“Cut the bullshit,” I snapped. “This is supposed to be the fun bit, you know, the beginning of a relationship when everything is pink and fluffy. Our do-over. Right?”
“Pink like your slippers?”
“This isn’t funny.”
I couldn’t see his face, but I had a feeling he was sniggering. I had to bite the side of my mouth to stop myself from laughing. He didn’t need to know he could win me over with one silly comment.
“I know,” he grumbled, nodding at my front door.
“You going to let me in?”
“Depends on how forthcoming you’re intending to be.”
Jonah pushed off the wall and came to stand in front of me. He skimmed his finger along the top of my dress, right across my breasts. I wanted to hum my approval, but clenched my teeth. I wasn’t letting him divert my attention.
“Okay, from the moment I left home I was alone. I never let anybody get too close, because I didn’t want to be hurt again. I didn’t want to hurt anyone else. Five years ago I found someone I liked. I really thought my luck had changed. But like the idiot I am, I did hurt her.”
“How?” I asked, my voice little more than a whisper.
“I was too much for her. The meds, the anxiety, and the truth; it was more than she could cope with.”
He was trying so hard to warn me off, but he was having the opposite effect. The sadness rolled off him in waves. It was becoming difficult for me to ignore. He needed me, and as much as I tried, I couldn’t make myself walk away. I gripped the bottom of his shirt and moved closer.
“I guess it would all seem a bit much for some people.”
“Why are you still here then? Why aren’t you running away screaming?”
“I have no idea,” I replied, shaking my head.
“You’re far too secretive, and rather moody. In fact, your only endearing quality is that you’re rather pretty to look at.”
The side of his mouth lifted in a cute smirk.
“Pretty, huh?”
“Yes, when you’re not pouting like a petulant child, that is.”
I wasn’t finished, but we both jumped, startled at the sound of Mrs. Kindle’s front door opening. She popped her head around the frame, her hair tucked into a net and her robe pulled right up to her neck.
“Oh, it’s you, Elle. I thought I heard a bit of a commotion. Is everything alright?”
“It’s fine. Jonah just took me to see a movie.”
Jonah shuffled next to me, placing his arm around my waist and smiling at Mrs. Kindle.
“Do you think I was born yesterday, young lady?
Since when do you walk into a theater in your slippers?”
I stammered, trying to work out a reasonable explanation. I didn’t want to tell her about the roof; it was better kept as our secret.
Jonah snickered, as he leaned down to kiss my cheek. “See you tomorrow, Red. Thanks for tonight. I had fun.”
And with that he left me to deal with my neighbor. I gaped at his back as he entered the elevator. We hadn’t finished that conversation, and he knew it.
“You have some explaining to do. I love a good gossip. It seems like you have plenty,” Mrs. Kindle smiled.
I feigned a yawn, pretending I was too exhausted to talk. Even though she was disappointed, she agreed to postpone the conversation until tomorrow.
I would have to think of another excuse.
The next morning was so busy I didn’t have a chance to talk to anyone. I was adding the finishing touches to a new website, hoping my client would like what I’d produced for him. I hadn’t even gone for my morning run. I now felt lethargic and in need of some energizing. So after sending my client a quick email, I stretched and walked over to my window.
I wondered if it was too busy to go for a run, but then when wasn’t Central Park busy? I really needed to clear my head, so I decided to change my clothes. As I walked toward the bedroom, there was a knock at the door.
I muttered a curse as I opened it, only to find Jonah leaning against the frame clad in shorts and a sleeveless T-shirt. All thoughts vacated my head, just like they always did when this man was anywhere near me.
“Busy?” He asked, smiling slightly, but never quite meeting my gaze.
He grew more confident the more time we spent together but was always cautious. He acted as though I might change my mind at any moment and tel him to leave me alone.
“Not really, though I was just about to go for a run.
Have you come to finish the conversation we started last night?”
“And that would be?” He drawled, feigning nonchalance.
