They grabbed cocktails and found Jonathan immediately. Ethan noted the man lit up when he gazed at Mia and seemed genuinely happy to see him again. He pumped his hand with enthusiasm. "Mia, you look stunning. Ethan, so nice of you to join us. Chloe's missed you."
"I miss her. How is she doing at NYU?"
The man lifted his hands. "She's been giving it a fair shot, but I can tell she's unhappy. I've noticed a difference in her since she's been back. A new maturity. I think it was the summer she spent with you."
Ethan smiled. "Good to know. As I've said, I'd welcome her back anytime."
Lake's eyes took on a mischievous look as he glanced at Mia. "Ah, why do I feel like you'll be leaving the farm quite soon?"
A trickle of unease spilled through him. "What do you mean?"
"Well, I field more and more calls about my PR representative, so I think Mia's client base will soon explode. The two of you will do well here in Manhattan. Let me know if you need help finding an apartment; I have a few priceless contacts. Mia, can I just steal you away for a few moments?"
She looked over, and Ethan smiled. "Go ahead. I'll mingle."
He watched Mia drift into the dazzling crowd and headed toward the bar to find a quiet corner. As he sipped his second scotch, he surveyed the room, taking in the scene before him.
Already his nerves were tingling in warning. The heat pressed down on him, and he grit his teeth and held on. He could do this for the woman he loved. It was just an hour--maybe two, tops. This was her world, and she deserved to enjoy her time in the spotlight. When Lake got elected, everything would change for her. She'd be the hottest PR company in the city, and Lake was right. There was no way she could run a thriving business on an upstate horse farm. Eventually, something would break.
When she rejoined him, they worked the room. He hated every second of surface conversation and glossy images and the nonstop cycle of meet, greet, and move on. He despised the fake laughs, the roving gazes of certain men when they looked at Mia, and the assessing stares that tried to figure out if he was worth conversing with. When they finally left and headed back to her apartment, his fingers shook slightly, and he had to shove them in his pockets to hide it from her. And when he made love to her, over and over, a desperation leaked into every touch and kiss bestowed on her skin. Eventually a decision had to be made--a decision he didn't know if he could handle.
Mia's world no longer belonged to him. But the bigger question remained. Could he live in it? Could he force himself to move to the city and learn to function in a world he no longer fit in? And if he couldn't, would he be able to handle the possibility of losing her?
She stirred in his arms, interrupting his thoughts. "You're troubled."
He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I just came three times. I'm too stupidly happy to be troubled."
"Lie." Her fingers drifted over the crease in his brow. "I know it's been hard having a relationship long distance. But once Jonathan is elected, I can clear my schedule more. Spend time at the farm. We can trade weekends."
The niggling worry in his gut grew to a dull, spreading ache. It sounded logical, but the truth of what was going to happen needed to be faced. "Sweetheart, once Lake is elected, your client list is going to double. This is everything you've worked for. You may end up being even busier."
"So I'll hire more people." She propped herself on her elbow and tilted her chin up in that familiar stubborn way he loved so damn much. "I'll work at the farm and be careful about what type of clients I choose. This can work."
He smiled with a touch of sadness. "Your life is here, baby. And I'm so proud of you and what you've built. You shouldn't have to back off for anyone, especially me. But I can't help but keep wondering if I can be in this world any longer." He forced himself to say the words. "Something broke inside me, and being in the city brings it all back. I'm afraid I may not be able to give you what you need."
"All I need is you," she said fiercely. "Are you trying to tell me something, Ethan? Do you want to break up?"
He rolled over, pressing her deep into the mattress, pinning her wrists beside her head. "I love you, and I'm not giving up on us. But I need to face the truth with my limitations. I'm not going to be the man who holds you back and makes you regret what you could've done."
"The only thing I'd regret is not having you by my side."
He cursed under his breath. "You're so damn pigheaded."
"Then shut up and kiss me."
And he did. He pushed them both to the edge and over, her sweet cries echoing in the air as she shattered around him. Afterward, she slept in his arms. Ethan spent the night staring into the darkness until the sun broke free, wondering what the hell he was going to do.
Eventually, he'd have to make a choice.
And he didn't know if love would be enough for either of them.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Mia kept her gaze fixed to the giant television installed on the wall. The crowd shimmered with tension and mounting excitement.
The newscaster came on, and the tallies flashed on the screen.
Jonathan Lake had won the election.
With that final confirmation, a roar rose from the crowd, and all hell broke loose. Mia stood frozen in place, filled with a mixture of relief, joy, and fierce pride. They'd done it. Jonathan would now be the new mayor, and he was one of the good ones. A man who believed in the people rather than money, a man who'd fight for right and finally buck the system that leaked greed and avarice through its very foundation. It was the start of something good. Something she believed in and had fought for.
Finally, Mia had achieved justice for her father.
Her cell rang. She clicked the button, tucking it against her ear, and melted back away from the crowd. His gravelly, husky voice poured over the receiver.
"You won."
"We won."
"I'm so proud of you, baby. Not that I ever thought you wouldn't win."
