‘Oh, please don’t,’ Jade said with distress. ‘Anyone want to dry off?’
We nodded. The cloud disappeared. A small whirlwind of warm air gave us a quick blow-dry.
‘Here they come,’ John said. ‘Nice and big. Stay very still, Simone. Michael, don’t try to take on these ones.’
‘What do we have here, people?’ I said.
‘Bugs,’ John said cheerfully.
I ran my hands through my damp hair and retied my ponytail. ‘Oh no, I hate bugs.’
‘What, the way they spray disgusting brown sludge everywhere when you smash their shells?’ John said with relish.
‘I think I’m going to be sick,’ I said quietly.
‘You can stand behind us if you like, dear,’ Meredith said. ‘You don’t have to face them if you don’t want to. It would probably be a good idea if you don’t take on these ones. We don’t want to put you at risk.’
‘Good practice for me,’ I said.
‘You’re quite right,’ John said. He stiffened. ‘Here they come. Weapons.’ ‘Coming,’ Gold said.
The demons materialised at the entrance to the alley, about fifty metres away. There were about twenty giant insects altogether. Ten were spiders that had poisonous fangs. Another five or so were cockroaches that would bite at anything within reach, releasing their venomous saliva. Another five were beetles that sprayed toxic green slime out of their back ends. Their jointed legs clicked on the concrete. Each must have been nearly three metres long and two high. They were huge.
‘God, I hate these things,’ I said.
‘You go berserk if there’s a tiny cockroach in your shower, and I have to kill it for you every time,’ John said, teasing. ‘You won’t even kill a little cockroach with a minuscule bolt of chi.’
‘I’ll kill bug demons with a big bolt though,’ I said. ‘But you know physical is the way to go with these things.’
‘Weapons, now,’ John said sharply. ‘My Lord,’ Jade said.
My sword appeared in front of me. I nodded to Jade and picked it out of the air. Michael took the White Tiger. The Shaolin Master summoned his staff. Meredith also had a sword, a long straight tai chi-style weapon. John raised his Celestial Seven Stars sword; it was enormous, nearly six feet long, and he carried it without difficulty. Jade and Gold didn’t need weapons. Jade’s claws were razor-sharp and deadly. Gold’s whole body was a lethal hammer of stone.
‘Make your sword sing, Emma,’ John said. ‘We’ll see if we can’t blow them up before they’re too close.’
The demons were about ten metres away. I pushed some chi into the sword and made it sing.
‘Oh no, Lord Xuan, you didn’t give her that sword, did you?’ Meredith said over the noise. ‘I was hoping it didn’t survive the Attack.’
The demons kept coming. The pinging ring of the sword covered the sound of their feet clicking on the concrete.
They kept coming. They were nearly five metres away.
‘Give up, Emma, it won’t work,’ John said over the noise.
I stopped the sound and my ears rang in the sudden silence. The insects stopped.
‘Me on point,’ John said. ‘Liu, Meredith, beside. Jade, Gold, Emma. Michael, Simone, behind. Now.’
We quickly moved into position, a V-shape, with John at the top and the children behind us.
The insects hesitated.
‘I will spare you if you turn,’ John said loudly.
They attacked.
A spider came at me. All I saw were fangs and big black hairy legs; it towered over me. It lowered its head to bite me, its enormous fangs extended and dripping venom.
I ducked and shot through underneath it, ripping its abdomen open as I went between its legs. I spun to face it as it turned. It didn’t seem to notice that its insides were hanging out. I ducked through again, this time diagonally, and took off a couple of legs as I went. It spun more clumsily with fewer legs. It reared up on its hind legs, and the disgusting stuff hanging from its open abdomen smeared on the ground.
It fell sideways, twitched, and curled up. It dissolved into a puddle of revolting brown goo that dissipated quickly. One.
Next was a cockroach. I hated these things: their shells were a good two centimetres thick and almost impossible to crack. Its razor-sharp mouthparts quivered, bubbling with venom. I ducked beneath its head, and its mouth just missed me on the way through. I shoved my sword up into the soft shell of the joint between its leg and its abdomen, then loaded the sword with chi and sent it right into the monster, frying it from the inside out.