I growled at him, turning my back and stalking away, leaving the door open. “You know what I’m talking about,” I spat, making a big show of folding the throw I kept on the couch.
“I came to see you. I needed a break from my work and wondered if you wanted to join me in the park?”
I spun around, glaring at him. “Have you been watching me?”
He moved toward me; his walk as slow and precise as a panther. His eyes held the same predatory gleam, sending a shiver racing down my spine. As he neared, his hand reached out, his fingers touching my jaw and tilting it up slightly. When he spoke his words were so husky that I felt them down to my very core.
“I always watch you. You consume my every thought.”
I swallowed and licked my lips. I’d hoped he would take it as an invitation, but he didn’t. Instead, he dropped his hand and took a step backward. I tried to catch my breath as he spoke to me.
“I’m going blading. I thought you’d like to come.”
“Blading? Like skates?” I questioned, grinning but shaking my head. “No way. I don’t do skates, Jonah.”
“Sure you do.”
“Nope, I don’t. I run. Anyway, what were you saying about work? What is it that you do exactly?”
“Come with me, and I’ll tell you.”
I pushed at his chest, moving around him.
“Blackmail?”
“I never said I played fair, Red,” he exhaled lightly.
“I want to spend time with you. I’ve finished for the day. I wondered if you’d like to come with me. I’m not used to this kind of thing... ”
“And what kind of thing would this be?” I pushed for more. I knew it could bite me on the ass, but he had to give me something because I wasn’t willing to let him take the lead.
He was staring at the floor, his back to me again, but I heard his words. “I just want to try. I want to see where this leads.”
That was all I needed for the moment, so I conceded. “I don’t have any skates.”
Jonah gave a low snort, before moving forward to tickle his fingers against mine. “You can rent them. Come on, it’ll be fun. Come out and play, little red.”
I griped but knew as soon as he grinned at me that I would give in. The idea of spending a few hours in the sun with him was too much to say no to.
He waited in my living room while I changed my clothes, dressing in the smallest shorts I owned. If I was going to make a fool of myself, I might as well look good doing it. I slipped on an athletic top that was tight and bared my midriff, and pulled my hair up into a high ponytail. I received a gentle whistle when I exited the bedroom, relieving some of the anxiety I had about being on skates in front of Jonah.
I still wasn’t sure that I wanted to do this, but walked out of the apartment with him anyway. His skates were on the floor next to my front door. He picked them up with one hand and he took hold of mine with the other.
“Are you going to keep to your side of the bargain?” I questioned as we rounded the block.
He squeezed my hand, leaning down to place a kiss on top of my head before tugging me across the busy road. He negotiated the bustling people with confidence, swerving and weaving, but never letting go of my hand or his blades. I followed, enjoying the show of assertiveness.
We ended up outside a sporting goods store.
When he asked
my shoe size, I bumbled before blurting out size nine. His eyes went wide, those cute little dimples appearing on his cheeks.
“Damn! You have big feet for a girl. No wonder you wear those huge slippers,” he teased.
I didn’t get a chance to respond, before he made a swift exit and walked into the store to rent my blades. I backed myself up against the wall, wanting to make sure I could see everyone as they passed me. I didn’t want to be caught unaware; not like when I was attacked. Only once Jonah returned was I able to breathe a sigh of relief.
“Are you ready to have some fun, skater girl?”
I rolled my eyes at him, staying at his side until we entered the park. I glared at him as we took a seat on a bench, and he began to undo his tennis shoes.
“I have no idea why I agreed to this,” I grumbled, shaking my head.
“Sure you do.”
“Okay then, tell me. What do you do for a living?
What pays the bills, Jonah Quinn?”
His hair flopped into his eyes, obscuring them from view. Before he answered, he knelt down on the floor before me. I gulped, my heart skipping a beat in excitement. He lifted my right foot, holding my ankle as he slipped off my shoe.
“I’m an artist. I draw.”
