They stood in the entryway of their apartment for ten minutes as Molly cried into his chest, making some hideous noises from the combination of snot and tears running out of her, but it didn’t deter Luke; he still loved her, no matter what kind of snotty mess she was. When Luke looked down at his watch and noticed that, if they didn’t get moving, they were going to be late, he pulled away and looked down at Molly.
Not meaning to be rude, but not being able to help himself, Luke let out a little laugh and shook his head. “Babe, you need to go….freshen up.”
Molly looked at his chest and said, “You do too,” with a shy smile.
Luke looked down at his once-white shirt and saw black mascara streaks all over it. He then looked up at Molly and said, “Thank God I have more than one nice dress shirt. Go get freshened up while I change and then I’ll drive us over.”
Molly nodded her head and went back to their bedroom a little hesitant, as if she didn’t want to break the spell that was between them. Little did she know, it wasn’t a spell, Luke was here to stay.
Luke went into Winnie’s room, gathered all his belongings that were spread out across the floor and brought them into their bedroom, the bedroom he’d once shared with Molly. He tossed his stuff in a chair and then took off his suit jacket and dress shirt. Molly was in the bathroom fixing her face and when she came back out and saw Luke’s belongings on the chair and him changing in their bedroom, new tears fell from her eyes.
Half-dressed, Luke pulled Molly into his chest and said, “Babe, you have to stop crying.”
“Are you moving in?” she asked in a timid voice. His Molly was never timid…ever. It hurt his heart that he’d made her this way.
“Yes, if you’ll have me, I would like to be Molly’s man again.”
That did it, she broke down to the floor and cried into her hands. Confused by her reaction, Luke slowly bent down next to her and rubbed her back. Before he knew what was happening, Molly tackled Luke to the ground and kissed him forcefully on the lips. It wasn’t a sweet kiss, there was no finesse at all…it was a kiss that claimed him. She was claiming him and hell if he wasn’t letting her. He wouldn’t want to be claimed by anyone else.
**Brady**
Ever since Dr. Cuevas said their baby’s heart was no longer beating, Brady felt like he’d been living an out of body experience, as if he could see himself from above making all the motions of living in real life, but experiencing no emotion…none.
Jane took up residence in their bed once the doctor released her from the hospital. She refused to acknowledge what happened once they wheeled our baby away; she refused to acknowledge the funeral and pretty much refused to acknowledge anyone around her.
The only reason Brady was standing in front of a foot-and-a-half-sized-casket with beautiful flowers surrounding it was because, when he called Albert, the amazing man stepped up and said he would take care of everything. He was even able to get Jane into some clothing and in a chair that sat front and center for the ceremony.
It was like they were two emotionless, walking zombies. Food was nowhere to be found in their lives, conversation was almost non-existent except for the occasional, “I’m going to bed,” and forget about the emotional connection they once had. Jane didn’t talk to him, even though Brady needed her more than anything right now, she shut him out. Whenever he tried to get close to her, just to even feel her skin, she would either start shouting or walk away. Brady preferred the shouting, because at least she was feeling something in those moments. When she walked around the house in a comatose state, that was when his heart started beating at an unhealthy rate and worry etched his forehead.
Brady didn’t make any requests for the funeral, except that Albert was to perform it and that he wanted a very small, private ceremony. Surprisingly, the usually-annoying paparazzi stayed far, far away, giving him and Jane some grieving time. Who knew the blood suckers actually had hearts?
Albert was talking about Baby Girl Matthews and how, even though they didn’t get to fully meet her, she still had a big impact on their lives. Tears fell from Brady’s eyes as he reached for Jane’s hand. She was sitting back in her chair, stiff as hell, wearing sunglasses and being very unresponsive. As Brady found Jane’s hand, he noticed how cold and pulled away she was. She was presently living with him, but her heart was nowhere to be found. It was like, when they wheeled their baby girl away, they wheeled away Jane’s soul as well.
