My partner grimaced with a shake of his head. “Goddamn traffic. At some point, California really should try to put a cap on the amount of people they allow to relocate here from other countries—hell, even other states. It’s getting more and more crowded every day. They say an earthquake is going to make the state fall off into the sea, but I say the weight of all the goddamn people living here will be the cause.”
“I relocated from out of state,” I reminded him. “So did Cassidy.”
“Yeah, but at least you two are contributing something. Too many numbnuts out there dreaming of being discovered for the silver screen or making it big in the music industry,” he said with a shake of his head.
Wade was grouchy before, but he’d gotten surlier over the last couple of years. He reminded me more and more every day of Max from Grumpy Old Men. His hair was more gray than black now, balding just at the crown. His skin had started to show deeper wrinkles, and age spots had popped up all over his face and hands, the appearance of which had probably been accelerated courtesy of too much time spent out under the California sun.
I chuckled at his prediction, not entirely sure how I managed it when my mood was every bit as cantankerous as his, thanks to the morning I’d had thus far. “Maybe you need a break, Wade. Take a timeout and go enjoy the tranquillity of Lake Tahoe for a while.”
“Funny you should mention that,” he said, shifting in his seat. “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”
Wade going on vacation was hardly a serious enough matter to warrant my rush into the office this morning. There had to be something more to it. Maybe he was going to force me to take a vacation? Or worse…a permanent vacation. Could he do that?
I started mentally poring through my contract while trying to think of any offenses I might have made and whether it was possible that there’d been a secret board meeting to discuss my removal.
“Matthews, are you okay?” Wade’s brow was furrowed with concern. “Christ, man, you’re sweating bullets over there. If you’re sick and need to take some time off—”
“I’m fine,” I told him. “Just not entirely sure what all of this is about. Don’t leave me hanging. What’s going on?”
For the first time since I’d met Wade, he slouched in his chair, looking worse for the wear. “I’m done, son. Ready to hang it up, kick back, and enjoy the rest of my life.”
I was still confused. “What does that mean?”
“It means I’ve decided to retire. Done deal. I’ve been thinking about it for a long time now and don’t need to think about it anymore,” he said with a note of finality, one meant to shut down any argument I might try to throw his way to dissuade him. “Obviously, I wanted to tell you before I announce it to the rest of the staff this afternoon.”
I was stunned silent. The retirement of SSE’s co-founder, Monty Prather, was what had spurred the competition between Cassidy and me, which had landed me the partnership in the first place. But Wade? Striker was his baby. He’d been the one to bring Monty onboard before the doors had ever opened for business. I’d felt sure he’d never let it go, that he’d hold on to it with a death grip until death finally gripped him.
And then an even heavier weight circled my neck like a horseshoe around a stake to bear down on my shoulders. “Of course. Thank you for the heads-up. But I have to ask what this will mean for Striker. For me?”
“Striker is still going to be here. Don’t you worry about that,” he assured me. “I’m not selling, and neither is Monty. But I’m turning over the reins of the day-to-day business to you. Monty and I have discussed it, and we feel given the added stress of keeping us out of the poor house, a larger percentage of the shares would be in order.”
“That’s, um…that’s a relief.” At least I didn’t have to worry about being unemployed. “But it’s also a whole lot of responsibility to take on by myself.”
“Oh, sorry.” Wade laughed. “Forgot the last part. I’m going to see to it that you’re not doing it all on your own. I know you like to take the hands-on approach, keeping your skills sharp with your own clients, and I respect that. Always have. Gotta lead by example, after all.”
“I’m glad you can appreciate that, Wade. So I can expect a replacement for you, then?”
“Well, no one can replace me.” He laughed, metaphorically patting himself on the back. “But I’m not going to burden you with trying to find someone who can come close. I know you have your plate full enough. So before I make my grand exit—and I am hoping for an elaborate retirement party,” he not so subtly hinted, “I’ll make sure the most qualified candidate I can find is in place and ready to stand by your side at the helm.”