I touched his hair, stroking it across his forehead.
“Does that pay the rent?”
Jonah nodded, making sure the skate was fastened on my foot before moving to the next. “I do all right from it. Now, stand up.”
“I don’t think... ”
“That’s right, don’t think. Just stand up and concentrate on your balance. I’m here to stop you from falling.”
“What if I’ve already fallen?” I whispered, realizing I’d spoken the words out loud.
Jonah frowned but didn’t comment. He held out his hand and waited for me. I wobbled, eventually standing, but clung to Jonah as if his was a lifeline. Children were giggling as they rode by on their bikes. Dogs yapped at each other while babies gurgled away in their strollers. I refused to fall on my ass in front of all of these people. I had to stay upright.
I let go of him, shaking, but managed to stand.
Jonah clapped and kissed my nose, then skated in circles around me.
“Don’t do that!” I shouted. “You’re making me dizzy!”
He stopped but was too far for me to reach out and grab him. He crooked a finger at me, beckoning me forward. “Come on,” he encouraged. “You can do it, Red.
Just one small push and you’ll be able to touch me.”
“Is this where I trust you again?”
“No. You trust yourself. Trust your own instincts, because I doubt they’re wrong. Sometimes it just takes longer than usual to show that you were right.”
I caught the double meaning to his words. I let them sink it before I replied. “I hope you’re right. I’d really hate to get hurt, Jonah.”
“Take the leap,” he stated so quietly I could barely hear him over the passersby.
I inhaled sharply, and pushed on the blades, my eyes firmly closed. When I opened them I was in Jonah’s arms. He grinned down at me, happiness lighting up his face.
“You did it!”
“I did,” I sobered. “You could too, you know. You just need to trust and take that leap.”
“I think I will... thanks to you.”
His mouth lowered to mine as his arms tightened around me. I relaxed into his arms, praying he meant it.
We spent three hours skating, and by the time we were finished, I was actually pretty good at it. I was exhausted, and though Jonah seemed like he would be able to skate for another hour, I made him sit down on the grass with me. I took the chunky skates off, discarding them near a tree and was still as I tried to catch my breath. I hadn’t laughed so much in a long time. It was exhilarating.
Jonah took his own skates off, then handed me a bottle of water from his backpack and lay flat on his back across the grass. I watched his chest rise and fall, seeing the sinew ripple underneath the cotton T-shirt. I shuffled closer to him, placing the bottle on the grass and rested my hand on his chest, as I fitted against his side. He reached around me, touching the grazed skin on my knee.
“How’s the boo-boo?” He asked, as I tried to focus on anything but the way my skin tingled from his touch.
“Smarts a bit. It’s nothing serious. I think one scrape in three hours, isn’t too bad.”
He nodded, closing his eyes and tilting his head up toward the sun. The lines that appeared between his brows when he was concentrating faded, and he relaxed.
My hand reached up of its own volition, touching the damp hair that had fallen across his forehead.
“You did great. I knew you would. Better than a run?”
Jonah opened his eyes, fixing his brilliant-blue gaze on me. Stunning. I felt my chest and face flush as he continued to look at me. I found it startling to think no one had gotten to know the real Jonah; the one that needed a friend.
“Don’t know about that,” I grinned, leaning into him. “I don’t fall on my ass when I run.”
He chuckled. Our eyes met again, and I wanted nothing more than to kiss him. Jonah licked his lips as though he could read my mind. I leaned away from him, hoping that he would be more responsive in an open setting.
“Why did you leave home so young?”
He blinked, shock registering before he spoke,
“Wow, straight to the point, huh, Red?”
“Yup.”
I continued combing my fingers through his hair, teasing the dark strands with my fingers. I started to think he wasn’t going to answer when he exhaled.
“I was a bad kid. A real bad kid. I didn’t give a shit about anyone, certainly not my family. I made a mess of everything. There was just no way back. I had to leave.”
“Police?” I asked, wanting to gauge just how bad he’d been.”
