Robin nodded. “It’s beating so hard,” she whispered.
“That’s because I’m nervous.”
“Nervous? About what?”
Cole slid a hand into his pocket and brought out a small black velvet box.
Robin’s heart started to pound in double time. “Cole?” she said anxiously, not sure what she should think or how she should act.
“I love you, Robin.” His voice was hoarse. “I knew it the moment I heard your voice when I called from Seattle. And every moment since has convinced me how right this is.” He opened the box and revealed the largest diamond Robin had ever seen. Slowly he raised his eyes to hers. “I’m asking you to be my wife.”
Nine
“You mean this whole evening … you arranged this whole evening because you intended to ask me to marry you?” Robin asked, pressing the tips of her fingers to her trembling lips. Despite her fears a gentle gladness suffused her heart.
“Surely it isn’t that much of a surprise?” he said. “I’ve never made an effort to hide how I feel about you or how much I enjoy Jeff.”
Contrary to what Cole might think, his proposal did come as a surprise. “I … I don’t know what to say.”
“A simple yes would suit me,” Cole urged warmly.
“But … Oh, Cole, it would be so easy to marry you, so easy to join my life and Jeff’s to yours and never look back. But I don’t know if it would be right for us or for you. There’s so much to consider, so many factors to weigh, in a decision this important. I’d like nothing better than to just say yes, but I can’t.”
“Are you asking for time?” Cole’s eyes seemed to penetrate hers, even in the dark.
“Please.” For now, that seemed the simplest thing to say, although her hesitation was based on something much deeper. Cole had rediscovered a peace within himself since meeting her and Jeff; he’d told her so that very afternoon. She was tempted to say yes, to turn away from her doubts and agree to marry him. Cole had been so good for Jeff, so wonderful to her.
“I hate to disappoint you,” she murmured sadly.
“I know exactly what you’re thinking, exactly how you’re feeling.”
“You do?” Somehow she doubted it. But knowing she couldn’t delay it any longer, she jumped in with both feet. “I was … just thinking about what you told me this afternoon. How you’d recently dealt with the loss of Jennifer and Bobby. While you were talking, I couldn’t help feeling your exhilaration. You’ve obviously found a newborn sense of freedom. I think the question you need to ask yourself is if this rebirth you’ve experienced is what prompted the idea of marrying again.”
“No,” he said flatly. “Falling in love with you did.”
“Oh, Cole,” she whispered. “It must seem like fate to have Jeff and me move in next door, and it gets more complicated with Jeff being the same age as Bobby ….”
“Maybe it does all appear too convenient, but if I was just looking for a woman and a child, then Heather Lawrence would’ve filled the bill. It’s you I fell in love with.”
“But how can you be so sure?” she countered quickly. “We barely know each other.”
Cole smiled at her doubts. “The first time we kissed was enough to convince me I was going to love you. It was the Friday night after I returned from Seattle, remember?”
Robin nodded, wincing a little.
“I was so stunned by the effect that kiss had on me, I avoided you for an entire week afterward. If you want the truth, I was terrified. You’ll have to remember, up until that time I was convinced I was incapable of ever falling in love again. One kiss, and I felt jolted to the core. You hit me hard, Robin, and I needed time to step back and analyze what was happening. That’s the reason I don’t have any qualms about giving you however long you need to sort out what you’re feeling. I want you to be very sure.”
Robin released a pent-up sigh. Cole folded her in his arms and his chin brushed against her hair while his hands roved in wide circles across her back. The action was soothing and gentle. She was beginning to feel more confident in his love, but she had to be careful. She wanted him to love her, because she was so much in love with him.
Cole tucked a finger under her chin and lifted her face to his. As their eyes met, he slanted his mouth over hers in a wildly possessive kiss, a kiss filled with undisguised need.
When he broke away, Robin was trembling. She buried her face in his neck and drew several deep breaths.
“If you’re going to take some time to think about things,” Cole whispered against her hair, “then I wanted to give you something else to think about.”
“Have you had a chance to check those figures on—” Angela began, then stopped abruptly, waving her hand in front of Robin’s face.
“A chance to check what figures?” Robin asked, making a determined effort to focus. She knew she’d been acting like a sleepwalker most of the morning, but she couldn’t stop thinking about Cole’s proposal.
“What’s with you today?” Angela demanded. “Every time I look over here, I find you staring into space with this perplexed expression on your face.”
“I was … just thinking,” Robin muttered.
“About what?”
“Nothing.”
“Come on, girl, you know better than that. You can’t fool me.” Angela leaned against the edge of Robin’s desk and crossed her arms, taking her usual aggressive stance. “I’ve known you far too long. From everything you haven’t said, I’d guess your handsome neighbor’s involved. What’s he done now?”
“Cole? What makes you ask anything so ridiculous?”
Angela frowned, shaking her head. Then she stretched out her hands and made a come-hither motion. “Tell Mama everything,” she intoned. “You might as well get it over with and tell me now, because you know that sooner or later I’m going to drag it out of you. What kind of friend would I be if I didn’t extract your deepest darkest secrets?”
