A Factless Autobiography
1 [4/38–9, typed] Dated 29 March 1930. Marked beginning passage. Vigny: Alfred de Vigny (1797–1863), French author of poems, essays, plays and a novel. Disillusioned in love, unsuccessful in politics, and unenthusiastically received by the French Academy, he withdrew from society and became increasingly pessimistic in his writings, which recommended stoical resignation as the only noble response to the suffering life condemns us to.
2 [5/29, ms.] Marked B. of D. (Preface?).
3 [1/88, mixed] The first three paragraphs were published in Solução Editora, no. 2, 1929. The last two paragraphs were handwritten on the original typescript.
Cesário Verde (1855–86) may be considered the father of modern Portuguese poetry. The vivid images and exuberance of his verses, often set in the streets of downtown Lisbon, find echoes in the poetry of Pessoa’s heteronym Álvaro de Campos.
4 [1/59, ms.]
5 [2/7, typed] Published in Solução Editora, no. 4, 1929.
6 [1/79, ms.]
7 [2/12–13, typed]
8 [1/73, typed]
9 [2/4, typed]
fourth-floor room: The original reads ‘second-floor’, presumably a slip, since all other references situate Soares’s rented room on the fourth floor.
10 [1/58, typed]
11 [9/34, ms.]
12 [3/17, typed]
13 [2/90, ms.]
14 [1/22, typed]
15 †[28/21, ms.] Marked Preface, but with no explicit indication that it pertains to The Book of Disquiet.
16 [2/53, typed]
Cascais and Estoril: Beach towns south-west of Lisbon. Cais do Sodré: One of Lisbon’s wharfs and the site of the railway station that serves the Cascais line.
17 †[9/52, ms.]
18 [2/39–41, ms.]
delivery boy: In Pessoa’s time these were a regular presence on many downtown Lisbon street corners. Self-employed, they would deliver or fetch objects large and small as well as run errands.
19 [1/76, typed] Dated 22 March 1929.
Moorish ladies of folklore: Since the Moorish occupation of Iberia, legends of enchanted Moorish ladies have abounded in Portuguese and Spanish folklore. The typical lady is a ravishing beauty, good-hearted, often a princess, and an inhabitant of nature, sometimes haunting a cave or a well.
20 †[28/7, typed] Marked Preface, but with no explicit indication that it pertains to The Book of Disquiet.
21 †[15B3/86] Dated 24 March 1929.
22 †[94/75, ms.]
23 [7/44, ms.]
24 [1/64, ms.]
25 [1/15, typed]
26 [4/44, ms.]
27 [2/70, typed]
28 [2/66, ms.]
29 [3/18, typed] Dated 25 December 1929.
30 [4/29, ms.]
Vieira: Father António Vieira (1608–97), a Jesuit who spent much of his life in Brazil, is one of the great Portuguese prose stylists. His enormous output includes about 200 sermons and over 500 letters.
31 [3/21, typed]
32 [3/6, ms.] The manuscript evidence indicates that this passage was written during The Book’s last phase. The section titled ‘A Disquiet Anthology’ contains a ‘Symphony of the Restless Night’, written during the first phase. tomb of God: ‘tomb of the world’/‘tomb of everything’ (alternate versions)
33 [3/22, typed]
34 [2/67–8, ms.]
35 [7/4, ms.]
36 [3/26, typed] Dated 5 February 1930.
Vieira: See note for Text 30.
Sousa: Frei Luís de Sousa (1555–1632), a Portuguese Dominican whose biographies of religious figures are admired for the limpid elegance of their prose. dignity of my soul: ‘divinity of my soul’/‘detachment of my soul’ (alternate versions)
37 [9/24, ms.]
38 [5/79, ms.]
39 [2/74, mixed] Dated 21 February 1930.
40 [3/67, typed]
41 [3/15, typed] Dated 14 March 1930.
42 [1/81–2, mixed]
on the surface of never changing: ‘on its surface, which is all it consists of’ (alternate version)
43 [3/13, ms.] Dated 23 March 1930.
44 [1/77, typed]
45 [9/9, typed]
46 [4/34, typed] Dated 24 March 1930.
Caeiro: Alberto Caeiro, one of Pessoa’s poetic heteronyms, supposedly lived in the country. The cited verses are from the seventh poem of The Keeper of Sheep.
