Disgust ate at his gut. He looked away. A flash of auburn hair had him jerking his head upright. Had he imagined it? Was he so bloody mad that he was finally seeing things? Someone shifted, there it was again. Shimmering auburn locks, curls cascading over creamy bare shoulders and a back covered with a light blue gown that pinched a tiny waist and flared to the floor in a wave of shimmering folds. He froze. She was here. Grace had come. Damn her.
His heart slammed in his chest, his blood thrumming under his skin. His soul sensed her. His fingers curled as he resisted the urge to go to her... and say what? No, he’d ruin her reputation by singling her out.
As if sensing his attention, she turned. Like everyone else she wore a mask, her upper face covered, unrecognizable by a simple blue covering. But those lush lips were free. He didn’t need to see her face completely to know it was Grace. He sensed her. Felt her deep within his being.
Her gaze scanned the crowd as if looking for something or someone. Looking for him? His heart stopped; fear and eagerness fighting for attention. Before she noticed him he slipped behind a column. He leaned back against the cool marble and took in a deep, trembling breath.
Although beautiful, she looked so out of place here amongst the cruel and callous ton. An angel in hell. She glowed with a purity when they all faded with dullness. They wouldn’t appreciate someone like Grace. They’d find her odd, a curiousity. She didn’t belong in a brothel and she didn’t belong in this world where he barely resided. She didn’t belong with him.
The thought of seeing her now was too much. Damn it. He couldn’t speak with her now, not when he was going to see Lady Sweetin. He couldn’t be so close to her. He couldn’t remember that kiss and not touch her.
Need swelled within. The desire to breathe in her clean scent, to hold her warm body. The need to have her slowly draw her fingers through his hair…
He clenched his teeth so tight, his jaw began to ache. No. She’d kissed him out of guilt and sympathy. She hadn’t kissed because she cared. God forbid. She merely felt guilty. At least, he had to believe that because if he didn’t, he wouldn’t be able to go outside.
Alex pushed away from the column. And if she did have feelings? His mind taunted. Well then, it had happened before. Clients falling for their men. Lady Lavender always made quick work of putting an end to any affection they might share. But it didn’t matter because he was leaving. He wasn’t a complete arse. He’d send her a note, explain to her that he’d had to escape, that they could never see each other again. Perhaps she’d be upset at first, but she’d move on…most likely finding comfort in the arms of her earl.
No, she wasn’t enamored. Women often thought they had feelings for their men after they’d been intimate, but the most he and Grace had done was kiss. No, she wasn’t enamored, she merely felt indebted to him. With renewed determination, he started toward the doors that led into the garden. He would ignore her. He would not search her out. He would not think about her.
The cool air fluttered the tails of his coat, cooled his fevered skin. But on the inside he still simmered. His feet hit the marble patio, tap, tap, tap. Keep going. Do not look back. Ignore the cuddling couples hidden in the shadows. But his body had a mind of its own. He froze. He would not look… He turned, searching through the windows for Grace. She was coming straight at him, her face set in determination.
“Shite.” He stepped back, hiding halfway behind an open door.
He felt her appearance like a caress. So close that he swore he could feel her body’s warmth. She paused on the patio, those delicate shoulders rising and falling with each sharp breath. Was she looking for him? Damn, had she seen him? Lifting the hem of her gown, she darted down the steps and between two yews, gone within a moment. What was she doing? Surely she wasn’t meeting someone for a randevous? The hell she was. She might as well have labeled herself ruined for all of London.
He moved quickly, purposefully down those steps, following her footprints in the damp grass. He knew what could happen to an unescorted lady. Apparently she didn’t. Where was her brother, or that dandy prat Rodrick? He pushed between the two yews and froze. She’d disappeared. Nowhere to be seen. He was just about to turn, thinking perhaps he’d missed her, when he heard the beautiful sound of her voice.
“Hell,” she whispered from above.
Alex tilted his head back. Blue skirts and white petticoats ruffled seductively above. She hovered over him, hidden in the branches and he could see directly up her skirts, those long legs clad in wicked black stockings. Dear lord, he’d never seen a more beautiful view.
