“Is today your payday?” she asked briefly, practically skipping out to the bathroom. Salmon was one of her favorite dishes.
When she was done, she sat down at the dinner table. Her eyes trailed to the opposite wall.
“It's August,” she pointed out.
"What?"
"It’s August. Isn't it supposed to be June?" Kali stared at the calendar pinned to the wall. "Is that thing printed wrong? Where are the other pages?"
"Well," he sat down across from her. “No, the calendar is right.”
"What aren't you telling me?” she threateningly pulled on his collar. "Why are there two months missing from my life?"
He'd forgotten to come up with an alibi sooner. "There was a motorcycle accident. We were riding back from the park, and there was this on-coming truck… and anyways, you got a minor concussion. The doctor said it would be normal for you to forget a couple of things.”
"A head injury, huh?” She put her fingers to her temples. "No wonder my head’s been throbbing this morning.”
He wiped the sweats from his forehead when she didn't question him further.
Her attention was diverted to the dinner in front of her. “Looks delicious!”
She nibbled on a piece of salmon for a moment, but the smell of it suddenly made her feel nauseous. Her hands flew to her mouth. She tripped on her chair as she bolted toward the bathroom.
Chevalier followed her. Standing in the doorway, he watched her with obvious concern. Kali had never had a problem with his cooking before. The salmon was fresh from the market. She was kneeling over the toilet, vomiting until he expected to see her toenails come out of her mouth.
His eyes widened at the realization hit.
†††††
Chevalier sat in the dark of the living room, his head buried in his hands. How had things come to this? Just when he thought he’d have a peaceful life with her, she might be…
She might be pregnant. He felt angry, but more than that, he felt regret. If he’d been more honest with his feelings before, that demon could never have come between them. His own conscience had always held him back.
He had always known he was in love with her. The seven year gap between them may seem insignificant to people her own age, but that difference could mean tremendous growth, both physically and mentally. And so he had patiently waited for her to grow up. He had waited patiently until she could at least understand. There had been nights that his youth led him to the beds of other women. The whole time, his mind was filled with nothing but guilty thoughts of her.
It became worse when she came to live with him. The years refused to move forward. Looking back, he wished he could have done things differently. If he had known there would be days like these, he would have ripped out his heart for her to see. Then she could have judged for herself. It should never have been a secret.
She betrayed you, the voice in his head said. She might be carrying his child. What will you do now?
“I don’t know,” he answered the voice. “I just don’t know.”
Kill her. The voice said. It’ll make you feel better. It’ll save you from your pain.
“Shut up!” Chevalier shook his head violently. “I would never hurt her!”
Will you force her to abort it?
Chevalier squeezed his eyes shut. The tears that were burning his eyes spilled down his cheeks. “How could I make her do such a thing?” he said, his voice trembling.
Will you raise it, then? Could you ever love a child that belongs to another man?
Chevalier took a deep breath and stood up. He walked slowly to Kali’s bedroom. He sat beside her bed and held her hand in his. She looked so peaceful when she slept. He turned her hand over and kissed her frail fingers.
“I love her,” he sighed. "If it is her child, what difference would it makes if it’s mine or another's?”
You must be crazy!
“Maybe I am,” his tears fell onto her palm. “I love her so much that it’s making me feel like I’m crazy!”
†††††
Kali tossed and turned in her bed, troubled by the recurring images in her dreams. They played over and over each night, in bits and pieces like the shards of a broken mirror. She couldn’t make sense of the jumbled images of people and places, real and imaginary. She was beginning to curse these manifestations of her overactive imagination. She could hear bits and pieces of dialogue that raised more questions than answers. Sometimes, she could hear a stranger’s familiar voice reaching out to her. The voice was as soft as a whisper and inexplicably harmonized with her heartbeats.
Suddenly a loud, annoying pounding on the front brought her fully awake. She could hear Chevalier getting up from the sofa where he slept to answer the door. She relaxed again when a long moment passed without any suspicious noises.
