‘Really?’ I said.
‘Really.’ He sounded amused. ‘Absolutely. Its little predilections are in a slightly different direction.’
‘You should have told me,’ I said fiercely.
‘Nothing to tell.’
‘This doesn’t bother you at all, does it,’ I said.
He made a soft sound of amusement and moved slightly away. He opened his mouth to say something, then obviously changed his mind and closed it again.
‘Tell me,’ I said.
‘I don’t think it would be a good idea. You are very accepting, but I think this would be too much for even you to accept.’
‘Try me,’ I growled.
‘I don’t want to lose you, Emma,’ he said softly.
‘Oh shit,’ I said with despair. ‘Not you too? Where did my normal life go?’
‘She’ll find it amusing, my Lord,’ the stone said. ‘You’d better tell her; right now she thinks it’s much worse than it really is.’
‘Okay, I’ll take your word for it.’ John didn’t move but his face changed. ‘Spring of 1978,’ he said wistfully. ‘About three years after I’d lost the Serpent. The water around Hainan Island was unusually warm, and crystal clear. I ran into a stunning female turtle Shen. Pursued her for ages, both of us in True Form. She teased me, and evaded me, for days. Every time I thought I had her, she would take off again. She drove me mad.’
I was silent. I could picture it.
‘I finally had her; I had my flippers over her shell.’ His eyes were very dark. ‘I heard a sound behind me.’ His face twisted into a wry grin. ‘The Calypso. They were filming us, very excited. They launched a Zodiac and circled us, filming. I was the largest marine turtle they’d ever seen, and they’d caught us in the act. First time on film, marine turtles mating. They were delighted.’
I collapsed backwards onto my pillow, laughing silently.
‘See?’ the stone said.
I gasped for breath. I couldn’t speak I was laughing so hard. I wheezed with the effort.
‘She wants to know if you bothered to stop,’ the stone said.
John hesitated, then, ‘Nope.’
I rolled onto my side and clutched my stomach. I laughed so hard I felt like I was about to throw up.
‘I’ve…I’ve…’ I tried to suck in enough air to speak.
‘She thinks she’s seen it,’ the stone said.
‘Everybody’s seen it,’ John said. ‘It’s a standard piece of footage now. Whenever they bring up the subject of marine turtle reproduction, there we are, large as life.’
I gasped for breath.
‘Yes, Emma, we are a matched set,’ the stone said. ‘He is an exhibitionist, and I am a voyeur.’
‘The Tiger is three times the exhibitionist that I am,’ John said. ‘I don’t think I’m an exhibitionist at all. I’m just a Turtle, and when my flippers are over a nice piece of shell everything else falls beside the way.’
I wiped my eyes, my hands shaking.
‘And the fact that you don’t have one makes absolutely no difference at all to me,’ John said softly. ‘It is the inside that counts more than anything else. And the inside of you is the most…’ His voice trailed off.
‘He can’t finish it, Emma,’ the stone said.
I wiped my eyes with my palms. I was still shaking.
‘Rest,’ John said. ‘Simone is safe, you are safe, the remaining students are safe. That is all that is important in the world.’
‘Thank Leo for me,’ I said softly, my voice quivering. ‘For cleaning me up.’
‘I will,’ he said. ‘He refused to let Ah Yat do it. You were only semi-conscious and he was concerned she would drop you. He said you would not mind. Rest.’
I reached over to my bedside table, pulled a couple of tissues out of the box, and nodded into them.
John rose to leave.
‘Porn star,’ I gasped loudly as he went out.
He laughed softly as he closed the door.
CHAPTER THIRTY
I stepped out of my bathroom, clean and feeling much better. I rummaged through the disaster area that was my wardrobe, searching for something comfortable to wear; my back was sore from lying on the rock in the vacant lot.
I stopped dead.
‘That was the phone digging into my back, wasn’t it?’ I said.
‘The King’s phone?’ the stone said. It hesitated, then, ‘Oh, yes. You were lying on it, and you didn’t take it with you.’
I rummaged through the clothes again. ‘I need to go back and get it.’
