“What are you doing?”
He froze. “I thought you wanted me to leave.”
She pushed him back down and kissed him. “No. I don’t want you to leave and I don’t think you’re a monster. Those people – what they did to you and your sister was horrible. You tried to protect yourself and your sister.”
“I slaughtered them, Nela. And I don’t regret it. I know that’s not normal.”
Nela shrugged. “I understand you. I probably would have done the same.”
Darko ran his hand over her hair and down her spine until it rested on her lower back. “No, you wouldn’t have. You’re good.”
Nela smiled wryly. If he knew how much she wanted to kill Grand Master Claudius, he wouldn’t say that. “I’m a necromancer. You said it yourself, it’s the darkest magic. If anyone has the ability to do bad things, then it’s me. And I’m not sure there’s much that’s stopping me from unleashing it.”
“You wouldn’t.”
“Who knows? I don’t know what would happen if I had to watch my mother burn at the stake. I don’t think I would react different than you did. If you’re a monster, then so am I. But you’re not. The true monsters are the members of the Brotherhood who condemn us, who think they’re so much better than we are. They fill people’s head with fear and hatred.”
Darko wrapped his arms so tightly around Nela, it almost hurt, but she didn’t mind. She could tell he needed her closeness, and so did she. The last few weeks had been hell and she knew the future wouldn’t be any easier.
“I don’t deserve you,” he murmured. She shook her head against his chest, suddenly tired. Tomorrow she’d have to face her own power, raise the dead and learn to control them but for now she just wanted to find peace in Darko’s arms.
Chapter 28
A knock tore Nela from sleep. She startled up, disorientated for a moment. Someone groaned beside her. She rubbed her eyes and found Darko lying beside her, his face buried in the pillow and black hair all over the place.
Another knock. “Nela?” her father called. She jumped out of bed and rushed toward the door, opening it a small gap, so that only her head poked through. Her father stood in the hall, dressed in beige slacks and a white shirt as he did so often, but his expression was one he’d only added to his repertoire since Nela’s mother had been arrested. It was as if his skin was too tight for his face, like it might burst any second from tension.
“What’s up?”
“We need to talk. Can you please come down into the kitchen and have breakfast with me?”
Nela’s stomach tightened. She didn’t want to discuss her behavior. It would only lead to more fights.
“Please,” he said.
Nela paused. She couldn’t remember the last time her father had used that word with her. “Okay. Just give me a few minutes to take a quick shower and get dressed.”
It seemed as if her father wanted to drag her down right away but then he nodded and disappeared down the hall. Nela listened to his steps retreating down the staircase before she closed the door. Darko sat up in bed, running his hands over his face. “Sorry. I fell asleep. That never happens to me.”
“Sometimes you have to sleep too.”
“Yeah,” he said, then yawned. He got out of bed and stretched. His shirt rode up, revealing a sliver of pale, toned stomach. “But I usually don’t fall asleep when I’m not home.”
Nela grabbed a few clean clothes. “I have to get ready and talk to my father. Will you be there when I come back?” She hovered in the doorway.
“Sure. There’s nowhere else I need to be. I don’t suppose I could come down with you and have breakfast?” An amused look danced in his eyes.
Nela snorted. “That would certainly spice up my conversation with my father.” She slipped out of the door but before she closed it, she said. “I’ll try to sneak some food up for you.”
Fifteen minutes later she was showered and dressed, and rushed down the staircase. She’d hurried to make sure her dad didn’t lose his patience and came upstairs to investigate what was taking her so long. He’d throw a fit if he found Darko in her room. Maybe he’d even alert the authorities, and with Darko’s past that wouldn’t go over well.
Her father was already sitting at the table, staring down at a half-empty cup of coffee. There was already a light white film on the black liquid as if it had been sitting in the cup for a while.
She grabbed a fresh cup of coffee for herself and took the seat across from him. “You wanted to talk to me?” She tried to remain calm and controlled, to give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe for once he’d come up with a plan to save her mother.
He lifted his gaze from his coffee. His eyes travelled over her face as if he was trying to look behind her mask. He wouldn’t succeed. They’d drifted too far apart. He didn’t know the first thing about her anymore.
“Did you get a notice with the date of Mom’s…you know?”
“Yes, it’s in exactly two weeks.”
Two weeks? That was much quicker than Nela had thought.
“I know you’re angry at the Brotherhood for sentencing your mother to…to death.” A flicker of emotion passed his face before it slipped away and left the mask she’d come to know in the last few weeks.
“You think?” Angry wasn’t even beginning to cover how she felt. “What about you? Aren’t you angry? Or don’t you care about Mom at all?”
“Of course I care about your mother,” he said, still in that infuriatingly calm voice. “But the Brotherhood acted according to their laws. If you see the situation from their standpoint – ”
“I don’t want to see it from their standpoint! They’re in the wrong! How can you be so calm about this?”