47 [1/24, typed]
48 [1/32, ms.]
49 [1/34, typed]
50 [2/45, mixed]
Graça or São Pedro de Alcântara: Two look-out points on either side of downtown Lisbon.
51 [4/42, typed] Dated 4 April 1930.
52 [1/72, ms.]
53 [7/16, ms.] Marked B. of D. (preface).
54 [2/9–10, mixed]
55 [3/64, typed] Dated 5 April 1930.
Vieira’s prose: See note for Text 30.
56 [3/66, typed] Dated 5 April 1930.
a sphinx from the stationer’s: This might refer to a paperweight in the form of a miniature sphinx.
57 [3/62, ms.] Dated 5 April 1930.
58 [3/59–61, ms.] Dated 6 April 1930.
59 [1/65, mixed]
60 [144D2/45, ms.]
61 [9/25, ms.]
62 [3/57, mixed] Dated 10 April 1930.
63 [3/54–5, ms.] Dated 10 April 1930.
64 †[23/28, ms.]
65†[94/13, ms.]
66 [1/57, typed]
67 [3/56, typed] Dated 12 April 1930.
68 [1/88, ms.]
69 [5/2, ms.]
70 [1/30, typed]
71 [3/58, ms.] Dated 13 April 1930.
Vieira: See note for Text 30.
72 [1/53, typed] Published in Revolução, 6June 1932.
Amiel: Henri-Frédéric Amiel (1821–81), a Swiss professor of aesthetics and philosophy, gained posthumous fame for his Fragments d’un journal intime, which in certain respects resembles The Book of Disquiet.
São Pedro de Alcântara: See note for Text 50.
Poço do Bispo: A dock area in north-east Lisbon.
73 [3/51–3, ms.] Dated 14 April 1930.
74 [3/30–31, ms.]
75 [7/12, ms.]
76 †[8/11–12, typed]
77 [5/67, ms.]
78 [3/46, typed] Dated 21 April 1930.
79 [3/47, typed] Dated 21 April 1930.
80 [9/36, 36a, ms.]
81 [2/63, ms.]
82 [3/45, ms.] Dated 23 April 1930.
83 [3/40–41, typed] Dated 25 April 1930.
Vieira: See note for Text 30.
Frei Luís de Sousa: See note for Text 36. The biography alluded to, published in 1619, tells the life of Frei Bartolomeu dos Mártires, a Portuguese archbishop.
offspring of the stiff furniture: ‘offspring of dead things’ (alternate version)
84 [3/42, typed] 25 April 1930.
Sigismund, King of Rome: The Holy Roman Emperor from 1411 to 1437.
The title is royal, and the reason for it is imperial: ‘The title isn’t bad, and it belongs to the man who can “is himself”’ (alternate version)
85 [2/3, typed]
86 [2/3, ms.]
the Romanization of Hellenism through Judaism: ‘the Judaization of Hellenism through Rome’ (alternate version)
our age – senile and carcinogenic: ‘our age – an illiterate’s bibliophilia’ (alternate version)
gave rise to all the negations we use to affirm ourselves: ‘gave rise to the era that brought their fall’ (alternate version)
with sociologies such as these?: ‘with all these civilizations?’ (alternate version)
87 [3/39, ms.] Dated 6 May 1930.
thereby shoving it up against the wall: ‘thereby letting it flow like a river, the slave of its own bed’ (alternate version)
88 [5/60, ms.]
89 †[133F/95, ms.]
90 [3/34, typed] Dated 14 May 1930.
91 [3/35, typed] Dated 15 May 1930.
r /> 92 [5/42–4, ms.] The text carries the following heading, in English: (our childhood’s playing with cotton reels, etc.)
my inner life: ‘my inner stage setting’ (alternate version)
window on to the street of my dreams: ‘window that looks inside me’ (alternate version)
93 [5/19, ms.]
94 [3/33, ms.] Dated 18 May 1930.
95 [2/78, typed] Dated 18 May 1930. Published in Presença, June–July 1930.
96 [3/16, typed]
97 [4/84, ms.]
98 [1/56, typed]
99 [3/32, typed] Dated 12 June 1930.
100 [3/29, ms.] Dated 13 June 1930.
101 [5/1, ms.]
102 [3/27, typed] Dated 27 June 1930.
