"What about you, Kinsley?" he asked, tilting his head toward me a few inches. "Are you going to wait for me?"
He made himself seem vulnerable asking a question like that. It was so un-Liam like; he exuded confidence and control, even the way that he held my neck felt like a dominant touch. But, he was hanging on a ledge waiting for me to answer that question and I let myself relish the moment.
"Do you think you're worth waiting for?"
What a loaded question. Liam and I were playing house. We were living in lala land where no one else existed but us.
"I think you're worth it, and that's all that matters. Hang in there with me through this craziness and then we'll be together openly. I promise."
I nodded. "Okay."
"Okay?" he asked, dipping his head toward me. His scent took over my senses. I leaned forward over the console and we met somewhere in the middle, pressing into each other until he finally looped his arms around my waist and dragged me on top of him.
"Is that your gear shift or are you just excited to see me?" It was a corny joke, but I couldn't resist.
Liam squeezed his eyes shut and laughed despite the cheesiness factor. "I am definitely excited to see you. Especially in this dress," he answered as both of our gazes fell to his hands on my thighs. I was straddling his lap, my knee was jamming into his seatbelt buckle and my other leg was sandwiched between the door, but I couldn't feel the discomfort of the space when his hands were on my legs, slowly drifting upwards.
"It's like they didn't know people would be using the front seat for hardcore make out sessions. They could have at least added a little more leg room," I smiled.
The edge of Liam's mouth tilted up in a confident smirk. "Weird. When I was purchasing a car I didn't take into account the amount of make out space afforded by the front seat. I should have asked the salesman to climb on my lap during the test drive."
He was being playful, yet the whole time his hands were moving seductively over my skin.
"I like your dress," he complimented as his hands drifted upward. A shiver ran through me and Liam noticed.
"I've had it forever. It's probably too short now, but oh well."
"I like the length," he noted as his fingers found the edge of my underwear. It felt strange to be having a conversation as my breathing quickened and Liam's eyes dilated and shifted toward a dark smoldering grey.
My cell phone rang from the passenger seat, but we both ignored it. He tilted his head toward me and gently skimmed his lips along mine. It wasn’t a kiss, it was an invitation. He wanted me to make the first move, so I pressed against him, the force of my kiss pushing his head back against the seat. He moaned just loud enough to drive me crazy. I pushed my hands under his shirt feeling hard, coiled muscles beneath my touch. I'd never been with a guy like Liam. He made Josh and Trey look like boy scouts. My hands kept drifting higher over his abs and I could feel his chest tightening in response to my touch. I loved it.
Then my cell phone rang again and I broke the kiss with a heavy sigh.
"What the hell?" I reached over and grabbed my phone. BECCA flashed across the screen and I instantly stilled.
"What's up?" I asked as soon as the call connected.
"Jeez! Answer your phone quicker, lady. Are you guys still outside? You need to move or duck or something. I just saw Tara leaving the house a second ago. She walked past my window, but I’m not sure where she went after that. Maybe she got into a car or something."
"Crap," I said, quickly scrambling off Liam's lap and sliding down in the passenger seat so that my head barely met the base of the window. "Do you think she saw me leaving?"
"I have no clue, but you need to be more careful. This isn't a game." I know she was watching out for me, but her warning made me mad.
"I'll be back in a second," I answered, and then ended the call abruptly.
"What's going on?" Liam asked with concern. His eyebrows were drawn together and his brooding expression was back.
I explained what Becca had just told me.
"I haven't seen her," he answered, quickly glancing around his car.
"Well, we were occupied. She could have already walked by. Shit," I mumbled, trying to stay calm. Becca's words kept replaying in my mind. This isn't a game. This isn't a game. She was right, so why couldn’t I bring myself to stop playing?
"It'll be okay, Kinsley. I'm sure we're overreacting. There’s no way she followed you. No one is that insane."
I nodded but stayed silent. Was this worth it? Was the anxiety worth the ten minutes that I could sneak into Liam's car and be with him? What kind of relationship is that?
But then I glanced toward him. He was facing me, his hands were clenched into fists, and everything about him was wound tight. He was absolutely breathtaking with the streetlight seeping in through the window behind him. I could just barely make out his smooth jaw, the disheveled hair, the piercing eyes. I realized in that moment that I was helpless in deciding my fate. There wasn't a single cell in my body that would let me walk away from Liam Wilder without a fight.
Even if I ended up fighting myself.
"I'd better go," I mumbled.
He nodded and I could see his jaw tick back and forth. "Are you okay? I can walk you back?" I knew the situation was killing him as much as it was killing me. What kind of guy wanted to take a girl on a date in his car and then watch her walk home by herself?
“You’d better not,” I said, shaking my head.
"I'm going to drive by in a minute to make sure you got inside okay," he stated. I knew he thought I was upset with him still.
I pushed off my seat and leaned forward to give him a goodbye kiss. It caught him off guard at first. Maybe he wasn't expecting one. My lips pressed against his and then in an instant his hands were in my hair, my hands were gripping his neck, and we were both ensuring the other didn't pull away. We poured all of our worry and angst into the kiss. His tongue demanded entrance and I tilted my head to get a better angle. He sucked my bottom lip into his mouth until I whimpered and kissed him harder.