“I’m trying to be reasonable. Anger won’t solve the situation.”
“You know who I’m really angry at? You. Because you just sit here, doing nothing while Mom is going to get murdered. You are a coward.”
He reached for her hand but she pulled back and rested it in her lap, far away from his reach. “You have to trust me, Nela. I’m only doing what’s best for us.”
“How am I supposed to trust you? You act like one of them, like you don’t care if they burn Mom.”
“I do care. But I’m an adult and I have to act like one,” he said tightly. For the first time he showed a hint of anger.
“So you think acting like an adult includes letting Mom die?” Heat rose into her eyes, but she fought if back. She’d promised herself not to cry, especially not in front of her father.
His jaw tensed. “You’re not the only one who loves your mother, but she wouldn’t want us to risk our own lives for her. She knew what she was doing when she broke the law. She knew the consequences.”
“So Mom prefers to die? That’s what you think?”
His palm hit the tabletop. “That’s not what I said.”
“But you might as well have. Do whatever you want, but I won’t watch Mom die. I will stop the staking from happening.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You don’t know what you’re talking about. I know the last few months have been difficult for you. They were for me too. But you can’t go around talking like that. It’ll get you in trouble. The Brotherhood will take you seriously.”
“That’s okay. Because I am serious. I won’t let anything happen to Mom. I’d do anything to stop them from killing her.”
“You’re being childish. You can’t even practice magic. There’s nothing you can do to them. This isn’t a fairytale, Nela.”
“If it were, at least we’d know who the villain is,” she said spitefully. The tendons in her father’s neck strained. She almost wanted him to lose his temper. “And you don’t know who I am anymore. I can stop them and I will.”
She rose from her chair but her father did the same, barring the doorway. “What are you talking about?”
Nela could feel her anger ignite her magic, could feel it sizzling in her fingertips. “I can do magic. Where do you think I a
lways run off to? And you know what else? I’m a necromancer and if necessary I will raise the dead to save Mom.” He didn’t need to know that she wasn’t even sure if she could control a bunch of dogs. She’d find out tonight.
Her father looked as if she’d slapped him. He gripped her arms tightly. Terror flashed in his eyes. Maybe she shouldn’t have let the truth slip out. What if he tried to stop her? “No! You’re lying,” he whispered harshly.
“I’m not. I’m a necromancer like Mom’s brother.”
A tremor went through his body. Nela tried to shake his grip off but his hands tightened. “You won’t do anything. Nobody must find out about it. I won’t allow it.”
“Let me go!”
“Nela, don’t you realize how dangerous your abilities are? You will get yourself and your mother killed. I’ll lock you up to stop you if I have to.”
‘Let me go!’ her mind screamed and her magic burst out of her. Her father stumbled backward, colliding with the table. The coffee cups tumbled to the ground and smashed into bits and pieces, spilling their black content everywhere. He stared at her with shock-widened eyes. Elation rushed through her like a warm breeze. She’d actually managed to push him away with magic. They stared at each other, neither of them moving. She could hear church bells ringing in the distance, announcing that it was 10 am. He straightened slowly, determination on his face. She backed away, then turned and ran up to her room. Her heart pounded when she slammed the door shut and locked it, pressing herself against the smooth surface.
“Nela, stop! You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into!”
Without magic it would take her father a while to get in.
“Nela?” Darko asked. He got up from her desk chair, caution radiating off of him. He looked like a predator ready to pounce. “Is something wrong?”
“Who is that in the room with you?” her father shouted, wiggling the door handle.
“Can I live with you?”
“Don’t do anything stupid!” Her father threw himself against the door. It shook in its angles.
“What’s going on?” Darko asked as he knelt on the ground to paint a new pentagram on the wooden floor.
“I told him that I’m a necromancer.”
Darko straightened, disbelief plain on his face. Was he angry with her? “Why?”
“I don’t know. I was angry. I wanted to hurt him.” The door shook again. Nela really hoped the Brotherhood guard outside wouldn’t notice the commotion.
“You didn’t tell him about our plan, right?”
“Of course not,” Nela said as she joined Darko in the pentagram. “I only told him that I wanted to save my mother…”
“Nela,” Darko said in exasperation, then he wrapped his arms around her. Their surroundings became blurry as Darko drew the shadows in. They pressed against them until Nela felt like she was caught up in a black snowstorm.
The door flung inward, her father stumbling into the room. His wide eyes landed on them but before he could get his balance and head for them, Nela felt the ground being ripped away from below her feet as the shadows lifted her into their realm. Her father disappeared from view, his mouth opened in a scream. His words followed her into the darkness. “Your uncle lost his mind! He almost killed us all. Don’t— ”
Nela and Darko landed in his apartment, but Nela’s mind was still far away, with her father and his words. He’d looked truly terrified.