Looking around, Brady noticed that Molly and Luke were holding hands as she cried into a handkerchief. Lucy was standing with Marc and Patty, but there was no sign of Connor. Parker and his girlfriend, whose name escaped Brady at the moment, stood next to him. Michael stood next to Brady, clasping his shoulder and giving him the strength that he needed. Who knew, after all the crap that they had gone through, that Michael would be standing next to Brady on the day of his little girl’s funeral? Brady’s family members were also present, but it was nice to see that his buddies and Jane’s girls had their backs.
Not many words were said, because what could they really say? Their daughter was taken away from them too soon, before she could breathe one breath…there wasn’t much to say.
“Please take a rose to place on the casket and say your goodbyes,” Albert said, as he brought forward a basket of red and pink roses. Red because of love and pink because Brady always envisioned his daughter in pink, the way she was meant to be seen. She was going to be a daddy’s girl in pink clothes, tiaras and ballerina costumes, waving a wand at him as she danced on her tippy toes. The vision he conjured up in his mind time and time again completely gutted him as he watched his parents say their goodbyes first.
Next, Marc and Patty walked up, grabbed a rose and placed it on the casket. “You are truly a gift,” Marc said as he walked by.
Lucy walked up behind them and, sobbing, grabbed a rose and leaned down to the casket and silently said something to their girl. Brady couldn’t quite make out what she said, but he knew it had to do with the baby she was currently carrying, because when she spoke to their girl, she rubbed her stomach.
Parker and his date walked up, repeated the process and then turned around to squeeze Brady’s shoulder. He nodded his head as they walked by. Other family members walked by and paid their respects. It wasn’t until Molly walked up with Luke that Jane made any kind of motion to prove that, in fact, she was a human and had emotions.
Before grabbing a rose, Molly bent in front of Jane and grabbed her face with both hands. She took off Jane’s sunglasses and said in a strong, confident voice, “This baby, this beautiful baby girl that you and Brady created will forever be in our hearts and will never be forgotten. She was a stolen life, but one that blessed us all. You hear me?” Jane nodded her head as tears fell down her face. “Baby Girl Matthews is such a blessing to this world. You might not realize it right now, but she’s made an impact on all of our lives…more than you will ever know.” At that moment, Luke walked up behind Molly and placed a hand on her shoulder. Molly stood up, grabbed his hand and entwined their fingers together. “She is an angel that will forever watch over you, Jane, over all of us.” Molly leaned over and gave Jane a kiss on her cheek, “I love you.”
Jane nodded and mouthed back “I love you” to Molly as tears streamed down her face. Molly turned toward Brady and said, close to his ear, “This moment does not define who you two are as a couple, what will define you is how you move forward. Celebrate the little one that brought you such joy and get through this as a couple. Don’t let her pull away.” Brady nodded as Molly placed a kiss on his cheek. Luke stood in front of Brady and held out his hand. Brady took it and the look on Luke’s face spoke a thousand words. Luke and Molly were here together because his baby girl brought them here, she brought them together; Brady could see the gratefulness in Luke’s eyes. She really was an angel. Even though she was gone, she was making an impact on everyone’s lives.
After everyone said their goodbyes, they all walked away, giving Jane and Bra
dy their privacy. The only person who was left next to them was Albert, and he was there more for moral support than anything.
Brady knelt in front of his baby’s casket, not caring about getting dirty, and placed both hands on it. He leaned forward and kissed the cool surface, wishing he could feel his baby’s skin one more time. Because of how small their baby was and the fact that she wasn’t fully developed, they decided to have a closed casket, but what Brady wouldn’t give for just one more look, one more feel, one more touch of her.
Whispering softly between tears, Brady said, “You will always be Daddy’s girl. I love you so much, squirt.” Brady kissed the casket one last time and stood up. Jane stood still in place, watching over him, and right before Brady thought she might not move, she collapsed. Before she hit the ground, Brady was able to grab ahold of her and pull her to his chest. The emotion spilling out of her was a relief, because he hadn’t seen her cry since they’d left the hospital…she either yelled or walked around like nothing in the world could ever affect her.
