“Well, he’s looking for work, but we’re all in one house together. Will lost his apartment when he went away.”
She said it like her son had been studying abroad. “Does Logan have his own room?”
She frowned. “You call him Logan?”
“Yeah. It was confusing having two Shane’s so we started using his middle name.”
She nodded. Her finger brushed over the collar of Logan’s lame bear shirt. “Logan,” she said, testing the name. Logan turned at the sound of his name and babbled.
Where was Will? Maybe he didn’t want to see Shane.
“He really is good for you,” she said.
Shane grinned. The compliment felt great. He nibbled Logan’s cheek and made him laugh. Logan grabbed his nose, digging his fingers into Shane’s nostrils—secret handshake.
They sat talking and watching Logan for the next hour. When he fussed Shane gave him the bottle Will’s mother had brought. Logan was getting really good at holding the bottle himself. Soon he’d be moving onto solids like Cheerios and biscuits. He was sad he wouldn’t be there for those firsts. He’d looked forward to them.
When their time was up Will’s mother stood. He reluctantly stood as well. Pain slowly eased into his chest, tightening and forming a knot there. It was time to say goodbye again.
“Would you like to see him tomorrow?”
“What? I thought…” That wasn’t what the court had ordered.
She shrugged. “Logan’s happy when he sees you. I see no reason for you not to see him.”
“Sure. I’d love to.”
She smiled. “Same time then?”
“That works.” Shane suddenly felt lighter “Um, what’s your name?”
“Nadine.”
“Thank you, Nadine.”
“Thank you, Shane, and you’re welcome.”
He helped her load Logan back in the stroller and watched as they walked away. Logan’s cries tore at his heart something fierce. Shane only survived the difficult moment because he knew he’d be seeing him again in less than twenty-four hours. One day at a time, that’s what Kate had said, one day at a time.
* * * *
Shane met Nadine at the park every day that week. On Saturday she actually dropped him off at the trailer for the day. She was an older woman, in her late fifties. She looked tired, but Shane didn’t know if that was just how she always looked.
That Saturday, Kate came over and they played on the floor with Logan like old times. Nadine came to pick him up just before his bedtime. It was hard to say goodbye, as always, but knowing he’d be seeing him again soon helped.
Shane never saw Will, which started to annoy him. “But where the hell is he?” he asked Kate one night in bed. “I feel like Nadine’s acting like his mother more than he’s acting like a father.”
“I don’t know,” she answered honestly. “I’ll see Stephanie tomorrow and I can ask her, but you know I can’t break confidentiality.”
He rolled over so he was leaning slightly on her chest. “You would tell me though, if something was wrong I mean.”
She kissed him. “Shane, I was Logan’s advocate for three months. You know I would step in if I saw something that wasn’t right.”
He turned and rested on his back. He was beginning to like Nadine. She was good to Logan, doted over him the way a grandmother should. Shane was grateful Logan had someone in his life like that.
On Monday he got a call from the woman at the unemployment office. “Mr. Martin?”
“Yes?”
“This is Merriam Costel from the Labor and Industry office. We have an opening for a labor position in Tobin County you may be interested in.”
He muted the TV and grabbed a piece of paper. “I’m listening.”
“It’s a maintenance position working for Lakota Township. The job’s going out to ten candidates who meet the requirements. The final selection will be made through a raffle. If you’re interested you’ll have to be at the township building Thursday morning for an interview.”
“Okay.” He got the address from her and jotted it down.
“Mr. Martin, this is a very rare opening. The pay’s substantially more than what you were making for the union because it’s salary. You may want to collect some letters of recommendation to bring with you for the interview.”
He wrote down letters of recommendation and put five exclamation points after it. “What’s the starting salary?”
“The position starts at sixty-five thousand a year and tops out around eighty.”
He stilled. Sixty-five thousand. His brain went blank. That was like a thirty grand pay increase. His hand trembled and he swallowed nervously. “Is there anything else I should bring?”
“Just yourself. Good luck.”
He thanked her profusely and called Kate to tell her the news.
“That’s fantastic!” she said over the phone.
“It’s not a sure thing. I need to interview and then make it to the final list. From there it’s a raffle. Do you…do you think you could write me a recommendation?”
“Of course. Whatever you need.”
When he got off the phone with Kate he called Bruce, his last general foreman. It was difficult explaining that he might be leaving the union. That was frowned upon in a big way, but Bruce had a family and he was aware of Shane’s situation over the last few months. He agreed to write him a letter, but asked Shane to keep that between him and the people he was interviewing with.
After he visited with Logan that afternoon he went to the bank. He had eighty-four dollars to his name, but his bills were paid. He withdrew forty and went to the Salvation Army store. There he found a nice white polo shirt and a decent pair of dress jeans for under twenty bucks.
He gassed up the Kia and drove to the strip mall outside of Sunny Acres. As he waited in his car he took a deep breath. This was it. He gripped the steering wheel and decided this opportunity totally justified his decision.
He pulled his keys from the ignition and locked the car. When he entered the establishment, a woman in a black apron greeted him. She walked him back to a chair and he sat down nervously. They went over what he wanted.
