Last night seems like a blur. A fancy, dark, scary blur. It has been on rerun on a constant loop all day. The three of us arrived back in London at just gone five this morning. Stan quickly disappeared into his flat while Drake and I made our way up to our flat in a sober, tired state.
While Drake was awake and ravishing my body I was fine, completely taken with the rush he was feeling. He had pulled it off and even better, he had anticipated Tommy’s betrayal and diverted being duped over. The minute he fell asleep and my mind had the chance to be alone with my thoughts, they turned dark.
I detached myself from Drake’s side and made my way to the living room so my tossing and turning wouldn’t wake him up. I saw the sun rise and I’m still on the sofa, unable to sleep as the sun sets.
Drawing my knees up to my chest, I rest my chin on my knees and watch the front door. Watch and wait, wait, watch, it is all I can manage to do.
“Have you slept at all?”
I pull my eyes away from the door and turn them to see Drake shuffling across the room in only his joggers and bare chest. His hair spiking out in all directions and his eyes puffy with thick sleep.
I shake my head and lean into him as he throws himself beside me on the sofa.
I was adamant that I wanted to be by Drake’s side the whole time, I wanted, no I needed to see what he did so it wouldn’t eat at me imagining all sorts waiting for him to return.
Like always since I met Drake, my first instinct wasn’t to run away from him when he did anything bad. Instead, this time I joined him. Not once did I think about the aftermath. Now we are in the aftermath, I’m terrified and the weird thing is, I’m not terrified for myself. I am so scared for Drake. He went to prison without a seconds thought for me when I needed Calvin James to feel pain like I was feeling, this time, he assures me even if his name comes up over this diamond, he will run. He will never leave me again and the thought of not running with him never crosses my mind. I lived without him once but never again. I never know where our lives are going, we can never plan for the future because we don’t know what is going to catch up with him but at the same time, I am prepared to live on the edge with him, because on the edge with Drake is all I need.
“Talk to me, what’s keeping you awake?” he asks, sliding his arm around me.
“I keep expecting the police to come and kick down the door,” I admit.
“Don’t.” he shrugs.
He isn’t telling me to shut up, he says it as if I’m being silly.
“Drake…”
He cuts me off and squeezes his arm around me tighter.
“No, I’m not going anywhere. Whether the police come or not is irrelevant, we won’t be here to find out.”
What? This is news to me. I sit up and turn to face him.
“Where are we going?” I ask, needing to know.
“Anywhere,” he shrugs again, “We won’t stay here though.”
Frowning, I look around our home and realise I am going to miss it. It was all white and bland when I moved in and now it full of colour and touches I have added to it.
Each piece of furniture placed where I think fits best and every photograph framed and hung in perfect place. This is our home.
Staring at a photo of Drake and I just after he was released I am caught mid yawn and Drake stands, taking hold of my hand.
“Come back to bed, you’re going to need all the rest you can get,” he orders, giving me no choice in the matter when he pulls me up to my feet.
He leads us through to the bedroom and rearranges the duvet signalling for me to climb in.
The sheets are still warm and I plump my pillow trying to get comfortable. Drake cuddles me from behind and tucks my hair to the side. His heat pores into me and I let myself relax. As long as I can feel him, I can sleep now.
“You are always so warm,” I sigh, pushing closer back into him.
“I’ve got you to keep warm,” he says, brushing his lips against my back.
His hand snakes round and grasps my hand that holds his ring.
“Rather than worry about me, plan our wedding. From now on, that is the only thing you are allowed to think about.”
Funnily enough, that was the other thing on my mind, keeping me awake.
The wedding. Every girl dreams of her big day, the dress, the cake and what music she will be walking down the aisle to linking her arm through her father’s. Only our wedding won’t be nothing like that. I could laugh at myself, my parents wouldn’t want to celebrate our day any more than Tommy would. I don’t particularly want them there after everything but a little part of me is sad I won’t have what everyone else has.
“What now? I can feel the tension radiating off you.”
“Neither of us will have our parents there.”
As soon as I’ve said it, Drake tenses.
“We’re not marrying our parents, so it’s not essential they’re there,” he points out after a beat of silence.
“You know what I mean, Drake.”
“Cam, they haven’t made contact with you in three years. Why would you want them anywhere near us on our day? And as for my parents, that’s hardly going to be a problem for me,” he snorts, completely unaffected. “As long as you’re there with me, that’s all that counts. We’ve only had each other all this time, I don’t see why you would start thinking of them now,” he adds.
He’s right, I guess I got caught up in the sentimental baggage that comes with getting married.
Forgetting all about everything, I push my arse back into his groin and grind against him. A sure way to forget about everything or at least that is what I hoped.
“No, sleep now. We need all our energy tomorrow,” he tells me, for the first time ever refusing my body.
“Care to share,” I ask, feeling the sting of rejection. Something I thought I would never feel from this man.
“Nope, but you’ll need a passport. Please tell me you have one, otherwise I’ll have to get you one.”
I daren’t ask how he could get me one but fortunately I do own an in date passport.