He nodded. “Speaking of police, have they been back in contact with you?”
“No, they haven’t, but stop changing the subject.
How bad?”
His hand tightened on my hip as he breathed,
“Very.”
“Is that why you’ve changed your name?”
He nodded again.
“Excuse my excessive drama. You’re not a fugitive or anything, are you?”
He chuckled and shook his head in denial as his hand stroked my thigh.
“I don’t understand. All of that was ten years ago, you’ve changed, right? You’re an adult now. Don’t your parents see that?”
The lines between his brows returned, and he tried to look away. The hurt resonated from his eyes, and I wondered if I would ever understand him. Would he let me?
“I call my parents once a year, Elle. That’s as far as our interactions go.”
“How?” I gasped. “Why?”
He gave a small shake of his head, closing his eyes to block me out. I didn’t need to look at him to know he was upset; the hurt was evident in his tone. I fought the urge to wrap him in my arms without much success, and before I knew it, I was straddling his hips and leaning over him with my arms around his neck.
“Is that why you need all the medications, have the anxiety attacks? You suffer because they don’t... want you?”
“You shouldn’t feel sorry for me,” he whispered against my neck, taking the comfort I was offered. “It was a long time ago. I deserve every bit of the distance that’s between me and my family.”
“I don’t believe you, Jonah. I don’t believe anyone deserves to be ostracized from their parents at seventeen.”
He turned his head so that he could look up at me.
His lips spread into a small smile as he lifted his hands and framed my face. “I’m not sure I deserve you as a friend.”
“I think you do,” I grinned, wanting to kiss him; desperate to make him happy. “Maybe in time you’l believe it.”
“Maybe.”
Jonah adjusted his hips, the friction reminding me of just h
ow close we were. His thin shorts disguised very little, and my cheeks flamed in response. I shifted, intending to climb off him when his hands locked on my hips.
“I thought I was too heavy for you... ” I started, trailing off when he shook his head.
“Stay where you are. I like it.”
I stared at him, searching his expression. “Jonah, where are we going with this?” I asked, my voice softening.
As he broke eye contact, I was certain he would shut me out. However, he exhaled, smoothing his hands up my back until he held my face and spoke just as gently as I had, “I don’t know, Red. But I’ll be honest and say that I’m liking it.”
I sighed, then nodded and turned my face into his palm. I kissed the center of it, reveling in the texture of his skin against my lips. It was moments like this that I could forget the secrets he kept from me and just enjoy our time together. Here and now, we were like any other couple; we were learning and enjoying each other.
“I am too. Maybe more of this,” I breathed, gesturing between us, “and less of the skating.”
His skimmed his thumb across my lower lip, dipping the tip into my mouth a little and smirking.
“More of this?” He crooned as he brought my face down and nuzzled my jaw. “This? Or this?”
His lips ghosted across mine before fully connecting with them. It was a gentle, delicate kiss, but one that left me gasping and wanting more. Jonah’s tongue entered my mouth with caution, sliding against mine before retreating. His hands smoothed down my back, stalling on my ass and cupping it as he tugged me closer. I relented, allowing my body to sag against him. Jonah hummed as my breasts connected with his chest. I was aware of tittering from passing teenagers when he gave my ass a squeeze. I didn’t care. Whenever his lips teased mine the world around us disappeared, as did my will power.
In the midst of our kiss, Jonah’s shorts vibrated. I had become so lost in the moment that I failed to realize I was gyrating against it. Jonah pulled it out of his pocket, blushing and clearing his throat as I looked at him in confusion.
“Um... it’s my cell... ” he croaked.
“Oh, my God!” I exclaimed, rolling off him onto the grass.
I stared up at the sky and attempted to regulate my breathing. As he spoke into the receiver, I made every effort to calm down. How could a simple kiss make me forget myself every, single time? I couldn’t remember one time Nathan left me as weak-kneed as Jonah did. He was toxic, addictive.