What am I supposed to do now? She'd asked herself the same question multiple times over the past two weeks and still had no answer or idea how to figure it out. Entering the kitchen, she turned on the stove. Even though it was Friday evening, she was still at home. In fact these days she hardly left her townhouse. Instead she stayed safely hidden away from everyone. And while it was a self-imposed confinement, she hadn't adjusted to it. Since joining David Healy's campaign she'd eaten, slept, and breathed politics. Now that her political career and Christopher were gone, gaping voids were left in her life.
Leaving her position as David's chief of staff had been one of the most difficult things she'd ever done, yet she'd had no choice. As much as she loved working on the Hill, she couldn't continue working for David after the way he manipulated her. Which brought her back to her unanswered question—what was she supposed to do now?
Maybe if she got some sleep she could sort her future out, but sleep refused to come, despite the absolute exhaustion plaguing her body. Instead her thoughts constantly returned to Christopher. They hadn't spoken since the evening she confronted him in her townhouse. He hadn’t called or texted, and neither had she.
Right after their argument she'd expected him to call and try to convince her she was wrong. As the days passed and he didn't call she realized that he didn't intend to. In her book that only further proved his guilt. If he hadn't used her wouldn't he defend himself? His lack of effort meant either he was guilty or just didn't care.
Either way it was over between them. Her head knew it, now if she could only get her heart on the same page, maybe her world would return to normal, or something close to normal. But how does someone do that, Sara wondered getting up to make her tea?
She couldn't throw herself into her work anymore. What else did she have? Maybe the key was to get out more, even if only to see family. She'd canceled plans with Jake twice, both times via text message. It'd been easier that way. Over the phone he would know something was wrong and drag it out of her. In fact she hadn't spoken to him once since the breakup. With a text message she could tell him she didn't feel well and he wouldn’t know the difference. At least that worked for now. Eventually, he would get suspicious and start asking questions and she'd have to tell him everything. The thought of it made her sick to her stomach. She always fell into the same trap with men. Although she'd never tell Jake the real reason their relationship ended; it was possible that Christopher had already told her brother about the breakup. A brief jolt of sympathy shot through her. When Jake found out Christopher manipulated her, it would end their friendship.
“It's not my fault if it does.” Sara carried her tea into her bedroom and flicked on the lamp. The soft light bounced off the pale pink walls casting a warm glow. “He should have thought of that before.” The guilt remained, gnawing at her insides despite her words. Even if his actions had led to the end of their relationship, perhaps she should have thought harder about how their involvement would affect Jake. At the time she'd put very little thought into it at all. Had Christopher?
Slipping into her favorite pajamas, she grabbed her book. Time with a good novel and a hot cup of tea might help distract her and push all thoughts of Jake and Christopher from her mind for a bit. When the doorbell chimed, Sara froze in place, her heart beating fast. No one came by without calling her first, not even her mother.
Tossing her book down, Sara pressed the button under the security screen near her bed. The console gave her access to the video monitor posted outside her front door. She almost expected to see Christopher there, but instead she found Jake standing on the front steps. With a groan she released the breath she'd been holding. What did he want? Had he realized she'd gone out of her way to avoid him? She'd known it would happen at some point, but hoped it'd take him a bit more time.
Maybe if I take my time answering the door he'll go away. No sooner did the thought pass through her head and the doorbell rang again. Evidently, her brother planned to be stubborn tonight. “The sooner I answer, the sooner he'll leave me in peace,” she said as she walked to the door.
“Took you long enough,” Jake said rather than give her a proper greeting when she opened the door.
“I was getting changed,” she answered.
He gave her a once-over before his eyes settled back on her face. “You look like hell. Are you sick?” He walked into the living room and sat on the love seat without being invited inside.
“Thanks, you really know how to make me feel good.” Someone needed to remind her brother of the old saying: if you don't have anything good to say, don't say anything at all.
Jake propped his feet on the coffee table. “Well you do. Are you feeling okay?” True brotherly concern filled his voice this time.
“I'm fine. Just busy.” Sara perched herself on the edge of the chair next to him.
“Then what's with canceling dinner and not returning my calls?”
