CHAPTER XXV
FIGHTING WITH SHADOWS
The morning came dark and stormy, with a September gale driving in fromthe Sound, and the trees lashing and tossing gustily through gray slantsof rain. It was so dark that until nearly noon we kept the lightsburning; and through the unnatural morning we sat about listlessly,unwilling to talk about the impending crisis and unable to talk long ofanything else for the unspoken weight of it upon our minds. Mrs. Taborkept her room, with Sheila and most of the time Lady busy with her. Sheseemed hardly to remember the night before, save as a vague shock; andphysically she was less weakened by it than might have been expected;but her mind wavered continually, and she confused with herhallucination of Miriam the identity of those about her. The rest of ustalked and read by snatches, and stared restlessly out of therain-flecked windows. Mr. Tabor and I began a game of chess.
It was well on in the afternoon when the automobile came in sight,swishing through the sodden grayness with curtains drawn and hood andrunning-gear splashed with clinging clots of clay. None of us knew whosaw it first; only that we three men were at the door togetherencouraging one another with our eyes. The medium greeted us with a gushof caressing politeness, glancing covertly among us as she removed herwraps, and bracing herself visibly beneath her unconcern. It was she whomade the first move, after Doctor Paulus had introduced us and we wereseated in Mr. Tabor's study behind closed doors.
"Mr. Crosby is the gentleman who turned the light on me last evening,"she said. I wish I could express the undulating rise and fall of herinflection. It was almost as if she sang the words. "Of course with himpresent I would not be willing to do anything. It was very painful,besides the risk, a dreadful shock like that."
"I shall not be in the room," I answered, "and I'm sorry to have causedyou any discomfort, Mrs. Mahl. We needed the light, I thought."
"Oh, it wasn't the pain;" she smiled with lifted eyes. "We grow so usedto it that we don't consider suffering. It was very dangerous, wakingone out of control suddenly. You might have killed me, but of course youweren't aware." She turned to Doctor Paulus: "You understand, Doctor,how it is, how it strains the vitality. The gentleman didn't realize."
We had become, at the outset, four strong men leagued against anappealing and helpless woman. Perhaps I should say three; for DoctorPaulus did not seem impressed.
"Yes, I know," he chirped. "We need not, however, consider that. You arehere, madam, as I have told you, for a scientific experiment under mydirection. Mr. Crosby will not be in the room. With your permission, Iwill now explain the nature of that experiment. There is in this house alady, a patient of mine, Mrs. Tabor, who has for some time frequentlysat with you. She has on these occasions habitually conversed, as shebelieves, with the spirit of her daughter Miriam that is some yearsdead."
"That is our greatest work." She was not looking at Doctor Paulus, butat the rest of us. "To be able to soften the great separation. Youothers hope for a reunion beyond the grave, but we ourselves know. Ifyou could only believe--if you could realize how wonderful it is to havecommunion with your--"
"We shall not go into that," said Doctor Paulus. "Mrs. Tabor, as I said,believes. She is therefore in a hysterical condition to which you havelargely helped to contribute. I do not say she is insane; she is not.But I do say she stands on the parting of the ways, and that, to saveher mind, or as it may be, her life, it is necessary that theseunhealthy conversations shall cease."
The medium looked now at Doctor Paulus. "The poor woman! Isn't itterrible? But you know, I can't believe, Doctor, that the sittings doanything but soothe and comfort her. It can't be that you think herinsane just because she believes in spiritualism? You believe too muchyourself for that."
Doctor Paulus looked at her steadily. "I have told you plainly that sheis not insane yet," he said.
"See here," snapped Reid. He had been shuffling his feet and fidgetingin his chair for some minutes. "No use discussing the ethics of yourbusiness with you. Let's come right down to the facts. We're not askingfor advice. We're stating a case. Plain fact is that Mrs. Tabor's goinginsane. You can stop it by showing her that these suppressed spirits area trick. Will you do it, or not? That's the whole question."
