I nodded. It was annoying to not know what had happened with Mitch, Larry, and Evan, but the promise of the storm moving on was at least something positive. I looked around the room for Josh and found him across the room talking to some of the other patrol officers. He shot me a small smile but continued his conversation. The morning flew by as we put the station back in working order. The guys were all anxious to get outside to assess the damage in the surrounding area, but the standing order had been to stay put until we heard from John or Mitch.
Relief finally came when the power was restored and the lights flickered on. The air conditioner hummed to life, which helped with the comfort level in the building almost immediately. With power came the phone lines and computers. Vanessa picked up the phone with a shaky hand and called Mitch's cell number, but it was no use. Cell service had not been restored yet. She also tried raising both Mitch and John on the radio, but neither answered.
"Damn it. What good is a radio if nobody uses it?" she asked desperately.
She was clearly at the end of her rope, like many of us were. "How long have you been together?" I asked, hoping that talking about it would offer a bit of a distraction.
She took a deep breath and exhaled before answering. "Two years. We haven't told anyone since, technically, Mitch is my boss, but I'm pretty sure everyone knows. We started off as friends. I was there for him when his wife passed away, and he was there for me when my husband left me. It took us a long time, but once we clicked there was no going back."
"Are you going to get married?" I asked.
"I never wanted to. We've both been down that road, but after last night, I'm rethinking that," she said, sounding distressed. "If he's okay," she whispered, brushing a tear off her cheek.
"He is okay. You have to believe that," I said, patting her hand.
"I pray you're right, but with this job there will always be risks."
I was sorry I started the conversation. Her words didn't seem to fill the void like I hoped they would, for either of us. Silence was our ally at the moment.
The direct phone line at her desk rang, making us both practically jump from our chairs. It could have been anyone calling, but judging by the questions she was asking and the tears in her eyes, it was Mitch. Trying to eavesdrop on a one-sided phone conversation was torture, especially with everyone who had been milling around crowded along her desk. When she gasped, placing a hand over her mouth and her eyes widened, I wanted to rip the phone from her hand.
"Should I notify his family?" she asked. "Fine, I'll let everyone know," she said before hanging up the phone. Buttercup stepped in and gently held my hand as we waited for the verdict.
Vanessa took a deep breath to gather herself before speaking. "John is on his way back now, but there was an accident during the rescue," she said as tears coursed down her cheeks. "When Mitch returned to the truck to call in confirmation of their location, Larry went out into the water against his orders. The waves were too violent, and he was unable to reach the surfer before the rip current pulled him out also. With such limited visibility, it was too risky for Mitch to go in alone after him. The Coast Guard reached their location approximately twenty minutes later, but it was too late. They weren't able to locate the surfer and by the time they got to Larry, he had asphyxiated a large quantity of water," she said, swiping a hand across her cheek. You could have heard a pin drop in the room. "He died an hour ago at the hospital," she finally said, sinking back down in her chair.
The news was staggering. My face fell into my hands and I couldn't stop my tears from falling. I felt terrible for Larry and the pain his family would endure. And Evan. The fact that he hadn't been found made things so much worse. As a parent, how could you live with that?
Mitch arrived at the station a couple hours later, looking broken and defeated. The crew remained silent as he walked in. A low murmur of grief circulated through the room as everyone shook Mitch's hand, offering condolences over their fallen comrade. Struggling to maintain his composure, Mitch said a few words before heading to his office. Vanessa quietly followed him and closed the door behind her. My eyes looked only to Josh, who stood devastated against the wall. I walked into his arms and held him tightly as he buried his face in my neck.
Unfortunately, now that the storm had moved north, operations switched swiftly into recovery mode as reports began coming in about damage, downed trees, and other debris, along with blocked or flooded roadways. The station buzzed with activity as Mitch barked out orders, sending crews to investigate and report back on the status of the county beaches. He also tried to talk Butch and Buttercup into taking me home so we all could get some rest, but I refused. There was too much adrenaline in my system to rest. Instead, I went with Josh to survey the damage on the stretch of beach near my house while Butch and Buttercup headed out to make sure we still had a home.