The stone didn’t say anything.
‘How come I came around with no clothes, but you and the phone were there?’ I said as I finally found a clean pair of jeans.
‘The phone follows you, Emma,’ the stone said. ‘When you returned to human form, it materialised.’
‘Oh,’ I said. ‘What about you? I don’t have hands to hold you when I’m a snake. Where did you go?’
‘I stayed with you,’ the stone said.
‘How? On my tail?’
The stone was silent.
‘Oh my God, this is something really weird, isn’t it?’
‘Depends on your definition of “weird”. I move inside you,’ the stone said.
I sat on the bed. ‘No. I don’t want you in there.’
‘It’s not what you think,’ the stone said. ‘I become lodged in the muscle tissue of your back, about a third of the way along your serpent length.’
I didn’t feel very relieved. ‘That is extremely weird.’
‘It’s extremely claustrophobic. I don’t like it at all.’
‘I’m not sore there,’ I said. ‘That’s strange.’ Then I flexed my left shoulder and felt a definite twinge, as if I had torn a muscle and it had nearly healed. ‘Whoa.’
‘Put your clothes on,’ the stone said. ‘The Dark Lord is coming; he sensed that you were awake.’
We need to get together and work out what to do, Emma, John said. We have some major problems and your help would be appreciated, if you are feeling up to it.
I grabbed an old T-shirt from the wardrobe and tugged it over my head, then went to the door and opened it. John waited on the other side.
‘I’m okay. What’s the problem?’
‘Come into the dining room and we’ll talk about it,’ he said.
Leo and the Shaolin Master, Liu, waited for us, with the two other remaining Immortal Masters, the junior Tai Chi Master, Mike Chow, and the wushu Master, Audrey Au. They saluted as we sat.
Mike was a huge Chinese who’d gained Immortality about seven hundred years ago. He’d taught Meredith, then suggested that she take over as Energy Master because she was so much better than he was.
Audrey was a tiny Chinese lady who looked far too delicate to have anything to do with any of the Arts. Wushu was the demonstration Art, rather like rhythmic gymnastics: gorgeous to look at but not generally useful as a fighting style. This sort of Art, the elegant presentation type, was what many practitioners meant when they said ‘wushu’.
It was understandable that these two had survived the demon attacks; neither of them were terribly useful in battle and had probably stayed with the junior students. Liu had been with Simone, so he hadn’t been attacked.
The three of them were all we had left.
‘First,’ Liu said, ‘Disciples. Casualties: ten seniors. What to do?’
‘What about the juniors?’ I said.
‘The seniors and the Immortals gave their lives for them,’ John said matter-of-factly. ‘And succeeded. We lost only the first two.’
‘Which seniors did we lose?’ I said.
Liu handed me a list and I scanned through it. Ten of the best. All but one were Chinese. They were all over the age of thirty; a couple of them were in their sixties. John had discussed them with me before: he thought that some of them were well on the way to attaining the Tao. We had planned a small ceremony in the next few weeks to officially promote eight of them to Master, as they were
already doing the duties of junior Masters. They were all like family and I felt a pang as I perused the list. I would really miss them.
‘Did any of them get there?’ I said softly.
John didn’t say anything.
‘Maybe next time,’ I said, hoping for some sort of reaction.
John’s and Liu’s expressions didn’t shift.
‘Are you allowed to say anything at all about it?’ I said.
Liu leaned back. ‘Ten seniors. What to do?’
‘Families?’ I said.
‘Three had families, grown-up children. The other seven didn’t. None of them have immediate family back in China, or Europe in Jim’s case, just the extended clans.’
‘Inter them on the Mountain, John,’ I said. ‘It’s the least we can do for them. Send ancestral tablets to their clans in China. Can you cremate them on the Mountain?’
‘Yes,’ John said. ‘You will arrange it, Chow Sifu. I will have Jade send a couple of dragons to assist you. If you have trouble, contact me any time.’
‘I’ll need the right people to do the tablets,’ Mike said.
