Page 22 of Yolo


  zoegirl:

  you’d be a fabulous roller derby queen, Mads. you’d rock those high sports socks, and you look awesome in pigtails.

  SnowAngel:

  that was from “Whip It,” right? about the girl who felt like a freak in her small town but made new freak friends in a roller derby league?

  zoegirl:

  and then you almost went surfing, but there was a shark alert. “Soul Surfer”? about the girl who got her arm bitten off?

  SnowAngel:

  I that movie, btw.

  zoegirl:

  and then right around the time Doug broke up with me, you magically became a character in “The Hangover,” from the scene when the guys woke up in a hotel room and found a tiger in the bathroom.

  SnowAngel:

  a tiger that they had to return to that scary dude, which is what you claimed that you and Zara and the Esbees were doing.

  SnowAngel:

  jesus, Zoe. we really *were* stupid, weren’t we?

  zoegirl:

  yep. except . . . she’s Maddie. she made it all sound possible.

  zoegirl:

  you ARE a good liar, Mads, though I’m not sure that’s a skill to be proud of.

  zoegirl:

  and then the ghost hunting night. “Ghostbusters”? “listen, I smell something”??? Ian told us that you two can shoot quotes back and forth from that movie forever.

  SnowAngel:

  and then back to Vegas, sans tiger, only you didn’t really get on the plane because—surprise!—the guy you were with was scared of flying and needed anxiety meds.

  zoegirl:

  the three of us saw “Bridesmaids” together. God.

  SnowAngel:

  and you laughed so hard when everyone got food poisoning from that sketchy Brazilian restaurant.

  SnowAngel:

  I’m surprised u didn’t claim u had to take a dump in the middle of the road.

  zoegirl:

  and then, last but not least, Halloween. I did the zombie crawl, Angela went to a party, and you? you—supposedly—went to a lecture given by the son of a mad scientist WHO THOUGHT HE COULD REANIMATE DEAD PEOPLE.

  zoegirl:

  omigosh.

  zoegirl:

  Ian figured that one out, too. he said the two of you watched “Young Frankenstein” over the summer and loved it.

  SnowAngel:

  which is awesome. yay, movies.

  SnowAngel:

  but Maddie, your life *isn’t* like a movie, is it? your life is stolen from a bunch of different movies.

  zoegirl:

  it’s you sitting around watching Netflix all the time.

  zoegirl:

  AND it’s you totally reneging on the yolo oath.

  SnowAngel:

  but we’re not here to yell at u. right, Zo?

  zoegirl:

  no. but we are upset.

  SnowAngel:

  VERY upset.

  zoegirl:

  mainly we just want u to be ok.

  SnowAngel:

  so be ok. please?

  SnowAngel:

  and we ARE going to get u to Atlanta over Thanksgiving. we haven’t worked out every last detail yet, but we will. tell her, Zoe.

  zoegirl:

  we will. Angela’s stubborn, if you haven’t noticed. she’s forcing me to be gutsy and not give up (normally YOUR job!), so that’s what I’m going to do.

  SnowAngel:

  Zoe, Maddie’s still not saying anything.

  zoegirl:

  no, she’s not.

  SnowAngel:

  Maddie?

  SnowAngel:

  just one little dot? plz plz pretty plz?

  SnowAngel:

  . . .

  SnowAngel:

  . . .

  zoegirl:

  . . . . . . . . .

  SnowAngel:

  le sigh.

  zoegirl:

  we’re here for you, Maddie. just know that.

  SnowAngel:

  Sun, Nov 17, 2:00 AM P.S.T.

  mad maddie:

  .

  Sun, Nov 17, 11:26 AM E.S.T.

  zoegirl:

  oh, Maddie, thank you for your middle-of-the-night text!!!

  zoegirl:

  I’ll take your dots anytime. are you doing any better?

  mad maddie:

  not really. I keep listening to Mumford and Sons and feeling depressed.

  zoegirl:

  I love Mumford and Sons.

  mad maddie:

  that line about dying alone? yep, that’s me.

  mad maddie:

  I know I’m being melodramatic, but I can’t help it. everything sucks.

  zoegirl:

  oh, Maddie.

  zoegirl:

  but the song isn’t about dying alone. the song’s about refusing to die alone.

  mad maddie:

  it is?

  mad maddie:

  no it’s not.

  zoegirl:

  go check. look up the lyrics.

  mad maddie:

  oh

  mad maddie:

  huh

  zoegirl:

  and then later there’s the part about no more tears and no more fears, and how everything will be ok.

  mad maddie:

  whoa. it’s an amazing song—it’s gorgeous—but how weird that I heard it so differently than you.

  zoegirl:

  well . . . you’re depressed, like you said. even though you denied it two seconds later.