I was relieved to get out of the confines of the patrol office since I was going stir-crazy after being cooped up for so long. The weather outside was mild compared to what the hurricane had provided. The sun was shining and a gentle breeze blew through my hair. "Are you okay?" I asked as we climbed onto the ATV.
He nodded before shaking his head. "It's pretty awful. Mitch told me that Larry's two kids showed up at the hospital. They took the news hard, obviously. My dad and I don't have the best relationship, but I know I don't ever want to be in their position. What about you? You haven't mentioned Evan yet." He looked tentatively at me.
"I know what everyone thinks of Evan. Considering his stupidity is the reason Larry is dead, I can't blame them. I hate him for that too. But at the same time, I keep thinking that the fact they never found him means he's going to show up safe and sound. Stupid, right?"
Josh merely shrugged, keeping his eyes forward as he drove.
"I hardly knew Evan. Hell, technically we weren't even friends, but in spite of what a dick he could be, I think we could have been. I know you don't like hearing that, but I think if Evan hung with a different crowd, he'd be a different person. It's funny. Back home in Kansas I used to think that if we had a little more money our lives would be so much better. I guess I figured the wealthier you were the fewer problems you had. Obviously not in Evan's case. He just wanted his dad's approval. Simple as that."
Josh remained silent as he maneuvered the ATV around a picnic table that was lying on its side. "I can appreciate that," he finally said as we jumped from the ATV to set the table upright. "I still think he was a dick like you said, but that doesn't mean I wanted anything to happen to him." I nodded, trying to keep myself from breaking down.
"I'm scared," I admitted.
"I know. I wish I could help."
"You have your own pain," I said, squeezing his hand briefly before climbing onto the ATV. Josh sniffed slightly, hiding his grief behind his sunglasses. The event was tragic no matter what spin you put on it. At least one death had occurred—well, likely two—and those of us that cared would suffer.
Josh maneuvered the ATV down the access path to the beach where we found that the hurricane-caliber winds had left a huge mess. Anything in the vicinity that hadn't been tied down was strewn about. Even things that had been secured were now torn apart.
"Holy crap. It looks like a bomb went off," I said, shell shocked from all the damage. "I don't even know where we would start."
"Anywhere," Josh said, handing me a pair of gloves. "Whatever we do will at least make a dent. Unless you'd rather I drive you home to wait."
After yesterday, I'd had more than enough waiting, and it sucked. The thought of putting myself through that again made me nauseous. I shook my head. I didn't want to go home. For what? To sit in my room and stare at the spot Evan had been. The spot where he had still been alive. "No. I don't want to go home," I answered, pulling my gloves on.
We both dove into our work, knowing it was the best way to stay distracted. Anything that didn't belong on the beach we dragged into piles for salvage crews to sort through. It was hot, sticky work despite the cool b
reeze. Occasionally, Josh and I would walk down to the waves and splash some water on our arms to cool off. After a couple hours, I hated to admit it, but the lack of a full night's sleep had caught up to me. Josh seemed to have a lot more energy and worked tirelessly even after I began to drag. He was like a machine. I could tell he wanted to keep working. It was probably his way of coping with what had happened, but I had reached the point where I could barely move.
He took us back to the station and then drove me home in his truck. The roads remained flooded with water and debris, so it took twice as long to get there. When we arrived there was a huge pile of palm fronds, tree branches, and broken pieces of wood sitting in the driveway. Eyeing the huge pile, I noticed that the pieces of wood were white. Maybe it was because I was so tired, but it took me a minute to put together the fact that the gazebo no longer sat in the backyard. Tears filled my eyes before spilling over. It felt ridiculous to be crying over a silly gazebo after everything else that had happened, but the tears would not stop. Josh pulled me into his arms, tucking my head onto his shoulder. Sobs shook my body, bubbling out like lava from a volcano that had finally erupted. My crying had nothing to do with the stupid gazebo. It was over damage that surrounded us everywhere we looked. And even more importantly, I cried for the loss of two people we both knew. It was overwhelming.