The medium had risen, and was looking for her handkerchief, eying Reidwith meek fearlessness. "Of course, I'm used to this," she murmured,"but not among educated people. A few centuries ago, Doctor, yourprofession was regarded in the same light. I don't imagine we can haveanything in common. Is the car still at the door?"
"Hold on, Walter," Mr. Tabor interrupted quietly. "Mrs. Mahl, you mustallow for our feelings in this matter. Please sit down again. Now, wemake no charges against you. The issue is not whether you are sincere inyour beliefs, nor whether we agree with them." He moved one hand in aslow, broad gesture. "All that we leave aside. The point is here: Mrs.Tabor's belief in these things is harmful and dangerous to her. And itmust be done away with, like any other harmful and dangerous thing. Wedon't ask whether it is illusion or fact; we ask you, for the sake ofher health, to make her believe that it is an illusion."
"You know, of course, that I have no control over the spirit voice,"said Mrs. Mahl blandly. "Do you wish me to refuse to sit for her?"
"Here and now, we wish to have you sit for her," Doctor Paulus put in,"and show her, once for all, how this her daughter's spirit is made. Itis to cure her of all credulousness in it, for with her mind clean ofsuch poison she shall recover."
"Would you have me lie to her even for her good?" The woman was either awonderful actress or a more wonderful self-deceiver. She turned to Mr.Tabor appealingly: "How can I deny my own faith? Do you think the truthcan ever be wrong?"
Mr. Tabor went suddenly purple: "If it is the truth," he growled, "it'sa truth out of hell, and we're going to fight it. But it isn't."
Not in the least disconcerted by her false move, she turned back toDoctor Paulus. "Doctor," she said, dropping her air of martyrdom andspeaking more incisively than I had yet heard her, "you are the one whoknows. These gentlemen do not understand. You know that there aremysteries here that your science can't explain, whatever you think aboutthem. You know the difference between my powers and the fakes of atwo-dollar clairvoyant. You know it in spite of yourself. Now tell mehow you can reconcile it with your conscience, to bring me up here tolisten to such a proposal as this?"
The alienist's Napoleonic face hardened, and his voice took a shrilleredge.
"We shall not go into that," he said. "And now we will make an end ofthis talking. You are partly sincere, but you are charlatan also. I haveseen all the records, and I have attended your sittings, and I have allthe data, you understand. And I have my position, so that people listento me. You have done tricks, once, twice, many times, and I have all thefacts and the dates. So. You will do as I say, and I will remember thatyou are part honest. Or, otherwise; if you will not, then I expose youaltogether, publicly."
"You can say anything you like," she retorted coolly. "I don't care abit. Just because you're a big doctor, you needn't think I care. Folksare so used to you scientific men denying everything, that when yousupport us it helps, and when you attack us it don't matter. You thinkyour little crowd of wise ones is the whole earth. My clients have faithin me. Go ahead, and expose all you want to."
"Wouldn't it be wiser to make friends of us?" Mr. Tabor asked slowly.
"We'll make you a by-word," sputtered Reid. "We'll run you out of thecountry. That's what we'll do, we'll run you out of the country."
She smiled: "All right, Doctor. Run along." Then rising to her feetagain, with a sweeping gesture, "Say what you will, all of you," shecried tragically, "I defy you!" And she marched over to the door.
"One moment, Mrs. Mahl," said I. "The man who was with me at yoursittings was a reporter, the only one there. If I say so, he'llscare-head you as a faker--in letters all across the front page. Youwon't be a serious impostor, or have the strength of a weak cause. Wewon't attack you and give you a chance to defend yourself, but we'llmake
a nationwide mock of you. You'll be a joke, with comic drawings."
"You're trying to bluff me," she sneered. Then all at once, her coolnessgave way, and she flung herself around upon us in a flood of tears:"You're a nice crowd of men, aren't you?" she sobbed, "to make a deadset on one woman this way!" She came swiftly up to me, and caught bothmy hands, leaning against me with upturned face. "Did you see anythingwrong at my sittings? Have you anything against me, that you'd swear to,yourself?"
"Not a thing," I answered. "What of that?"
"Then you'd _lie_ about me?" I could feel the hurry of her breathing.