Before he'd walked through the door, her brother had known the status of her health. He'd been trying to catch her in a lie and succeeded. She knew his ways well and should have picked her words more carefully.
“Like I said, I'm busy. You're not the only one with responsibilities,” she answered. Her defenses automatically went into play.
“Never said you didn't, but something is up. Both you and Christopher are avoiding me like the plague. So what gives?”
“We haven't talked in weeks. You'll have to ask him what his problem is.”
Jake's feet hit the floor and he straightened up. “What happened?” he asked, his voice turning cold.
Sara looked down at her hands folded in her lap. Should she keep the answer short and sweet or give him all the details. The less information she gave, the less a fool she'd look for letting a man use her again. “I ended things. It just wasn't working.” Omitting the truth wouldn't hurt anyone.
Jake's eyebrow went up and he gave her a look that said bullshit. “Not buying it, sis. What happened?”
“It's not important. Let it go.” Jake's insistence on knowing the details irked her. She'd never nosed around his relationships.
“Any other time fine, but not now.” Jake crossed his arms across his chest.
She envisioned herself tossing the crystal vase of flowers at her brother's head. Whatever happened with Christopher wasn't any of his business. But she knew he'd stick around until she gave him some details.
“You heard that the education initiative passed right? Did you know that Hall Technology was awarded the government contract associated with it?” Sara asked with as reasonable a voice as she could manage, considering the jumble of emotions simmering inside.
Jake shrugged one shoulder. “I didn't know, but it makes sense that Christopher would go for the contract.”
“Have you noticed that the value of Hall Technology's stock spiked?” Sara watched his face for any reaction to her words.
“I own stock in the company, of course I noticed. But what does that have to do with you and him?”
Evidently she needed to spell it out for him. “All of that is because of me. Both he and David used me to get what they wanted. There wouldn't even be a contract, if I hadn't attached the Sherbrooke name to the education initiative. And his stocks only spiked after the company got the contract.”
“Have you been putting something besides sugar in your tea, Sara?” he asked leaning toward her, confusion in his eyes. “Christopher wouldn't use you like that. That's not the kind of guy he is.”
Sara held back a snort. How dare he defend Christopher? “Why else would he have urged me to support the education plan? He knew the likelihood of getting it through the Senate was slim without the Sherbrooke name attached. And what else could've caused such a spike in stock value if not the announcement that Hall Technology won the contract? I don't believe for a second it was all a coincidence.”
Jake gave her a look of pity. “The stock started to go up around the time Hall Technology announced its plan to buy a Japanese techno
logy company. No matter what you think, he never would have asked for your public support of the initiative because he wanted the government contract. He would've supported that type of thing even if no monetary gain was involved.”
She'd expected Jake to be angry with Christopher, not defend him. "Believe what you want, Jake. It doesn't matter anyway." If he wanted to side with Christopher, she wasn't going to make a big deal about it.
Jake reached for her tightly balled-up hand. "Phillip would've done those things. Not Christopher,” he said his voice gentle and understanding.
"You have your opinion and I have mine." Up until two weeks ago, she would've agreed with her brother but not anymore. While Christopher wasn't trying to ruin her father by using her like Phillip, he still ranked up there on her list of jerks.
"Come on, Sara. You really believe he'd use you in any way to help his company? Don't you think he would've tried something before now? I mean I've known him for years and he's never pulled anything like that with me."
Her brother's tone of voice told her exactly what he thought of her assumptions, but just because he didn't agree with her, didn't mean she was wrong. "Please let it go, Jake. It doesn't matter anyway." Sara rubbed her temple with her hand. The headache she'd fought all day was back.
"Sure. You look like you don't care," Jake answered sarcastically giving her the once-over.
If she asked him to leave what were the chances he would go? Knowing Jake, not very high. He tended to do things his way. Most days she loved that about him. Not today though. "I know he's your friend but butt out Jake." Sara let her annoyance seep into her voice. "When you were on the outs with Charlie, I didn't give you advice."
Jake threw up his hands. "Whatever. If you want to act like an idiot go ahead. When you're ready to talk you know where I am."