Josh held me until I finally calmed down, my tearful sobs turning to sporadic hiccups. "It's going to be okay," he murmured, stoking his hand over my hair.
I nodded even though I didn't see how everything would be okay. My life felt like it had been turned upside down.
After a few minutes I scrubbed my hands over my cheeks, wincing in pain when my swollen eye reminded me to go easy when touching it. My cheeks felt flushed and hot from the tears that had burned their way down them.
"Thank you," I said when I felt more in control.
Josh wiped a remaining tear from my good eye with his finger. Leaning in like he wanted a kiss, he surprised me by pulling me in for a tight hug. "I think your parents are waiting for you," he said.
I glanced over his shoulder and saw Butch standing on the front porch. He had removed the plywood from the windows, and they were all open, so I was guessing the power hadn't been restored to our neighborhood yet. "You want to come in for a while?" I asked, climbing out of his truck.
"Yeah, I'll come in for a little while before I head to my house. Mitch told me to take the rest of the day off to recoup."
"You look beat," Buttercup greeted us as we wiped our feet on the doormat.
"I am," I answered, followed by a big yawn that caused my cheek to object in pain. I placed my finger over it, hoping to dispel the throbbing.
"At least you can open your eye a little more today."
"True, but I'm not digging the color."
"You wear it well," Butch said, giving my shoulder a pat.
"How you doing, Josh?" Buttercup asked as we pulled up chairs to the kitchen table. Butch filled two glasses with ice from a cooler and filled them with lemonade Buttercup had prepared.
"Not my best day," he answered, reaching for my hand. "I kinda feel like it's all part of a nightmare. Larry was a great guy and I enjoyed working with him."
"I'm sure," Buttercup answered, patting his free hand.
Butch asked him a few questions about Larry's kids, but changed the subject when Josh appeared to be choking up. The whole thing felt surreal since I'd never known anyone who had died. Except for my grandparents, but I had never met them. This was so much different. Just yesterday afternoon I had been joking with Larry. It was insane how life could change in the blink of an eye.
"Hey, are you guys hungry?" Buttercup asked, rising from her chair.
Josh and I both agreed that we could eat, so Buttercup buzzed around the kitchen, preparing a late-afternoon cold lunch. Our conversation shifted to lighter and more superficial topics. The last forty-eight hours had brought a roller coaster ride of emotions, and I think we needed a break.
After eating, we helped Buttercup clean up, and I walked Josh out to his truck on the way to my room. I was so tired my bed was practically calling my name.
"I'll see you tomorrow," Josh said. "I thought maybe we could just hang out tomorrow night."
"I'd like that," I answered, looking up at him. I wanted to kiss him, but in light of the situation I wasn't sure if that would seem insensitive. Somehow I sensed that it would make me feel better, less disjointed, but I couldn't speak for Josh.
He must have read my thoughts because he stepped in close, pulling me into his arms. "Is this okay?" he asked.
I nodded with my heart in my throat. His handsome face moved closer as my eyelids drifted slowly closed. I sighed with pleasure, feeling his lips gently caress mine. A kiss didn't hold magical powers. Unless, of course, you believed in fairy tales, but somehow Josh's kiss held the power to heal me. The pinching of my heart loosened enough so that each grieving beat felt less painful. My mind released the agonizing thoughts that had threatened to drown my soul and I began to feel whole again.
To say what Josh had given me was only a kiss would be stating a half-truth. In reality, it was so much more than that. It was a new beginning. It felt like hope.
Chapter 15
Josh came by to pick us up the next morning and we arrived to find the station back in working order. It was as if the last few days had never happened with the exception of the black drape Vanessa had attached to the door, along with an announcement regarding Larry's funeral service. It was glaring evidence that some healing needed to be done.