Hana stood in the apartment’s doorway, her hands on her hips. As soon as she saw Chevalier, she wrapped her arms around his neck.
“I’m so happy to see you!” Hana said and launched herself up to kiss him. He wasn’t responding; she felt like she was kissing a statue. She stopped and pulled back. “Aren't you happy to see me?” she asked, questioning his aloofness.
“Lower your voice,” Chevalier shushed her.
“Why?” Hana’s brows pulled together so that they almost looked connected in the center. “Is there someone in your apartment? It is another woman?”
She barged into his apartment and began to search. She scanned the kitchen quickly before searching the bathroom and then the only bedroom in the place.
“Kali?!” she exclaimed when she found a woman in her lover’s bed. Shock resonated in her voice.
Kali sat up and smiled when she saw Hana. “What are you doing here, Hana?” she asked.
Hana looked to Chevalier, who was sluggishly entering the bedroom. “What is she doing here?”
“What do you mean, what is she doing here?” Chevalier yawned. “She lives here. The question is what are you doing here?"
“But didn’t you elope with Lucien?” Hana asked Kali.
Kali blinked. “Who’s Lucien?”
“Nobody,” Chevalier quickly replied. He turned to Hana. “Go home already, Hana. We’ll talk about this later.”
“No!” she protested. Anger and tears were already swelled up in her brown eyes. “Why is she still living with you? She was supposed to be gone!”
“Chevalier,” his name from Kali’s mouth sounded like a warning. “What is going on here? Since when did you and Hana… you know?”
“It was very brief,” Chevalier smiled playfully.
Kali shook her head, disapproving. “Why are you doing this to my friend?”
“Your friend?” she strode to Kali and delivered a slap across her face. “Who are you calling your friend? I don’t even want to know you exist! You disgust me!”
Chevalier caught her by the wrist and pushed her out into the living room. "What the hell was that for? I’m the one you should be angry with.”
“Stop protecting that bitch!”
“If you hurt her again, I won’t hold back,” he threatened. Realizing he wasn’t the kind of man who would threaten a girl, he let out a sigh. “Kali is very weak right now. Go home, Hana. We’ll talk later.”
"All that ever comes out of your mouth is 'Kali'!" Hana said hysterically. "All you see is her, but I'm the one you're going out with! How could you cheat on me like this?"
“That’s enough!” Chevalier decided. He grabbed Hana by the hand and pulled her out of to the hallway.
“I’m sorry I didn’t make it clear enough to you,” he said once they were outside the apartment. “I’ll make it clearer this time. I’m breaking up with you. I’m an asshole, so forget about me.”
Chevalier went back inside the apartment and shut the door in Hana’s face. She kept banging on the door, but no one answered except a little old lady down the hallway who poked her head out of her apartment to see what the fuss was about.
Kal
i stared at Chevalier when he returned. “That was rude.”
"She'll get over me soon enough.”
“Like your other women? You’re really a jerk.”
“Yeah,” he bent down to place a kiss on her cheek, “but I don’t want to be other women’s jerk anymore.”
Chapter 14: Her Lovers
Kali’s hands flew to her mouth as she felt her lunch backing up. She dashed out of the classroom and down the hall, intent on getting to the bathroom. Charging into an empty stall, everything her stomach made a rapid reappearance. She grabbed a handful of tissue and wiped her lips.
She had been feeling sick too often lately, nauseous to be precise. She could barely keep anything down anymore. Other times she felt extremely dizzy just from standing up. If this got worse, she would need to find a doctor. The thought of going to a doctor frightened her, though. The expense would be a burden on Chevalier, and if they found something wrong with her, they may put her on some expensive treatments. If she could hold it off, the longer the better. At least until she found a new job.
She was startled when the door suddenly opened. Hana, along with some other girls she recognized, were standing in front of her.