I wasn’t really sure how I felt about that. Wade was more than capable of choosing his replacement, but I would’ve liked to have a say in the final decision. Still, he was right. I did have a full plate. Dealing with headhunters and conducting interviews would only tie up even more of my time. Time I needed to devote to Marcel and, more important, to my family. So I supposed I should’ve been grateful for the assistance. Besides, contrary to what Cassidy had always believed about me—and had no doubt relayed to her mentor, Wade—I could play well with others. I’d adjust. Period.
“One more thing,” I said. “Will this person you find also be a partner? If so, how will the share split go then?”
When I had become a partner, I wasn’t an equal partner. Wade held controlling interest with 51 percent, Monty (a silent partner) still held 24 percent, and I had the remaining 25 percent. If Wade and Monty planned to sell off their shares, I could be in a whole lot of trouble. So could SSE, its employees, and its clients.
He chuckled. “That’s my boy. I would have been disappointed if you hadn’t asked.” He re-crossed his legs. “The replacement will be auditioning, so to speak, for a role as partner. We want to make sure the person we find will be a viable contribution to the future of SSE. Once you, Monty, and I are convinced the new person has proven himself, we’ll make it official. The share split will be Monty and me at ten percent each, the new partner at thirty, and you with fifty. As Monty and I, inevitably, die off, our shares will go to the new partner to balance things out. Until then, you’ll be making more than the rest of us.” He laughed. “You’ve more than earned it, and Monty and I will feel safe knowing SSE is in your hands.”
“Wow. That’s quite an honor. I don’t know what to say,” I admitted.
“Just say yes, my boy.”
It was a lot to take in, an even bigger responsibility. Though wasn’t this exactly what I’d worked so hard for? Wasn’t this the dream I’d had as a practically orphaned child with no prospect of a promising future? I’d have a real legacy, half of a more than prosperous company. Abe could follow in his father’s footsteps and be proud to stand where I once stood. Generations after him could do the same. I could start a true legacy. Right here. Right now. I could really be worthy of a woman like Cassidy.
Smacking my hand on the desk, much like a judge’s gavel at a final verdict, I answered, “Yes!” and then I sat back with a sigh of relief. A very major decision had just been made, but it was one that I felt good about.
“Excellent!” Wade said. “Monty will be so proud of his protégé’s enthusiasm. You’ve never disappointed, Matthews. I wouldn’t be able to make this leap if I didn’t have the utmost confidence in you.”
“Thank you for saying so, Wade. I sure am sorry to see you go, and admittedly, maybe even a little jealous of all the free time you’re about to get, but I can’t think of many other people who deserve it more.” It was true. Wade had built SSE from the ground up, now boasting a clientele roster of the most well-known athletes in every sport imaginable. “Thank you for taking care of finding our next partner. Though I know he’ll never be a match to you, I’ll try not to hold it against him.”
“Good man,” he said, standing. “I’m sure I never did the same with you.” He winked playfully before coming over to shake my hand. As he made his exit
to get on with his day and leave me to mine, he stopped and looked back over his shoulder. “Oh, and he could very well turn out to be a she. You might want to be prepared for that, just in case.”
I had absolutely no problem with that. I was just glad I didn’t have to make the decision one way or the other.
—
The rest of my day had been hectic, as usual. Though I was still bothered by the exchange I’d had with Cassidy that morning, I hadn’t had the time to dwell on it. Between going over my strategy concerning Marcel, handling a contract crisis for one of my top clients, reviewing contracts Ben had drawn up for a couple others, I’d had enough to stay distracted—to say the very least.
And then came the staff meeting.
Wade had made the announcement about his retirement, inviting anyone who felt qualified to submit his or her résumé for consideration. Though everyone at SSE was sad for Wade to go, the excited chatter over the prospect of having a shot at the partnership had become like white noise in the background. There was no guarantee the next partner would be someone internal, but Wade liked to keep things close to home, so it was possible. If one of our agents got it, I was going to make sure my assistant, Ben, got a promotion to fill the vacancy. I’d miss him, but I couldn’t hold him back for selfish reasons.
