"You never really explained how you and James escaped."
"Well, after your grandda's coach hied away, I think everyone kind of forgot what the riot had been about. Most were just fighting for the pure fun of it." Gilly's guilty expression revealed that he had not been above such feelings himself. "We were doing just fine until that scurvy sailor stuck his knife into Lethington. By that time, the constables had arrived, and the old fools only added to the confusion. I snatched someone's horse and-"
He broke off with a grimace of disgust, "And would you believe that damn fool James didn't want to take it? And himself dripping blood all over the road? These English with their law-abiding notions are so cursed impractical."
He concluded cheerfully, "Now I expect we'll both be strung up for horse-" Gilly looked away with an embarrassed flush. "Um ... sorry, Fae. A poor jest."
"It is all right," she said, giving her cousin a fierce hug. "I promise I won't be turning the pair of you rogues in." But when she became serious and tried to thank Gilly for what he had done for James, he would have none of it.
"I could not let him die in the street.” Gilly fixed his gaze upon her, his face growing stern. "And now, my girl, you’ll be telling me what sort of mischief you were about last night."
Although she could not meet his eyes, Phaedra made no attempt to lie. "I was going to run away with James."
Gilly sucked in his breath. "You were just fixing to disappear without one word to me-"
"Please, Gilly." She stopped him, unable to bear the raw hurt that laced his voice. "I am sorry. Don't be scolding me or upsetting yourself. I am going nowhere." She added in accents of despair, "It is truly finished now."
She walked away from him to stare out at the night settling over the rooftops of the city. "I am more likely to find myself standing in the dock than on the deck of a ship. When they come to arrest my grandfather-"
"No!" Gilly came up behind her to grip her shoulders. "You're not making any foolish confessions, even if I have to lock you up myself. I know you are feeling guilty. Let that be your punishment. Jonathan has seen to a temporary stay of the orders since it seems most unlikely the old man will ever rise from his bed again."
Phaedra buried her face in her hands. "James has destroyed my grandfather. And I helped him to do it."
"I don't know as how you think it is your fault or his. If the old man had slunk quietly away until this was sorted out, he would yet be unharmed."
Gilly tried to pull her into his arms, but she shoved away from him. She was beyond any sort of comfort now.
"My Goodfellow papers," she said. "I believe that James took them and gave them to Jessym to incriminate my grandfather."
Haltingly, Phaedra told Gilly all that had transpired since he had left her at the Heath. She related James's version of the murder and his suspicions that Sawyer Weylin had participated in a conspiracy, first to destroy Julianna, then silence James; and how she had tried to stop James from seeking vengeance, an effort that had obviously failed.
"I thought to save James," she concluded miserably. "But I was years too late."
Gilly stroked his fingers along her temple. "If it is any comfort at all to you, Fae, I do believe James loves you. I watched him through the night. He even speaks your name in his sleep."
Gilly flinched at the memory. "I hope to never hear such cries of despair again, not even after I descend into hell-which I likely will, someday."
"I realize he loves me, Gilly," she said wearily. "But his hatred is stronger. Perhaps it is as well our elopement was thwarted. I can see now I was making a bitter mistake."
"What a blasted tangle." Gilly rubbed the back of his neck."But perhaps there is yet some way that you and James can mend-"
“No.” She shook her head. "Whatever happens, I will stay and take care of my grandfather. I owe him that much. He is the one who needs me the most."
Gilly looked as though he did not agree with her, but he kept his lips sealed. Phaedra left him, tiptoeing across the hall to slip softly into James's room. Gilly was right. James's color was improved, and he was sound asleep. But she would never have described it as resting easy.
Even in sleep, his brow appeared pinched with pained remembrance. She touched his forehead, longing to soothe away the tension. But he stirred restlessly, turning away from her.Fearful of waking him, she retreated quietly from the room.
With a heavy heart, she went next to where her grandfather lay in Jonathan's room. Jonathan, ever faithful in his vigil, had fallen asleep in a wing-backed chair. Phaedra skirted silently past him to the bedside. As she looked down at the old man, remorse tore at her.