With a little help from Albert, they brought Jane close to the casket and flanked her sides. Normally, Brady would be able to easily hold up his tiny wife, but the emotions rolling through his body from having to bury his daughter had left him weak.
She gripped the casket, making all the roses that were placed by family and friends either fall into the gravesite or get crushed between the casket and Jane’s chest. She launched into a fit of sobs as she held on for dear life.
“Come back to me,” she wailed, making Brady turn green. He knew his wife was in pain, but he didn’t know she was still in denial. “Please, baby girl, come back to Mommy.”
Every word that rolled off of Jane’s tongue was like a knife twisting into Brady’s gut. He couldn’t stand to see his wife like this, completely distraught.
The first day he ever saw Jane in Deuces, he knew he had come across a strong, confident woman. He fell in love with her so fast and their relationship was a whirlwind of emotions and minor speed bumps, but he never thought they would hit a brick wall like this. The way Jane was so reserved around him, the way she pushed away at his touch made him nervous, nervous for their future and what it might bring.
Albert was able to coax Jane away from the casket, as the graveyard workers lowered it into the ground. Slowly, so very slowly, Brady watched his little girl, a piece of his heart, be taken away from him as dirt started to be carefully placed in the small hole that was dug for their daughter. Normally, the workers waited for the family to leave before they started burying the casket, but Jane and Brady wouldn’t move. They refused to leave.
A hollow sound rang through the air as chunks of dirt hit the top of their little girl’s casket. As Brady stood there, he thought to himself how no parent should ever have go through such a tragedy. They should never have to live through the death of their child; it was a pain that no human should ever experience, no matter how terrible of a person they may be.
Once all the dirt was piled on top of their baby, Albert escorted them away from the gravesite and to the waiting black town car. There was a reception being held at the funeral home, but neither Jane nor himself wanted to go, so instead, Brady had the driver take them back to a very empty and very cold home.
**Lucy**
She didn’t know why she went to the reception. All she knew was, she wanted to be with people and if she went home, she was going to be alone. She hadn’t talked to Connor since he walked out of the Braves’ Christmas party. She missed him…terribly.
“I just got off the phone with Albert,” Patty said, as she put her phone in her clutch. Marc handed her drink back to her, the ever-considerate boyfriend. “Jane and Brady went back to the house. Albert said to not let the food go to waste and for us to clean up after everyone takes off.”
Even though Albert didn’t technically work at JB Events, he was still able to tell the girls what to do because he held high cards in the company where Jane was concerned.
“How can anyone even eat right now?” Lucy asked, as she held her stomach. “I feel so sick, I don’t think I could keep anything down.”
“It’s a natural reaction, not wanting to eat anything when there’s such sorrow in the air, but you have to eat something, Lucy.” Patty nodded toward Lucy’s stomach, indicating if she wasn’t hungry, then the baby sure was.
“Do you want me to fix you a plate so you can get off your feet?” Marc asked. He was always so sweet, Patty was one lucky girl. Patty looked up at him, beaming with pride at his thoughtful offer.
“Thanks, Marc, but I can take care of that for her,” came a voice from behind her.
She didn’t have to turn around to know who had just pressed his hand against her lower back, which was starting to get sore from carrying the extra weight in front.
“Uh, Marc, let’s go get some food,” Patty said, not so nonchalantly.
Once they were gone, Connor spun Lucy around and held onto her hips. Without saying a word, he leaned down and placed a soft kiss on her lips.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that alone. If I would have known sooner, I would have been with you.”
As she looked up at Connor, the gorgeous and way-too-understanding man, she knew she didn’t deserve him. He was way too good for her in so many ways, but at the moment, she didn’t care. She needed his warm touch.
