the other four recent killings in our small town, but I had a feeling it did. Officer Henrik Pedersen had told me, without getting into details, that it was ugly. We had waited for hours in the darkness outside the apartment complex to see the body being taken away, and even though it was covered up on the stretcher, an arm fell down, and I could tell she was wearing a suit with cufflinks. Being a lawyer, it wasn’t that odd, but I had a feeling this wasn’t what she had been wearing at the office. I didn’t mention anything in the article, since it was all guessing, but I was determined to find out the very next day.
With Sune’s help.
I yawned and parked the car in the driveway, then looked at my watch. It was almost midnight. I hadn’t been home this late in many months. I just hoped everything had been all right with the kids. I couldn’t wait to spend a calm weekend with my family. Hopefully, the killer would take a break as well.
As I came closer to the house, I could hear voices coming from inside. Agitated voices, and I wondered what was going on. I could suddenly hear children’s voices, yelling and screaming loudly.
Are the children still up?
I grabbed the door handle and swung the door open. The yelling got louder, and I hurried to the living room, where I found all of them in front of the big screen TV playing X-box. Julie, Tobias, Sune, Jeppe, and…William?
I stared, baffled, at all of them. Julie saw me and ran towards me. She was literally paler than the white shirt she was wearing.
“Mom! You’re home.” She walked over empty pizza boxes, hugged me, and Sune paused the game.
“Hi, Rebekka,” he said.
William was sitting on the floor, playing with his blocks, looking like he was on speed…with his eyes wide open and smiling.
Sune approached me and kissed me. I stared at him, not knowing what to say to not sound like his mother.
“Do you have any idea what time it is?” I asked.
Sune shrugged. “Yeah, I know it’s kind of late. But it’s Friday, and we were having so much fun. We can sleep in tomorrow.”
“Sleep in? Are you kidding me? William is not even two years old and you expect him to sleep in? He can’t stay up till midnight!”
Sune took a step backwards. “Whoa. Have you looked at him? He’s having the time of his life. Need I remind you that he is my son too, and I say he is doing just fine?”
My hands were shaking in anger, and I had nowhere to put it. How could he be so irresponsible? I mean, I knew Sune was just a kid, and that every now and then, he did things in ways I never would, but this was over the top. This was simply too much for me to bear. I stared at Jeppe, who started the game again.
“Could you maybe tell your friend that the party is over and that he has to leave?” I asked Sune. “We have a child that wakes up at six in the morning, and tomorrow he is going to be a pain in the neck because he’s so tired.”
Jeppe put the console down and put his hands in the air. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’ll leave right away.” He smiled and approached me. “I really am sorry, Rebekka, if I caused any trouble. I guess time just slipped. We were having a lot of fun. I didn’t mean to…I mean, I just enjoy their company so much. I feel alone every now and then. You have such a beautiful family.”
It was so strange, looking at this guy that resembled Sune so much with the Mohawk and spiked leather band. He smiled gently, and I couldn’t stay mad at him. This wasn’t his fault, after all. It was Sune who was the father; he was supposed to be the responsible one. Jeppe hadn’t done anything wrong, for all I knew.
“It’s okay,” I said. “It’s just been a long day, that’s all.”
“I’ll leave you to get some sleep then,” Jeppe said, and grabbed his jacket from the back of my dad’s favorite recliner.
“Thanks for helping me today,” Sune yelled after him. Jeppe waved and then left.
Sune looked angry at me. “Why do you have to embarrass me like this every time I spend time with Jeppe?”
Was he kidding me?
“Embarrass you?” I asked, sensing I was about to explode. “How about how you’re treating me? I asked you to pick up the children…”
“And I did. I picked them up, walked all the way down there, even though it started to rain on our way back. Luckily, Jeppe was able to pick us up and get us home. Otherwise, we’d been soaking wet. I do everything you tell me to, just not always the way you want it done. You are so controlling, and want everyone to do everything the way you think it’s supposed to be done. But I got news for you. It doesn’t have to be like that. Sometimes, a good father is someone who plays with his kids, and not someone who does everything by the book of Rebekka!”
“You know what?” I said.
Julie cleared her throat. I turned to look at her. I had completely forgotten that they were still in the room. She pointed at William, who had fallen asleep on top of his blocks.
“He passed out,” she said. “Do you want me to take him up to his room and tuck him in?”
I was overwhelmed with guilt. “I’m sorry,” I said, and grabbed William from the floor. Tobias stared at me with tears in his eyes. Julie followed my every move closely.
“Are you guys breaking up?” she asked.
The question surprised me. I shook my head, then grabbed her and hugged her tightly.