‘General Pak will be in touch. There are plenty of clergy in the Northern Heavens—refugees from temples destroyed during the Mountain Attack. They will come to the Mountain and perform the rituals.’
‘My Lord,’ Mike said, lowered his head and disappeared.
I sighed. I glanced back at the list of seniors and noticed there were a couple more pages stapled to it. I flipped the paper and froze with horror.
The next two pages were lists of numbers, English and Greek numbers. And a couple of names. One of the names was ‘Sonia’. I dropped the paper on the desk and put my head in my hands.
‘How many demon staff did we lose?’ I said into my hands.
‘The four security guards—the two on the ground floor and the two at the entrance to the car park—are all that remain. The only reason the security guards weren’t destroyed is because the demons ignored them when they came into the building and went right past them,’ John said, his voice very calm. ‘All of them, Emma. The attacking demons seemed to have a grudge against ours, and singled them out for special attention. The defenders concentrated on protecting the humans, and the demons helped them. Many of them fought valiantly.’
‘But Sonia was human,’ I whispered.
‘I think they knew, love.’
I had to look away. I wiped my eyes.
‘My Lord,’ Liu said, and hesitated. He looked down at his hands. His expression under his bushy white brows was miserable.
‘We can’t spare you, old friend,’ John said gently.
‘She’s all alone down there,’ Liu whispered.
‘Meredith?’ I said.
Liu nodded.
‘Let him go, John. Please.’
‘We can’t spare him, Emma. We only have three left.’
‘How long will she be down there?’ I said.
‘Where?’ Leo said. ‘I wish you people would stop talking in riddles.’
I smiled at Leo. ‘Do you have any idea what happens to Immortals when their physical forms are killed?’
‘They go to Hell, stay there for a while, then turn up again, good as new,’ Leo said. ‘That’s it, isn’t it?’
‘That’s right,’ I said. ‘Straight to Level Ten, the bottom level, stay there for a while doing who knows what, then pop back up here.’
‘What happens to them down there?’ he said.
‘None of the Immortals will talk about it,’ I said loudly without looking at the three Immortals who sat, unmoving, at the table with us.
‘All of the Celestial Masters are in Hell?’ Leo said. ‘Is that just for China?’
‘I have no idea, and it’s a waste of time asking,’ I said.
‘What about ordinary people?’ Leo said. His face cleared. ‘Oh, that’s why you said “next time”.’
Once again nobody said anything.
‘Once it is all handled, you may go, my friend,’ John said to Liu. ‘Until then, you are needed here. She will understand.’
‘How long will it take?’ I said.
Liu and John shared a look. ‘About three months,’ John said.
‘Intercede,’ the stone in my ring said. ‘You need them.’
John made a soft sound but didn’t say anything.
‘You can do that?’ I said.
Neither John nor Liu spoke. Their faces were rigid.
‘You’re not supposed to talk about it, are you,’ I said.
‘There have always been people who wanted me thrown from Heaven, Emma,’ John said softly.
‘I see,’ I said.
‘How come you know all this, Emma?’ Leo said.
‘Research.’
‘Far too much for your own good,’ John said. ‘Only about twenty-five per cent of what’s out there is correct anyway.’
‘I can tell what’s right,’ I said. ‘It’s obvious.’
‘I think you should start doing a PhD to keep yourself busy, before you do get me thrown from Heaven,’ John said with grim humour.
‘I have well and truly enough to do right now as it is,’ I said.
John straightened and changed the subject. ‘We only have three Celestial Masters left. We also have three of the original human Masters, all of whom are really too frail to take up much of the workload. There’s only one thing we can do.’
I dropped my head. ‘Close up shop.’
‘No,’ Leo whispered. ‘You can’t.’
‘We’ll send them all home, Leo,’ I said. ‘There’s not much else we can do.’
‘I’ll rent the ballroom of one of the hotels in Admiralty, have a farewell dinner, make the announcement,’ John said, his voice full of pain. ‘The seniors who want to remain with us can stay at the Folly. Many of them have no other family, no other interests, and nowhere else to go. Emma and the remaining Celestials can look after them after I’m gone. All the juniors should go home to their families.’