“He took me to dinner,” Robin admitted, knowing that Angela was right. Sooner or later, she’d wheedle it out of her.
“Where’d he take you?”
She shrugged, wanting to keep that to herself. “It was outside the city.”
“Where outside the city?” Angela pressed.
“Heavens, I don’t know. Somewhere along the coast on Highway 101.”
Angela uncrossed her arms and started pacing. “It wasn’t the Cliffhouse, was it?”
“I … I think it might have been,” Robin murmured, concentrating on the task in front of her. The one she should’ve finished hours earlier. The one she couldn’t seem to focus on, even now.
“Aha!” Angela cried, pointing her index finger at the ceiling, like a detective in a comic spoof.
“What?” Robin cried.
“If Cole took you to the Cliffhouse, he did it for a reason.”
“Of course he did. The food was fabulous. By the way, you were right about Frank, he’s exceptionally nice,” Robin said in an effort to interrupt her friend’s line of thought.
“You already told me what you think of Frank, remember?” Angela said. “Cole took you to dinner at the Cliffhouse,” she repeated slowly, as though reviewing a vital clue in a murder mystery.
“To be honest, I think his choice of restaurant had something to do with Frank,” Robin inserted, tossing her sleuth friend a red herring.
“So Cole was jealous?”
“Not exactly,” Robin said, leaning back in her chair. “Well, maybe a little,” she amended, knowing Angela would never believe her if she denied it completely. “I mean, Cole did invite me to dinner as soon as he learned I was dining with Frank, so I guess you could say he was a little jealous. But not much. Cole’s not the jealous type—he told me that himself.”
“I see.” Angela was frowning as she walked back to her desk. Her look remained thoughtful for the rest of the morning, although she didn’t question Robin again. But when they left for lunch, she showed a renewed interest in the subject of Cole.
/> “How’s Jeff?” she began as they stood in line in the employees cafeteria.
“Fine,” Robin said as she reached for a plastic tray.
“That’s all you’re going to say?”
“What more do you want to know?”
“I ask about Jeff once a week or so, then sit back and listen for the next fifteen minutes while you tell me about the latest craziness,” Angela said heatedly. “It never fails. You’ve told me about him running away with a frying pan and an atlas. You’ve bragged about what a fabulous pitcher he’s turning out to be, and you’ve given me a multitude of details about every game he’s played. After you tell me all about his athletic ability, you generally mention how good he is with animals and all the tricks he’s taught Blackie in the past week.”
Robin tried to respond but Angela ignored her and kept talking. “Today I innocently ask how Jeff is, and what do I get? Fine. All right, Robin, tell me what happened with Cole Camden before I go crazy trying to figure it out.”
“It’s something I need to figure out myself,” Robin said. She paused to study the salads before selecting a mound of cottage cheese and setting it on her tray.
“What are you doing now?” Angela cried, throwing her arms in the air. “You hate cottage cheese. You never eat it unless you’re upset and looking for ways to punish yourself.” She took the small bowl from Robin’s tray and replaced it with a fresh fruit salad, shaking her head the entire time.
The problem with Angela was that she knew Robin all too well.
They progressed a little farther down the line. Robin stood in front of the entrées, but before she chose one, she glanced at her friend. “You want to pick one of these for me, too?” she asked dryly.
“Yes, I do, before you end up requesting liver and onions.”
Angela picked the lasagne, thick with melted cheese and spicy tomato sauce. “If you’re looking for ways to punish yourself, girl, there are tastier methods.”
Despite her thoughtful mood, Robin smiled.
Once they’d paid for their lunches, Angela led her to a window table that offered a certain amount of privacy. Robin busied herself arranging her dishes and set the tray aside.
Angela sat directly across from her, elbows braced on either side of her lunch. “Are you sure there isn’t anything else you’d care to tell me?”
“About what?”
“About you and Cole, of course. I can’t remember the last time I saw you like this. It’s as if … as if you’re trapped in some kind of maze and can’t find your way out.”
The description was so apt that Robin felt a tingling sensation along her spine. She did feel hopelessly lost. Her mind was cluttered, her emotions confused. She had one foot in the present, one in the past, and didn’t know which way to turn.
“I talked to Frank on Sunday afternoon,” Angela continued, dipping her fork into a crisp green salad. “He said he enjoyed the evening you spent with him, but doubted you’d be seeing each other again because it’s obvious to him that you’re in love with Cole Camden. In fact, Frank said you talked about little else the entire evening.”
“He said all that?”
Angela nodded. “He’s right, isn’t he? You are in love with Cole, aren’t you?”
“I … I don’t know.”
“What do you mean you don’t know?” Angela persisted. “It’s written all over you. You’ve got that glazed look and you walk around in a trance, practically bumping into walls.”
“You make it sound like I need an ambulance.”
“Or a doctor,” Angela whispered, leaning across the table. “Or maybe a lawyer … That’s it!” she said loudly enough to attract the attention of several people at nearby tables. “Cole took you to bed, and now you’re so confused you don’t know what to do. I told you I’d stumble on the answer sooner or later.” Her eyes flashed triumphantly.