When I pulled back my lips felt swollen and tender. We stared at each other, our desire written across our faces, but neither of us said a word.
It felt like I needed to say something, something to confess how I felt for him, but we both knew. It was apparent in everything we did.
"I want to tell you I like you, but that seems dumb, like it's not enough," I admitted before turning toward the handle of the car.
Liam reached over and touched my hand to stop me. "I know," then he paused, thinking it over, and repeated his words, "I know."
…
The rest of the weekend passed quickly. Liam had a photo shoot in New York so Emily, Becca, and I stuck close together. We went to the beach Saturday morning with a few other girls from the team. Everyone laid their towels in a row and pulled out a magazine or book. Becca was the only one brave enough to test the waters. I stood on the shoreline, dipping my feet and ankles into the icy water.
Josh texted me a few times over the weekend. I never responded to any of them because I knew that he wouldn't move on if I didn't nip it in the bud. I'd tried to be nice to him in the beginning, but the longer he tried to win me back, the more I realized I couldn't give him an inch or he'd take a mile.
Saturday night Becca got a text from Penn.
It was the holy grail of texts. We squealed over it for twenty minutes before realizing that she had to formulate a response back to him. He was taking it slow and steady, asking her about her day and how her week of practice had been. I'd explained his situation, that he’d just left a long-term relationship, and Becca seemed more than happy to take it slow.
After twenty minutes of pleasantries, he invited us to a get-together at his house the following weekend.
Cue another half hour of squeals highlighted by a few crazy somersaults from Becca that resulted in her knocking my lamp off my bedside table. Luckily, the glass didn’t break.
"I feel like I'm getting my hopes
up about him,” she said as she placed the lamp back on my nightstand.
What an understatement. She was definitely getting her hopes up, but it was too late to change that.
“You’re allowed to be excited, but I’m glad you know that things with him will have to go slow.”
She nodded. “I need to keep reminding myself that he just got out of a long-term relationship and doesn't need me complicating things.”
"He wouldn't be texting you and inviting you to his house if he thought you were complicating things. Just take it easy and we'll figure it out. He seems like a really good guy though."
"What if he just wants sex?"
"Then you have sex with him and lose your virginity to one of the hottest professional soccer players in the country," I laughed. "But no, seriously, we'll figure it out. I'll try and get more intel from Liam. On the bright side, if he just got out of a relationship that means he's capable of commitment."
"Should I Google his ex?" she asked, already leaning toward my laptop.
"No! Don’t search crap like that. It's not fair to them or us. I've wanted to Google Liam a million times, but I know how much he hates when the media makes up fake stories about his life. He'd be so pissed if I was getting my information about him through TMZ."
"Okay, okay. You have a point. I'll treat Penn like he's a normal person... for now."
“Good, Peen is a normal person.”
That earned me a pillow smack.
Later that night, just as I was about to fall asleep, Liam texted me.
Liam: Finally home from New York.
Kinsley: Welcome home! Bring me anything? ;)
Liam: I had a miniature Empire State Building but this little kid stole it in the airport lounge and I felt guilty about taking it back.
Kinsley: Are you serious?
Liam: Yeah, so some kid is walking around with your gift.
Kinsley: Haha, oh well… Are you glad to be home at least?
Liam: Yeah, it was a long trip. All work and no play.
Kinsley: I can’t relate. I lounged around on the beach all day.
Liam: Show me some proof…
I smiled down at his text, trying to decipher if he was being serious or not. Either way, I decided it wouldn’t hurt to remind him of what he was missing while he’d been away in New York. I pulled my shirt up while I laid in bed and then tugged my sleeping shorts down a bit so that he could see my tan torso and the curve of my hip bones. It was just enough to get his imagination going without showing anything too risqué. I skimmed the top of my shorts with my fingers and snapped the picture with the other hand.
I attached the photo with a message that said, “Can you see the tan line from my bathing suit bottom?”
Not two seconds later, my phone rang in my hand and his name flashed across the screen.
“It’s late, Liam,” I teased after answering the call.
“I don’t care. Are you alone?”
My room was pitch black and I couldn’t hear anything in the hallway. I glanced over toward the bathroom to see the light off, so Emily was already asleep.
“Yes, everyone is asleep.”
“I wish I was there right now.”
I hummed into the phone. “Oh really? And what would you do if you were here?” I asked, trying to play the role of the seducer.
“I’d put my hand exactly where yours was in that photo,” he began, and without thinking, I put my hand back where I had it, letting it rest on the hem of my thin sleeping shorts.
“And then?” I asked, hearing the evidence of lust in my voice.
“I’d skim my finger on top of your shorts, dipping it gently inside to feel the soft skin underneath.” My finger followed his trail. “And then I’d tug your pants and underwear down and toss them to the side.”
“You’re not wasting any time,” I murmured, fingering the top of my shorts before pushing them down my long legs.
He chuckled dark and low. “You wouldn’t mind. You’d beg me to speed up.”