His bald head was swathed in bandages, his once-ruddy features ashen. Phaedra expected to find him asleep and was startled to see him staring up at her. His eyes were dulled, and she glimpsed no recognition in their depths. He strained to speak.
"Wh-wh ... "
As she bent closer, she realized he was asking for a drink. She fetched a small quantity of brandy in a glass. Raising his head, she held the goblet to his lips. He sipped, choked, but managed to swallow some of the liquid. It appeared to help. As she eased him back onto the pillow, his eyes cleared. Frowning, he focused upon her.
"Dying," he said.
"No, Grandfather," she protested.
He managed to lift one hand, indicating that she should be silent, the gesture still rife with his impatience.
"Tell someone in-in case. Someone must know."
She tucked the sheets more snugly about him. "You will have plenty of time to tell me whatever it is later."
"No! Must tell now."
He was becoming agitated; Phaedra saw she would have to humor him.
"Other day you were asking me ..." His voice trailed off.
Phaedra waited patiently for him to continue, but when he did, the words he gasped took her by surprise.
"Lethington girl."
"Julianna?" Phaedra tensed. When he lapsed into silence, she prodded, "Is it something to do with her death?"
His jowls quivered as he moved his head in a barely perceptible shake.
"Julianna Lethington," he repeated in a hoarse whisper. "She's alive. I know where she is."
Chapter Twenty-one
Phaedra touched a hand to her grandfather’s cheek, fearing to find him feverish. But his beard-stubbled flesh felt cool. She could only suppose the blow had addled the old man's wits.
"You mean you know where Julianna is buried," she said.
Weylin caught her wrist with surprising strength, pulling her closer. "Not buried. Alive. Girl is alive." Then he released her, closing his eyes as though the effort had been too much for him.
It was all Phaedra could do not to shake him. "Grandfather?"
At her sharp cry, his eyes fluttered open. "Never meant to hurt her. Carleton said we would only abduct girl ... keep her away until Ewan married you." Tears glinted in the old man's eyes as he paused for breath.
"Should not have trusted Carleton alone with the girl He ravished her. I tried to stop him. Too late. Girl went mad, lost her memory. Carleton wanted to kill her but I locked her in the garret."
"The garret," Phaedra repeated, unable to believe what she was hearing. So that was how the shepherdess had come to be left there. Julianna must have dropped it during her imprisonment. All the while James had engaged in his life and death struggle with Lord Carleton, his sister had been much closer than he ever realized.
"And then, Grandfather?" she asked. "You obviously did not keep her in the attic forever. Where is Julianna now?"
Her grandfather's eyes hazed. She feared he meant to drift into unconsciousness without telling her anything more.
Phaedra caught his shoulders roughly. "Where? Damn you!"
Weylin made a feeble effort to shrink away from her, but at last, he said, "Found woman to care for her at cottage in Yorkshire. Made sure girl wanted for nothing."
Nothing but her mind, Phaedra thought and the family whose love might have
restored her. Phaedra nearly forgot that her grandfather lay wounded and broken himself as she reproached him, "And all these years, you've never told anyone, never tried to reunite her with her family!"
“Girl had no family left. I caught her brother James after he had murdered Carleton. Such a wild lad. I was afraid of his questions, his vengeance. I bullied Ewan into testifying. Made sure Lethington hanged. Then mother and other brother disappeared."
Weylin closed his eyes as though he could shut out Phaedra's reproach and his own guilty conscience. "After I'm gone you see money keeps paid. Take care of that girl until she dies."
"Then tell me where she is," Phaedra said. "What is the name of the woman looking after her."
"Mrs. Link." Her grandfather was tiring. Phaedra had to lean forward to catch his words. He mumbled the woman's address and heaved a great sigh. As though he had eased himself of a vast burden, he fell back to sleep.
