“My turn,” Reagan cries. She takes her from Sky like she’s a football and holds her up so Pete can help her support Kit’s head. Kit’s eyes are wide open and she stares into Reagan’s face, and Kit grabs hold of Pete’s finger and holds on tight.
“She’s got one hell of a grip,” Pete declares.
“Let me have a turn,” Sam says, and he takes her next.
“All these blond men,” Emily’s mom says. “She’s not going to know who’s who.”
Kit’s eyes wander over to Logan, almost like she’s looking for him, and he smiles, his arm still around Emily as he sits beside her in the hospital bed. Emily looks tired, but she knows none of these boys are going to leave without holding that little girl at least once.
Matt goes to Emily and kisses her cheek, whispers into her ear, and then ushers his family out of the room. The little girls get one last look at the baby, and then the room empties out just a little.
Pete and Reagan leave next. “Get some rest,” Pete tells Emily, squeezing the top of her head. He makes a loud slurping sound against Logan’s cheek, and Logan swats him away. Sam passes the baby to Paul and goes out with Pete and Reagan.
“Thing one and thing two,” Emily’s dad says.
Paul chuckles. “At least they’re staying out of trouble.”
A lady comes in and introduces herself as a lactation consultant. Paul puts Kit in my arms before I can stop him and wraps his arms around us both. I close my eyes and let the safe sensation wash over me. When I open them, Emily is casting me a curious glance.
“We should all go,” I say.
Emily’s parents look at one another and nod. They’re leaving, too. I was worried we’d have to run them out so Emily could learn to breastfeed her baby in private. I would totally do that for her.
“We’ll be back later,” Emily’s dad says. Emily just lays her head back against the inclined bed and nods.
I put the baby in Logan’s arms, and she squirms, her little mouth opening to let out a cry. Logan looks at Emily. “Is she loud?” he asks.
Emily shakes her head. “She kind of sounds like a baby bird,” she says.
Logan stares down at his daughter as though she’s a thing of wonderment. And she is. She really is.
“Congratulations,” Paul says to them both.
Emily winces when Kit’s sounds become more like a siren. “Okay, now she’s loud,” she says with a laugh. Logan passes Kit to Emily, and she looks up at the lactation consultant like she’s not sure what to do.
Paul ushers Em’s parents out the door, and we follow.
He heaves a sigh and looks down at his watch. “Don’t we have a doctor’s appointment today?” he asks.
I stop and think. “Oh shit,” I say. The sun is up, and it’s Monday. And I have an appointment at ten in the morning.
I reach for my purse to pull my phone out, but I realize I left it in the hospital room.
“I’ll be right back,” I say, and I sprint back up to Emily’s room. I knock softly and wait for someone to call out that I can come in. Emily has the baby in her arms and her shoulder is bare. Logan tosses a lightweight blanket over her really quickly.
“It’s just me,” I say. “Sorry, but I forgot my purse.”
I dash over and grab it. But at the door, I have to stop and take one last look. Emily is sitting up in bed staring down at their daughter. Logan has his arm wrapped around them both, and he’s holding them close, talking softly to Emily. She turns and kisses his cheek. He smiles at her, and there’s so much love there that it makes me ache inside.
They’re all wrapped up in one another, so I leave the room much more quietly than I arrived.
But outside the door I stop and think about the way they looked together. Their family is perfect. Is it safe for me to want that, too? Or is perfect something I’ll just never have?
Paul looks so damn handsome leaning against the pole outside the hospital that I have to stop and stare at him. He laughs down at his phone. God, that man makes my heart go pitter-patter when he smiles. And when he frowns. And when he does nothing. But mostly, when he smiles, he takes my breath away.
“What’s funny?” I ask as I walk up to him.
He holds up his phone and shows me the picture of Emily and Kit that Logan must have just taken. First full tummy, it says under it.