********
Grace had never seen a more tantalizing or shocking view.
She had never actually witnessed a couple making love but feared that was exactly what she was seeing through the windows on the second floor. In some unidentifiable room, where a couple had hidden away, not realizing they were visible for all in the garden to see, or perhaps not caring.
Blast, but this was ridiculous. She should be hiking up her skirt and climbing over the wall, the only unseen way out of this hell, as John had refused to escort her home or loan her the carriage. But instead, she found sudden fascination with the way the man was kissing that woman’s neck. The way she tilted her head. The way she parted her lips and grasped the strands of his hair in such a tight grip that surely it hurt.
And in her mind she saw Alex, doing those things to her. She saw Alex pressing his firm lips to her throat. Alex sliding her sleeves down her shoulders to kiss her collarbone…further to the tops of her breasts.
“We do offer such amusements for a small fee, you know.”
The deep, velvet voice shocked Grace cold. Startled, she instinctively released her grip on the branches above. Too late. Caught completely off balance, she threw her arms wide, her fingers desperately searching for a sure hold. She found nothing. Gravity did its job well and pulled her toward the ground. She was falling and she’d land on her arse in front of Alex. Grace squeezed her eyes shut, preparing to hit the ground.
But she didn’t slam unceremoniously into the grass. Instead, she hit strong arms, which pulled her to a hard chest. At the impact, a gasp escaped her lips. Her lashes lifted and she stared into two brilliant blue eyes. A mask covered half his face, but still, she knew his scent over the sweetness of roses climbing the wall; musk and warm spring. She knew his voice; husky and deep. She knew those lips; just made for pleasure…
“What are you doing here?” she asked, attempting to smooth her face into unreadable lines. Silly, really. She’d been caught red-handed spying on a couple making love and was playing the innocent. Yet, instead of being embarrassed, the only feeling that swept through her was pure euphoria at seeing Alex. She’d entered an hour ago, unable to find him in the crush. And she’d worried… much more than she should.
“What are you doing here?” he repeated her same words.
“I…I was…” And for one brief moment she almost blurted out the truth. But if she admitted the truth, he’d think she cared. And she knew as well as anyone that she couldn’t care; not about Alex, a man about as attainable as the Prince.
She swallowed hard and pressed her lips into a firm line, staring directly into his hooded gaze. She didn’t need to defend herself. When she didn’t respond, he loosened his hold and she slid down his hard body, every muscle evident through the fine material of their clothing. Her feet hit the damp grass, while her heart dropped to her toes.
He looked annoyed. His jaw clenched, his body stiff. She’d never seen him this way. Why was he annoyed? Were his injuries still paining him? Four days, it had been four days since she’d seen him, but it felt a year. She wanted to grab him and hug him. She wanted to kiss him. She wanted to tell him every tiny detail that had happened in her life since she’d seen him last.
“I didn’t realize you were interested in that sort of thing,” he murmured.
She stepped back, further away from him, even though the fall had made her dizzy and she had the urge
to use his strength as support. “What sort of thing?”
“Watching.”
Confused, wary, she shook her head. “I don’t understand.”
He settled his bare hands on her shoulders. He wore no gloves. Indecent, really, but then she shouldn’t be surprised. Slowly, he turned her so her back pressed to his chest. He reached his arm around her, his forearm pressing to her breasts, his finger under her chin. Slowly, carefully, he tilted her head back until her gaze locked to that window. Heat shot to Grace’s face. Oh God, Alex thought…he thought she was…thought she liked…
“No, I—”
“You can watch, you know.” He leaned his head down, so his breath whispered seductively across the side of her face. “Not many women ask for it, but it is possible. Of course there’s a fee. Always a fee.”
There was a cruel taunt to his voice, a tone she didn’t like. She shook her head, unable to say anything more, for how did she defend herself? He drew her back, closer, her bottom fitting to his hard thighs. Too intimate.
“No,” she whispered breathlessly. “I wasn’t—”
“Do you like to watch?” His warm breath tickled her ear. “Or were you merely remembering how it feels to have someone’s lips pressed to your neck?”