Aye, and so he had, Phaedra thought as she straightened. She felt the full weight of that burden settle upon her own shoulders. What was she going to do now? James would have to be told. And yet, how she dreaded his reaction!
To discover that his cherished sister had been alive all these years, her mind broken, taken care of by a stranger. It would only add more fuel to the fires of hatred that already burned in his heart. She wished that she could wait until James was more recovered before telling him but he had to know the truth about his sister.
As she approached his room, she found the door ajar. Gilly had just entered, bearing a breakfast tray. He was now clumsily attempting to arrange James's pillows so that he could sit up and eat.
"If you could just be shifting yourself a bit," Gilly said testily. “It would make things a damned sight easier."
James winced as he complied. His muscular frame was swathed in the folds of a white nightshirt. The face she remembered, possessed of such lean strength and bronzed by the sun was wan Phaedra had to swallow back a lump that formed in her throat.
"You make a cursed rough nursemaid, Fitzhurst," James growled at Gilly.
"And you are a damned surly patient, de LeCroix ... Lethington." Gilly pummeled the pillows so hard that Phaedra expected to see feathers fly about the room. "Whatever the devil I'm supposed to be after calling you."
"You can always try your lairdship," James said with a wry smile, perfectly imitating Gilly's accent.
Phaedra knocked lightly and stepped into the room. James's smile fled immediately. For an instant an expression flared in his eyes, a raw hunger and despair. It quickly vanished as he hooded his gaze.
As Phaedra hovered awkwardly just inside the door, her heart strained toward him. She steeled herself, bidding him a brisk good morning.
"Ah, Fae." Gilly said cheerfully. "You're just in time to witness a battle the likes of which hasn't been seen since Culloden. I'm about to force a bit of breakfast down his lairdship's stubborn throat."
Phaedra forced an overbright smile to her lips. "Oh, is he being difficult?" Her gaze flicked nervously to James. "How are you feeling this morning?"
"Tired," he said dully.
His rigid expression was not encouraging, but she cleared her throat and said to her cousin, "Gilly, I wonder if you could let me have a few moments alone with James."
She saw James tense. A brief hope flickered in his eyes, then quickly died.
Gilly frowned and then shrugged. "Ah, well, I never have been one for insisting upon the proprieties." He angled a glance at James. "I suppose it is safe enough, considering the man's weakened condition." But there was more of banter in Gilly's comment than any intended insult.
"I trust your lairdship will call me to fetch away the tray. I am becoming so good at this, I may seek out a post as butler."
"No one would ever trust you with the keys to the wine cellar," James retorted.
Gilly merely grinned. On his way past Phaedra, he gave her an encouraging wink and squeezed her arm. After Gilly had gone, an uneasy silence settled over the room.
Phaedra avoided any proximity to the bed. She had no idea how to begin. She sensed a lethargy in James that disturbed her. Even when playing the role of the impassive marquis, a steely tension had always coiled within him, leaving her in no doubt of the passions pulsing beneath. Now he seemed empty. It was as though while his body healed, his soul continued to waste away. Exactly as she'd feared.
And yet it was he who first broke the silence. Slightly raising himself, he said, "Phaedra?"
"Aye?" She tried to keep the nearly breathless eagerness from her voice.
He sank back immediately. "Never mind," he muttered. "I grow tired of protesting my innocence." After a pause, he added, "How is your grandfather?"
"I doubt he'll live to see another winter."
"I could say I was sorry. But I am tired of lying, as well."
She studied his face. "Why didn't you just vanish from the theater that night? Why did you rescue him again?"
"You know damn well I came to save you," he said. "Just as that time at the supper party, I was only trying to prevent that fool Wilkins from committing a hanging offense."
"Which he did, anyway."
"No." A taut smile of satisfaction pulled at the corners of James's mouth. "Wilkins was transported. He and his wife are far away from London by now, which we should have been if you-" He broke off the accusation he had been about to make, as if it were not worth the effort.
Phaedra drew nearer in spite of herself. She fidgeted nervously with the end of the counterpane. "What will you do?" she asked "When you are recovered, I mean."
