I Don't Want To Be

  Married Anymore!

  By

  Mario V. Farina

  Dedicated to Maryellen who made a suggestion that changed everything!

  Copyright 2017 Mario V. Farina

  All Rights Reserved

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  Correspondence may be directed to:

  Mario V. Farina

  Email: [email protected]

  "Dear, I don't want to be married anymore!"

  Mr. and Mrs. Ted Courtland had just finished a luscious breakfast of blueberry pancakes with real maple syrup and fresh strawberries on the side. Seated in the breakfast nook of their modest suburban home, they were sipping their second cup of coffee. It was a warm July morning. Ted was still in pajamas and Marie, in a thin, filmy nightgown.

  Ted laughed, and leaned back in his chair. "Funny!" exclaimed.

  "I mean it!" she stated unemotionally.

  Realizing that his wife was serious, Ted, stunned, fell silent. "What are you saying," he finally muttered? "You can't mean this!"

  "I'm tired of being married," she said. "It has nothing to do with you. There is no one else. I don't know, there may be something wrong with me. I'm tired of being married. I want out of our marriage!"

  "You've never said there was anything wrong," objected Ted. "We've been married two years, and, for me, it's been wonderful. We've even been talking about having a baby. What has gone wrong so unexpectedly?"

  "It suddenly came to me, only a few days ago," she replied. "It's like what that old song says, 'the thrill is gone,' but not for the reason it gives. You've been a good man to me. I have no complaints."

  "Then what's caused you to say you don't want to be married anymore? What thrill are you talking about, honey," he asked. "We had a lovely courtship, a happy engagement, a beautiful wedding and honeymoon. I don't understand! Every day is a thrill day for me. I love our marriage! I love you! The thrill of being with you continues in me every moment of every day!"

  "It's the thrill I once had of meeting someone new," she said, "It's the early dating, the wondering how the other person feels about me, savoring the first kiss, feeling the electricity with the touch of our fingertips, the clasping together of our hands, the hugs, the dinners out, the movies, the plays, all those things that lead to my first strong sexual feelings. These things happened and will not happen again. This is what I mean when I say, 'the thrill is gone.'"

  "I had those feeling too," replied Ted. "With us that period was called dating. Then I began thinking of marriage. Didn't you?"

  "Yes," she responded. "There was the wondering of when you would pop the question. Would it be romantic? Would you get on one knee? Would you hand me a ring? So much more!"

  "That was our engagement period," said Ted. "An engagement is supposed to happen only once. It has all the fireworks of the dating period, but with even more intensity. That's when a loving couple truly gets to know each other!"

  "But all this happens only once," Marie commented! "Then the marriage begins, with all its problems of a couple getting used to each other, finding a place to live, and all the rest. Eventually, humdrum begins. All that remains of the other exciting experiences, become no more than memories."

  "The thrills of meeting someone, and beginning to know him or her, are indeed memorable," Ted said, "but true happiness that comes with marrying the right person begins the day after the honeymoon. There is nothing humdrum with a loving marriage. There is a deep relationship that only grows stronger with the years, and continues even after the death of one of the parties. Children, and even grandchildren, add to this depth. I know I sound like some prehistoric creature by saying these words, but this is what I learned as a child from my parents, and that belief has never left me. I ask you, no, I beg you to reconsider what you have said. Don't break up our marriage!"

  "I'm compelled to do so," she responded.

  "Compelled? Why?"

  "So that I can renew again and again the experiences that go with meeting someone, of dating, and being engaged."

  "And . . . "

  "There is no and. I don't want to be married anymore! I simply want to repeat the whole cycle; sort of like watching a great movie again, listening to a lovely melody, or . . ."

  "Marie! That's nutty, exploded Ted! "It doesn't work that way! In life, there is a time for everything! There's a time for dating, and a time for being engaged. After the engagement, there is marriage. And marriage is forever. Life is not like being on a merry-go-round in a carnival! What you're suggesting is not a model for a life well lived!"

  Marie continued as if she had heard not a word. "Later today," she said, "I'll be seeing a lawyer that Elaine told me about. I will be moving in with her, until the divorce is complete. I wish you the best, but the best that you can give me, is not good enough. I must find a new road upon which to travel."

  Some weeks later, Marie Pendleton, having resumed her maiden name, met Philip Marshall. She told him that she was twenty-one though her real age was twenty-four, and that she was unmarried. Philip, said he was twenty-seven, a recent divorcé, and a college graduate. He was taller than she by several inches, slim, dark-haired, and handsome.

  "I'm wealthy," he had told her. "I own a horse ranch in Colorado that brings in more money than I'm able to count. But, I'm lonely. I'm looking for someone with whom I can build an exciting and joyful life. With the right person, the gates of Heaven will open for us well before the both of us shall depart this earth."