“Next he’ll send one that says first full diaper,” Paul says with a chuckle. He hops up onto the curb and walks down it like it’s a tightrope, his arms outstretched. He can be so serious and still such a kid at the same time. I guess he should still be young at heart. He’s only in his mid to late twenties, although he’s been carrying the burden of his entire family his whole adult life. I like this side of him.
I shove him off the curb, and he jumps to the ground. He takes my hand.
“You always this happy in the morning?” I ask.
He points to his chest. “Who, me?” he asks. “I am Mr. Sunshine all the time.”
I laugh out loud. “Tell that to someone who doesn’t know you.”
He looks down at his phone and then throws his head back and laughs. “See,” he says. “Told you.”
I see the picture of Kit’s first diaper change and roll my eyes. “I think it’s sweet,” I say quietly.
He sobers a little and looks closely at me. Too closely for comfort, so I cross my arms and speed toward the subway.
“You know you’re pregnant, right?” he asks my back.
I stop. “I won’t know until later,” I say. I turn to face him.
He brushes my hair back from my forehead. “You’ve woken up sick the past two days,” he says. “You’re pregnant.”
“I won’t know until later,” I say again, and I start for the subway again.
“And if you are?” he calls after me.
I shrug. “Then I am.”
“And?” he shouts.
“And what?” I turn around and glare at him.
“And how do you feel about that?” he asks.
I shrug again. “Fine. It’s not like I didn’t plan for it.” I make my eyes go wide and stare at him.
He holds up his hands like he’s surrendering. “Just checking,” he says.
“It’s not like it’s mine,” I remind him.
“So that means what?”
“It means it’s not mine,” I say again. “This baby is going to have two wonderful daddies, and just because it’s growing inside me does not make it mine.” Hell, even the one that does share my DNA isn’t mine. I close my eyes.
“I think you’ll like being pregnant this time,” he says. He takes my hand and pulls me into the subway. He wraps his arms around me like before and talks close to my ear. It’s all intimate, even though there’s a crowd of people around us. “After this one,” he whispers, “do you think you might like your own?”
“No.” I don’t even need to think about it.
His brow furrows. “Why not?”
“I’m not mother material.”
“Fuck that,” he says.
“Fuck you,” I say back.
He grins. “I wish you would,” he whispers, and then he kisses me quickly.
I shove his shoulder. “Shut up.”
He lifts my arms and wraps them around his neck, and then he kisses me. He kisses me in the middle of a crowded subway car with people all around us—again—but I feel like we’re the only two people in the world.
His phone dings, and he pulls it out of his pocket. He grins and shows me the picture. “First spit up,” he says.
Paul
I know it sounds crazy, and this is totally the wrong time to have thoughts like I’m having, but I want to be an ultrasound wand. I try to look at Friday’s face as the technician rolls a sheath over the long wand and then puts lube all over it, but it’s damn hard not to watch the movements because that stick is about to get all intimate with Friday.
We went home really quickly so she could shower, and we were almost late getting to the doct
or’s office. Cody and Garrett were pacing the sidewalk as we walked up.
Now they’re waiting in the next room while the ultrasound people get Friday ready. The pregnancy test was positive, just like I knew it would be. They’re going to do a quick check for a heartbeat, just in case there is one to be seen. They might not be able to find it yet. We’ll have to wait and see.
“I’m up here,” Friday says as I watch the wand. She laughs. But her hand shakes when I take it in mine.
“I’m jealous of that wand,” I whisper in her ear.
She shivers, but I can’t tell if it’s a sexy shiver or if she’s so fucking nervous that her skin is jostling.
The technician warns us that she’s about to insert the wand.
“Close your eyes or something, Paul,” Friday says, her cheeks growing rosy.
I turn so that my back is to her lower half, and I look at the wall for a minute.
“All set,” the technician says. “Should I let the dads in?” She looks at Friday and then at me with a curious expression.