“I do but it’s still at my parents’ house.”
I feel his chest heave a heavy sigh and feel like I have to explain.
“I was in such a rush the night I left, I didn’t think about it.”
“I’ll get it,” he says.
“How?”
“I just will.”
To get it he is going to have to go back to Great Yarmouth.
“I’m coming with you,” I say, not giving him the chance to argue with him.
“Of course you are, now go to sleep.”
When I wake I feel like I have slept for a hundred years and not at all. Rolling over to find Drake’s heat, I find I am alone. Groaning and stretching my body, I glance at the clock to find it is only midnight. Throwing the duvet off, a piece of paper floats to the floor beside Drake’s side of the bed.
‘Gone to cash in, D xx’
I didn’t expect to go with him for this part, the less I know from now on, the easier it will be to forget it ever happened.
I carry on to the bathroom and take care of my needs before heading into the kitchen and heaping coffee into the percolator.
Scouting my mobile on the table, I think about my mother.
It is too late to call and I wouldn’t want my father to answer. I decide to message her instead.
What do I say after all this time? I go for the easy option and type out a quick text asking her to call me, she might not have the same number anymore.
The phone rings before I can put it down, it’s my mother’s number showing.
I hit answer and hold it to my ear.
“Mum?”
“Camila?”
Her voice is so timid and quiet. I can barely hear her. It also brings floods of emotion to me I never knew existed inside me towards her.
“It’s me…”
I close my mouth not knowing what else to say.
“It’s late, Cammie
. I only heard your message come through because I was getting a glass of water. If your father hears, I’ll have to go,” she says, keeping her voice down. My father must be in bed.
“I haven’t heard from you in years, what do you want?” she asks.
What do I want? How about parents that would be distraught if they found out their only daughter was getting married and they knew nothing about it.
I settle for what I can have and say, “I need my passport, it was last in my drawer in my room.”
Unless they demolished everything I left behind and got rid of anything that reminded them of me.
“You’re coming here?” she blurts out louder than the rest of our conversation.
“I need my passport,” I reply, not liking her tone.
“I don’t think it will be wise to come to the house, I’ll meet you in town. At the coffee shop where you used to work, does that work for you?” she asks, back to being quiet.
“Sure,” I choke out.
There is no joy to hear my voice or demands to know where I am or how I am doing. It shouldn’t hurt but it does.
Drake will want to do this as soon as possible, I don’t know what he has planned but I got the idea that I needed that passport soon.
“I’ll text you later today and let you know when we’ll be in town,” I say.
“Oh, your boyfriend will be coming with you?” she asks, sounding surprised.
“Of course he will.”
“Okay, I’ll wait to hear from you,” she says and hangs up on me.
Chucking my phone on the side, I pour myself a cup of coffee and sit on the counter where I can see out of the window and onto the street below.
I stay on the counter till my bum goes numb and decide to pack Drake and I a bag. The sooner we are out of here the sooner I can move on from feeling trapped.
An hour later our bag was ready to go and there was still no sign of Drake. I couldn’t face going back to bed alone, I curl up on the sofa and wait for Drake there to finish his business.
Chapter Thirty-One
Drake
The sound of the engine roars down the road. This is one of my favourite times of the day, first thing in the morning just before the dark falls to day. A scatter of people milling around either on their way home after making a night’s worth of mistakes or on their way to work. Road sweepers with their orange flashing lights brightening the predawn sky. It is the quietest I’ve heard London. Many times I have been in this moment of enjoying the small things around me on my way home after a night out or escaping a one-night stand. Christ, I can’t remember the last time I had meaningless sex. Every time I’m with Cammie, it means everything.
Swivelling in my seat I take another look at the six black, heavy bags filled with two point six million pounds. Fedor Kozlov, our Russian buyer nearly wet himself with glee when he feasted his eyes on the diamond. One point three mil each and now life can begin.
“WOOOO.” I holler, banging my palms on the dash board, “All that fucking cash, mate. Our best payday to date.”
“You’re not fucking wrong, Drake,” Stan agrees, with the biggest grin on his face.
“I’d appreciate it if we kept this from Lorna, the woman would spend it faster than she makes me come,” he says, seriously.
“Sure, I’ll talk to Cammie too.”
He parks up outside our building but neither of us make a move to get out. I light up a cigarette and pass the packet over to Stan. After he lights his own, the car slowly begins to fill with smoke. Unwinding the window a little, we sit soaking in the high of what we’ve done.
“All these years, all the jobs we’ve done together, the times we nearly got caught,” Stan stops and laugh, “All the times we did get caught, none were as easy and rewarding as this one.”
I laugh myself, we have had some of the best times of my life dibbling here and dabbling there. The rest of my best moments lay with Cammie.
“It’s been long overdue.”
“Are we still on for tomorrow? I’ll have Lorna packed and ready to go by ten am sharpish.”
“Yeah, I’ll be gone today. Cammie’s passport is back at her parent’s house so we’ll be heading up to Norfolk later,” I tell him, keeping him in the loop.