“No, sweetie. We’re just having an argument. Just like you and Tobias sometimes argue, right Sune?”
I turned to look at him. He smiled and approached the children. I signaled to Tobias to come closer, and then hugged him as well. Sune put his long arms around all of us.
“We’re a family now,” he said. “Families disagree, but they stick together through it.”
I smiled and leaned over and kissed Sune to show the children we still loved each other. The kiss felt forced, but that didn’t matter. I kissed Julie, then Tobias on their cheeks.
“We’ll be fine, okay guys? Takes more than a small argument to tear us apart,” I said. “Now, it’s time for bed, you two. It’s way past your bedtime.”
“Let me tuck them in,” Sune said, and took Wil
liam out of my hands. “Don’t worry. I got it. You open a bottle of wine. It is, after all, Friday.”
43
IT HAD been a while since we had enjoyed each other’s company as much as we did that night. Sune and I stayed up till two o’clock and talked and drank red wine like we used to do on Friday nights. We even snuck out at one point and smoked a cigarette on the patio like two teenagers.
“I missed this,” I said, sitting on his lap in my dad’s patio swing.
Sune grabbed the cigarette out of my hand and smoked it. “Me too,” he said. “I miss being us and doing silly stuff together. Life can get too serious sometimes, you know?”
I nodded pensively. He was right. I had become too tense and too hung up on doing things properly. There was no room for just playing and doing things differently. After all, it was hardly going to harm any of the kids that they had stayed up late. It would likely do more harm for them to see us fight like that and to see their mother get angry. Maybe I had overreacted after all. Maybe I had been slightly jealous. They had just been hanging out having fun, while I had to work. And on top of it, I was on a case that was so creepy. It was so sad about what had happened to that girl.
“So, I’ve been thinking,” Sune said, and handed me back the cigarette.
I smoked. “Yeah? About what?”
“About us. I think it’s time we get our own place.”
I froze. Not again? I hated when he brought that up. “I have to think about my father,” I said.
“I know,” Sune said. “But we have to think about ourselves as well. It’s bothering me, having to live in your dad’s house, constantly feeling like I have to be grateful to him, like I can’t take care of my own family. It’s getting to me.”
I looked into Sune’s eyes. I could tell he was being very serious. I couldn’t blame him for wanting this. It made sense that it was bothering him. On top of everything, he was hardly making any money these days, since he hadn’t had that many assignments for other magazines, and what he made off of Zeeland Times was hardly enough. It hurt his pride that I, on top of being the oldest, also supported the family, and we all lived in my dad’s house. I caressed his cheek gently.
“I’m sorry, babe. I haven’t been attentive enough to your needs,” I said. “I think I get it. You want to be the man of the house.”
Sune grabbed the cigarette from my fingers again. He smiled and nodded. “Something like that. Not quite as old-fashioned as you make it sound, but I guess that is it. I want us to be like a real family.”
I shrugged. “I guess we could afford it.”
Sune offered me the rest of the cigarette, but I shook my head. I didn’t want anymore. He smiled and killed it under his shoe.
“Well, I guess that’s it,” he said. “The decision is made.”
I felt a huge knot in my stomach, thinking about my dad. It would absolutely kill him to not have us around. Maybe if we found something really close by? It was time. Sune was right about that. I just wasn’t sure I was ready.
Sune grabbed my face and pulled me close, then kissed me gently. I closed my eyes and enjoyed it. This time, it didn’t feel forced at all. This time, we were both into it. He grabbed me and lifted me up, then carried me towards the door. I felt so small in his arms. I could tell he enjoyed taking charge.
Sune carried me all the way to our bedroom upstairs. He threw me on the bed. He pulled off my pants, then kissed the inner side of my thighs. I closed my eyes and enjoyed his touches. We hadn’t been intimate like this for months, not since before the incident in the mines. I simply hadn’t been well enough for it, and Sune had known to give me the time and space I needed. But now, it felt good. It felt right. We made love like we had just met, and somehow, in the darkness, we found each other again. At least for a little while.
We fell asleep afterwards, and about an hour later I woke up. Exactly what woke me up, I don’t know, but I opened my eyes and realized someone was in our bedroom. I gasped and stared at the man in front of me.
When my eyes met his, he turned around and rushed out of the bedroom.
Then I screamed.
44
“WHAT’S GOING ON!?”
Sune jumped up from his pillow.
“What’s happening, Rebekka? Why are you screaming?”
“It was him. He was here…He was watching us in our sleep, Sune.”
“What are you talking about? Who was?” Sune asked.
“Him! Jeppe! He was here. In our bedroom.”
Sune shook his head. “What the heck are you talking about? There’s no one here?”
“He ran out the door. He might still be in the house. How did he get in the house, Sune?”