“I’m glad you’re here now.” She snuggled into his chest and rubbed his back.
He leaned down and said into her ear, “We still have a lot of talking to do, but I just wanted to make sure you had someone for today.”
The way he said “today” worried her, as if he was doing her this one favor right now, but after today was over, they would be back to their separate houses. Fear started to tickle the back of her neck at the thought of Connor not wanting to be with her anymore. She was just about to ask him what he meant by “today” when Connor stiffened, but then leaned forward, offering his hand to someone.
“Wow, I haven’t seen you in a while. You look good, bro,” Connor said, as he shook who Lucy could only assume was Luke’s hand. The moment she saw Luke and Molly together at the funeral, she thought how damn jealous she was. Lucy’s relationship with a Cartwright man was the screwed up one, not Molly’s.
“Thanks, I’ve been patching up some holes in my life.”
Lucy turned away from Connor’s chest to see Molly wearing a skin-tight black dress, holding Luke’s hand and smiling politely at her. Lucy wanted to flick the girl in the forehead to see if she was possibly a mannequin. Molly never looked at Lucy like she was somewhat pleased to see her. Was Molly pitying her? Did she see that she and Connor were fighting? It would just be Molly’s style to rub her relationship in Lucy’s face while Lucy was trying to figure out if she still had a relationship with Connor.
“That’s good to hear, man. I’m pulling for you two.”
If they weren’t in public, at a funeral for a stillborn baby, Lucy would have stormed off at Connor’s comment. She hated that he helped Molly, hated it with a passion, and hated it even more that it seemed liked they were working things out.
What Connor failed to realize was what a massive bitch Molly was to her. She played with her heart, made her feel like total crap, meddled in her relationships, and had announced to the world that she was pregnant with Austin or Connor’s child, not to mention the bathroom “beat down” Molly gave her a couple of months ago. According to Lucy, the blonde was purely the spawn of the devil.
From the back room, a caterer dropped a tray of dishes, making a loud crash. They ignored it politely, not wanting to make a scene for the poor caterer.
“That means a lot to us, Connor,” Molly said, while gripping Luke’s arm, who all of a sudden seemed uncomfortable and almost distant. “You look nice,” Molly said to Lucy in a strangled voice, as if someone was forcing her to pay Lucy a compliment.
The feeling was mutual, Lucy thought.
“So do you,” Lucy lied. She hated Molly’s dress becau
se she looked like a damn super model in it, while Lucy looked like an obese hippo trying to squeeze into a too-small dress.
“I have to go,” Luke said quickly, as he tore his hand away from Molly’s and headed toward the men’s bathroom.
Molly started to walk toward him, but Connor stopped her and said, “I’ll take care of it.”
Molly nodded as Connor left her and Lucy to themselves. They both took one look at each other, smiled in a fake manner, and parted ways. There was no way Lucy was going to hang around and make ridiculous small talk with the spawn of Satan. Hell fucking no.
So instead, she walked over to the buffet of food and grabbed a plate for herself. She could at least stomach some berries for her baby as she waited for Connor to return.
Chapter Fifteen
**Connor**
Connor walked tentatively into the men’s room of the funeral home to find his brother sitting on the floor with his knees tucked into his chest and his head in his hands, breathing heavily. Connor thought back quickly to when Luke lost his shit a couple of minutes ago. His body went rigid when there was a loud crash of dishes, indicating the crash must have affected him.
When Luke came back from his mission, Connor and his parents all went to see a doctor about PTSD and how to help combat the disease, but unfortunately, Luke had removed himself from their family, so they had no chance of helping him. Connor wasn’t going to let that happen now.
Thinking back to his conversations with the PTSD specialist, he remembered the doctor saying that sounds, sights, and even smells can bring a PTSD victim back to a dark time. Being aware that Luke might be re-living a moment from his capture, Connor walked slowly toward Luke and bent down so they would be eye-level if Luke was looking up.