  zoegirl:

  but Angela and Ian and I *are* going to figure out a way to get you to Atlanta.

  mad maddie:

  don’t say that. it’s not going to happen, and it just makes me feel bad, like I’m this deadweight you have to carry.

  zoegirl:

  oh, hush

  zoegirl:

  anyway, you don’t get a vote. we don’t have quite enough money yet, but we’re going to raise it somehow. I give you my word.

  mad maddie:

  hmmm. dubious. but sweet gesture, Zo.

  zoegirl:

  don’t give up on us, and don’t give up on you. promise?

  mad maddie:

  can’t promise. but I’ll try.

  zoegirl:

  that’s my girl.

  zoegirl:

  Sun, Nov 17, 12:41 PM E.S.T.

  zoegirl:

  I texted Maddie this morning, and she RESPONDED! miracle of miracles! I gave her my word that we’d raise the money for her ticket, so now we have to.

  SnowAngel:

  we always had to.

  zoegirl:

  how are we going to raise the remaining $280???

  SnowAngel:

  by . . . doing something!

  zoegirl:

  yes, that’s helpful. what sort of something?

  SnowAngel:

  a fundraiser? a Georgia/Ohio fundraiser for an excellent cause?

  SnowAngel:

  I can sell cupcakes on the quad. I’m sure Anna will help me, and I bet Lucy will too. altho I bet her cupcakes will be gross and filled with hemp seeds.

  SnowAngel:

  cld u do something like that too?

  zoegirl:

  I guess

  zoegirl:

  but $280 worth of cupcakes? in four days??? Maddie’s last day of classes before break is this Friday, just like ours.

  SnowAngel:

  well, then snap to it!

  SnowAngel:

  call in all the troops u can think of: Holly, Gannon, whoever.

  SnowAngel:

  GO!

  Tues, Nov 19, 3:50 PM E.S.T.

  SnowAngel:

  hi, Maddie!

  SnowAngel:

  just txting to give u a status report. all ships ahoy, matey!

  SnowAngel:

  altho—shh—I don’t actually know what that means. ahoy? what’s ahoy?

  SnowAngel:

  but in this case, just know that we’re going
to make sure Project Save Maddie is a total winner!

  Tues, Nov 19, 3:54 PM E.S.T.

  SnowAngel:

  Zoe, Project Save Maddie is a total failure. I sold TWO DOZEN FRICKIN CUPCAKES this morning, and guess how much that made?

  SnowAngel:

  a whopping $9.25. yes, u heard me. nine dollars and twenty-five measly cents!

  zoegirl:

  but . . . that’s less than a dollar per cupcake!

  SnowAngel:

  I made a sign that said “Cupcakes for the Cause! Pay What You Can, All Contributions Welcome!”

  SnowAngel:

  which, in retrospect, was possibly not the best strategy with a bunch of poor college students.

  zoegirl:

  well, Gannon, Holly, and I sat at a table in the student center and sold poems for five bucks apiece. only we didn’t sell a single one, so you did better than we did.

  SnowAngel:

  not a high demand for on-the-spot poems?

  zoegirl:

  unfathomable. I know.

  zoegirl:

  but guess who I saw? MY CREATIVE WRITING PROFESSOR.

  SnowAngel:

  the horrible professor?

  SnowAngel:

  the one who said, “hey, you! you don’t get to be a creative writing major!” that one?

  zoegirl:

  yep. she saw Holly and Gannon and me, and I know she did because I SAW her see us. and then she spun around and headed the opposite way.

  SnowAngel:

  wow. great role model for being an adult.

  zoegirl:

  yep. and then a crazy urge came over me, cuz I was with Holly, who is fearless, and cuz I was thinking about Mads, who is fearless (or who is when she’s in her natural state).

  zoegirl:

  I stood up and waved and said, “Professor Crawford! Professor Crawford!”

  SnowAngel:

  um . . . why?

  zoegirl:

  because you were right when you told me that my prof could tell me I couldn’t take the next writing class but that she couldn’t keep me from writing.

  SnowAngel:

  I told you that?

  SnowAngel:

  huh. that was so smart of me! and IT IS TRUE!

  zoegirl:

  so I decided to tell HER that, only when she got to our booth, I totally froze.

  SnowAngel:

  holy shitsnacks. eeeee! nervous!

  zoegirl:

  I know! and if Holly and Gannon hadn’t been there, I’m sure I would have totally chickened out.

  zoegirl:

  they’ve been great, by the way. it could have been weird between us, since they get to take the next class and I don’t. but it isn’t, because we’re not letting it be.

  SnowAngel:

  yay! happy! but I need to know WHAT HAPPENED.