103 [144X/29, ms.]
104 †[133F/79, typed]
105 †[20/50, typed]
106 [1/89, typed] Cesário Verde: See note for Text 3.
107 [7/14, ms.]
Terreiro do Paço: ‘Palace Square’, so called because of the royal palace that stood there from the sixteenth to the eighteenth centuries. When the palace was destroyed by the 1755 earthquake, the large and elegantly redesigned square was renamed Praça do Comércio.
108 [2/80, typed] Dated 16 July 1930.
the poet: José de Espronceda (1808–42). The two verses, taken from a long narrative poem titled El Estudiante de Salamanca, were cited by Pessoa in the original: languidez, mareo / y angustioso afá n. Pessoa left an incomplete English translation of the work, which he titled The Student of Salamanca and credited to heteronym Charles James Search, brother of Alexander.
109 [2/16, typed] The parenthetical heading is in English in the original.
110 [2/29, typed] Dated 20 July 1930.
111 [5/49, typed]
112 [2/83, ms.] Dated 25 July 1930.
113 [5/78, ms.]
114 [4/85, ms.]
115 [4/82, ms.]
116 [7/30, typed]
117 [2/82, typed] Dated 27 July 1930.
118 [3/2, ms.]
119 [5/46, ms.]
Amiel’s diary: See the note for Text 72.
Scherer: Edmond Scherer (1815–89), a well-known French literary critic, was a friend of Amiel’s and wrote the Preface to his posthumously published Fragments d’un journal intime. Pessoa’s memory of the passage alluded to was inaccurate. The journal records that Scherer, in a conversation, spoke of ‘l’intelligence de la conscience’; it was Amiel himself who spoke of ‘la conscience de la conscience’.
120 [4/67, typed]
121 [1/16 a, ms.]
122 [2/50, ms.]
I live, all of it equally condemned to change: ‘I live which, because it moves, is passing’ (alternate version) cross the river… from the Terreiro do Paço to Cacilhas: Ferries still make frequent crossings from several points in Lisbon to the former fishing village of Cacilhas, from where many buses proceed to surrounding towns. See note for Text 107.
123 [4/40, typed]
Santa Justa Lift: Built in 1902, it connects the lower and upper parts of Lisbon’s centre.
124 [7/20, typed] The parenthetical heading is in English in the original.
The argonauts said: Pessoa often used the word ‘argonauts’ to mean ancient navigators in general (cf. Text 125 and ‘Symphony of the Restless Night’), and the phrase he cites was in fact not the motto of the Argonauts led by Jason. It was uttered, according to Plutarch, by Pompey the Great when, in spite of a heavy storm, he ordered his ships to set sail for Rome with the grain they had loaded in Sicily, Sardinia and North Africa.
125 †[28/12, ms.]
argonauts: See note for Text 124.
126 [2/84, typed] Dated 10 December 1930.
127 †[8/9, ms.]
128 [3/49, ms.]
129 [3/14, ms.]
130 [3/44, typed]
Cesário Verde: See the note for Text 3.
131 [3/12, ms.]
Vieira: See note for Text 30.
like the Fate of us all: ‘like this note I’ve been writing’ (alternate version)
132 [5/30, typed]
133 [2/58–9, mixed]
134 [5/41, ms.]
135 [2/21, ms.]
136 [3/48, ms.]
137 [4/21, typed]
138 [4/37, typed]
Benfica: Once an outlying suburb and now a fully integrated neighbourhood of Lisbon.
‘Any road,’ said Carlyle: In Thomas Carlyle’s Sartor Resartus: The Life and Opinions of Herr Teufelsdröckh.
Condillac begins his celebrated book: Etienne de Condillac (1715–80) begins his Essai sur l’origine des connaissances humaines (1746) not by saying that we never escape our sensations but that we never escape our own selves (which is also what Pessoa says in his next sentence, after the inaccurate citation). Further on in the Essai, however, Condillac affirms that everything we know depends on our sensations. Pessoa seems to have crunched several ideas into one, without after all being unfaithful to the French philosopher’s thought.
139 [2/87, typed] Dated 8 January 1931.
140 [2/1, mixed]
141 [7/31, ms.]
