I had the opportunity to talk with Gerald Ford a number of times before he died in 2006. Among other things, he told me the presidential accomplishment of which he was most proud was the 1975 Helsinki Accord by which the Soviet Union renounced the use of military force to control countries in Eastern Europe like Poland and Hungary. Mr. Ford believed that this accord laid the groundwork for the eventual collapse of the Soviet Union almost twenty years later.

  In 1976 Jimmy Carter easily defeated the incumbent Ford by fifty-seven electoral votes and close to two million popular votes. Ford lost the election largely because the media portrayed him as a bumbling fool. On Saturday Night Live, Chevy Chase played the President as a walking disaster, falling down every two minutes. Former President Lyndon Johnson described Ford, who was actually very athletic, as a man who had played too much football “without a helmet.”

  Gerald Ford had a chance to turn that perception around in the presidential debates with Carter, but he blew it. Ford came off as inarticulate and old next to the youthful, energetic governor of Georgia.

  The truth is that Gerald Ford was a good man who was in over his head as President. Even though he was an establishment player, he devoted his life to his country. Thus, he goes into the Patriot category on his good intentions alone.

  RONALD REAGAN

  Now here’s an interesting guy. Not as brilliant as his supporters purport, but very effective at leading the nation, especially in his second term when the pressure of reelection was off.

  When Reagan left office in 1988, more Americans were working than at any other time in the nation’s history. But in 1987, the stock market crashed more sharply than it had in 1929.

  Reagan slashed taxes, but the national debt surpassed $1 trillion for the first time ever. By comparison, it is now $13 trillion, with bankruptcy a real possibility for the United States.

  President Reagan spent freely on defense, a strategy that caused the Soviet Union to go bankrupt, or so some historians contend (correctly, I think). So on policy matters, President Reagan won some and lost some. His legacy, however, will be as a strong conservative leader.

  Mr. Reagan was not a culture warrior per se. He did not relish confrontation the way CWs have to. But he was firm in his beliefs. I have a letter written in Reagan’s hand to a proabortion advocate on Long Island:

  I have a very deep belief that interrupting a pregnancy means the taking of a human life. In our Judeo-Christian tradition this can only be justified as a matter of self defense.

  That kind of clarity made Ronald Reagan an inspiring leader to many Americans. Even if you disagree with him, you would have to acknowledge that he brought prestige and authority to the White House, which was badly needed after President Carter’s chaotic term. Even though the press constantly derided him, Reagan was able to communicate directly to the folks, frustrating the national media. ABC White House correspondent Sam Donaldson told me at the time that Reagan never made a decision unless “Mommy” signed off on it. “Mommy,” of course, was Nancy Reagan. Donaldson and some other Washington reporters thought Reagan was an unsophisticated thinker, a rube who did not deserve to lead the country.

  Ronald Reagan took a moment to handwrite this personal note to a proabortion advocate about his deep beliefs in opposition to abortion.

  Author’s Collection

  Photographed by Ryan Eanes

  Finally, both President Reagan and President Obama have one significant thing in common: both saw their poll numbers dive in their second year in office. Reagan, as you all know, made a comeback that qualifies him for major Patriot status.

  Mr. Obama has time left in office for the same to occur, but he also has a long climb back.

  BUSH THE ELDER

  Short takes: Like him. War hero. Entire career devoted to serving his country. Not good at reading lips. Told me the New York Times and Dan Rather treated him unfairly. Which is true. Mediocre President who got caught in the recession blues. As did his son W., which is kinda ironic. Benefited slightly from Saturday Night Live impressionist Dana Carvey’s “wouldn’t be prudent” line. Patriot.

  WARREN HARDING

  Only James Buchanan saves him from consideration as the worst President of all time. Harding was a good card player who took over the country in the wake of World War I. But he was ultimately disgraced. If you don’t know what the Teapot Dome scandal was, trust me, it was not good. Neither was Harding, who did little in office other than play poker and spend taxpayer money on lavish dinner parties.

  Word is, somebody may have poisoned Mr. Harding. He died in San Francisco’s Palace Hotel at age fifty-eight. We cannot confirm the rumors of murder, but his wife did refuse an autopsy. He was in the city by the bay as part of his cross-country “Voyage of Understanding,” a political ploy meant to showcase him talking with regular folks who told him, as we can now report, that he was a Pinhead.

  NOW LET’S MOVE ON to some prominent Americans who have affected the country in both good and bad ways. Again, this is just a list I came up with. There is no reason or order to it. Some might say these musings are the product of a damaged mind. But, of course, folks who would opine that way are Pinheads.

  ROBERT KENNEDY

  Unlike Dwight Eisenhower’s view of the man, I believe RFK was a great Patriot for two reasons: First, as attorney general under his brother the President, he aggressively took on organized crime when FBI director J. Edgar Hoover would not. And secondly, Kennedy spent an enormous amount of time disrupting the corrupt local and state police system in the South that was brutalizing African Americans during the civil rights era. Both actions make Kennedy not only a Patriot but a true American hero.