***
A yellow plastic windmill spun in the gentle breeze, its arms emitting a clacking sound as they moved. Darko climbed over the shoulder-high metal fence. Nela handed him the backpack and the flashlight before she too crossed the barrier and touched the grassy ground of the pet cemetery. A signal collar lay on one of the tiny gravestones and gave off its bright pink neon light. The gravestones here were smaller than on Melaten cemetery, but Nela was still surprised to see how much people were willing to do for their dead pets. Darko let the beam of the flashlight travel over the surrounding graves. Many of them had small candles, flowers and even pictures on them.
“That one looks big,” Darko said, the beam frozen on a photo of a black dog. Nela approached the grave hesitantly, looking around for a sign of someone watching them, but nobody was around. The only thing that could give them away was their flashlight, the only source of light besides the few candles, but Nela doubted anyone would bother to hire a guard for a pet cemetery.
She bent over the photo in its oval, red frame. The dog inside looked like a Rottweiler. Definitely big. “Maybe we should start with something smaller.”
She didn’t look at Darko, unwilling to admit that she was scared of losing control of a dog that size.
He cast the beam to another grave where a Westhighland terrier called Roy was buried. “What about that one?”
Nela nodded until she realized that Darko couldn’t see her. “Okay.”
They approached the grave. The photo of Roy was attached to the tiny round gravestone.
“Marble. Wow, people really dig deep into their pockets for their pets,” Darko said. He unzipped the backpack and took out two shovels. Beside the photo, the birth and death date were engraved into the marble. “It died four months ago. Don’t you think that’s too long ago?”
“I’m not sure if there are any fresher carcasses that fit our requirements around here. Let’s give it a try and then we’ll see.” He held out the shovel and she took it gingerly. Darko removed the candle and carefully set aside the two flower plants. He leaned the flashlight against the gravestone before he jabbed the shovel into the soil. Nela stood beside him and stared at the lovingly kept grave, guilt filling her up. The owners of the dog wanted to give it a good resting place and she was going to ruin it, and not just that, she would drag him back to the world of the living.
“Won’t you help?” Darko asked as he unloaded his third heap of earth beside the stone. Nela braced her and started digging. Soon their shovels hit something hard. They scooped away the remaining soil, revealing a wooden coffin.
Darko snorted. “They even use coffins.”
“These people loved their dog, why shouldn’t they bury him properly if it makes them feel better?”
“They are probably the same people who don’t allow us to use crosses or angel figurines for our graves.” Nela knew he was right but it didn’t make her feel better. Darko tilted his head. “Are you okay?”
Nela wiped sweat off her brow with the back of her hand. “Yeah. But I feel as if it’s wrong what we’re doing here.”
“Of course it is, but we’re doing it for a reason. We want to save your mom. These animals are dead, they won’t care if we use them for a good cause.”
Nela doubted that very much, but she remained silent. Darko heaved the coffin out of the grave and set it down beside the hole. A heavy weight settled in Nela’s stomach. She could feel the draw to whatever was inside the coffin, and now that she thought about it, she suddenly felt more dead bodies calling out to her. It was as if dozens of tiny hands were tugging at her, trying to lure her toward them. She closed her eyes.
There were so many dead things around her. Fifty or more. Maybe if she focused long enough, she could figure out their exact number. She started reaching for each of them, one after the other. It was a blurry presence, no, more like an absence – like a black hole yearning to be filled with whatever was taken.
“Nela!” Darko shook her and she snapped back into the presence, sucking in a deep breath. She hadn’t even realized she’d stopped breathing.
A rustling came from the wooden casket to their feet, then it stopped.
“What did you do?” Darko asked. “When you had your eyes closed, something strange was going on. The air changed, as if it was charged with static.”
“I don’t know,” Nela admitted quietly, her eyes frozen on the coffin.
“Try to focus on the dog this time, okay?”
Was Darko nervous? His face didn’t give anything away, but his voice had betrayed him. “Okay
,” she said as she knelt beside the coffin and put her hands on it. The wood was cold and dank, and earth stuck to her palms.
“Don’t you think it would help if we opened the lid?”
“No!” She swallowed. “Let me try it like this first.” She pleaded him with her eyes, and eventually he shrugged and settled on the ground beside her. She tried to ignore the draw from all around her, the silent begging, and stared at the smooth wood of the coffin. A soft tug came from inside and if she concentrated hard enough, she could feel a thread between herself and the carcass. In her mind she imagined wrapping her hands around the thread as if she was taking the dead dog on a leash. She imagined tugging on it, drawing whatever called out to her back to the void that needed to be filled.