The smell was indescribable. Good thing I hadn’t had too much for lunch. I ducked out from underneath it before it fell. It dropped vertically and didn’t move, then exploded into black feathery streamers. Two.
Another spider. I tried to move around the side to take its legs off, but it spun and quickly followed me. The venom dripped off its fangs and bubbled where it hit the ground. Its face grew an expression of insectile shock: Michael was cutting its legs off at the other end. The spider spun to face him, and as it did I took more legs off. When it was facing Michael and had its back to me I jumped onto its back and rammed my sword right into the top of its head, through the middle of its circle of eyes.
It crashed vertically. I leapt off. It dissolved. Three.
‘Well done, Michael,’ I said.
‘Behind you!’ he shouted.
I leapt sideways and the spray of venom missed me. I somersaulted backwards and landed on the beetle’s back. I ran my sword into the gap between its wing cases and sent a blast of chi into it. Its wing cases flew open, throwing me off without my sword. I landed lightly near its head. It didn’t move, it just watched me. Then its head fell off, it folded up sideways and dissolved. My sword fell to the ground and I collected it. Four.
Only two remained. John was having some fun with a spider; he moved so fast he was a blur. He was taking pieces of leg off one at a time, quite evenly, so that the spider was still able to walk. It grew shorter and shorter.
‘Finish it, you silly old man!’ I shouted.
He grinned over his shoulder, flashed over it in a huge somersaulting leap, and cut it completely in two from above.
Liu ran his staff through the last one’s head and it dissolved. None left.
We regrouped. I was the only one panting; the rest of them just grinned at each other. Blasted Immortals, they were having a good time and I was fighting for my life. I grinned too. Damn, but this was fun.
We checked Simone and Michael. They were fine. Simone wasn’t fazed by the insects; she didn’t seem to be frightened by any demons except Wong.
‘Again, Jade,’ John said. ‘Anyone poisoned?’
Everybody shook their heads as the warm shower washed us clean.
John smiled at me. ‘Well done.’
‘I hate those things.’
The warm wind dried us off.
His smile froze. All of them froze.
‘Move Simone and Michael over near the wall and stay there with them,’ he said, his eyes unseeing. ‘This is it.’
‘Is it him?’
‘Believe it or not,’ he said, his face expressionless, ‘it isn’t him at all.’ He gestured. ‘Go.’
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
The noise of the traffic outside stopped. There was complete silence. Once again there was the silent rush of sound and a huge vibration.
All the Immortals turned as one to face the entrance to the alley.
The sound of traditional Chinese music came from the end of the alley. Someone was playing pipes, and there was a drum and a gong. Marching feet, and a wet slithering sound. I’d heard that sound before, and a chill went through me as I remembered. A Snake Mother.
A small band of very low-level demons came first, in True Form, tiny, skinny and black with big ears and grotesque faces. They played the musical instruments and looked like a little naked marching band.
A huge sedan chair followed. It was the colour of dried blood with gol
d trimmings. Four very high-level demons carried it; these demons had the bodies of huge men.
They were about three metres tall, wore brown trousers, and were naked from the waist up. The two carrying the front of the chair had the heads of horses. The two at the back had the heads of bulls. John had mentioned these demons before but I’d never seen them. Apparently these particular ones spent most of their time in Hell.
John had referred to Hell once or twice in the past but wouldn’t elaborate.
Eight Snake Mothers slithered in formation around the sedan chair. Their front ends looked like men with the skin taken off; veins stood out over the muscles and the blood was clearly visible moving through them. From the waist down they were black snakes, oozing toxic slime.
John nodded and the two Masters Liu moved back together to protect Simone, Michael and myself as we stood against the wall.
‘I have never seen so many Mothers in one place outside the nests,’ Meredith said with wonder. ‘Liu, how about you? You have about six hundred years on me. Ever seen so many?’
‘Nope.’ Liu spoke to me over his shoulder. ‘Emma, did you bring a camera with you today?’