"I would," said I, "with the greatest pleasure, in every paper in NewYork." I stepped back. "Excuse me, I'm going to telephone."
She looked around at the others with the eyes of a cornered cat. Thenshe dropped back into her chair.
"Very well," she sniffed, "I'll do it. I'll deny my faith to preserve myusefulness. And God will punish you."
The granite face of Doctor Immanuel Paulus relaxed into a grim smile.
"The press, in America," said he. "That is a fine weapon."
Mrs. Mahl, having finally yielded, was not long in recovering from heremotion; and while Mr. Tabor went to bring his wife, the two doctorsrapidly discussed the precise needs of the case, and with the medium'sassistance formulated a plan of action. I am bound to say that sheentered into the scheme as unreservedly as though it had been from thefirst her own; suggesting eagerly how this and that detail might best bemanaged, and showing a familiarity with Mrs. Tabor's trouble, and withnervous abnormality in general, hardly less complete and practical thantheirs. Presently we heard the voices of the others in the hall, and shewent quietly out to meet them. Then came a confused blur of tones, Mrs.Tabor's in timid protest and Sheila and Lady in reassurance; then Mr.Tabor, a little louder than the rest: "Not in the least, my dear. Whyshould I? You should have told me all about it from the first." Then thevoices grew quieter, and at last blunted into silence behind the heavycurtains of the living-room. We waited an interminable five minutesgazing into one another's rigid faces, and hearing only the restlessmovement of Reid. At last, Doctor Paulus nodded at us, and we tiptoednoiselessly across the hall to where around the edges of the close-drawncurtains we could hear and see.
At a little card-table, drawn out into the center of the floor, sat Mrs.Tabor and the medium, face to face. Between them and beyond the tablewas Mr. Tabor; Lady sat on her mother's nearer side, and Sheila, withher back to us, completed the circle. They were all leaning forwardintently, something in the attitude of people saying grace before ameal. The windows were not covered, but the dull light of the late andstormy afternoon came inward only as a leaden grayness, in which facesand the details of the surroundings were heavily and vaguely visible,like shadows of themselves. In the window at the far end of the room,the canary hopped carelessly about his cage, with an occasionalcricket-like chirp; and but for this the house was quiet enough for usto hear the swish of wind along the leaves of the vine-covered verandaand the ripple of the rain upon the glass.
I knew now that my excited sensations at the previous sittings must havebeen imaginary in their origin; for even here, in the presence of thisopen and prearranged imposture, I felt the same curious sense oftension, the same intimacy as of a surrounding crowd, the sameoppressive heaviness of the atmosphere. I could hardly believe in theairy spaciousness of the high room, or the physical distance between meand my fellow-watchers. My breath came laboriously, and I wondered howthose within could fail to hear the slow pounding of my heart and therustle of our heavy breathing behind the curtain. Out of the corner ofmy eye, I saw Reid raise his brows toward his superior, and he answeredby a frowning nod. At last after an interval doubtless far shorter thanbefore, but interminable to our strained anticipation, the mediumshuddered slightly, and fell back in her chair. Her face twistedconvulsively, and her hands and head made little twitching, aimlessmovements, unpleasantly like the reflexive spasms of a dying animal. Shemoaned softly once or twice, then relaxed limply; and the voice ofMiriam began to speak.
"Here I am--mother--why did--you--bring me here?"
Mr. Tabor leaned back, his white brows drawn into a savage knot. Sheilacovered her eyes and fell to rocking slowly to and fro. Lady made nosign; but I knew what sacrilege it was to her, and I could hardly holdmyself. Yet the mother answered without regarding them.
"I like to have you near me, dearest. Does this place trouble you?"
"Why should it--trouble me?-- As well--here--as anywhere-- Nothingmatters--to me."
"That's more like yourself than anything I've heard you say-- George,did you hear? Can you doubt now after that?"
Her husband answered only with a gesture, and the voice went on.
"Are you--sure you know me, mother?"
The two scientists exchanged glances. Mrs. Tabor began a hurriedprotest, but the voice interrupted.