Pleasure shivered over her body. Even with a simple phone call, every exchange was filled with intimacy and care that only grew stronger. Unfortunately, so was the frustration within her that wanted more. "I wish you were here. Chloe would love to see you."
"Me too. She already texted me a picture of the television screen showing her father as the winner."
She laughed. "You're kidding me. You were her first text?"
"One of them. I'm hoping she can squeeze a weekend to come see me and the horses during winter break."
"I'm already working on it." The phone hummed, but it was so much more than silence. It was a connection, a beautiful pause filled with emotion and intention that needed no words. Mia breathed it in, savoring every precious second. "Love you."
"Love you, too. Now, go enjoy what you worked so hard for."
She clicked off and smiled. Yes. It was time to enjoy the victory and let it be an evening to remember. She turned around, and Chloe parted from the crowd, moving forward, stopping right in front of her.
The girl looked beautiful in her simple black dress and heels. Her hair was still purple, but it was swept away from her face in a graceful upsweep. Her long neck and willowy body gave off an elegance she'd begun to grow into. The diamond winked in her nose, but she'd removed her other various piercings.
"He won," Chloe said, shaking her head. "My dad is the mayor of New York."
"Congratulations, sweetheart," Mia said, giving her a hug. "You supported him through this whole thing. I know it's been hard at NYU, but you did it, and now he won the election."
Chloe smiled with just a touch of sadness. "I'm proud of him. And I know right now Mom is throwing him the biggest political victory party in heaven."
Emotion squeezed Mia's throat. "Agreed. I just spoke with Ethan. He loved your text. Said he never doubted it a moment."
"Phoenix keeps getting stronger, and his race times are only decreasing. Oh, and Harper got a brand-new horse, and guess what she named her?"
"What?"
"Chloe's
Pride. She said she's a white filly who'll be perfect for me to ride when I visit."
"Oh, I can't wait to meet her. Did you hear Hei Hei has been officially grounded indoors? I didn't realize Polish chickens needed to be kept warm because of all those feathers. Ethan says he's pissed off all the time and pecks at anything he can get to."
"'Cause he misses you," Chloe said.
Their gazes met, and the memories of the farm they both loved settled over them.
"Just the women I was looking for!" Jonathan came up behind them, bringing them all into a fierce group hug. "My most valuable team in the world. You're the reason this happened."
Chloe hugged him back. "You did all the hard work. Congrats, Dad. I was just saying that Mom is probably throwing you a huge party in heaven."
Jonathan's face flickered with a sad longing. "It would've been the party of a lifetime, honey." His hand stroked his daughter's face. "Thank you. I know it's been hard these past few months, and work isn't going to get easier, but I love you. Without you, this means nothing."
"Thanks, Dad."
"Mia, you're a rock star. Get ready to be busier than you can imagine."
She tilted her head. "You think so?"
"You just helped me become the mayor. I already fielded three requests to sign up with your company. Your name is the hottest one in town as one of the best PR agencies in the business." He winked, linking his arm through his daughter's. "Better hire a few more people. You're gonna need it."
He walked away with Chloe. Mia stared after them, waiting for the rush of adrenaline and excitement to hit. Her dream of being a company celebrities and political clients sought out had finally come true. She'd accomplished everything she wanted in one perfect night.
If that's true, why did she feel so empty? Mia wondered.
Ethan.
He was pulling away. Oh, they still spoke every night and managed to squeeze in some brief visits, but ever since the night of the gala, something had changed. The last time he'd spent the weekend in her apartment, he'd been edgy, his limp more pronounced as he walked. Shadows danced in the eyes that had been so clear and bright on the farm. She'd done everything possible to craft the perfect weekend, but with the bumper-to-bumper traffic, massive crowds in Rockefeller Center, and packed lines at the trendy restaurants, he seemed to drift further away with each hour.
Panic curled in her gut. She couldn't lose him. She'd just have to try harder to get upstate more often and convince him it could work.
Her name was called from across the room. She pushed away her disturbing thoughts and concentrated on the party, determined to do anything possible to make them both happy.
Ethan stared at the phone. Her voice still echoed in his ear, the throaty, feminine drawl that brought instant heat to his body and hardened his dick in seconds. The ghost of her scent hung in the air from her last visit. He was so fucking proud of her. She'd followed her dream and gotten it. Score one for the good guys. He thought of her at the victory party, surrounded by crowds and champagne and excitement, the beginning of a successful career that demanded a big city, important clients, and endless work. But God, did she deserve this? The problem wasn't about her. It was about him.
Because he wasn't sure he could give her what she needed.
Ethan studied the phone in his hand for a long time, worried about the answer. The last weekend spent in the city had ripped him apart. By the time he drove back, his nerves were shredded, and his head thrummed painfully. It seemed to get worse every time he stepped into one of the greatest cities in the world--a city he loved and thrived in for many years before moving to Hollywood. Now, it was everything in his past. His future was right here, the place he'd fled so many years ago.
Fucking irony.
