“Mama,” she repeated as I ignored the tightness in my chest and lowered her to the floor.
She took a few steps away from me and toward the woman.
My heart felt as if it were tearing in half. “Please, Baby Rose, come back to me. Stay with me. Don’t leave me.” I started to cry.
Her cute legs stumbled at first, but she found her way across the room.
I couldn’t take my eyes off my baby. It would be the last time I’d see her. I knew it. I’d had many dreams like this before, dreams where she’d been abducted and I’d found her, but never one where her adoptive mother faced me. It took every ounce of strength I had in me to make eye contact.
“Thank you,” the woman said with so much gratitude and happiness in her voice. “Thank you for giving me such a beautiful daughter.”
I hugged myself, watching Baby Rose run into the woman’s arms.
“You’re welcome,” I cried back in her direction. “I love you, Baby Rose. I’m so sorry. I hope one day you can forgive me and not hate me. Please, don’t hate me.”
Scratch.
“Please, don’t hate me,” I repeated.
An hour or so must’ve passed before I regained consciousness. At least it felt to be about that. I’d had a dream. Baby Rose. My girl.
Scratch. Scratch.
Opening my eyes, we were in the library, sitting in high-back chairs, which were thrown against each other.
Taddy and I were tied back-to-back. I could tell, because her long nails kept scratching at my arm. Lex usually bit hers and Blake’s were short. My wrists hurt from what was probably rope tied around them. My fingers are going numb. An unnatural stiffness took over my body.
“Vive, you awake?” someone muttered, sounding to be Taddy.
“Ah-huh. What happened?” My eyes watered as I stuttered out the words, “What’s going on?”
“Look at us,” Lex said in a jumpy tone, sitting tied to the chair on my left. She tried to kick her feet out. “Fuck. This is un-fucking-believable.”
“There’s no way we’re getting out of here.” Blake, who sat to my right, started to sob. “Look at Poppy.”
My neck strained as I jerked my head back in his direction. From my side view, I could only make out a sliver of Poppy. She was slouched in a chair between him and Taddy. Oh. No. “Is she…dead?” I couldn’t turn any further to tell if she was okay or not.
“I dunno.” Blake’s voice became more and more raspy as his body started to shake with tremors. “God. Please forgive me for all of my sins. I’m sorry for sleeping with Diego. The sex was just so good. Please, let homosexuals go to Heaven—”
“Blake. Morgan. Don’t talk like that,” I scolded. “We’re gonna get outta here.”
“How?” Taddy asked, clearing her throat. “Just how do you propose we do that?”
“I don’t know yet, but we will.”
“Shit, Vive. How can you be so certain?” Lex echoed Taddy’s concern, only with more skepticism, which infuriated me.
Inhaling deeply, a wind of fury rocketed through me. “Because I didn’t save Blake’s life by taking Sanderloo’s, give up my baby for adoption, spend a year in juvie, get into Columbia University, dodge a penthouse explosion, survive a plane crash, recover from being roofied, and fall in love with Seneca this semester just to have it all go to Hell at the hands of some horny, dumb, spoiled lunatic out for revenge over an accident that totally wasn’t our fault.”
“I love when you get all worked up like this,” Blake complimented, hope filling his voice.
“Why?” I asked, unsure what he meant exactly.
“Cause that means we’ll get out of here. You’re the most determined girl I know.”
“Here. Here,” Lex agreed.
I didn’t cry. I wanted to, but if my friends believed in me that much then I had to, as well. Right? Instead, I pushed my back closer to Taddy.
“Use your nails. Untie me.”
“I’m trying. Almost there.”
“Where is Jay?” Lex asked.
“I hear him. He’s in the kitchen. Sounds as if he’s looking through the cabinets for something.”
Wiggling my wrists, I felt the rope start to loosen. “Keep going, Taddy. I’m almost free.”
“Poppy. You alive?” Lex jerked her shoulders so hard it caused all of us to sway forward. “We’re getting outta here. Wake up!”
“Whaaa. Who’s there?” Poppy’s body swayed between Blake and Lex.
Thank God. She’s not dead.