“Ready?” she asked.
He met her gaze in the mirror and took a deep breath. “Ready.”
The sheers sliced through his ponytail and he shook his head, hair tumbling around his ears. No going back now.
She proceeded to snip away at his hair until he barely recognized himself. The length of his ponytail was being donated to Locks of Love to make wigs for children undergoing chemo.
When he left he had four dollars in his pocket. His ears were cold and he felt like a different person. He stopped by a convenience store on his way to Kate’s and spent his last four dollars on a red rose.
Rather than simply walking in when he arrived at Kate’s, he knocked. She opened the door and was wearing a dusty sage cardigan and brown dress pants. She looked like a centerfold for fall.
He held out the rose and her eyes bulged.
“Oh my God, your hair!”
“Do you like it?” he asked nervously.
She jerked him through the door and yanked his head down so she could run her fingers through it. “It looks amazing. I can’t believe you cut it all off.”
“But you like it?”
She met his gaze, her soft brown eyes burning as they stared into his. “It’s incredibly sexy.”
He held out the rose. “I got this for you.”
She blushed a delicate shade of pink and took the rose. Then she kissed him.
His arms wrapped around her and he pulled her close. She must have really liked his haircut, because she started taking off his clothes right there in the doorway.
Shane peeled off her cardigan and tossed it on the floor and she shucked her pants. He scooped her up and her legs went around him. Leaning her against the door, he ravished her mouth. Her fingers burrowed in his short hair as she ground her body against his.
Her fingers made quick work of undoing his zipper. She gripped him and he slid her panties aside. “Put me inside of you,” he growled against her mouth.
She lined their bodies up and Shane drew back, snapping his hips forward and filling her to the hilt. Kate’s head tipped against the door as he withdrew and thrust into her, hard.
Muscles burned as breath and blood and lust pumped through him. His body pounded into hers so hard the small brass knocker on the other side of the door rattled with each cock of his hips. Kate was a maniac. She scraped her nails over his shoulders. If he hadn’t been wearing a shirt she’d probably have drawn blood.
He loved her. God, he loved her.
They came together and he remained inside of her as he carried her to the couch. Collapsing, he held her to him. When he caught his breath, he laughed and said, “I should bring you flowers more often.”
She giggled. “I decided on doing that to you before you even got here, but yes, flowers are nice.”
After dinner she handed him three envelopes. “What’s this?” he asked.
“Open them.”
He opened the first envelope and withdrew a slip of paper.
To Whom It May Concern,
I became acquainted with Shane Martin when I was assigned by the court to be his caseworker after he volunteered to act as guardian to his nephew after the death of his sister. I have never witnessed Shane on a job, but I did get a chance to witness him in his day-to-day life.
Shane is a man who takes responsibility very seriously. If he is expected to do something, it becomes a top priority. He is honest in all things. He is prompt, dependable, and possesses great people skills.
While I cannot vouch for his abilities as a township laborer, I can assure you that he is a person I hold in high regard and believe capable of many things. According to Shane, he is a simple man, but in the short time I’ve known him I’ve come to the decision that extraordinary is a better word for the type of man he is.
Please accept this letter of recommendation on his behalf. While Shane would benefit greatly from this opportunity, I also believe the township would be acquiring an employee who would prove to be a great asset.
Sincerely,
Ms. Katherine McAlister
Licensed Social Worker
Children and Youth
Advocate and Liaison for the Department of Welfare
He looked at her as she waited anxiously for his reaction. “Wow, Kate.” He shook the letter. “That’s twice you’ve gone to bat for me on paper. Thank you. This is incredible.”
“I hope it helps.”
“Even if it’s never read by anyone but me, it helps. Thank you.” He kissed her. He held up the other two letters. “What are these?”
“Their from Joanne and Tabitha.”
“More recommendations?”
She nodded. “I told them what you were doing and they insisted on writing up something.”
“I didn’t know you talked to Joanne,” he said.
“We keep in touch. Tabitha called her and she faxed the letter right over.”
He shook his head, speechless. The other two letters were equally as praising but nothing meant as much as reading Kate’s commendation.
* * * *
Thursday morning he showered, shaved and changed into his new clothes. He cleaned up his work boots and stuck his recommendation letters in his pocket, including the one from his old foreman that arrived the day before. He was at the township building before it was even opened.
He interviewed with a man named Russ Myers. There were about forty guys there for the job, which was intimidating. Because there were so many applicants, the interviews were short and sweet.
Russ was a nice guy in his mid-forties. The applicants ranged from their early twenties to their late fifties. The job would be labor intensive and Shane was glad to see that he ranked among about ten percent of the guys applying when it came to a healthy physique.
He left feeling unsure. It was a crapshoot.
That afternoon when he visited with Logan he went to the Erickson house. Nadine invited him in, saying that now that the weather was getting cooler there was no reason to keep meeting at the park.
Logan lifted his arms to be held the moment he saw him. He recognized Shane’s voice, but curiously looked at his head as if trying to place what was different.