“Good luck with that,” he snorts, opening his door.
I open mine and we open each side of the back and grab three bags each. Bitter, cold air snaps at my fingers exposed to the coming winter and I briskly unlock the main door while Stan locks his car. Holding the door open for him, I wait for him to pass before following him up to the first floor
We reach his door and he stops and turns around. He drops the bags by his feet and embraces me, wrapping his hard arms around me. Momentarily, I am too stunned to move. He is the only man who could get away with this without me ripping his head off for it.
I return his hold and slap him on the back.
“After tomorrow I don’t know where we’re going to be and I want you to know I’ve got your back, wherever we both end up. You only need to call, mate.”
Our friendship was formed on the playground at East Denes primary school and has lasted to this day, I haven’t thought about it before, but he is the one man I instinctively trust. Realising I have two people I can trust implicitly, I pick up my half of the bags and give him one last nod.
My flat is quiet when I open the door, the sounds of my jacket chaffing and the bags hitting the floor are the only noises surrounding me.
Cammie is curled up on the sofa and is sleeping soundly. I had hoped to be back before she woke up and noticed I was gone.
Different ideas of how I could wake her up ran through my mind, I settled for the one I’ve always wanted to do and unzip one of the holdalls.
Standing above her angelic form, her breathing is even and mine is coming fast, I empty one of the holdalls over her and watch the cash scatter down over her.
“What the hell?” she croaks, slowly waking to the money tickling her face.
“It’s payday, baby.” I laugh, unzipping the other two holdalls.
“I never thought I’d come back here,” she murmurs, from the passenger seat.
We have just driven into Great Yarmouth and the place looks like a shit heap.
“I hoped you wouldn’t have to,” I mutter, meaning every word.
The drive has been unusually quiet and I gathered it was because she is nervous. Of course, she has nothing physically to worry about while I am with her but I’m not stupid to know I can’t stop her nerves of being rejected again.
If I had my way, I would have drove up here on my own and retrieved her passport without her knowledge or her parents of me being in their home.
As it is, her mother doesn’t want her in the house, choosing to meet in the café where Cammie used to work instead. I remember my way around this town like it was yesterday, when I first saw Cammie, I made it my mission to know everything about her, including her town.
In the winter the town is empty, we drive through the streets with ease and find ample parking in the town centre.
“You know, I could go in and get it and you wouldn’t have to see her?” I offer.
“No, it’s okay. I think I need to see her.”
The coffee shop isn’t far from the car and the wind snaps at our heels, ushering us inside double time.
The place hasn’t changed a bit, Cammie scouts the place and frowns a little. I hope it isn’t regret. I let her keep her job at the café back in London, well, not now she doesn’t. She can damn well call Les and quit as soon as we get home. She chooses a table by the window and it gives me a memory of my first time here.
“This is where you first sat when you came in,” she smiles, pulling up a third chair ready for her mother’s arrival.
“You remember?”
“Of course I do, I remember everything about you,” she grins.
Our heads are bent together talking quietly when a timid throat clearing gets our attention.
“
Hello, Cammie.”
The woman finally says.
“Mum, you remember Drake?”
“How could I forget?”
I don’t like the sound of her tone but I keep my mouth shut for Cammie’s sake and prepare myself to whisk my girl if needs be at a seconds notice.
“You look…good.”
She speaks only to Cammie as if I am not here, sitting mere inches from her.
“Thank you. Did you manage to bring my passport?” she asks her mother.
Her mother’s reply is her pulling the item out of her purse and sliding it across the table in Cammie’s direction. Tension rolls off mother and daughter in droves, and it is like watching two strangers meeting for the first time against their will.
It doesn’t surprise me when Mrs Darcy stands to leave, it angers me.
“Nine words, is that all your daughter gets from you after all this time?” I spit, pushing my chair back to block her exit.
“Let her leave, Drake. It doesn’t matter, we’ve got what we came for.”
“It does matter to you, babe. I see it all over your face.”
Mrs Darcy takes her seat once more and fidgets nervously.
“Mum, you don’t have to stay. Drake, don’t stop her,” Cammie warns, but the conviction is lost in her voice.
The tears pooling in her eyes make me blind with fury that only Cammie’s hand on my thigh under the table can soothe.
“Your boyfriend is right, I’m sorry. I think about you every day, it’s just, if your father finds out I’ve seen you…”
She doesn’t finish her sentence and Cammie stones over at the mention of her father.
“Fiancée,” I correct her.
Mrs Darcy’s eyes widen and locate the ring on her daughter’s finger.
“I’ve often wondered if you were still together,” she murmurs.
“We’re very much together, don’t fret, she didn’t leave you for nothing.”
“Drake,” Cammie snaps, “Why don’t you go out for a cigarette.”
She isn’t asking me, she’s telling me.
To be fair, I expected this. We both know I can’t keep my mouth shut for shit.
“All I need to see is one tear roll down her cheek and I’ll be back in here so fast, you’d think I’d never left. Understand?”