“She’s blindfolded. She can’t see us,” Blake declared. “Poppy, its Blake. Lex, Taddy, and Vive are here, too. Are you okay?”
She coughed and sounded as if she spit before replying, “No. I haven’t eaten or bathed in two days. I’m hungry and I…smell. He’s going to kill us.” She started to hyperventilate.
“Breathe. Take a deep breath. Tell us what happened.”
She took a moment to put her thoughts together. I didn’t think she had it in her to tell us, but she started anyway. “The afternoon I interviewed Jay for my book, he invited me over here for a drink. To be honest, Vive, I had full-on-intentions of screwing him. I did. I wanted to get back at you for what you’d said to me earlier.”
“Honey, he’s all yours. Trust me. I’m D-O-N-E with him.”
Lex laughed. I couldn’t believe at a time like this she’d find a ‘funny’ but she did.
Poppy coughed again. “While doing research for my book, I started to correlate the accidents which led up to your roofie incident last semester. I interviewed Lex’s ex-boyfriend, Ford, who told me about the unidentified server at the club who slipped you the drinks. I got my hands on some unofficial aviation papers on your plane crash and the NYFD report on your explosion. I told Jay Austin I believed them all to be related and that someone was indeed out to see you all dead. But I couldn’t figure out for the life of me who it was exactly.”
“Well. Duh,” Taddy snapped.
“How did you know it was Jay Austin?”
“I didn’t. Not at first. Everyone I’ve interviewed for my book, I’ve run background checks on. You know, to make sure they were legit. I’d given the service firm Jay Austin’s name. It wasn’t until I was here that they called my cell. I didn’t think anything of it, so I answered the phone in front of him. We were in the living room. It was quiet. Jay Austin heard the background check guy tell me Sanderloo was his half-brother.”
“Jesus.” The thought of all this made bile come up from the back of my throat before I swallowed it back down. “I cannot believe I fell for that man. What a fucking trap.”
“I tried to leave. I was almost at the door, but he became violent, punched me in the face. I went out cold. I’ve been locked in his apartment ever since.”
“Everything sort of makes sense now,” Taddy groaned.
“Enough of this.” Blake tried to stand up from the chair. “Let’s get out of here.” He fell back down.
“Taddy,” I cried out as my hands started to loosen.
“I’ve almost got it...”
The second my right hand came free I reached inside my skirt, pulled out my cell, and dialed for help.
“911, what is your emergency?” the operator asked.
“Help! I need—”
Just then, the French doors to the library flew open. Jay Austin marched into the room, knocking the cell from my hands. It smacked against the wall. Nostrils flaring, lips pulling back to bare his teeth, he released a guttural roar. “I’m going to kill you!”
I’m Sorry
“You bitch. You’ve done it now!” Knuckling my hair, he jerked me to my feet, facing him. With crazy in his eyes, he pressed his lips against mine, kissing me.
I spit in his face, glaring at him, I didn’t back down. “Let us go.”
“No, babe. Never.” A vein near his temple pulsed visibly, creeping me out in all kinds of ways.
“You won’t get away with this.” I glanced around for something, anything I could thro
w at him.
He laughed with a false smile. “Oh, no? I’ve gotten away with everything so far. Ain’t that right, my sweet Poppy?”
“Fuuuck you,” she snapped back after a heavy breath.
“Sit!” Jay Austin pushed me back down in the chair. He reached behind me and started to tie my hands together. Defeated, I slumped in the chair as he forcefully grabbed on to both of my hands. I cried out, “You’re hurting me.”
“One by one, I’m going to kill you. All of you.”
“How?” Taddy asked in a strained voice.
“Suffocation.”
“No!” I shouted as loud and as hard as I possibly could at him. I didn’t stop until my voice cracked.
“You, my precious Vive, will get to watch each of your friends die. Then I’ll take you before killing myself.”
“Suicide?” I asked in disbelief. “You’re going to kill yourself?”
“Just like my mother did last year.” A tear streaked down Jay Austin’s face. “She couldn’t bare life without Sanderloo.”
I realized he wasn’t out just for revenge. He didn’t want to live.