I knew as soon as we walked through the front doors and everyone suddenly stared at me that they had news. Reaching for the handle on the door, I fought the urge to back out the same way we had come in. Buttercup reached for my hand, sensing that I would need her.
Pasting on a brave face, I stood up straight and stated the inevitable. "They found him."
"This morning," Mitch said, nodding as he rubbed a hand over his unshaven face. He looked rough. I couldn't help wondering when he had last slept.
A lump the size of my fist moved to my throat, but I swallowed it back. There was no way I would break down again. Not now, and especially not here. There was already enough sorrow in the room over Larry.
"Are Josh and I working the beach?" I croaked, thankful to have gotten the words out.
Mitch opened his mouth to say something before abruptly closing it. "Yeah, we'll be sending all of you out there. The city manager is sending in crews too, so there should be plenty of help."
I nodded, turning on heel and heading for the back door. I needed to get away from all the eyes staring at me.
"You okay?" Josh asked when he joined me.
"I'm fine."
He looked skeptical as we climbed onto the ATV.
I shrugged. "This is my brave face," I said. "Believe me, I'll be all right."
He patted my knee and steered the ATV away from the station. Despite the damage caused by the storm, the roads were busy with cleanup crews and residents trickling back into town to survey the damage to their homes. Crews from the utility company were busily working on all the downed electrical lines. I hoped that meant power would be restored soon. Butch and Buttercup may have been able to survive without it, but I needed my modern comforts.
Josh and I headed to a nearby stretch of beach near the boardwalk where more cleanup crews joined us. "Wow," I said, taking in the number of people lying in the sand and playing in the water like it was any other day. The many small business owners were busy making quick work of cleaning up the area around their shops for the tourists and other patrons who were scattered about. Why wouldn't they? The storm had passed and life moved on.
"It's what we do," Josh said, dragging the broken half of a surfboard to our overflowing pile of rubbish. For a brief moment I wondered if the board had belonged to Evan, but I knew that was crazy, morbid thinking.
"That's cool," I replied with a bead of sweat trickling down my temple.
"The beaches are here for our enjoyment after all."
"As long as we do our part to preserve them," he reminded me. That was Josh for you. Always the Boy Scout. Although, that was one of the reasons I was falling for him. He had passion and that was something everyone needed.
"It's going to take us forever to preserve this one," I said, seeing a lot of work that needed to be done.
Josh nodded to a worker in an orange vest who had asked about bringing in a truck for the piles we had created. "Nah, it'll be back to normal before you know it," he said, addressing my comment. "Just think about all the community service hours you're busting out. I'm probably not supposed to tell you this, but I think Mitch plans on writing a letter to the judge to tell him how helpful you've been through this crisis to see about getting your sentence reduced."
I shrugged. "If they don't, it's okay. I like working with y—well, there," I added lamely, almost spilling my guts to him. He didn't need to know how much I liked seeing him every day.
He stopped to look at me. "You know I haven't forgotten what we talked about, right? This is not my idea of a date."
"Thank god, otherwise we would have a serious problem," I teased. "Honestly, I just like seeing you every day," I admitted, trying not to blush. I swear he turned me into a total sap.
"I like seeing you too," he said, wiping a smudge of sand from my cheek.
My heart swooned over his words. It felt wrong to be even a little bit happy after everything that had happened, but there was a lighter feeling in my chest.
The hours of the day ticked away. Clearing the beach was grueling and hot, but with the help of the city work crews we got the area cleaned up for miles in either direction of the boardwalk. In spite of all the reports we had heard about possible erosion, Josh seemed to think the beach had held up pretty well. Most of the houses and hotels that sat directly on the beach looked to be in good shape with no visible damage.
When we arrived back at the station I found out Butch and Buttercup had left earlier in the day, getting a ride home from another patrol officer so they could pitch in at cleaning up our own street.