“You look nice today, Shane,” Nadine said as she placed a glass of iced tea on the table for him. “Got your hair cut.”
“Yeah. Thanks. I had an interview.”
“Oh, that’s wonderful. When will you know if you got the job?”
“Not for a while.”
Their house was nice. Simple. The furniture was clean, but dated. Old pictures hung along the wall behind the staircase leading to the second floor. Baby toys dotted the living room and dishes waited in a drying rack to be put away.
There were a lot of prescription bottles on the counter. He didn’t want to be nosy, but he noticed they all said Nadine. Will wasn’t home.
“Would you like to see Logan’s room?” she asked when Logan pooped and needed a change.
“Sure.”
He followed her down the hall. Their carpet was royal blue and didn’t really match the rest of the decor. But again, it was clean. The Erickson’s appeared to be normal people. As they passed more pictures sitting on a hutch in the hall, Nadine said, “This is Frank, my husband.” She ran an affectionate hand over the frame. “He passed away six years ago.”
Shane didn’t know what to say to that so he nodded and looked down.
Logan’s room was done in bears. He hid a smile. After being a ROCK STAR at his place, this baby bear motif had to be killing him. It was totally softening the badass image the little guy had been trying to cultivate.
When they walked back to the kitchen Shane noticed a bedroom with sports jerseys hanging on the wall. He knew it was Will’s.
After sitting and talking for a while Shane stood. “Do you mind if I use the bathroom.”
“Go right ahead,” Nadine said. “It’s down the hall on the left.”
Shane headed in that direction, but rather than go to the bathroom he returned to the room that had to be Will’s. The room was immaculate. The nightstand only held a lamp. The bed was made and the drawers of the dresser were all closed tightly. He frowned. Did anyone live there?
He pulled the door partially closed and went to the bathroom, flushing the toilet and washing his hands. Something was off. Although he didn’t want to see the guy who took Logan away from him, it was weird they never crossed paths.
That night, Shane couldn’t sleep. Kate was at her home, because he’d played at the Grill. He lay in his bed worrying. Worrying about his interview, worrying about Logan, worrying about Kate, worrying about what kind of father Will was, and worrying why Nadine had so much medicine on the counter.
She had dark circles under her eyes today. When he’d returned from the bathroom he saw her before she saw him and she looked run down and sad. Nadine did that a lot, frowned when she thought no one was looking.
He liked Logan’s grandmother. He wanted to do something nice for her. He didn’t know what kind of man Will was other than the absent kind, and being that she was a widow, he’d be willing to bet that the patched up cabinet in the bathroom had been waiting to be fixed for quite some time. He decided he’d fix it for her.
The next day when he knocked at the Erickson’s door he had his tools with him.
“What’s all that?” Nadine asked, holding Logan on her hip.
Shane was suddenly self-conscious. “I, uh, noticed your vanity in the bathroom was broken. I thought I’d fix it for you.”
She blinked at him and he frowned when he thought he saw tears shimmer in her eyes. “Oh, Shane…”
“If you don’t want me to—”
“Oh, no,” she quickly interrupted. “I’d really appreciate it. How about I set Logan up in his playpen in the hall so he can watch his daddy work and I’
ll make you something to eat?”
He frowned, but nodded. Did she realize what she said? His gut tightened uncomfortably. Was Will there? Was she referring to him? He took Logan as she got out the playpen. Once it was set up he went to work on the bathroom cabinet.
When he realized Will wasn’t there, he relaxed. Logan sat up babbling and clapping and drooling all over a teething ring as he worked. He was getting so big. Everyday Shane noted a difference.
The cabinet was a quick fix. When he was finished they ate chicken salad sandwiches. Shane was completely distracted by the fact that Logan was eating Cheerios. Cheerios! He was growing up so fast.
The front door suddenly opened and closed. Nadine noticeably tensed.
“Ma?” Will walked into the kitchen and stilled. “What’s he doing here?”
Shane stared at the other man. He had a drawstring bag slung over his shoulder. Nadine cleared her throat and said, “Will, you know Shane.”
“I thought visitation was only on Tuesdays and Saturdays?”
Shane noticed that Logan didn’t give a flying fuck about the guy’s presence. Nor did he greet Logan. What the hell was going on?
“Shane came by to fix the cabinet in the bathroom.”
Will eyed him. Shane was slightly embarrassed, but tried hard not to let it show. As he held Logan on his knee he stared back at the other man. Something wasn’t right.
“Oh, yeah, I’ve been meaning to get around to fixing that.”
Nadine stood and carried their dishes to the sink. She remained standing at the counter.
“Well, I’ll just put this in the laundry room.” Will said and walked away. A door in the hall closed. Was he sticking around?
There was a long, uncomfortable silence. Logan was getting cranky and probably needed to go in for a nap. “I should probably go,” Shane said.
Nadine took Logan and smiled. “Thank you for fixing my cabinet, Shane.” She squeezed his arm. “Come back any time.”
On the drive home Shane tried to make sense of the situation at the Erickson’s house. The more he thought about it the more pissed off he got. Will didn’t even say hello to Logan.