Ally, Cassidy’s old assistant, seemed less than interested in the partnership. Of course, she’d only been an agent for around three and a half years, taking over Cassidy’s clients when she’d gone on a maternity leave that had turned into her resignation. I was proud of the work Ally had done. She was like a carbon copy of Cassidy in the way she approached and landed a client. The roster she’d inherited from her former boss had been free to choose another agent, but they’d all declined after private meetings with Cassidy to discuss Ally’s capabilities.
After the staff meeting, I didn’t dally. I didn’t even make a stop off at Monkey Business. I had one goal in mind: calling a cease-fire with the woman I loved, who had felt less-than as of late, and spending some quality time with my family. I had a lot of groveling to do. Groveling that would hopefully lead to the best makeup sex we’d ever had. I’d sort of missed throwing her against the wall to bury my cock balls deep in her delectable pussy. Hell, I sort of even felt like having her juices for dessert before that.
Once we made up with the nicey-nice and were each perfectly sated, I was going to tell Cassidy the big news Wade had shared, how our lives were going to change for the better. I was going to own Striker with the majority share. God, I couldn’t wait to see her look at me with pride when she realized all my hard work had finally paid off, that my absenteeism hadn’t been for nothing. I finally had something. And it was pretty damn big.
But all of my excitement, my feeling of accomplishment, flew right out the window the moment I stepped over the threshold and into the home we shared. Cassidy was in our bedroom, zipping up a suitcase while Abe played on the floor.
Weird.
“Daddy!” Abe squealed when he saw me and then ran over to hug my leg. I really fucking loved it when he did that.
“Hey, little man! Did you have big fun today?” I sat my briefcase on the floor and bent over to kiss his forehead before straightening to discern the scene before me more closely.
“Mommy and I pwayed pack-it-or-weave-it today,” he told me with an adorable smile that showed all his baby teeth.
“You did, did you? I bet that was big fun.” I turned my attention to Cassidy then, more than concerned, but unwilling to jump to conclusions. “Was that a game or are you actually going somewhere?”
“Both.” Though it was only one syllable, I could hear the disdain in her voice. Uh-oh, I was still in the doghouse.
“Really? And where might you be going?”
“Stonington.” Her answer was short. Clipped.
And surprising. Shit. Had we had a conversation about this? No, I was sure we hadn’t. Though if I were wrong, she was definitely going to jump all over it, once again telling me how much I don’t pay attention to her when she talks. It wasn’t true. Most of the time. Okay, it was true more than it should be, but this was not one of those times.
“Huh. Okay, then. I mean, a little warning would’ve been nice, but I think a visit to see Pop-Pop and Mimi would do my boy some good.” I lifted Abe off the floor and tossed him into the air, earning a giggle in turn. After the day I’d had, I really needed it. Tucking my arm under his little tush to hold him, I kissed his forehead and then ruffled his hair. “And I’m sure Mommy could use a bit of fresh air, too.”
Cassidy yanked the suitcase from the bed and onto the floor. The thing nearly pulled her arm out of the socket, clueing me in to just how heavy it was. Blowing her crimson locks out of her face with a huff, she stood and put those damn hands of hers on those damn hips. Jesus, what had I done this time?
“Fresh? Because things have gotten so stale around here, you mean.”
With a sigh, I sat Abe down so his squirmy butt could get back to playing with his Superman and Batman action figures while Mommy and I had yet another strained discussion. “Stop putting words into my mouth, Cass. I was only trying to say a short vacation might do you some good. Maybe for both of us.”
“My thoughts exactly. Only, it won’t be a short vacation.” She went over to her dresser, rifling through her jewelry box.
“Oh, okay. An extended vacation. When will you be back?” I started toward the closet to get out of my suit and put on something more comfortable.
“We’re not coming back, Shaw.”
Stopping in my tracks, I turned to face her, sure I hadn’t heard her right. “I’m sorry, what?”
“For once, you actually did hear me. Bully for you, Matthews,” she said sarcastically without looking up. Matthews was what she’d called me when we were at odds with each other.