“No, I—” His mouth skimmed the sensitive skin directly below her ear. “Oh my, that does feel rather lovely.” Her knees gave out as she sank back into him.
“Or the way his hand moves to her breast.” His fingers moved down her neck and boldly cupped a breast, his palm warm through her gown. Her nipples instantly hardened, her breasts growing heavy with desire. She’d seen him naked, yet he’d never touched her like this, never so boldly. Damn her, but she liked it, she didn’t want him to stop.
“Or the way his hand moves down her lower belly.” With his left hand still cupping her breast, his right hand moved across her satin bodice. Lower, his warm fingers slid to that area between her legs. A heavy ache seeped low in her gut. Grace sucked in a sharp breath. He paused, torturing her. She resisted the urge to move, to bring him closer and at the same time, push him away.
Slowly, he bunched up the material of her gown. She knew she should stop him, but couldn’t seem to get the words past her trembling lips. Higher the material traveled until her legs were exposed to the cool night air.
“Alex,” she said, her voice tight.
“Shhh, let me touch you.” His breath was warm against her ear, warm and seductive and she let him pull her skirts higher, even knowing his actions were wrong. She felt his palm flatten to her lower belly and the ache between her legs twisted, burning with a need she didn’t understand. Grace whimpered, shifting. His fingers slipped under the waistband of her bloomers.
“Let me touch you,” he repeated, then licked the shell of her ear.
Before she could respond one way or another, he slipped his fingers through the soft curls at the junction of her thighs. Grace bit her lower lip, staring at the few stars that managed to peek from the clouds. She couldn’t seem to breathe, couldn’t speak, could barely stand. The only thing she could focus on was his finger currently slipping between her sleek folds.
She wanted to tell him to cease, but instead, “Please,” slipped from her mouth.
Alex slid his finger lower, between the wet folds. Grace groaned, her head lulling back against his shoulders.
“You feel so good,” he whispered. “So wet, so ready for me.”
Yes. She wanted to be ready for him. She wanted Alex, had wanted him for days. His thumb brushed the sensitive bud that nestled between her folds. Grace gasped, arching her back as sensation after brilliant sensation burst through her body. It was as if he’d taken the stars from the sky and thrown them into her soul. It was too much, almost too much, yet she wanted more.
“Hold tight, my love. I’ll show you a pleasure you could only dream of.” His finger slid into her tight sheath. Foreign, yet so very welcome. “So ready for me,” he murmured, pressing his lips to her neck.
Yes, yes she was ready for him.
“Tonight, only, we’re allowed to let women sample our wares, you know.”
His words entered her muddled mind and pierced her heart with a cold chill. Her eyes opened. She stiffened in his hold. He felt cold and hard behind her. The couple in the room upstairs had turned off the lantern, the window dark.
“Say the word, Gracie, if you want me to show you pleasure.”
Need fought with common sense. She pushed his hand away, her skirts falling down around her ankles. Gasping for air, she spun around and with the heels of her palms pushed him. He stumbled back a step, hitting the stone wall. The surprised look upon his handsome face was worth it.
“You arse! I was sneaking out to check on you and you treat me like this? I saw Lady Lavender. I knew she wasn’t at the estate and I was worried because I couldn’t find you. I wasn’t here to watch some couple make love in the windows.”
Sudden tears stung her eyes. She turned around and stomped toward the yews. She’d gotten only a couple feet away when strong fingers bit into her waist. She was spun around and found herself face to face with Alex.
For one long moment they merely stared at each other. Emotion… shock, bemusement, need… flickering between them. How she wished she could tear off his mask, see his face entirely.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered, pulling her close.
Her hands flattened to his hard chest as he lowered his head. It was a soft kiss, a yielding kiss. One of passion and apologies. And she, damn it all, forgave him immediately.
Grace slid her arms around his neck, standing on tip toe to press her body to his. No one had ever apologized to her, not John for being an ass, not her Mama for allowing their stepfather to be cruel. But Alex had, and he didn’t need to.