"Because you may be--only imagining--it may not be real."
The querulous throaty tone was the same, but the words came each timemore quickly, and the wail was dying out of them. The comic aspect ofthe whole scene struck me suddenly with revolting. It was so terriblyimportant and at the same time such a tawdry practical joke.
"Miriam, what are you saying?" Mrs. Tabor was leaning forward toward thesound, her face tense and frightened.
"Oh, anything I please--it's quite easy-- Don't you begin tounderstand?"
"Oh, what do you mean? Miriam! Mrs. Mahl, what is happening?"
The medium never stirred, nor moved a muscle of her face, as thespirit-voice replied: "Just the same thing that's happened right along,Mrs. Tabor. Don't you see now? You were always so sure that any voicecould do for you to recognize. You've laid yourself open to it."
Mrs. Tabor looked for the first time as one might who listens to thedead. Her voice frightened me, it was so calm.
"What do you mean?" she said monotonously. I saw Reid move as if to partthe curtain, glancing sharply at Doctor Paulus as he did so; but theolder man's mouth was a bloodless line, and he shook his great head,whispering: "Not yet, Reid; not yet."
"Listen," said the voice. "Here's what you call Miriam talking." Itstone changed abruptly: "Now here's me. I'm doing it." The medium rosequietly from her chair, and stepped out into the room: "The wholething's just--a trick," she said, shifting from one voice to the otherin alternate phrases. "You believe in--ghosts--and so I gave you--whatyou believe." She came around the table. "Do you understand now?"
Sheila was sobbing aloud, but none of the others seemed to notice her.Mrs. Tabor sat for an instant as if frozen, staring vacantly in front ofher. Then as the medium approached, she shrank away suddenly with achildish cry of fear. "It isn't true!" she cried. "It isn't true!" andshe swung limply forward upon the little table, and lay still.
Lady and Mr. Tabor were beside her in an instant, as we three sprangforward into the room. Sheila was on her feet, muttering, "You've killedher, ye brute beasts--" But a look from Doctor Paulus silenced her, ashe waved the rest of us back and bent over the unconscious woman, hisbroad fingers pressed along the slender wrist. For a moment we watchedhis face in silence, as if it were the very face of destiny. Then thecanary gave a sudden shrill scream, and fluttered palpitating into acorner of its cage, beating so violently against the wires that tinyfeathers floated loosely out and down. The medium whispered: "Oh, myGod!" and cringed sidelong, raising her arms as if one struck at her.And my hair thrilled and my heart sickened and stopped, for even whileshe spoke, a voice came out of the empty air above our heads; a voicelike nothing that I had heard before, a woman's voice thin andtremulous, with a fragile resonance in it, as though it spoke into abell.
"Oh, mother, mother," it wailed. "Why don't you let me go and rest?"
CHAPTER XXVI
AND REDISCOVERING REALITIES
I think Lady clutched at my arm, but I can not remember. The one memorythat remains to me of that moment is the face of Doctor Paulus. Hiscolor had turned from ivory to chalk, his mouth was dra
wn open in asnarling square and his eyes shrank back hollowly, glaring intonothingness. For a second he stood so, clawing in front of him with hishands, a living horror. Then with an effort that shook him from head tofoot, the strong soul of the man commanded him. "It's nothing," hewhispered, "I understand it. Take hold of yourselves." The handsdropped, and he bent again over Mrs. Tabor. The next moment Sheila hadsprung out in front of us, and was speaking to the voice that we couldnot see.
"Miriam Reid," she cried, in a high chanting cadence between song andspeech, "if it's yourself that's here, lie down to your rest again, an'leave us. Go back to your place in purgatory, darling till the whiteangels come to carry ye higher in their own good time. In the name avGod an' Mary, in the name av the Blessed Saints, go back! Go back toyour home between hell an' Heaven, an' come no more among us here!"
"Get some water, Reid," snapped Doctor Paulus. "Quiet that woman, someof you."