“You could just get a picture for them,” I suggest. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I don’t want to share this moment with anyone. Then I remind myself that this baby isn’t mine. Friday isn’t even mine. Yet.
Friday nods her head. “They’re the dads,” she says. “They deserve to enjoy every moment.”
Her lower half is draped with a sheet, and if you didn’t see the wand before it went in, you’d have no idea she has something up her vagina that can take pictures.
Cody and Garrett walk in holding hands, and Friday smiles at them. She’s still shivering, though, and her teeth start to chatter. I bend over her face and look into her eyes, then drag my finger down her nose over and over until her eyes close. Her dark lashes flutter against her cheek, and then she opens her green eyes and looks into mine.
“Thank you,” she whispers. She takes a deep breath.
I kiss her cheek and scoot closer to her, and Cody and Garrett step up beside me. Cody takes her free hand, and they look toward the monitor.
The technician maneuvers the wand and a picture appears on the screen. She squints, and her brow furrows. But then she stops and smiles. “Right there,” she says. She points at the monitor. “That little, tiny flutter. Do you see it?” She looks at the dads and I doubt they can even see at all because they’re both blinking back tears. She hands them tissues, and they wipe their eyes really quickly. Cody blows his nose. It sounds so much like a foghorn that Friday laughs. The picture on the screen moves, and the flutter stops.
“What happened?” Cody asks. “Is it all right?”
“Just needs a little adjustment,” the technician says. The flutter reappears. You can barely see it. It’s kind of like the beat of a hummingbird’s wings, and it moves so fast that you might miss the action altogether if you blink.
The door opens, and the doctor slips into the room. “Congratulations,” she says to Cody and Garrett. She barely spares Friday a glance.
I want to poke her and say, Notice the vessel, bitch, but I refrain. I squeeze Friday’s hand, instead.
She mouths, It’s all right, at me. I lean down and kiss her, because I just need to.
I don’t know at what point I started needing her. Probably the moment I found out she wasn’t a lesbian and I had a chance with her. But now I know it. I do need her. That scares me a little bit, and I am not sure she’s ready for what I want.
The doctor sits down on a rolling chair and looks at the screen, takes some measurements, and then scoots back. She pulls the wand from inside Friday and pulls off the sheath. She presses some tissues into Friday’s hands and then helps her up. I reach around behind her and pull the pillow closer to her butt because she’s naked from the waist down and not wearing a robe. She has a sheet over her lap, but still.
Friday rolls her eyes at me. “They’re gay,” she whispers dramatically.
“I still don’t want them looking at your ass,” I whisper back.
“I could be completely naked and they wouldn’t care.”
“I would care,” I grunt out.
“Why?” she asks. Her brow furrows.
“Because,” I murmur.
“Because why?” she asks.
I lean close to her ear. “Because it’s mine,” I say so that only she can hear me. “That okay with you?”
“Yes,” she says. “I’m officially pregnant, though,” she reminds me. Like I need reminding.
I look at her. “I can wait.”
An electrical current passes between us, and my skin does that little sizzle that only she provokes until Cody puts an arm around my shoulders and I have to jerk my eyes from her to look up at him.
“We’re having a baby!” he says. He squeezes me really quickly, and I thwack him on the back.
“Congratulations,” I say.
They’re so damn happy they can barely speak.
“I wonder if they make those candy announcement things that they sell at the baby store for dads? Like the funny cigars and stuff.” Friday asks. “Yours would have to say We knocked up a chick or something really clever.”
Cody puts his hands on his hips and fake glares at her. “Anyone who knows us at all would know we would never knock up a chick.”
“But you did,” Friday reminds them. She giggles, and I can’t bite back my grin.
The guys look at one another. “Yeah, we did,” Cody says, and Garrett kisses him really quickly. Cody looks sheepishly at me. “Sorry,” he says. “Didn’t ask you if you are okay with the PDA.”
I look at Friday, and I must have a question in my eyes.