“Is this about what I said this morning? Because I didn’t mean it. I was frustrated and running late, and shit…I just said what I thought you wanted to hear.”
“You thought I wanted to hear that you don’t feel the same way about me as you used to?”
I rubbed my hand over my face, frustrated that nothing was coming out quite the way I wanted it to. “No. I’m sorry, okay? It was eating at me all day. I was going to call to apologize, but—”
“Something came up. Right?” she finished for me. I’d never seen her so fed up. It unnerved me to the bone. “Something always comes up, Shaw. Always. You have an excuse for not being here. You have an excuse for not showing up on time for our appointments. You have an excuse for breaking promises to our son. You have an excuse for saying hurtful things that you can’t take back. You always have an excuse. And when you don’t, I’m making them for you. Not anymore. I’m done with the excuses. I’m done trying to be the glue that holds all of this together without any assistance from you. I’m done being taken for granted, and I’m done with being unappreciated.” Closing her jewelry box, she stuffed the little travel bag into her purse, zipping it up and hoisting it over her shoulder, and then she turned to face off with me. “I’m just plain done. Clearly, you are, too. So I’m taking Abe back home to Stonington to raise him. At least there, neither of us will be in the way of your rise to superstardom any longer. Enjoy your career. Come on, Abey Baby.”
The moment Cassidy took Abe’s hand and grabbed the suitcase in her other, my whole world came crashing down around me. She wasn’t bluffing; she was serious. And she had my undivided attention.
“Stop,” I said, blocking her way. “Where do you think you’re going?”
“I already told you, Shaw. I’ll call you once we’ve both had time to process this to discuss custody and visitation, but not right now. Move.” She made to go around me, but I stepped in the way again.
“No,” I said, shaking my head. I was near panic, unable to say or do much more than repeat the same word and action. “No, no, no.” Not my son. Not her. I couldn’t stomach either of them walking out that door. I was going to be sick. Or maybe I was
about to have a heart attack because there was this unbearable pressure building in my chest, and shit all over my body was going numb and cold as if the circulation of blood had simply decided it was as done as Cassidy was.
“You can’t go,” I choked out.
“I have to go, Shaw. Because I can’t stay. Not like this. I just can’t do it anymore.” She closed her eyes, her shoulders sagging. “I’m tired.”
She did look tired. Not only tired, defeated. There was an empty sort of sadness to eyes that were once as vibrant and green as new leaves in the spring. They were puffy and red now, and the tip of her nose was tinged pink. She’d been crying. I’d done that, hadn’t I? How had I missed it before?
“I’m sorry,” I told her, meaning every single syllable.
She shook her head. “I wish that fixed things, but it doesn’t.”
“What will? Tell me. I’ll do anything. Just don’t leave me. Please.” I’d never begged for anything, had never felt the need to because there wasn’t anything I’d wanted bad enough.
The room went quiet except for the whooshing sounds Abe made as he flew Superman through the air. I turned to look at him, unable to fight the grin that tugged at my lips when Superman swooped down to punch Batman with a loud “Pow!” from my baby boy.
Cassidy stooped down to Abe’s level, stilling his play as she gave him a forced smile with tears swimming in her eyes. “Sweetie, I want you to go play in your room for a little bit while Mommy and Daddy have a talk. Okay?”
“We’re not going bye-bye, Mommy?”
“You’re not going anywhere, little man. You’re staying right here,” I told him.
Cassidy gave me a disapproving look, then turned back to Abe. “Not just yet, baby. Be my sweet boy and go play for now.”
“Okay!”
Cassidy kissed our son’s forehead before he grabbed up his toys and ran off to his room. When she stood, she used the back of her hand to wipe a tear from her cheek and then faced me again.
I wanted to wrap my arms around her and thank God for the near miss of losing the woman I loved, but I knew I couldn’t. Not yet. For one, the vibes were all kinds of “keep your distance” and for two, though I was relieved she hadn’t left, I was also pissed that walking out on me and taking my son had been the plan.