142 [1/17, typed]
143 [1/33, typed]
144 [3/7, ms.] Dated 1 February 1931. The manuscript ends with the following paragraph, crossed out by the author: What do I know? What do I seek? What do I feel? What would I ask for if I had to ask?
145 [4/12, typed] Dated 2 February 1931.
146 [3/1, ms.]
147 [1/70, typed]
148 [9/17, ms.]
149 [3/87–8, typed] Dated 3 March 1931. Published in Presença, November 1931–February 1932.
Haeckel: Ernst Heinrich Haeckel (1834–1919), a German biologist and philosopher. Pessoa had four books by Haeckel in his personal library (in French translations), including Riddle of the Universe (1899), which propounds a materialist view of the world.
Loures: Located about ten miles north-west of Lisbon.
Sanches: Francisco Sanches (1551–1623) was a Portuguese doctor and philosopher who spent most of his life in France. His most important work, Quod nihil scitur (1581), systematically employs doubt to argue that nothing can be known with certainty.
150 [1/67, typed]
151 [6/14, typed]
152 [1/14, typed]
153 [6/9, typed]
154 [2/65, ms.]
155 [4/30, typed] Dated 10 March 1931.
156 [7/15, ms.]
157 [5/52, typed]
158 [4/20, ms.]
159 [5/50, typed]
160 [2/33, typed] Dated 8 April 1931.
to be beyond repair: ‘to lack the soul to be’ (alternate version)
161 [2/46, typed]
162 [2/24, ms.]
Horace said: In the third ode of his third book of odes.
163 [2/38, ms.]
164 [7/28–28a, ms.]
165 [1/12, typed]
166 [2/54, typed] Dated 18 June 1931.
167 [2/56, typed] Dated 20 June 1931.
168 [1/35, typed]
who timidly hate life, fear death with fascination: ‘between life which I grudgingly love and death which I fear with fascination’ (alternate version)
169 [2/64, typed]
170 [2/55, typed] Dated 30 June 1931.
171 [1/74–5, typed]
Rotunda: Refers to the Praça Marquês de Pombal, a large roundabout.
Benfica: See note for Text 138.
Sintra: Located north-west of Lisbon, this ancient town has long been famous for its agreeable climate, its setting among lush green hills, and the various palaces built by Moorish and Portuguese kings.
His reality won’t let him feel: ‘won’t let him exist’ (alternate version)
172 [4/44a, ms.]
173 [151/73, ms.]
174 [2/35, typed] Dated 2 July 1931.
175 [5/36, typed] Preceded by the heading 1st article (in English).
176 †[138A/27, ms.]
177 †[155/13, typed]
178 [2/60, mixed]
179
[7/2, ms.]
180 [1/60, typed]
181 [2/37, typed] Dated 13 July 1931.
182 [138A/5, ms.]
183 [1/50, typed]
Benfica: See note for Text 138.
the Avenida: Presumably the Avenida da Liberdade, in central Lisbon.
184 [2/36, mixed] Dated 22 August 1931.
what nostalgia for the future: ‘what regret that I’m not someone else’ (alternate version)
incipient self-unawareness: ‘incipient impatience with myself’ (alternate version)
185 [9/27, ms.]
186 †[94/100, ms.]
187 [1/83–4, mixed]
188 [1/43, typed]
189 [5/62, ms.]
190 [1/51, typed]
191 [2/20, ms.]
192 [2/28, typed]
193 [2/42, typed] Dated 2 September 1931.
194 †[94/83, ms.]
195 [5/66, ms.]
196 [2/43, typed] Dated 3 September 1931.
197 [5/76–7, ms.]
198 [1/55, typed]
199 [7/11, typed]
200 [3/23, typed]
201 [4/10, mixed] Dated 10– 11 September 1931. Notation at the top of the text: (alternate passages like these with the longer ones?).
202 [4/11, typed] Dated 14 September 1931.
203 [4/31, typed] Dated 15 September 1931.
204 [4/8, typed] Dated 15 September 1931. Published in Descobrimento.
Revista de Cultura, no. 3, 1931.
205 [4/32, typed] Dated 16 September 1931.
206 [3/50, ms.] This text seems to refer to ‘In the Forest of Estrangement’, where an alcove is mentioned.
207 [6/12, typed] At the top of the text: B. of D. (or Teive?). See the Introduction for information about the Baron of Teive, Pessoa’s aristocratic heteronym.