“Jay. Please. I’m so sorry. It was a horrible mistake. An accident—”
“Shut up.” With one hand, he held both of my wrists and with the other, he slapped my face. The pain of his palm striking my cheek almost sent me flying out of my seat.
Blood. I tasted blood. That’s it! I kneed him in the nuts. Hard. He fell to the floor as I stood.
“Vive!” Taddy shouted. “My purse. The living room.”
Her gun. Yes! Not looking back to see if Jay was behind me, I kicked off my stilettos and sprinted out of the room as fast as I could.
Where is it?
Frantically, I searched the living room for Taddy’s purse. Fumbling about, I turned the pillows over. It’s red. Fendi. Come on.
“Ahhh, yes.” Grabbing it, I unzipped the handbag. The gun, shiny and cold, rested in my clammy hands. On the sofa, I bowed my head and closed my eyes, rocking back and forth, trying to get enough courage to shoot him. Please, God, give me the strength to do this…
“Viveca!” Jay Austin shouted, coming into the room. “Time for you to pay.” He had a sheet of plastic in his hands.
The purse hit the floor with a loud thud, a booming noise which echoed against the hardwood as I sprang to my feet. I can do this. I don’t have a choice. I held the gun in my hands.
“You going to take another life?” he asked.
“I saved Blake’s life that night. Just as I’ll save all of my friends’ lives today. Except yours.”
His face, the one I thought was so handsome, that I’d fallen in love with, seen at night before falling asleep and in the morning when I awoke, became white.
Okay, let’s be real here. I’d never held a gun before in my life, let alone shot one.
“Do it.”
“I—”
“Go ahead. Kill me.”
Uncertain if I could go through with it, I stepped back. “Do you have any idea the Hell you’ve put me through? You nearly killed Birdie Easton in that explosion last year.” Fumbling, I flipped the safety off. “Blake’s face will forever be scarred because of that plane crash.” With my thumb, I pulled the hammer back. “Taddy had a miscarriage because you roofied her.” Closing my left eye, staring at him with my right, I saw his sadness, despair, the desire to die. The real him. All the time we’d been dating, he’d been cold and aloof. It was nothing but a cover for his pain.
“Shoot me, Vive. Come on.”
“I live every day with the fact that I accidentally killed your brother. That I took a life. A large piece of my heart and soul died with Sanderloo. I’ve thought for the longest time I had nothing to live for.” My right hand uncocked the gun and put the safety back on. “I suppose I should thank you.”
“For what?” His eyes widened.
“For reminding me that I want to live—”
Just then, the front door flew open. “Police!”
“We’re in here!” I shouted.
Minutes later, Jay Austin was handcuffed and taken downtown.
Lex, Taddy, Blake, and I sat on the sofa with the detectives for a long time, describing in detail what happened.
Poppy was taken by ambulance to Manhattan General and treated for dehydration.
“The nightmare is over.” We all hugged one another and cried.
“Do ya’ll still believe in karma?” Blake asked.
We put our foreheads together and nodded.
“Let’s take a vacation,” I suggested.
“Spring break.” Blake grinned.
“Malibu,” Taddy voiced her favorite place.
A few weeks later, Seneca, my Manhattanites, and I rented a Malibu house with private stairs to our own dry, sandy beach in a cove with surfing, swimming and fishing, on a dead-end street on secluded Latigo Cove.
The ocean was filled with amazing birds, porpoises and whales.
During the day, we’d hike in Solstice State Park to the waterfall in Corral Canyon and at night, we’d walk along the beach at low tide to Paradise Cove.
Pepperdine University was only two miles away. Taddy insisted we tour the campus and meet with academic advisors about transferring.
“It’s a beautiful college,” I muttered to Lex, Taddy and Blake as we sat in the admissions office. “So pretty.”
“Sure is. I’ve never seen so many tan, gorgeous people with white teeth in my entire life. Are they all…straight?” Blake asked the woman wearing a pant-suit behind the desk, whose nameplate read ‘Midge Rawlings’.
“Pardon?” Midge asked.
“Mrs. Rawlings, where are the gays?” he clarified.
