I rest my good hand on his cheek and he threads his hands through my hair, holding my face in his large hands, then he slips his tongue past the seam of my lips and touches mine. Sharp feelings of need—and want—flow through me as he deepens the kiss.
I move my hands down to his waist and slowly pull him with me as I walk backwards into my bedroom. When we're inside, he locks his eyes onto mine, searching.
"Are you sure? There's no rush, Love," he comforts.
I close the door and turn the lock. "I'm sure."
He just keeps staring at me and I let out a laugh.
"What?"
One side of his mouth tips up. "I've waited for this moment and I'm afraid I'm going to fuck it up by hurting you."
My heart warms. "Then let me help you." I slip the jacket off, dropping it to the floor as I toe off my shoes.
Sebastian doesn't move an inch. He just watches and I wonder if he's even breathing.
I manage to get my shirt off and my leggings and socks, but the bra is a bit tricky. Alexa's been helping me get dressed.
"Let me," he offers, moving close, his arms going around me, both hands unhooking my bra, but he doesn't make an attempt to remove it. He leans down and kisses my neck before whispering in my ear, "Be sure, Livvy."
"I am," I whisper back, lowering my arms, letting the bra fall to the floor. I'm standing there in front of this man who's more than my best friend—he's my rock—in a flimsy pair of cotton panties. Leave it to me to have my granny panties on when Bash and I get naked for the first time. I sigh, closing my eyes as my face heats up.
"Hey," he coaxes. I open my eyes. "What is it?"
I smile pitifully. "I'm in my comfy undies and there is nothing sexy about them—at all. I wish I could be sexy for you."
His breath catches. "Livvy, God. You're the sexiest woman alive." I snort in disbelief. He takes my hand and puts it on his erection then lifts a brow. "Still don't believe me?"
"I believe you," I whisper, stunned by the intensity of his need.
He takes off his jacket and it falls to the floor behind him. His shoes are next. He reaches down with one hand and pulls his shirt over his head. How guys do that I'll never know, but it's sexy as hell and I hope he never stops.
He's tattooed all over: his chest, arms, neck, and back. Later I'll study them and see what they're about, but right now he's unbuttoning his jeans and pulling them down. Holy hell. He steps out of them, pulls off his socks, and stands there in front of me in only a pair of tight boxer briefs that outline his cock really, really well.
I squeeze my thighs together, wanting so much to feel him inside me, thrusting and bringing me pleasure.
"Livvy," he says and I look up. "You gotta stop looking at me like that."
"Like what?" I ask.
"Like you want to eat me for lunch."
"Maybe I do," I admit, feeling no shame or embarrassment telling him that—which surprises me. Being bold always made me self-conscious. That doesn't seem to be the case with Bash.
He reaches out and pulls my panties down, then his boxers before reaching out for me, wrapping me in his arms and kissing me with so much passion I squirm in his arms. My ribs hurt—all my bruises hurt, but I don't care.
He lifts me and carries me to the bed where he flings the blankets and sheet back before laying me down. He doesn't break the kiss through it all, just slides in next to me, making sure not to rest his weight on me.
"You're so god damn beautiful," he whispers, kissing down my chest before taking my nipple into his mouth, rolling his tongue around the hard point.
I let out a moan.
"You like that?" he asks.
"Mmm, it feels so good."
"This'll feel better," he tells me, sliding his hand down between my legs and circling my opening with his middle finger.
My breath catches and so does his.
"Damn, Livvy. You're so wet for me," he murmurs, slipping his finger into me, slowly, too slowly.
"Sebastian," I cry, pulling on his arm.
"More?" he asks.
"Yes, more!" I cry out and he thrusts his finger in and out of me harder, adding a second. "Ohmigod!"
"So damn beautiful," he murmurs. "I want to see what you look like when you come."
I reach for his hand, stopping him. "No," I breathe.
"No?" Our gazes lock.
"I don't want to come like that. I want to come with you inside me," I declare. "I want that for our first time."