"You're pregnant, aren't you?” Hana asked, straightforward.
The question made her jump.
"I'm not-" Kali reached down to her abdomen. Her symptoms were very similar to those of a pregnant woman, but it couldn't be...could it? It couldn’t be! She wasn’t even dating anyone. How could that possibly be an acceptable scenario?
"Don't lie to us, we already know," Cyn said. "You’ve been throwing up a lot lately. You’re totally pregnant.”
Hana grabbed a handle of Kali’s hair, yanking her closer. "Whose it is? It is Chevalier’s or Lucien’s? Or maybe you just don't know, you slut!"
"Let go of me!" Kali shouted and forcing her fingers under Hana’s to reclaim her roots. She pushed Hana back. “Who is this Lucien you’re talking about?”
"Are you just going to pretend you don't know him?"
"What do you want?" Kali stood up. "Even if I am pregnant, it has nothing to do with you!"
"If it’s Chevalier's, I'll kill you!" Hana raised her hand and slapped Kali across the face. "You will not steal my boyfriend!"
Kali placed a hand over her rapidly swelling cheek, feeling angry and guilty. She wasn’t even sure why.
"I couldn’t steal something that was already mine!" she blurted out. "If I wanted him, I just need to say one word he would come running to me without a second thought!"
Hana raised her hand a second time, but Kali caught her wrist and pushed it aside. "I’ve had enough slaps from you to last a lifetime,” she said, exiting the bathroom.
†††††
Kali lowered her eyes. The old woman at the convenience store was staring at her eyes full of condemnation, deliberately ringing out her order as slowly as possible. She quickly paid the woman, grabbed the pregnancy test without waiting for it to be bagged, and bolted. Running to the side of the store, she leaned against the wall to control her rapid panting. Her face was flushed with embarrassment. She shoved the test into her bag and finally built up her courage enough to dart across the street.
Nervously, she entered a small café several blocks away and ordered a bottle of water. She sat down on the chair for a short moment, gathering herself before she snuck into the bathroom when the clerk had turned away. She scanned the bathroom first, then walked to the last bathroom stall and locked the door carefully. Releasing the breath she had been holding, she retrieved the pregnancy test from her bag and opened it.
Her hands were trembling as she held the applicator in her hands. She took the time to read the directions on the little paper that came with it then followed the directions. Closing the toilet lid, she sat on it for the full five minutes. Dozens of thoughts raced through her mind during those five minutes. At the end, if felt as if she’d been there for hours. With another deep breath, she picked the applicator up off the plastic in her lap to read the result.
The applicator dropped the floor. She was going to faint. The result was positive, confirming her suspicions, but how could that be possible? She couldn’t be pregnant! It wasn’t possible! Who was the father?
She found herself crying softly. Fear and confusion battled in her head. What had happened in those two missing months? Has she fallen in love? Was she raped? Why couldn’t she remember? How could she forget something so important? She let out a sob and lowered her head. How could she go home like this?
†††††
He couldn’t find her. Chevalier was becoming more frustrated as the hours ticked by. She hadn’t come home and didn’t even bother to call. He had looked everywhere for her, but it was like finding a needle in a haystack in this city. Where could she have gone? She had nowhere to go. If anything happened to her, what would he do?
He couldn’t face that yet. He could not allow those thoughts to distract him. He had to find her, and quickly before she got herself into trouble and he couldn’t protect her. Think, Chevalier, where would that girl have gone? Thinking hard, he remembered a few places she would go before the whole Lucifer debacle, and he decided to search each one.
He was relieved when he found her sitting by herself on the beach. He approached her, took off his jacket, and placed it around her frail shoulders. Her face was covered in tears.
"You shouldn’t do that to me,” he said in a soft voice. "You know I panic easily. What’s going on?"
She didn't answer, her face buried in her hands. He could take a guess.
"I think I'm pregnant,” she finally spoke, her voice a whisper.