‘It’s the only thing we can do,’ I said, my heart breaking. The juniors would be devastated when they heard.
‘Once the juniors are home, the seniors are organised, and the demon is taken out, you have my permission,’ John said to Liu.
‘My Lord,’ Liu whispered, his voice hoarse.
‘Hold it a minute,’ I said. ‘You can’t rent a ballroom—we don’t have Gold. We’ll have to do it at Hennessy Road. And we don’t have space for everybody in one room.’
‘What’s the problem?’ Leo said.
‘Language,’ I said. ‘They’ll be able to understand Lord Xuan, but nobody else.’
‘Oh.’
‘You’re quite correct,’ John said.
‘Gather them into the training rooms at Hennessy Road, make the announcement by telepathy,’ I said. ‘It’s the only way.’
‘We lost Jade and Gold as well?’ Leo said.
‘We lost Gold,’ I said. ‘Have you heard from him? Is he in Hell?’
‘We haven’t heard from him,’ the stone said, completely emotionless. ‘He has disappeared. He is not in Hell, he is not on Earth, he is not on the Celestial. He does not answer when he is called.’
‘Oh God,’ I whispered.
Leo moaned gently and rubbed his hands over his face.
‘We lost all the stones,’ John said without looking up. ‘All of them. The attackers had some way of disabling them. At this stage it is not clear whether the same thing has happened to them.’
The stone made a soft hissing sound, but didn’t say anything.
‘What about the dragons?’ I said.
‘Most of the dragons escaped death because of their speed,’ John said. ‘They fought valiantly. Many of them were injured, though, and have been moved to the East to recover. We have about a dozen dragons left, including Jade, who couldn’t fight.’
‘Is Jade okay?’ Leo said.
‘Jade’s apparently sitting on a clutch of eggs and didn’t tell anybody,’ I said.
 
; ‘Terrific timing,’ Leo growled. ‘She didn’t even look pregnant.’
‘Typical dragon behaviour. Never tell anybody anything.’ I sighed and rested my chin on my hand. ‘Geez. This is really bad.’
John leaned back, his face tight but his eyes burning. ‘Anything else?’
‘Yes,’ I said. ‘Why couldn’t you sense them?’
Leo glanced at John.
‘Nobody could sense them,’ Liu said. ‘They were specifically engineered to appear human right the way through. There was absolutely no demon essence that was visible to any sort of inspection.’
‘Sounds like the fire elementals, except more so,’ I said.
‘Precisely,’ John said.
‘How did you recognise them once you knew then?’ I said. ‘If there’s no demon essence about them?’
‘They are not completely human, and the difference is easy to spot once you are looking for it,’ John said. ‘In the past we only looked for existence of the black demon essence, and if it wasn’t there we could safely assume it was human. Now we can’t; we must look at its human nature as well.’
‘We need to see Helen again,’ I said. ‘Were you awake, stone?’
‘Yes,’ the stone said. ‘I can show you.’
‘First, I must report,’ John said. ‘The residents of the Celestial must be notified about the new demons. Only the Heavens know how far they have infiltrated. I’ve summoned the Tiger, he’ll be here shortly. Then we can examine Helen.’
‘Were you awake when Kitty came to get her from school?’ I said.
‘Yes,’ the stone said.
‘Good, we’ll look at Kitty too. Oh,’ I said, suddenly remembering, ‘was that April?’
‘No,’ the stone said. ‘And it wasn’t a Mother either.’
‘Well then, what the hell was it?’ I said. ‘It sure as hell looked like a Mother.’
‘Something completely new,’ the stone said. ‘You’ll need to devise a name for them, I think.’
The Tiger appeared at the other end of the room and fell to one knee, saluting. ‘Xuan Tian Shang Di.’
‘Emma,’ John said, ‘what the Tiger and I are about to discuss is not for mortal ears. Please.’
‘Come and see yourself in the newspaper, Emma,’ Leo said, rising. ‘There’s a huge story about you on page three of both the English and Chinese papers.’