He rests his forehead against mine for a second, then two, before kissing my lips and reaching for his pants.
I hear the crinkle of the foil wrapper and watch as he rolls the condom on. He turns over to lie on his back and urges me up. I slowly climb over him, straddling his hips.
"I don't want to hurt you so you get to be on top," he tells me, his eyes glazed with desire, want, need.
"Lucky me," I tease.
He holds his cock, slipping the head through my wetness, then positioning himself at my opening.
No words pass between us. We just hold each other's gaze and watch each other as I sink down onto his cock. I moan when the tip is in, then louder as I lift and lower myself, working him deeper.
He lets out a groan when I lean forward a bit, taking him inside at a different angle.
"Livvy, you feel incredible." His hands rest on my hips, not rushing, not slowing me down, just letting me set the pace.
When he's fully seated inside me, I pause.
"Sebastian…" I whisper.
He swallows and nods. "I know."
"This changes everything. There's no going back," I tell him, admitting my fears.
"Baby, there was no going back the minute you told me you're in love with me. I won't let you go," he informs me.
"I don't want you to."
"The move, Livvy. Let me feel you," he says softly as he runs two fingers down my cheek.
I lift and lower myself, his hard cock filling me, his eyes holding me as tightly as his hands hold my hips as I give myself to him. It's not just physical, but emotional. I feel so many things as we make love and all of them are good.
When I feel the orgasm creeping up on me, he knows. How, I don't know, he just does, and he urges me to move faster.
"Livvy, I'm on the edge. Come with me," he murmurs.
I grind hard on the downstroke, my clit hitting just right. "Oh yes," I cry out getting closer and closer, all but vibrating as the pleasure builds.
"Jesus," Bash mutters. "You're going to come so hard. I can feel it."
He cups my breasts, gently squeezing then thumbing my nipples.
Then I'm there, my breath catches, my vision blurs, my entire body stiffens as overwhelming sensations of bliss roll through me. My toes curl, my nails dig into his chest, and then he lifts his hips with a shout, coming with me, never looking away, giving me everything he is and taking everything I am at the same time. It's scary. It's unfamiliar. It's bliss.
I slowly lean forward, collapsing on top of him, sweaty and panting and deliciously spent.
"This makes it a done deal," he breathes into my hair.
"What's that?" I ask, looking up at him.
"You're mine forever."
I grin. "Don't you forget it."
fourteen
I hang up the phone and look at Bash.
"My mom wants us to come home for spring break."
"My mom wants us to go to Brooklyn this weekend," he tells me, making me smile.
"I'd love to go!" I tell him. I'm so excited to finally be whole and healed enough to meet his family.
He pulls me into his arms. "I wish you'd let me take you sooner. They wouldn't have cared about the bruises."
"The cast is bad enough."
He gives me a look. "My mom's been nagging me every day for the past six weeks."
I look at him. "Six weeks, huh?" I hadn't broken things off with Cam at that point.
&
nbsp; He grins. "Yep. I mentioned you at the beginning of the semester, but I knew about six weeks ago I had a shot."
"Pretty sure of yourself, aren't you, Elevator Boy?"
He chuckles. "I know you, Three. You fell for me the day you met me—you just weren't ready to admit this tattooed bad boy could give you real thing then."
"How did you know—" I break off, wondering how he could possibly know what I thought of him when I met him. Manwhore. Tattooed bad boy.
"Love, I could read you like a book. You just needed some time."
"Hmm," I tease. "I think you might be right."
He beams down at me. "Of course I am. I know my girl."
He leans down to kiss me, and I wrap my arms around his neck, deepening the kiss further than he expected. He lets out a groan of pleasure and I nip at his bottom lip.
"I love you, Sebastian Smith."
"I love you too, Olivia Brennan."
"Thanks for waiting for me," I say sincerely.
"I'd have waited a lifetime—but I'm glad I didn't have to," he admits.
Our kiss is heating up, hands are roaming, our breath turning to pants when Bash's phone rings. He pulls back, cursing.