‘No need to when we come here. We all know this place inside out and have seen absolutely everything we need to see.’
‘Would have been nice to take a photo of this though,’ Meredith said. ‘He hardly ever comes out of Hell, and this is the second time this year.’
‘Who?’
‘The King of the Demons.’
‘Oh my God, no. John,’ I wailed softly. ‘No.’
‘He’ll be fine, my Lady,’ Shaolin Master Liu said. ‘The King is probably just here on a courtesy call. I think he wants to parley.’
‘But what about is anybody’s guess,’ Meredith said. ‘I can’t see what he would want to discuss with the Dark Lord. It’s only been a few months since he nearly destroyed the Mountain.’
John transformed into Celestial Form, nearly four metres tall. His hair was long and black and wild around his head. His face was square and dark and fearsome, with a long, thin black beard. He wore traditional Chinese black lacquer armour. He slid his Seven Stars sword into its scabbard on his back, then took a couple of enormous paces forward to face the sedan chair and crossed his arms over his chest.
Jade and Gold took Celestial Form as well. Each was around two and a half metres tall, slim and elegant, wearing long, flowing old-fashioned robes of embossed silk. Jade’s robes were green and Gold’s were tan. Jade’s shining dark green hair cascaded down to her knees, with elaborate buns and braids decorated with gold and jade on top of her head. Gold’s long flowing hair, tied on top, was snowy white with golden streaks through it, similar to the colour of his stone. They took up position as Retainers behind John.
Simone took a couple of staggering steps towards me. I quickly grabbed her and pulled her into me, burying her little face into my stomach. ‘Don’t worry, sweetheart, you know it’s only Daddy.’
She didn’t say anything, she just clutched my clothes with both hands.
The demons gently lowered the sedan chair. One of the horse-headed ones turned, went to the side of the chair, bowed, and opened the red fabric curtains.
Meredith and Liu moved very slightly closer to us. John, Jade and Gold didn’t move at all.
The King stepped out. He was about the same height as Xuan Wu, but where John was black, he was blood-red and gold. His young, fair face had a fine, ethereal beauty that was a stark contrast to Xuan Wu’s dark ugliness. His blood-red hair stood up at the top and swept in an enormous mane down to his waist behind him. He had blood-red bushy eyebrows but was otherwise clean-shaven. His maroon lacquer armour had gold trimmings, and he wore scaled boots of red and gold.
All of the Snake Mothers transformed at the same time. They turned into beautiful tall graceful women of all races, wearing identical blood-red cheongsams. They didn’t move a muscle otherwise.
The Demon King bowed and saluted John crisply.
John saluted back.
An enormous Chinese-style outdoor ceramic table appeared, large enough for them to sit. Six ceramic stools appeared around it. The Demon King walked stiffly to the table, held out one arm, bowed slightly, and gestured towards it.
John moved forward, bowed slightly, and gestured as well.
The Demon King nodded to John, flicked his robes under his armour, and sat gracefully at the table. John did the same thing. They sat on opposite sides of the table with their hands on it and studied each other calmly. Jade and Gold moved back and to one side to give them space to talk.
The Demon King turned his head to look me straight in the eye. A charming smile lit up his face and he nodded to me.
John stiffened very slightly.
The Demon King turned his attention back to John and said something. John replied. They spoke to each other calmly.
‘They’re just exchanging pleasantries right now, Emma,’ Meredith said. ‘Families, what they’ve been doing, meaningless conversation. It will take them a while to come to the point.’
The Demon King said something and John went still.
‘He is here to make an offer,’ Meredith said. ‘He knows about the activities of one of his sons.’
John said something in reply, his voice rumbling.
‘Lord Xuan said that this particular son has been—to use his own words, Emma—a right royal pain in the ass, and he would like to see the back of him any way possible,’ Meredith said with a touch of amusement.
The Demon King smiled as he said something and all of the Immortals stiffened. ‘No,’ Meredith whispered.
John remained unmoving. The King turned and smiled straight into my eyes again.