“That’s not it,” Robin declared, half rising from the table. She could feel the color crowding into her cheeks as she glanced around the cafeteria. When she sat back down, she covered her face with both hands. “If you must know, Cole asked me to marry him.”
A moment of shocked silence followed before Angela shrieked with pure delight. “That’s fabulous! Wonderful! Good grief, what’s wrong with you? You should be in seventh heaven. It isn’t every day a handsome, wealthy, wonderful man proposes to you. I hope you leapt at the chance.” She hesitated, suddenly still. “Robin? You did tell him you’d marry him, didn’t you?”
Robin swallowed and shook her head. “No. I asked him for some time to think about things.”
“Think about things?” Angela squealed. “What’s there to think about? He’s rich. He’s handsome. He’s in love with you and crazy about Jeff. What more could you possibly want?”
Tears brimmed in Robin’s eyes as she looked up to meet her friend’s avid gaze. “I’m afraid he’s more in love with the idea of having a family than he is with me.”
“Is Cole coming?” Jeff asked, working the stiffness out of his baseball mitt by slamming his fist into the middle of it several times.
“I don’t know,” Robin said, glancing at their neighbor’s house as they walked to the car. “I haven’t talked to him in the last few days.”
“You’re not mad at him, are you?”
“Of course not,” Robin said, sliding into the driver’s seat of her compact. “We’ve both been busy.”
Jeff fingered the bill of his baseball cap, then set the cap on his head. “I saw him yesterday and told him about the game, and he said he might come. I hope he does.”
Secretly Robin hoped Cole would be there, too. Over the past five days, she’d missed talking to him. She hadn’t come to any decision, but he hadn’t pressed her to make one, willing to offer her all the time she needed. Robin hadn’t realized how accustomed she’d grown to his presence. How much she needed to see him and talk to him. Exchange smiles and glances. Touch him …
When she was married to Lenny, they were two people very much in love, two people who’d linked their lives to form one whole. But Lenny had been taken from her, and for a long time afterward Robin had felt only half alive.
All week she’d swayed back and forth over Cole’s proposal, wondering if she should ignore her doubts. Wondering if she could ignore them. Sleepless nights hadn’t yielded the answer. Neither had long solitary walks in Balboa Park while Jeff practiced with his baseball team.
“Cole said—” Jeff started to say, then stopped abruptly as his hands flew to his head. A panicky look broke out on his face and he stared at Robin.
“What’s wrong? Did you forget something?”
“My lucky hat!” Jeff cried. “It’s on my dresser. We have to go back.”
“For a baseball cap?” Robin didn’t disguise how silly she considered that idea. “You’re wearing a baseball cap. What’s wrong with that one?”
“It won’t work. You have to understand, Mom, it’s my lucky hat. I’ve been wearing it ever since we played our first game. I had that very same hat on when I hit my first two home runs. I can’t play without it,” he explained frantically. “We have to go back. Hurry, or we’ll be late for the game. Turn here,” he insisted, pointing at the closest intersection.
“Jeff,” she said, trying to reason with her son. “It isn’t the hat that makes you play well.”
“I knew you were going to say something like that,” he muttered, “and even if it’s true, I want to be on the safe side, just in case. We’ve got to go back and get that hat!”
Knowing it would only waste valuable time to argue, Robin did as he requested. After all, his whole career as a major-league pitcher hung in the balance!
She was smiling as she entered her driveway. Sitting in the car while Jeff ran inside for his lucky cap, Robin glanced over at Cole’s place. His car was gone. It’d been gone since early that morning, and she suspected he was at the property, working on his house. Jeff would be disappointed about Cole missing his game, but he’d understand.
/>
Jeff came barreling out of the house, slamming the front door. He leapt into the car and fastened his seat belt. “Come on, Mom,” he said anxiously, “let’s get this show on the road.” As if she’d caused the delay, Robin thought to herself, amused by her son’s sudden impatience.
By the time they arrived at Balboa Park, the car park was filled to overflowing. Robin was fortunate enough to find a space on the street, a minor miracle in itself. Perhaps there was something to this magic-cap business after all.
Jeff ran across the grass, hurrying toward his teammates, leaving Robin to fend for herself, which was fine. He had his precious cap and was content.
The bleachers were crowded with parents. Robin found a seat close to the top and had just settled in place when she saw Cole making his way toward her. Her heart did an immediate flip-flop and it wasn’t until he sat next to her that she was able to speak.
“I thought you were working up on the property this weekend.”
“And miss seeing Jeff pitch? Wild horses couldn’t have kept me away.” He was smiling at her with that cocky heart-stopping smile of his.
“How have you been?” she asked. She couldn’t keep her eyes off him. He looked too good to be true, and his dark gaze was filled with warmth and tenderness. How could she help getting lost in eyes that generous? It seemed impossible to resist him any longer.
“I’ve missed you like crazy,” he whispered, and the humor seemed to drain out of him as his eyes searched hers. “I didn’t think it was possible to feel this alone. Not anymore.”
“I’ve missed you, too.”
He seemed to relax once she’d said that. “Thank you,” he said quietly. “Have you been thinking about what I said last weekend?”
She bowed her head. “I haven’t thought of anything else.”