Sune grabbed me by the shoulders and looked me in the eyes. “There’s no one here. There never was. You were just dreaming.”
I shook my head in frustration. “No, Sune. He was there. I saw him. He was standing right over there by the door. And he was looking at us. It scared the crap out of me. What if he is still in the house?”
“Okay. Okay. I’ll go check and see if anyone is here, if that will make you feel better. I still believe it was just a very vivid dream,” he said, while putting on his pants.
Sune left and I walked to the door to listen in if something happened to him. I knew Tobias had a baseball bat in his room in case I needed it. Sune stumbled around downstairs before he came back up again.
“Like I said, there’s no one there.”
“Did you check the front door? Was it locked?” I asked.
Was it just a dream? No, he was there. I saw him. I did. I know I did.
“Yes, it was locked. So was the back door. No windows were open. No one could have come in here. Now, can we please just go back to sleep?”
“He was here, Sune. I’m not making it up. I swear. He was standing right in the corner. The door was open. It was him, Sune. It really was.”
I could tell he didn’t believe me. He shook his head and we walked back into the bedroom. “It was a dream, Rebekka. I’m sure it felt very real in the moment, but it wasn’t. Trust me. Why would Jeppe come into our bedroom and look at us? Give me one reason?”
“Because he’s creepy?” I said.
Sune laughed. “You think Jeppe is creepy?”
“A little. I mean, the whole look-alike thing is kind of creepy.”
Sune put his arm around my shoulder and laughed again. “You’ve been working on too many murder cases, my dear. Jeppe is just a nice guy, trying hard to be our friend. That’s all. Now, can we get some sleep? I’m beat.”
We went back to bed, but it took a long time before I finally fell asleep. I kept looking at the door and wondering if he would come back. I still wasn’t convinced that it was just a dream. How could it be? He was there.
Finally, I gave in and dozed off. A few hours later, I woke to the sound of William crying. I rushed into his room and picked him up. He needed a clean diaper. I changed him, then walked downstairs to make him breakfast. It was still dark outside at six o’clock, and I felt like I was the only one awake in the entire nation.
After his breakfast, I took William to the living room, where he played with blocks for an hour or so, while I dozed off on the couch. Then, Julie and Tobias woke up and came downstairs. My dad followed them, holding onto his cane.
“I’ll fix you all some breakfast,” I said, and got up from the couch.
“You look awful,” Julie said, as I put bread in the toaster.
My dad nodded. “Yes, you do look terrible, Rebekka. Have you slept at all?”
“Well, not much, I have to admit.” The toast popped up, and I buttered it.
My dad looked at Julie and Tobias. “What do you say we give your mom some sleep, huh? We can take care of William for a few hours, can’t we?”
“Yup,” Julie said.
Tobias nodded.
My dad chuckled. “Go, dear. Go get your beauty sleep.”
Needless to say, he didn’t have to say that twice.
>
45
THE WEEKEND ended up being good for all of us. We spend both Saturday and Sunday in the comfort of our living room, playing board games and even the X-box. I finally gave in and let the kids show me how to play. To my surprise, I ended up liking it. Jens-Ole was happy with my articles in Saturday’s paper, and didn’t even call me once during the entire weekend.
I couldn’t quite shake the experience of seeing Jeppe in our bedroom, but decided it wasn’t something I wanted to argue with Sune about. I decided he was right, and to let it go. It had to have been a dream. Anything else would be too strange. And, yes, Jeppe was a little odd, but not that odd.
On Sunday afternoon, Sune asked me if it would be all right if he invited Jeppe over to play with us. At first, I wasn’t sure I liked the idea, mainly because I really enjoyed being just us, but then I gave in. Jeppe came over and he and Sune watched a soccer game, while the kids and I played Monopoly. My dad had been with us most of the day, but now he decided to go back to bed.
I stared at Jeppe, while he and Sune chatted amicably and drank their beers. They talked about soccer and players, and all that stuff that didn’t interest me one bit. I tried to imagine him standing in our bedroom staring at me, but it somehow felt wrong now. It couldn’t have been real, could it? He didn’t seem so creepy, now that I was looking at him. He seemed so sweet all of a sudden. Plus, he made Sune happy. I had to learn to accept him as a part of his life.
“It’s your turn, Mom,” Julie said.
I grabbed the dice and threw it, when I heard William cry. I got up. “William is awake from his nap,” I said. “I have to go and get him.”
I walked up the stairs and into William’s bedroom. He was standing up in his bed and crying. I grabbed him in my arms and hugged him, then took him to the changing table and put him down.
“Now there…no more need to cry. Let’s get this dirty diaper off, shall we?”