His teeth nibbled on her full bottom lip until she sighed. Making quick work of deepening the kiss, his tongue slid into her mouth, rubbing, licking, tasting. Grace groaned, arching into him as her fingers slipped into those silky curls tossed about his head. He tasted of mint and champagne, he tasted lovely and she feared she’d become addicted.
His mouth moved to her jawline, lower… following the curve of her neck he placed soft, delicate kisses. “You’re so beautiful, Dorogoy.”
Vaguely she was aware that he’d spoken another language, but for some reason it didn’t seem to matter much at the moment. His tongue darted out, tracing a hot path to her ear. Grace’s knees grew weak. At her lower belly she could feel his hard arousal pulsing against her skirts, begging to be touched. She would oblige. She would give him all. She knew in that moment, she would give him all of her.
“Well, well, what is this?” A woman’s voice pierced her foggy reality. Alex froze, his body stiffening. “You found us a plaything, how wonderful, Alex.”
Grace looked into Alex’s face, but he was staring at someone beyond her shoulder. Oh Dear God! Grace fumbled with her mask, making sure it was in place before she turned. A woman stood before them, a feathered mask obscuring her features from view, but Grace recognized the voice and had probably been introduced to the woman.
“Three is better than two, isn’t it, my dear?” The woman moved forward, her hips swaying seductively with each step.
Grace felt like she’d been punched in the gut. Alex wasn’t here for her, Alex had come into the garden to meet with this woman. To touch this woman. To kiss this woman.
“No,” Grace whispered. Anger and hurt mixed in a sickening combination. Her frantic gaze found his. Alex merely stood there, his jaw clenched, those hands, which had only moments ago touched her so gently, fisted at his sides. He didn’t deny it. Didn’t say a word. He merely stood there.
Grace stumbled back a step, the frantic need to escape overwhelming.
Dear God, she was falling for the man and he was here for another woman. Tears burned her eyes. She was an idiot. She blinked rapidly, refusing to cry in front of them.
“Gracie,” he finally whispered, the word so soft that perhaps i
t was merely the breeze and she had only imagined he’d said her name.
“No,” she said again, shaking her head. “He’s yours.” She turned and ran, bursting blindly through the yews, leaving behind the bloodied pieces of her broken heart.
Chapter 12
“Well, that was…interesting.” Lady Sweetin started toward Alex, the swoosh of her skirts unnaturally loud.
He jerked his gaze toward her, his breathing harsh, his body tense. An animal hunted. The urge to go after Grace overwhelmed any good sense. He couldn’t. He wouldn’t. He curled his fingers so tight, his nails bit into his palms. He swore he could still smell her scent over Lady Sweetin’s strong perfume.
“Some women merely aren’t adventurous.” Lady Sweetin rested her hand on his chest, her touch chill, repulsive.
He wanted to shove her away. To erase the woman from his mind. All women, but Grace. With Lady Sweetin so near, he no longer felt free. Caged. Imprisoned by her hold.
She trailed her fingers up his chest and slipped her arm around his neck. Alex merely stood there, stiff in her embrace. Undaunted, she stood on tiptoe, hovering near his mouth, her breath smelling of sherry.
“I hate sherry,” Grace had said.
Suddenly, he did too.
Leaning forward, Lady Sweetin flattened her breasts to his chest and kissed him. “Mmm,” she whispered against his mouth.
Numb, Alex didn’t move. It was as if he’d left his body entirely. What little soul he contained, had escaped with Grace. Lady Sweetin’s tongue darted out, sliding against his lips like a wet eel. The touch sent his stomach churning. He couldn’t do this.
His heart slammed erratically inside his chest. Blast it, he wanted to push her away. He wanted to tell her to go fuck herself.
He couldn’t.
“What is it?” she whispered, sensing his reluctance.
He didn’t respond, afraid the truth would slip from his lips. Clamping his mouth shut, he remained stubbornly silent and stared at that dark window where only moments ago Grace had watched the couple inside. What could he say? That Lady Sweetin repulsed him. That he hated her smell. That he hated the feel of her hands on him. That she made him sick.