  So how do I know what Kennedy did? Well, federal wiretaps from the early 1960s show top-ranking members of La Cosa Nostra (“our thing”) venting their hatred for RFK. One thug is quoted as saying, “Bob Kennedy won’t stop until he puts all of us in jail all over the country.” When killers hate you—that’s a good thing.

  Because of Kennedy’s campaign against the Mafia, Director Hoover was forced to sign on as well, signaling a change in the way crime business was done in America. In fact, the heat on organized crime became so intense that a number of bosses, including New Orleans thug Carlos Marcello, discussed assassinating President Kennedy in the hopes of getting rid of Bobby as AG. To this day, some believe that the Mafia had a hand in the murder of John Kennedy.

  On the civil rights front, a great source of emotional information on the bloody and disgraceful resistance to African American rights can be found in the movie Mississippi Burning. If you have not seen that film, starring Gene Hackman, rent it right now.

  As part of my historical source material collection, I own a letter written by Robert Kennedy to Louisiana Senator Allen Ellender, who was fighting hard to maintain the unfair racial status quo in the South. Ellender had challenged President Kennedy’s order for the National Guard to restore order in Alabama after Governor George Wallace, a major Pinhead who repented before he died, refused a federal mandate to integrate the public schools in his state. On August 21, 1963, Attorney General Kennedy wrote this to Ellender:

  The cause for the call and use of the National Guard in Alabama was the obstruction of United States court orders for the entry of qualified students into the University of Alabama. On June 11, 1963, the President issued a proclamation commanding the governor of Alabama and all other persons engaged in the unlawful obstruction to cease and desist therefrom. When it appeared that the commands of that order had not been obeyed and the obstruction of justice was continuing, the President, on the same day, issued Executive Order 11111 authorizing and directing the secretary of defense to take all appropriate steps to remove obstructions of justice in the State of Alabama….

  It is apparent that the Alabama National Guard was properly called into federal service….

  It should be noted here that President Eisenhower did not confront Alabama and some other states over their denial of rights to American citize
ns. But the Kennedy brothers did act decisively and succeeded in imposing justice where it had been denied for two centuries. Even though I generally respect Eisenhower, I simply can’t understand his disdain for RFK, who did the right and courageous thing while Ike did not. Maybe that’s it. Perhaps the old general knew he had failed blacks in the South and was galled that the young, arrogant Kennedys trumped him. That’s pure speculation, but it’s absolutely possible, is it not?

  In this letter, RFK, a true champion of civil rights, defends the decision to send the National Guard to Alabama, where in one of the most historically Pinheaded moves ever, Governor George Wallace attempted to stop desegregation.

  Author’s Collection

  Photographed by Ryan Eanes

  It is also interesting to note that the Kennedy brothers used the National Guard to protect American citizens from unfair behavior that harmed them. Do we not see a parallel to putting the Guard on the Southwestern border today? As mentioned earlier, I have been calling for that action during the past ten years because millions of Americans are being adversely affected by illegal alien chaos. So here’s the question: Would Robert Kennedy have backed me on this? Impossible to call. Most committed liberals oppose taking strong action against illegal immigration. They see these poor immigrants as oppressed and in need of help, which indeed they are. But allowing federal immigration laws to be broken by millions of people is not a solution to anything and has caused considerable damage to America. Would RFK have seen that? I simply don’t know.

  Like his brother John, Robert Kennedy was a complicated man who did some bad things with his power as well. But the human condition dictates that we all do bad things on occasion. We all have balance sheets.

  Robert Kennedy was a Patriot for understanding that evil, such as organized crime and institutional bigotry, cannot be allowed to stand unchallenged, especially in the noblest country in the world.

  CÉSAR CHÁVEZ

  Largely forgotten these days, Chávez was, in many ways, the Hispanic American equivalent to Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. In 1942 the high school dropout became a migrant worker and experienced the pain of brutal physical labor for incredibly low wages. Chávez then devoted his life to improving the lives of the mostly uneducated men and women working in the fields.

  Using nonviolent methods, Chávez formed the United Farm Workers Union and as a result became a lightning rod of controversy. Accused by some of being a communist, the militant Chávez cultivated powerful people, including movie stars, and embarrassed many companies into upgrading benefits for migrant workers, at least somewhat.

  Like Dr. King, César Chávez understood economic exploitation and was not an ardent capitalist. That alienated him from some Americans who might otherwise have admired his cause but felt his political leanings were too far Left. Be that as it may, the record shows that by sheer guts and determination, César Chávez helped millions of hard-working people improve their lives. For that alone, he was a Patriot.

  JOHN EDWARDS

  I know what you’re thinking. Why bother? The guy defines the word Pinhead. His wife has cancer so he goes out and has an affair with a frenzied fan and winds up impregnating her. Then he lies about it on Nightline. Good grief. And this guy was a vice-presidential nominee? Paging John Kerry.

  My primary beef with Edwards came before his cruel and outrageous personal conduct. As a candidate in the 2008 presidential primary sweepstakes, Edwards dishonestly used the plight of injured veterans in an effort to win votes.