Here we go…
Her face turned bright red as Lex started to giggle.
“Mr. Morgan, while we have a diverse student body from all over the world, let me be the first to remind you that our university is consistently ranked as one of the top twenty conservative colleges in the country.” She beamed.
“What exactly does a conservative college mean?” I asked, hoping to get some clarity.
“We provide an important counterbalance to the progressivism and liberalism which pervade so much of American higher education.”
“Pervade?” Taddy snapped. “Mrs. Rawlings, do you know how I paid for my tuition at Columbia this semester?”
“Your parents…” She smiled.
“Playboy,” Taddy corrected. “My pictorial was pretty fab.”
“That it was,” Lex agreed. She chomped on her gum loudly before asking, “Speaking of parents, Mrs. Rawlings, any idea who my folks are?”
Midge leaned back in her chair. Taking Lex’s challenge, she reached for her application and read top to bottom. “Easton. Ohhhh.” She snapped her fingers. “You must be the granddaughter of Easton Sports over there in Van Nuys. We use some of their athletic equipment with our teams.”
Taddy snorted. I bit my lower lip.
“No, not quite. My parents are Eddie and Birdie…Easton.”
“The rockers?”
She nodded.
“Oh, dear…” Midge sighed.
I reached for Taddy’s hand and gave a gentle squeeze. “We don’t belong here.”
“Nope.” Lex popped her gum.
“Thank you for your time and the tour. You truly have the most beautiful campus I’ve ever seen,” I complimented Midge and stood. “Let’s go.”
As we headed to the parking lot, we all started to laugh. Tears filled our eyes as we put our sunglasses on.
“You do realize we’re stuck in the Big Apple, right? Like forever,” Blake admitted.
“Don’t you dare say that,” Taddy scolded.
“There are over a million people who live on our island of Manhattan. It’s the only town in the world where we can reinvent ourselves, over and over again, and no one will keep score or try and push us down.”
“Oh, really?” It sure as shit didn’t feel like it.
“Yes. Lo
oks like Jay Austin will be locked up for life. And Poppy and you are becoming fast friends. I think our sophomore year could be our best ever.” Lex nudged me. I’d never heard her be so optimistic before.
“We got a good thing going, us Manhattanites. All besties forever.” Taddy hugged me.
We sure do.
On the last night in Malibu, Seneca and I retreated to our sleeping quarters early.
“Are you ready to go back home?” he asked, taking his shirt then his pants off.
I stood there, admiring his tan muscles for a second before replying, “The California weather sure does look good on you.”
“Come here.” His voice was harsh with arousal.
Admiring his lust-filled tone, and the way he stroked himself, I stepped out of my pink sundress, naked, and crawled onto the California King bed.
I cupped his low-hanging balls. Mmm. Then I flicked my tongue over his sensitive flesh.
“That’s it, Luyu.” His lips quirked as he groaned then, ever so gently, he put his hands on the back of my head, pushing me further onto him.
“Mmm.” I loved having him in my mouth. All of him. Abandoning myself to the pleasure of pleasing him, I enjoyed making him happy.
His hands found their way between my damp legs and played with my swollen clit. My flesh throbbed against his fingers as I stopped sucking and gazed up at him.
Focused and in control, his tongue caressed my nipples as he slid effortlessly inside me. First gently, just the tip. Then a bit more.
“You feel so good,” I admitted eagerly.
“You want it all?” he asked, holding on to me.
Narrowing my eyes, I licked my lips and whimpered, “Please.”
“Beg for it, Luyu.” His voice was firm, hoarse as his raw sensuousness carried me to new heights.
And so I did. I panted, “Seneca. Mine. Now,” in his ear as he fucked me good and hard.
“I’m deep and thick inside you.” His hardness electrified me as he picked up speed and rhythm, pumping, thrusting, fucking.
The fire spread to my heart. “I love you, Seneca!” Unable to control the outcry any longer, my breath came in long moans. I dug my nails deep into his shoulders, breathing so hard. Colors, bright and neon, burst behind my eyelids. “I love having you inside of me. I love how you make me feel.”