But Sheila had done before we could move or speak to her. With her lastwords, she flung her arms wide apart, above her head, and brought theminward and downward in some strange formal gesture. Then as swiftly andcertainly as if she had planned it all from the beginning, she caught alittle bottle from her breast, and sprinkled its contents in theupturned face of Mrs. Tabor. We caught hold of her just as she wasmaking the sign of the Cross. But she was perfectly quiet now, withnothing more to say or do, and stood motionless like the rest of us,breathing deep breaths and watching.
The cool shock of the water did its work. Mrs. Tabor's eyelids quivered,and she gasped faintly. Reid came hurrying back with a glass of water,and stood at the side of his superior, looking foolishly disappointedas he realized the anticipation of his errand.
"She comes out of it all right," Doctor Paulus muttered. "No harm. It ismore the trance condition than an ordinary faint." He looked up atSheila with a grim smile. "Superstition is a fine thing--sometimes,under medical direction. Now I leave her to you, Reid, a few minutes. Itis better that at first she sees only her own." He beckoned to themedium, and the two went out of the room together. Then as we stoodabout, Mrs. Tabor caught another breath, and another. Her hands groped amoment, and her eyes opened. She looked around at us wonderingly, as weraised her up in her seat.
"Thank God," said Lady softly. And Sheila answered from the other side:"The Saints be praised."
She sat very quietly for a little time, looking about her. Lady hadwiped the water from her face, and she seemed her natural self again,the girlish color returning to her cheeks and a certain bird-likevivacity in her whole pose. Then, as if memory of a sudden returned toher, she crumpled over, hiding her tragic little face in her hands. Shebegan to cry softly at first in little sobbing, heart-broken gasps,which took on gradually a wailing intensity very dreadful to hear.
"Oh, my dear, my dear, my dear!" she repeated over and over again, in adesolate and ceaseless iteration that grew into a horror and which alonewe dared not stop. Doctor Paulus, we knew, must be within call andlistening. I think that all of us wondered why he did not return; weresented this permitted continuance of suffering. Finally it was Ladywho made the first move among us.
She dropped on her knees beside her mother, putting her arm tenderlyabout the convulsed little form, and pressing her cheek close againsther mother's own. "Mother, dear," she whispered very softly.
A pause came in Mrs. Tabor's sobbing and she stretched one hand half asif to push Lady away, half as if to hold her as something real andtangible.
"Where is the doctor?" she asked.
Evidently Doctor Paulus had been listening, for at the murmured questionhe stepped in and came across the room to Mrs. Tabor. She faced himshrinkingly, but nerved herself for the question.
"Why have you taken her from me?" she asked brokenly, at last.
Doctor Paulus' face was very kind and very serious.
"I know that now it seems so," he answered, "but all that will for youpass away. It is not that we have taken the daughter that is dead away.For you see now, and you will understand how all that came only out ofyourself, like a picture that you made of your own sorrow. It was in acircle, how you made by grieving this grief like a thing from outsidecoming to make you grieve the more. A circle that seems as well to beginat one point as at another, is it not so? And this cruel light sosuddenly has made you see the true beginning. So now it is all gonebecause you have known that it was never there at all." He moved hisbroad hands suddenly as one waving away smoke. "There is not any longerfor you that other world which never was, which was a burden and atrouble always to you because it was made out of trouble. But this goodworld you have again, and of that only the good part, all your dear oneshere truly returned because that evil nothing is gone from between. Isit not so?"
She had been facing him like a creature at bay, silent and resisting,the horror in her strained little by little into desperation as hespoke. I do not know what held us from interference, for the man wasblindly tottering on toward a precipice, clumsily ignorant of thecondition he must face; and every fatuous word grated like sand betweenthe teeth. One had a desire to lay physical hands upon him.
"Doctor," Reid broke out, "for God's sake--"
Doctor Paulus never turned his head. "Be still, young man," he saidquietly, and Reid's voice died into a stammer as he went steadily on.