 

  Following their meeting, there were the thrills that came from long looks into each others eyes, phone calls lasting long into the morning hours, exciting breakfasts at diners, elegant dinners at fancy restaurants, and bouquets of roses received every few days. Marie fell in love with Philip, heart, mind, and soul. She began to think that her thoughts about repeating thrilling experiences may have been wrong.

 

  She thought about what Ted had said concerning a deep and loving marriage that would last throughout life. Surely this man could provide it for her where Ted had not been able to. With Philip, her life would be replete with everlasting thrills. With him, thrills would never be depleted!

  The second month's anniversary of their meeting was to be very special, they decided. They were to take a three day holiday in Manhattan, stay at the best hotel they could find, dine at the finest restaurants, and enjoy, at least, one Broadway play. Marie felt like a princess. She knew this was the life that she had been born to live!

  Arriving in New York, they registered at the Bryant Park Hotel as Mr. and Mrs. Philip Marshall. "This is only a formality," he said to her. "We can save a little money this way. There will be twin beds in the room, and we'll stay in pajamas while we sleep. We will wait to validate our love as circumstances warrant." She thought this arrangement was fair enough.

  Marie had planned to be as beautiful during this holiday as modern beauticians could conjure up their magic. At Philips's expense, she had purchased an elegant golden gown, had had her hair and nails done to the peak of their beauty, and had purchased a pearl necklace with matching earrings. She could have spent an additional amount of Philip's money on sexy under things if she had wanted to do so, but had decided there was no sense to it, since no one would be viewing them except her. One thing was for sure: she was going to be the most beautiful woman at the hotel that evening.

  Immediately
after having registered, they had a light dinner at Luigi's, and finished eating just in time to be on Broadway to view the play, A Bronx Tale.

  Marie was tired when they returned to the hotel and was ready for bed. Philip said he was tired also. In turn, each of them changed into their pajamas in the bathroom. After some good-natured joshing about the appearance of the other, Marie slipped under the covers of one bed, while Philip did the same with the other. They turned off the lights.

  Marie fell asleep almost immediately; however, suddenly, she discovered a naked intruder had joined her under the covers and was attempting to touch her in forbidden areas. This was not part of the bargain, she thought. She needed to find a graceful departure from the plans that Philip had in mind. "Oh, Philip," she exclaimed. "Before I can go further with this, you need to fulfill a fetish that I hoped some day I would reveal to you!"

  "Anything! Anything at all," he said breathing heavily. "What is it?"

  "At times like these," she whispered, "only strawberries can transform me from the calm, sedate woman that I basically am, into a fierce, unruly, sexual tiger. I must devour frozen strawberries from your chest!"

  "Strawberries!" He blurted. "Where am I going to find frozen strawberries in Manhattan at this time of night?"

  "I'm so sorry darling," she replied. "We had planned to wait to validate our love until a later time. I would have told you about this sooner had I known you wouldn't be able to wait. Only frozen strawberries will work, my dear. By consuming them from your chest, my ardor for love-making will grow to a ferocious peak. Without, them, the coldness of my response will turn you into an ice cube."

  "All right, all right," he exclaimed. "You've convinced me! Wait here!"

  Marie averted her eyes as Philip leapt out of bed, picked up his pajamas from the floor and dashed into the bathroom. A couple of minutes later, he came out looking somewhat disheveled, but energetic, and shouted, "I'll be back as soon as I can!"

  After he had left the room, Marie stepped to the floor, walked to where she had neatly stacked her clothing, and changed back into the elegant gown she had worn to the theater. She picked up the receiver of the hotel phone on bedside table, and pressed the button labeled "Desk".

  "Concierge!" A sleepy male's voice announced at the other end. "Please get me a taxi that will take me to the nearest bus station," she said. "My husband is staying here. He'll pay the bill." She placed the necklace and earrings that she had purchased on the table, then exited the room.

  As she rode the eighty miles back to Elaine's home, gone from her mind were all thoughts of missing thrills, living a humdrum life, and the other things she had complained about to Ted. All she wanted to do was go back to the comfort of the loving marriage she realized she had had with him.

  "Elaine," she asked her friend when the latter had opened the door and let her it, "Do you suppose Ted will take me back? I just had a horrific experience that I would like to erase from my mind as soon as I can."

  "I don't know, Marie," Elaine responded. "He was all broken up about this when it happened, but he seems to have recovered some. He told me he felt your views about life, love, and marriage were rather shallow. Here, call him up," she said, and proffered her cell phone.

  "I'm scared," Marie admitted.

  "Do it! This way you'll know."

  Marie took the phone and tapped out Ted's number. "Hello Ted," she ventured.

  "Oh, Marie," exclaimed Ted excitedly. "I'm so glad you called. It looks like you were right about thrills. I was sounding old fashioned! But, I'm glad you've been going with someone more your style. I'm sincerely happy for you!"

  "And, I have found someone who agrees with me that marriage is a forever thing!" he continued. "We've been dating, and have just now gotten engaged! Congratulate us! We're so thrilled!"