  SnowAngel:

  she came to your booth. you froze. and . . . ?

  zoegirl:

  and she stared at me like, “Can you talk?”

  zoegirl:

  I couldn’t, it seemed, and she started to walk away. then Holly elbowed me HARD, and I said, all shakily, “I just want you to know that I won’t stop writing.”

  SnowAngel:

  Zoe!!! so proud!

  SnowAngel:

  what did your professor say????

  zoegirl:

  she got flustered. it was incredibly uncomfortable. finally she lifted her eyebrows and said, “Good.”

  SnowAngel:

  that’s all? just “good”?

  zoegirl:

  and *then* she walked away.

  zoegirl:

  it’s not as if Professor Crawford is ever going to be a big part of my life, and I know I don’t need her approval, but I’m glad I did it.

  SnowAngel:

  hell yeah! you stood up for yourself!

  zoegirl:

  and saying it out loud—that I’m going to keep writing no matter what—made it so that I *have* to. I said I will, so I will.

  SnowAngel:

  like Maddie’s yolo promise . . .

  zoegirl:

  exactly. but no sad face, because it’s not over till it’s over, right?

  zoegirl:

  and I do have another $50 for the fund. Gannon and Holly gave me $25 each.

  SnowAngel:

  awww, so sweet!

  zoegirl:

  I felt a little wrong accepting their money, but then I didn’t.

  SnowAngel:

  Reid’s going to chip in too.

  SnowAngel:

  we have good friends, don’t we?

  zoegirl:

  we do. we’re very lucky.

  SnowAngel:

  but our best friend is still in Santa Cruz in a closet somewhere. so back to it!

  Wed, Nov 20, 1:03 PM P.S.T.

  mad maddie:

  hey, Zoe and Angela. stop beating yrselves up, cuz I know u are. u think it’s somehow your fault that I’m going to be stuck here in California with the dorm rats and the homeless ppl, but it’s not.

  mad maddie:

  huh

  mad maddie:

  I just reread that text and am now realizing that I prolly sounded . . . well, not overly convincing.

  mad maddie:

  just trying for gallows humor, I guess.

  mad maddie:

  it means SO MUCH to me that y’all even tried.

  mad maddie:

  and, thx to Angela, I now know that homeless ppl can make excellent friends!

  mad maddie:

  I will be thankful for that, and thankful that I will not be sleeping behind a dumpster like Jermaine.

  mad maddie:

  it’s all good. really.

  Thu, Nov 21, 4:00 PM E.S.T.

  SnowAngel:

  Zoe . . . something is happening. something big and . . . strange and wonderful, and—

  SnowAngel:

  do you believe in miracles?

  zoegirl:

  sometimes. in theory.

  zoegirl:

  what’s going on?

  SnowAngel:

  I know that ppl usually talk about Christmas miracles, but I’m in the middle of a Thanksgiving miracle. remember my business class and how I had to make a fake business? and so I made up Fashion Rescue: For the Girl on the Run!

  zoegirl:

  yes . . .

  SnowAngel:

  WELL, Lucy and Anna made up fliers and wrote testimonials and stuff. they posted them all over campus, and Anna passed them out to everyone in the Zeta house.

  SnowAngel:

  they know how worried I’ve been about Maddie, and they wanted to do something too, just like Holly and Gannon did.

  SnowAngel:

  and now I’m tearing up. ACK.

  zoegirl:

  wait wait wait! why are you tearing up? WHAT’S GOING ON?

  SnowAngel:

  also, I told Anna I was taking a VERY QUICK break—she’s being, like, my set-up-appointments person—so I’ve gotta make this fast and get back to the next person.

  SnowAngel:

  we’re $85 closer, Zo! I’m giving fashion advice and helping ppl reinvent themselves AND THEY’RE PAYING ME FOR IT!

  zoegirl:

  no way!

  SnowAngel:

  way!

  SnowAngel:

  thank you, Business 101! thank you, Professor Business Lady! I might even take Business 202 if there is such a thing, and grow up to be a Business Lady myself one day!!!!

  zoegirl:

  you’re making money and you have appointments and you’re a fashion consultant? I kind of think you already ARE a business lady, Angela!!!

  SnowAngel:

  ooo, really? cool!

  SnowAngel:

  lots of my clients are Zetas, which I’m somewhat blown away by. Anna wrote “Sisters for Sisters” on the flyers she handed out at the Zeta house, and even tho I depledged, they’re still helping out.

  zoegirl:

&nb
sp; all of them? even the jerky ones?

  SnowAngel:

  well, no. just the nice ones. but there are enough nice ones to make a difference.

  SnowAngel:

  they’re lined up outside my room just waiting to give me money!

  zoegirl:

  to help Maddie?

  SnowAngel:

  no, to pay for the service I’m offering. (and I AM good at this stuff. every one of my clients has left happy.)

  SnowAngel:

  but also for Maddie, since that’s what the money’s for.