"I have to get it. My mom wants to make the plans for the weekend," he tells me and I just smile, hugging into his side.
"Smith," he answers, without looking. Immediately his body gets stiff and tense. "When? I'll try but I can't guarantee it. All right."
He hangs up and backs me up to sit in the chair. He hunkers down in front of me.
"What's wrong? I ask, my stomach plummeting.
"Nothing's wrong, but I need to ask you and Alexa to go somewhere with me that you're not going to want to go," he tells me, the dread sinking deeper.
"Lex!" I call out and she walks over.
"What's going on?" she asks cautiously.
My lover looks so uncertain. I don't like it. I want to comfort and soothe him just as he does me.
"Bash needs to take us somewhere," I tell her.
"Where?" she asks.
"I don't know. It doesn't matter, let's just get our boots and jackets on," I tell her. She gives me a look like "what the hell is going on" and I just shrug. We'll find out soon enough.
When we arrive at the frat house, I want to turn and run in the other direction—but then I remember, nothing here can hurt me anymore—my past can't hurt me anymore.
There are three police cars and campus security all over the place.
"What is going on here?" Alexa murmurs.
I just shake my head.
Cam steps out the door, talking to a police officer, and I cringe. When he sees us standing there, he smiles cautiously. He nods to the cop one last time and heads over toward us.
"Ugh," I mutter and Bash tightens his arm around me.
"It'll be all right. I promise."
With those words, I relax. I trust him like I've never trusted anyone before—completely and without hesitation. Alexa cocks out a hip and rests her hand on it.
"Thanks for coming," Cam begins.
"What do you want?" Lex hisses.
"I wanted to let you know that Alison was just arrested for paying someone to attack you, Liv," Cam says and my breath backs up into my lungs. I lean against Bash for support and try to breathe.
Bash pushes my head down between my legs. "Breathe, Livvy. Slow and easy. That's my girl. Breathe," he coaxes. My eyes flip up to Cam who watches us with worry, caution, remorse, but most of all confidence. I realize in this moment, he's never going to be anyone but this Cam.
I slowly stand up, my breathing under control.
"How?" I ask, unable to think of anything else to say.
Cam shrugs. "I basically used her. Got close to her and last night when she'd had a little too much to drink, I mentioned you when we were in my room. I had everything set up to record her and she didn't disappoint."
"Oh my God," I breathe, my hand flying to my chest.
"She told me about the guy she paid to attack you. Smith, dude, it's a good thing you went looking for her because Ali told the guy the only restriction was that Liv was still breathing," Cam tells us.
"I can't even imagine what she wanted him to do," I say with more anger than disbelief because, honestly, Alison has no conscience.
Cam looks uneasy. "I don't know but she wanted you hurt really bad. She said this was just a taste of what she wanted to happen."
"She was going to make this happen again?" Bash asks, his anger palpable.
Cam nods. "Yeah. She's been watching but you're always with Liv so she hasn't had the chance."
"She was going to do it herself?" I ask.
"That's what it sounded like," Cam answers.
"I wish she'd tried. I can take her—well, if I didn't have this cast. The hell with that—I'd still have kicked her narcissistic ass," I growl.
"Whoa, tiger," Bash says with a chuckle. "Now you don't have to and that's a good thing. You'd feel guilty afterward."
"It'd feel good," I admit.
Bash shakes his head. "Only at first, but once you thought about it, no matter what she's done to you, you're not the type to be okay with hurting someone like that."
"Oh, I don't know. I'd feel pretty good about hitting Cam in the head with a baseball bat," I admit.
"What? Why?" Cam asks with disbelief.
"You're such an idiot, Cameron Stone," I scoff.
"Uh…" he mutters.
"Thanks for what you did—with Alison and the guy who attacked me. I sincerely appreciate that, more than you can know," I begin.
"But?" Cam leads.