"Oh, that,” he said in a light hearted tone.
"What do you mean 'oh, that'?" she sobbed. "I don't even know what happened or who the father is!"
"Why wouldn't you just assume that it’s mine?” he asked.
"I don’t know. Hana asked me if it is yours or Lucien’s,” she said. “She mentioned him twice. Who is he?”
“He’s nobody. I think you can take him right out of the equation.”
“What am I going to do? I’m still in school and… Chevalier, I’m scared.”
“There’s not much you can do. Stay healthy and let me worry about the rest.”
She turned to him. "Chevalier, you don't have to do this. If I made a mistake and...”
She couldn't finish the sentence.
"Are you insulting me?” he shouted at her. "Don’t you think I’d know if I'm the father or not? Why would I claim a responsibility I have nothing to do with?"
She couldn't answer.
They sat there until dawn. The gentle breeze helped her think the situation through. "What happened between us?” she asked.
"I wronged you,” he confessed. "I attacked you because I was pissed that you had belittled my manhood. I shouldn't have done that.”
"Do I keep it?” she placed her hands over her lower abdomen. "I mean...could I?"
"You shouldn't have to think like that,” he drew her closer to share his warmth. "Stop worrying. Let me worry about the rest. I really believe I can make you happy, Kali. Please have faith in me.”
†††††
The demons were standing around in clumps, patiently waiting and speculating about what was to come. They communicated with each other through telepathy, as if they were afraid of being overheard. Wines of ancient vintage were being served around the room. Even with their concerns, the demons thoroughly enjoyed the libations. Only Soren dismissed the beverages.
He was deep in thought, doing a little speculating of his own. He lifted his eyes when he noticed a stir on his master’s bed. He was beside him in a few quick strides.
“You are finally conscious, my lord,” Soren said. Almost by instinct, he knelt down to one knee before his master. The others in the room sank to their knees to offer their homage, as well.
“How long have I slept?” Lucifer asked as he rose from his bed. He brought his hand to his temple in an a
bsurd attempt to quell the throbbing in his head. When the last of his memories sluggishly returned, his blue eyes darkened with rage.
“It has been three new moons,” Soren informed him.
“Where is that woman?” Lucifer demanded, unconsciously placing his other hand over his heart.
Chapter 15: His Wrath
“There they are,” Soren pointed to the couple walking arm-in-arm down the sidewalk. “She looks as beautiful as ever. They say that a woman is most beautiful when she’s in love.”
Soren could see anger dancing in Lucifer’s gaze. He grinned to himself, satisfied with Lucifer’s reaction.
“Why are we going shopping for the baby now?” Kali asked Chevalier. “You can’t even see my belly yet.”
“But I just can’t wait until the baby comes!” Chevalier said excitingly. He opened the door for her and led her into the baby specialty shop.
“Buying it stuffs doesn’t make it developed any faster,” Kali sighed. “And we don’t even know if it’s a boy or a girl, yet.”
“I have a feeling it’ll be a boy,” Chevalier picked up a little blue bib and placed it in their basket. Chevalier rubbed Kali’s belly and smiled. “Your mommy is so careless,” he said to the baby. “You’ll be coming soon and she hasn’t even prepared anything yet. Lucky for you, daddy’s a little more considerate.”
Kali was distracted by the other older women in the store. They were staring and whispering to each other. She felt uncomfortable. “They’re whispering about us,” she said to Chevalier.
“Ignore them,” Chevalier kissed her cheek. “They’re just jealous that their husbands aren’t even half as good-looking as me.”
She smiled and gave him a playful push. “You’re so conceited, Chevalier.”
Lucifer clenched his hands into fists to stop their trembling. “So she’s carrying his child,” he said.
A storm of thunderclouds abruptly formed over the city. "That woman! She betrayed me in the three months that I was asleep! She chose to forget me and now she's carrying his child? I’ll kill her! I’ll kill them both!”