  You may remember that the former litigator ran around the country saying that there were hundreds of thousands of destitute vets living under bridges because they couldn’t get jobs. Edwards wailed loudly about the apathy and injustice in America. How could we let this happen?

  Well, we checked out the homeless “living under a bridge” claim and found it to be completely bogus. The Veterans Administration has enough beds to house almost every homeless vet in the United States. In fact, the VA will drive pretty much anywhere to pick up a vet who does not have shelter.

  The truth is that a significant number of American veterans have substance abuse and mental health problems, just as a significant number of people in the general population do. These unfortunate citizens have a hard time functioning in a job situation and often wind up broke. Fox News military analyst Colonel David Hunt works with some of these vets in Boston, so I know the landscape. Edwards knew it, too. He just didn’t care about the truth. He wanted to exploit the vets by demeaning the country, so he did. If you want to see the worst of America, catch up with John Edwards as he jogs back to his multimillion-dollar mansion in North Carolina. Don’t even bother calling him a Pinhead. Don’t talk to him at all. The man deserves total silence from his fellow citizens.

  GEORGE SOROS

  Here is another obvious Pinhead, but I just can’t resist the opportunity to call attention to that fact once more.

  Forbes magazine says the guy is worth $14 billion, and some estimate that he has spent $7 billion trying to impose his Far Left view on the world by funding despicable organizations like MoveOn.org. That was the outfit that accused General David Petraeus of betraying his country by successfully commanding the war in Iraq. The “General Betray Us” ad by MoveOn.org will live forever in infamy.

  And so will George Soros. If you want the nuts and bolts on this guy, please read my book Culture Warrior. If you don’t have the time, let me type up his résumé for you:

  is an atheist

  wants open borders for America

  wants to legalize narcotics

  convicted of felony insider trading by a French court

  through the Open Society Institute, which he founded, gave $20,000 to defend attorney Lynne Stewart, who was eventually convicted of assisting terrorists

  gamed U.S. election laws by donating close to $25 million to more than five hundred political organizations, all dedicated to humiliating President George W. Bush.

  To be fair, Soros has given a good amount of money to help people in need, but not nearly enough to buy his way out of Pinhead status.

  No, you’re not seeing double. This is one of my least favorite guys, George Soros, in a shot that says to me, “I’m twice the Pinhead most people are!” What does it say to you?

  Associated Press/AP

  Photographed by Jacky Zhao/Color China Photo/AP Images

  AS YOU MAY KNOW, I consider myself a warrior in the public arena. But my position there does not even come close to the courage and sacrifice of American military warriors. Let’s take a look at some of the famous and infamous Americans on the battlefield.

  GENERAL GEORGE ARMSTRONG CUSTER

  He was a crazy guy and most likely a Pinhead, but his loyal wife, Elizabeth, would have taken great issue with that. After Indians killed her husband, she traveled the country promoting his legacy and succeeded in making him a national hero whose name endures to this day.

  After graduating dead last in his 1861 class at West Point, Custer demonstrated bravery as a cavalry officer in the Civil War and was promoted to brigadier general at age twenty-three. Catching the eye of General Grant, Custer participated in the last battle against General Lee as Confederate forces fled Richmond. The young Custer relished fighting, and that proved to be his undoing.

  After the Civil War, Custer moved West and fought Indians, achieving some success in the campaign against the Cheyenne in 1868.

  Eight years later, Custer was still at it, chasing the Sioux and Cheyenne into Montana. The rest, as they say, is history.

  Ignoring orders to wait for reinforcements, Custer divided his men into three groups. His crew, numbering 266, attacked a sprawling Indian village inhabited by legendary warriors Sitting Bull and Crazy Horse. This did not turn out well. Thousands of Indians counterattacked, surrounding Custer and his troops in a field near the Little Big Horn River. The battle was brutal, with no survivors among Custer’s troops. All the bodies were mutilated except for the general’s, which the Indians left lar
gely intact.

  I have walked that battlefield and it is well worth doing. General Custer’s arrogance killed him and his guys. The lesson for all of us is that if your head swells, somebody is sure to come along and knock it off. Custer felt he was invincible. Nobody is. He became a Pinhead and died from it.

  GENERAL GEORGE PATTON

  This man was truly a fascinating guy. Immortalized by actor George C. Scott in the movie Patton, the general was a lot like Custer but not quite so impetuous. He fought against Pancho Villa in Mexico, then alongside General John Pershing in World War I, where he was wounded twice and won a slew of medals. Patton continued his heroics in World War II, driving the Germans out of North Africa and Sicily. (He had a lot of help, of course.)

  Then came General Patton’s media moment. While visiting a hospital full of wounded GI’s, he slapped one of them because he thought the man was malingering. The press went wild. It was a hundred times worse than the General Stanley McChrystal Rolling Stone incident. But unlike President Obama, who fired the unfortunate McChrystal, General Eisenhower did not sack Patton, who then went on to orchestrate great victories on French and German soil.

  Was Patton a Pinhead for slapping the guy? Sure. No need to do that. If you think a soldier is faking an injury, investigate and, if he’s guilty, cashier him. But a true leader should never show the lack of discipline that Patton demonstrated.