A knock sounded on the door. Wheezy stirred from his place at the fire, and Hei Hei gave an annoying shriek. "Come in," he called out.
Harper stepped in. Her blue T-shirts had been replaced with long sleeves, but the rest of the ensemble remained the same. She shook snow out of her hair and stomped her boots on the mat. "She won."
Ethan grinned with pride. "Hell yeah, she won. I never doubted it."
Harp moved into the kitchen, grabbed a beer from the refrigerator, and got comfortable in the battered leather armchair. "How come you're not partying with her?"
As usual, her directness hit its target. "Figured it'd be best to stay back. This is Lake's night and hers."
"Bullshit." She tipped her bottle back and took a slug. "You're having trouble being in the city. You're dealing with panic attacks and don't know if you can keep seeing Mia."
"Guess you know all the answers. So why don't you solve my problem?" he asked, irritation coursing through him. "I've realized we can't go on like this. I hate the fucking city. I hate that type of life. But it's Mia's life, and I love her, and I don't know if I can live without her, Harp. So solve that one for me, will you?"
His sister's green eyes flashed with empathy and an understanding that came from growing up side by side. "I wish I could," she said softly. "Can she move here?"
"Maybe. But I had my career and my time in the spotlight. She hasn't. How do I live with myself if she leaves a flourishing career behind and regrets it? I won't be that guy."
"Yep. You're fucked."
He stared at her. "Really? That's all you got?"
She shrugged. "I'm trying, okay? Ophelia is much better at this stuff. Look, she makes you happy, Ethan. But I think you need to reach deep and figure out if you can make this compromise. Can you find a way to not only function but also live in the city? Will it destroy you, or will being with her make the pain worth it?"
He shook his head and groaned. "I don't know. All I know is, when I'm with her I finally sleep. I laugh. I feel like I'm seen for the first time, all of it, all the messy shit you get used to hiding, but she doesn't care. In a way, I'm whole again. She makes everything . . . better."
His sister smiled and tipped her bottle in the air. "There you go. So you choose her."
He blinked. "It's not that easy. You need me here."
"I love having you here, but I can hire someone."
"I can't live in the city. You just said it--I have panic attacks around crowds, and I feel like I'm jumping out of my skin. I don't feel at home there."
"Do you feel home with Mia?"
He considered the question. "Yeah."
She smiled again. "There you go, dummy. There's the answer: Mia's your home. Oh, sure, it may suck for a while and be a huge challenge. You may need to go back into regular therapy to help with the attacks. Maybe compromise on a place to live where you get some space and limit your big social events. Come up here on regular weekends. Look into opportunities where you can help animals--you certainly have the background and education with Special Forces to do anything you want. There are endless possibilities. You can make it work, Ethan."
Emotion choked his throat. "How do you know?"
"Because, even though you don't believe it, you're extraordinary. Sometimes a real pain in the ass, but whatever you focus on, you conquer. Mom taught us that. It's in our blood, that love for home and all that shit. Mia's home for you. Get it?"
Yeah. He got it. His sister may not be as poetic as Ophelia, but she shot straight and true, which was exactly what he needed.
"Yeah. I get it."
"Good."
They drank their beer and watched the fire. Ethan took the time to accept his decision and plan. And finally, he realized his breath was clear, and that awful tightness in his chest was gone because his decision was right.
He was going after Mia.
Chapter Twenty-Eight Mia stared out the window. The snow dusted the pavement and covered cars. People rushed down the muddy street, huddled in coats, grumpy from the weather. With Christmas only a few weeks away, the city took a deep, collective, irritated breath and just held on. Constant crowds, traffic, bad tempers, and unrelenting social schedules overruled heart and stomped all over the Christmas s
pirit.
She placed her palm flat against the cool pane and wondered what Ethan was doing.
Thanksgiving loomed, and she was trying to carve out a few days to spend at the farm. She hadn't been able to see Ethan since election night over two weeks ago. They'd signed three big-name clients, and she'd spent the past weekend in crisis mode, trying to handle some big social appearances for a new boy band. She'd been to the hottest underground nightclub and hung out with some of the hottest boy bands in the business, then met with a potential up-and-coming senator who was as passionate as Jonathan about helping the working class. Gabby was working around the clock as they interviewed for additional staff. The company was growing so fast, her phone rang off the hook with clients begging for representation. She'd finally made the big time. Her dream had finally come true.
And Mia realized she wasn't happy.
She went through the motions of work, but her heart wasn't in it. The thrill she once had was gone. Instead, she had more fun on the phone with Fran and Brian and Tattoo Ted regarding their new marketing and social media strategies. They'd recommended her to a few more businesses, and though she had no time, she squeezed them in because they were her people. Who would've thought she'd spend more effort on recruiting crowds for a local comic convention than on the new client who wanted to play the role of Spider-Man in the brand-new television series?
Yeah. She was screwed up.
She just didn't know what to do about it.
Her entire life had revolved around building a company and securing justice for her father. Now, she was on the brink of greatness, and suddenly she was doubting her whole path. When had things so drastically changed? And could she give up everything she'd worked so hard for?