“He’s fine with it,” she says.
Friday looks toward her clothes and up at Cody and Garrett. They’re not taking the hint. I get up and motion them closer to the door. “Let’s give her a minute to get dressed, shall we?” I say.
They nod and step outside. They’re jabbering at one another and talking about baby names. I smile and close the door behind them.
“And you, too,” Friday sings out. She makes a shooing motion at me.
I shake my head. “I’m staying.”
“Fine,” she says. She stands up and carefully wraps the sheet that was draping her lower half around her waist so that she’s all covered.
“Do you need some help?” I ask. My dick twitches in my pants. I can’t help it. Her ass is naked under that sheet.
“You want to help me wipe off the goo they just stuck in my vagina?” she tosses back at me.
I let my eyes roam up and down her body until she flushes. “I’ll do anything you need if it gets me closer to your vagina.”
She lets out a heavy breath. “Paul,” she warns. She shakes a quivery finger at me. “Behave.”
“Do you still have the piercing?” I ask. No idea what made me think of that.
“Which one?” she asks as she steps behind the curtain. I can hear her shuffling around.
“How many do you have?” I immediately want to go do a quick inventory of all her intimate areas to see how they’re adorned.
“Nipples, hood, labia, navel, ears, lip, and tongue,” she says.
I sink down onto the edge of the exam table. Damn. “That’s all?”
She laughs, too. “I couldn’t think of anything else to pierce.”
I sit quietly, imagining all the metal in all her most sensitive spots. I want to suck on it, twirl it around, and play with it, preferably with my tongue. “You’re going to have to take out the lower ones before the baby gets here,” I remind her.
“You don’t know that.” She shoves the curtain back and pulls her hair from the neck of her T-shirt. I still can’t get used to this Friday. She looks so normal. Her hair is hanging loose around her shoulders, and she’s not wearing makeup still. I like it. I like her. To me, she’s just as sexy, if not more so, when she’s dressed like this as she is when she’s working at the shop all glammed up.
“Hello,” I say. “I’m a professional body piercer.”
/> “So am I,” she reminds me. “And I haven’t ever been told that.”
“Ask the doctor,” I taunt.
“I will the next time I see her.” She sticks her tongue out at me, so I reach out and grab her by her belt loops and then pull her against me. She falls into me, her hands grabbing my forearms to help her keep her balance. I lift the edge of her T-shirt and lay my palms on her warm skin.
“You always this grabby?” she asks, her mouth so close to my chest that I can feel her hot breath against my skin.
“I’m usually more grabby,” I say. “I’m trying not to scare you.”
She sucks in a quick breath. “I don’t scare easily.”
“That’s one of the many reasons I want you.”
She trembles in my arms, and I fucking love it.
“Did you get all that goop off? Or should I help you with it?” I playfully reach for her zipper, and she swats my hand away.
“That’s kind of gross,” she says over a laugh.
True. When I finally get to feel her wetness, I’d rather it be because of us rather than an ultrasound wand. But I can’t get that wand and where it was off my mind. Yes, I have a dick. Yes, I like to use it. Yes, I’d like to use it on her.
Friday glances down between us. “Umm,” she says. She points with her index finger toward my crotch. “I think you’re getting a little too excited over some goo and a vagina.”
The door opens, and Garrett sticks his head into the room. “Are you guys dressed?” he asks, squeezing his eyes shut tightly.
“No,” I say. But at the same time, Friday says, “Yes.” She slaps my chest and steps back from me. I adjust the fit of my pants.
“We already checked you out,” Cody says.
Garrett waggles his brows at me. “And you too, big guy,” he says, like he’s a vaudeville actor.
“Quit checking out my man,” Friday says, and my heart swells in my chest.
I grab Friday’s arm on the way out the door. “What did he mean about me being okay with PDA earlier?” I whisper to her. I don’t know why I have that on my mind, but it stuck with me.