"If it was cruel, this way to show you wholly the truth, so we must hurtonce not to have to hurt more. But it is better to have the truth now,is it not so? For you have all these that are living, and you will bewell again. Oh, there is no miracle; all does not in a moment change.Now and then still you will hear the voices and see these things whichare not. But you will know now that they are only of yourself, and sothey will go away. This we understand in the good old story of castingout devils. And it is good to be sure that the daughter is at rest, fromthe beginning. I want you to understand it all very clearly. You havebeen sick, but you are going to be well, not well all at once, remember,but better day by day, and when discouraging days come I want you toremember this: that even when things seem confused and unhappy andunreal, yet it does not make any difference. For you have your lovedones about you and they will help and when things are bad and you are alittle afraid, you can call for Doctor Paulus. I have never given myword falsely or for encouraging alone. Time and these loved ones willhelp, but most of all your own will will make your life what it shouldbe, will bring you back to happiness."
It is impossible to describe the convincing strength of the man as hestood towering among us; the very compellent force of his individualitywas reflected in the dawning belief in Mrs. Tabor's eyes. Like a childshe laid her little hand in the doctor's great one.
"I am going to try, Doctor," she said. "I see that I have been sick, butwith all you dear people I shall get well." And for the first time hereyes left the doctor's face and turned to the rest of us who had drawn alittle apart, but as they met mine their expression changed and aflicker of the old terror came into them, a terror that was reflected inmy own heart.
"George," she asked sharply, "what is Mr. Crosby doing here?"
"Why, my dear--" Mr. Tabor stammered.
"I know. I remember now." She struggled to her feet, and the old terrorwas upon her face. "I meant to tell you about it. Mr. Crosby has notbeen honest with us. I came into the room a while ago and found him withLady, and--" She broke off suddenly, looking quickly from one to anotherof our startled faces. "What is the matter with you all?" she cried;then in that level, hollow tone we had learned to fear. "I see now. Youknow--you have known all along; and that was the secret you were keepingfrom me."
No one spoke. She looked downward at her hands, then glanced again in apuzzled way from one to another of us. Mr. Tabor was the picture ofdespair, old and white and worn, his whole strength shaken by the visionof our final failure. Lady stood erect, her color coming and going,tragedy in her eyes; and near her Sheila, a gaunt and sturdy comfort,sure in the inherited wisdom of homely faith. And as I looked at thesetwo women, each in her own way upheld beyond h
er strength or herunderstanding, I made my resolve. I glanced at Doctor Paulus, but hemade no sign. If I must take the responsibility of an answer upon myselfI determined that at the worst I would leave no issue of the fightunknown; if we had failed, we must measure the whole depth of ourfailure.
"Mrs. Tabor," I said, "there is no secret any more. Lady is going tomarry me."
She gave me one look. "All that I had left," she whispered; and thenagain she began to cry, but this time softly, turning away from ustoward the window at the end of the room. Sheila followed and put an armabout her, and the two stood together apart from us under the fadinglight, while above their heads the canary burst out into a mockery ofsong. No one knew what to say or do; but after a little, Reid's itch forefficiency drove him into speech.
"It all comes right down to this, mother--" he began. A look from Ladydried the words upon his tongue, and the silence fell once more. Thenslowly and confidently Lady came over to me and slipped her dear handinto mine.
"You are right, Laurence," she said, "the truth is best for all of usnow."
"Mrs. Tabor," said Doctor Paulus, "you do not lose your daughter, butgain, I think, a very good son. Indeed it is Mr. Crosby who has helpedus much to our knowledge that you were going to be well and strongagain."
The calm strange voice broke in at just the precise instant to relievethe tension. Mrs. Tabor looked up.
"Oh, you need not be afraid, Doctor," she said, as she wiped away hertears, "but you do well to remind me. I know--I know there's nothingreally the matter with me except that I'm a little tired. And goodnessgracious, what are you good people standing there so stiff and solemnfor? It's all right! you've made me understand. Turn the lights on,Sheila--and-- Lady, what have you done with my ring?" She came across towhere we stood together, and took a hand of each in her own. She glancedover her shoulder at Paulus, "And you mustn't any of you think of goingaway this weather. The house is big enough to hold us--and, Mr. Crosby,I'm going to put you in Miriam's room."
THE END
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