“Mmm,” I hummed, stroking my fingers back and forth along the seam of my panties before gently pushing them aside.
“Kinsley, I want you to touch yourself.”
I inhaled sharply and let my fingers drift lower, along the sensitive skin of my upper thigh.
“Maybe I already am.”
I could hear his slow smirk through the phone when he hummed in approval. “Stroke yourself like I would if I was there.” His tone was dark and more seductive than I’d ever experienced. I’d never been bold enough to do something like that while someone listened, but I didn’t hesitate for one moment.
I let my fingers glide between my thighs, stroking slow at first, and then faster and faster as he spoke dirty thoughts through the phone.
“I wish I could feel how wet you are right now.”
His heavy breaths spilled through the phone and I sped up my pace even more. I dipped my finger inside and pulled my wetness up toward my bundle of nerves, reveling in the sexy moment.
“I’m so close, Liam,” I admitted with a weak voice.
“I bet you taste so sweet, baby. I’d slide my fingers in and out, and then lean down and taste you for myself.”
“Liam…”
“Come for me, baby. Let me hear you.”
I stroked faster, arching my back and feeling the beginning of tingles spread through my body.
“I can’t wait to sink into you, Kinsley. Promise me you’ll spread those thighs wide for me.”
Those sexy words pushed me over the edge and I lost myself in the bliss of the moment. It rolled through me in a seductive wave and I liked knowing he could hear my moans. I purposely made sure he knew just how much I was enjoying my orgasm.
When I stopped shaking, Liam spoke, “Fuck, baby, I loved listening to that.”
I tugged a pillow to my chest and smiled up at the dark ceiling, suddenly feeling embarrassed for getting so carried away.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, coach.”
I hung up the phone before he could answer and squeezed my eyes shut. My phone buzzed in my hand and I looked down to see he’d sent one last text.
Liam: Don’t make any plans for tomorrow night.
Liam Wilder brought out a side of me that no guy had seen before. It was a little wild and a little reckless, but with him, there was no other option.
Chapter Fifteen
Monday morning I was positively giddy on my way to practice. Becca and Emily said that I looked loony, but I ignored them.
"It's just a beautiful day!" I joked, pulling my car into my normal spot at the fields. Since Liam got back from New York the night before, he'd be at practice. We had plans to meet up later, but I wasn't sure where we were going yet.
"You're so annoying," Becca laughed, sliding out of the passenger seat. As soon as her feet hit the pavement, she paused and I watched her smile fall.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, leaning forward to see around her. From my seat I couldn't see what she was staring at, so I quickly hopped out of the car and ran around to find a sight that made me tighten my fists.
Josh was waiting for me at the front of the field house with a bouquet of flowers and a giant sign that said, "I'm sorry, Kinsley".
"Oh my god," I murmured under my breath. This was not appropriate. One glance around the packed parking lot and I knew that everyone on my team, my coaches, and Liam had already seen him. I couldn't believe he was doing this.
I walked straight up to him, trying to stay calm. He smiled wide when he saw me approaching and for a very, very brief moment I felt pity for him… but then I remembered the Bimbo naked on his bed.
"Josh, what are you doing here?" I asked with a tired tone.
He unraveled a lopsided grin. "Isn't it kind of obvious?" he joked, pointing to the "I'm sorry" sign.
I nodded slowly, trying to conjure up the right words. Emily and Becca walked past me into the soccer field house but I couldn't look at them. I wished Josh knew me enough to realize th
at something like this was truly embarrassing for me. I wasn't a public person. I didn't want my entire team knowing the sordid details of our relationship. This was too much, and if anything, it pushed me away even more.
"Josh, you can't do this. We're not together and it's for a very good reason. I freaking swear that I'm not trying to be coy and lead you on. I mean it when I say that we aren't getting back together. You have to leave me alone."
His face fell slightly and his dark brown eyes studied me with curiosity.
"You don't give up on things that matter to you, Kinsley. That's not the way love works," he said, pushing the flowers into my hand and heading toward his car.
I wanted to shout after him, to tell him he didn't know how love worked, that you don’t cheat on someone that you love, but I just pushed through the field house doors and headed to practice.
My worst fear would be realizing that love actually did mean what Josh thought it meant: you could do whatever you wanted to your partner as long as you said you were sorry and looked charming while you said it. Nope. I respected myself too much for that.
I dropped his flowers in the locker room just as I realized that I needed to find Liam. I had no clue if he’d seen Josh’s display, but if the situation were reversed, I would have hated seeing his ex-girlfriend standing there waiting for him. I didn’t want him to misread the situation.
I didn’t get the chance to see him until we lined up outside for drills. I purposely stood on the end so that if he wanted to, he could talk to me. When I smelled his body wash behind me, I sighed. At least he wasn’t so angry that he was going to ignore me.
"Are you okay?" he asked, taking me by surprise.
"I'm fine. I'm sorry that happened," I began just as one of the junior girls inched closer to me. Her innocent action didn’t go unnoticed and I realized I had to guard my speech.
"That was really unprofessional," I said, looking up at him and pleading with him to understand my veiled words. His eyes weren't angry or brooding, instead he was studying me with a wistful smile.