"Don't misunderstand—I don't want to get back together—but I find it interesting that while we were together you didn't have five minutes to visit me or, some days, even time for a phone call, but for the last two weeks—from what I've been told—you've been making time to snuggle up to Alison, fuck her, get her to trust you. That takes time and effort, neither of which you made for me," I tell him straight up.
He has the decency to look down in shame. He should. When he lifts his head and looks at me, that shame is gone. What I see is the same Cameron Stone I've always seen—the cocky son of a bitch who doesn't give a shit about anyone's feelings but his own.
"I guess it was time to bully Alison instead of me, huh? Just with different tactics," I bite out.
He shrugs. "Guess so."
Alexa scoffs in disgust, walking away and over to where Raven is standing with Candace.
Cam doesn't say anything else and he's really not worth any more of my words.
"Thanks again, seriously. I wish you the best of luck with your career—but we both know you're going to make it big. I just hope one day you'll allow yourself to truly love someone other than yourself," I tell him. His jaw ticks, he's pissed, but I don't care. It's how I feel and I'm not afraid of him anymore. Those days are gone. Washed away with the rain.
"Oh," I say before Bash and I leave. I point over to the lawn. "Your umbrella's over there. I won't be needing it anymore." I look at Bash. "Turns out I love the rain."
Sebastian squeezes my hand and we walk away.
"Where are you taking me?" I ask when we go in a direction I've never been.
He smiles, that one that makes my heart skip a beat, the one that had my breath catching the first time I saw it.
"Exploring," is all he says. "The sun is shining and tomorrow they've predicted snow."
"It really is a gorgeous day, but what if we get lost?" I question as we follow a path into the woods.
He stops and turns me toward him, leaning down to kiss my lips softly.
It's taken me awhile to find her—but I've found the me I want to be, and having Bash walk this path with me—literally and figuratively—is everything I've ever dreamed of, no matter where it leads.
When he pulls back, I smile and he smiles back.
"We won't get lost. Livvy baby, don't you know? I'll always k
now the way when I'm with you."
epilogue
Six Months Later…
I don't know what the exact charges were or how much time she got, I just know Alison got charged with a felony and she's in jail… or prison? Whatever. It doesn't matter. Let's see how much bullying she gets done in there.
Apparently, they had the girls from Boston come forth and testify as well. Alison is so screwed. And the guy she hired? He's a third-strike offender so he's in for life. Idiot.
Does it make me sad? Hell no. Does it make me feel safer? Very much so. I can finally stop looking over my shoulder—well, maybe some day when it sinks in.
"Your mom's looking for you," Bash says as he walks up behind me.
I roll my eyes and flop back on the soft blanket. "She's always looking for me."
He lays down next to me.
"She said to tell you lunch was ready. She made the chicken salad that's your favorite," he murmurs as the sun shines down on us, hot and bright.
I curl my toes in the sand. "That's almost reason enough for me to get up. I'm so relaxed, babe, I just don't want to move. It's the first time in I can't remember how long that I'm not constantly afraid to be alone."
He reaches over and threads his fingers through mine, twisting the ring on my left hand. No—it's not an engagement ring. It's an I-love-you-and-I-promise-I-will-forever-and-this-is-the-ring-before-you-get-the-big-one ring. To me, it means just as much. I think it does to him too.
"I gotta tell you, Livvy. Seeing you out here by yourself, eyes closed, totally relaxed? Well, it made me smile. I love you so much and when you're happy, I'm happy," he tells me.
I roll over on top of him and our skin touches. I'm in a bikini and him in just board shorts.
I press my lips to his and kiss him chastely, but one taste of Bash is never enough. Our tongues duel and play and when I pull back, I look down at him with a smile.
"You should know, babe, that you make me happy. Happier than I've ever been."
He smiles back. "Good. Wanna go eat before your mom starts pouting?"
I snicker. "She's got you so wrapped around her finger."
He nods. "She does and I'm not ashamed of that at all." His hand trails up my back and over my shoulder. "What'd they say about your tattoo?"