Another Immortal in Celestial Form appeared behind John. This one was white with gold trim on his armour. His hair was a huge mane of gold-streaked white that flowed wildly down his back and was tied loosely with a gold ribbon. White and gold. Bai Hu.
He stiffly saluted John and the Demon King, who both nodded formally in return. He sat next to John.
‘The Dark Lord has summoned the White Tiger to witness,’ Meredith said softly, her voice full of awe.
‘Holy shit,’ Michael said very softly under his breath.
‘What was the offer, Meredith?’ I whispered with frustration as I clutched Simone at my waist. ‘Tell me!’
‘I have been strictly ordered not to tell you, dear,’ Meredith said. ‘It wouldn’t be worth my job. All of us have been ordered most severely not to tell you.’
Then the offer must have been about me. Oh my God, I knew what it was. I saw the way the King looked at me.
I gently pushed Simone away, then gathered myself and made a huge leap from behind the protective pair of Immortals to land beside John at the parleying table. I could barely see over the table, it was so huge.
‘Please go back to the others, Emma,’ John said without looking at me. His voice sounded exactly as it always did.
‘No, no, the Lady is most welcome,’ the Demon King said, smiling broadly. ‘Would you like tea, my Lady?’
‘No, thank you.’ He was too high; I couldn’t see him properly. I climbed to sit cross-legged on the table, feeling like a leprechaun at a giants’ tea party. ‘I’d like an answer instead. Did you just offer a trade? Me for your one hundred and twenty-second son?’
John stiffened beside me. ‘Whoever told you that is out of a job and off my Mountain,’ he said, his voice a low rumble.
‘Nobody told me, old man,’ I retorted. ‘Nobody needed to. It was absolutely obvious.’
‘I must have her,’ the King said with a wide grin. He thumped the table with his fist. ‘Anything you want, Turtle. Anything at all. Just name it. I must have her.’
‘She. Is. Mine,’ John said very slowly and calmly.
‘No. I’m. Not,’ I said, matching his tone. ‘Right now, I belong to me. And if I decide to go with him, to keep Simone safe, then it has absolutely nothing to do with you.’
‘A
nything,’ the King said softly.
‘If I go with you, and stay with you, and don’t attempt to escape,’ I said to the King, ‘will you promise to keep Simone safe for the rest of her life?’
The King shot to his feet. ‘If you come with me and stay with me, I vow that Princess Simone, daughter of Xuan Wu Shang Di, will be perfectly safe for the rest of her natural life.’
‘How long is that vow good for?’ I said.
‘Forever,’ he said matter-of-factly as he sat again.
‘Is his word good, John?’ I said without looking at John by my side.
He didn’t reply.
‘Answer me!’ I still didn’t turn to him. ‘Is his word good?’
‘Yes, it is, my Lady,’ Bai Hu said from the other side of John, his voice full of awe.
‘Please do not do this thing, Emma,’ John whispered.
‘I won’t. Don’t be ridiculous. Right now you can defeat Wong. Why should I go with this guy? There’s really no point.’ I glared up at the Demon King. ‘Understand?’
He nodded. He smiled again, and his beautiful face lit up. ‘You are extremely remarkable.’
‘You owe me a gold coin,’ I shot back. ‘Listen to me, all of you.’ I felt ridiculous laying down the law to these giant fearsome deities. ‘I have made a promise to Xuan Wu to wait for him until he returns. Do you understand, Your Most Loathsome Majesty?’
The Demon King sat back, aghast. ‘How did you know my correct title?’
‘Look at yourself. Did you actually hear what I just said? Or are you too busy drooling at my tits to take any notice?’
‘You promised to wait for him.’ He grinned at John. ‘Of course she will keep her word to you. She is a woman of honour.’ He leaned back slightly, looked at me, then looked back at John and his grin widened. ‘But she didn’t say what she’d do while she waited!’
A shot of pain stabbed me right through. My throat thickened and I tried to swallow it. I looked down.
‘I will never love anyone else the way that I love you, Xuan Wu,’ I said softly to the table, ‘but I would do anything for Simone, you know that.’
The expression on John’s face matched my emotions, even through the Celestial Form.