"No, I don't know what you mean," he snapped.
"Your plans for the future."
"Plans. I haven't got any. I had no notion that when you persuaded me to let go of the past, you meant to turn your back on me and rob me of my future happiness as well."
Phaedra's eyes flashed to his with an expression of reproach.
How dare he accuse her of such a thing! It was he who had kept on with his quest for vengeance, destroying any chance of a happy life together that they might have had. But she swallowed her anger. All recriminations now seemed pointless.”
She drew in a quick breath. "I have something to tell you. Something that will affect whatever you decide to do. I have been talking to my grandfather about his part in what happened seven years ago."
"That must have been an exercise in futility."
Ignoring his cynical comment, she continued, "He spoke of your sister. Your suspicions were correct. He took a greater part in her abduction than I ever wanted to believe."
James said harshly, "That comes as no surprise to me."
"I am afraid something that he told me will." She saw no way to ease the shock, but plunged on, revealing to him what her grandfather had said about Julianna. By the time she had done, James's face was ashen, his eyes burning in a manner that alarmed her.
She tried to mitigate her grandfather's sins by adding, "He made certain she is being well cared for-"
But James was no longer listening. He flung aside the counterpane. His lips set into a thin line as he struggled to stand.
"What are you doing?" Phaedra gasped. "Do you want to tear open your wound?"
She tried to force him back into bed, but it would have been easier to move a block of granite. He pushed her aside.
"Where are my clothes?" He took a few unsteady steps and Phaedra thought she read murder in his eyes.
"Please!" She thrust herself in front of him. "My grandfather is already dying. Nothing more that you can do will change-"
"To the devil with him. I'm going after Julianna."
"You cannot possibly. Not all the way to Yorkshire. You'll be dead before you get there."
But James had managed to make his way to the wardrobe. Pawing through the drawers, he located some garments, which had been fetched by one of the footmen from the Heath. James pulled out a pair of breeches and a shirt, his jaw grim with determination.
She fled to the door, call
ing for Gilly.
By the time her cousin arrived, James had already painfully struggled out of the nightshirt and into his breeches. His face was as white as the bandage that bound his shoulder.
"What the deuce!" Gilly said.
Phaedra quickly explained, but she did not receive the support from her cousin that she had expected. His brows drew together in a furious scowl.
"Well, I cannot say as I blame the man. If it were my sister, I would be off like a shot myself."
"Gilly! You can see he's in no condition to ride anywhere." She glanced to where James was pulling on his shirt, his features contorted with pain. Phaedra started to rush to his aid, then stopped. She would be damned if she lifted one finger to help him with this madness.
"In any case," Gilly said, "I don't know how you think I'd be after stopping the man, short of brute force."
"I don't advise you to try it, Fitzhurst," James growled, his fingers fumbling with the buttons.
Phaedra glanced from one man to the other. James’ face was set; Gilly's was equally obstinate. Her shoulders slumped with defeat. She turned to her cousin.
"If you won't stop him, I want you to go with him."
"I don't need a blasted nurse," James said as he located his boots.
"Don't fret," Gilly flung back. "You're not getting one." He looked at Phaedra. "Are you mad, Fae? Do you think I'd be after leaving you to tend a sick old man and with that Goodfellow business still hanging fire in the courts?"
"It will be all right," she said. "I will have Jonathan to help me.”
The skeptical look that passed between James and Gilly showed clearly what they both thought of Jonathan's capabilities.
"Pay her no heed," James said. "I will manage quite well on my own."
"No, you won't!" Phaedra stomped her foot, impatient with all these arrogant male heroics and stupidity. "Gilly, please, after all my grandfather has done, I feel that I owe-"
"You don't owe me a damned thing." James cursed savagely as he painfully thrust his foot into a boot.
But Phaedra clutched at Gilly's arm, giving him that melting look she knew he could not resist. "He'll never make it alone,"Phaedra whispered. "He'll break open that wound and bleed to death somewhere on the road."