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It’s frenzied, both of our h*ps thrusting, bodies mashing into one another. My legs start to tremble as I clasp onto him tightly and he moves his arms down to my h*ps to help grind me down on his dick.
It’s wild and glorious and I’ve never felt anything like it in my entire life.
My orgasm catches me unaware. Usually I can feel the slow creep of it pushing through me, but this time it slams into me with the force of a runaway freight train. I can do nothing but tighten my legs and arms around Brody, even as I cry out in pained relief.
It feels so good that it actually hurts. It hurts so wonderfully, that I’ll take it over and over again.
“Brody,” I whimper into his neck, tears starting to slide down my cheeks as my body shudders and quakes in pleasure.
“Almost there, baby,” he grunts, thrusting into me faster. “Almost there. ”
I can still feel pulsing glimmers of my cl**ax, and I hang on tight to Brody. Then, with a supremely violent push, he slams into me and throws his head back, shouting to the ceiling, “Oh God,” as his entire body shudders in ecstasy.
Brody falls back onto the bed, taking me with him. Our panting fills the room and Brody’s body continues to quiver as he holds me tight, still lodged deep inside of me.
It is simply the most beautiful experience of my life, and I just kissed my soul goodbye for good.
***
My alarm goes off at six AM, and I lazily reach over to turn it off. A smile comes to me as memories of last night with Brody assault my senses. Sighing in pure happiness, I roll over and open my eyes, only to find the other side of my bed empty.
My smile falters and then fades away, as the realization that Brody left at some point during the night seeps into me.
It’s not that he had to stay all night. I mean, it’s not like he came over here with one idea in mind of wanting to protect me from Chad.
And, it’s not like we had made the most beautiful love last night, experiencing a connection that I know deep in my bones that most people will never understand. I felt it, and I know he did too.
Because after… after he gently pulled out of me and went to the bathroom to dispose of the condom.
After… he came back to the bed, pulled me into his arms, tucked my face into the crook of his neck, and gently rubbed my back. We didn’t talk at first, both immersed in the warm cocoon of intimacy and comfort.
After… we just chatted. About silly stuff, about important stuff. What we talked about doesn’t really matter, but how we talked does. It was easy, funny at times, but most definitely without any drama. We talked mostly about our families and the stark differences we have. Brody comes from a loving and close-knit family, whereas mine is plastic and superficial.
I had told Brody, “Remember when you said you couldn’t be a part of my world? That you didn’t belong there?”
He whispered softly, “Yeah, I remember. ”
“Well, I don’t belong there either. ”
He tightened his arms around me and rubbed his cheek along the top of my head. “No… I suppose you don’t. ”
Taking a deep breath, I exhale it out slowly as those memories fade into the harsh reality that he’s gone, and I have no clue where we stand. Rolling out of bed, I take a moment and reach my arms up to stretch, feeling the pop of my spine and the slight soreness between my legs. Memories of Brody thrusting frantically in me last night just before he came assaults me, and my entire body tingles.
I’m going to need to get that under control, or I’ll never be able to be near the guy without possibly combusting in excitement.
I walk around the bed, pulling back on my underwear and pajamas that I discarded last night. Padding into the kitchen, I slide my fingers through my hair, hoping to tame the mess I’m sure is sticking up all over the place.
It’s one of the hazards of wearing my hair short and writhing around on a bed in passion.
Stepping into the kitchen, my chest constricts and then sighs in relief when I see Brody standing at the window, looking out at the ocean. He’s wearing only his shorts, and my blood sings in approval over how gorgeous he looks. His chest bare and muscled and his long hair messy.
Turning to me, he smiles in welcome. “Hey. ”
“Hey,” I say, still disbelieving he’s standing here when I had just written him off moments ago. “I thought you had left. ”
“Nah. I’m just an early riser. Got up and made some coffee. ”
He turns away from me and pulls a cup out of my cupboard. I had been hoping he’d show some sign of affection… after all we shared last night. Instead, he’s a bit distant, not exactly cold, but there is a wall back in place that I’m sensing.
I watch as he pours me a cup, his shoulders stiff, which is in turn making me tense. I know he’s getting ready to unload something bad on me.
Brody turns, leaving the steaming cup of java on the counter, and his eyes look pained. He takes a deep breath and lets it out, and I’m amazed as warmth starts filling up his gaze.
“I’m not sure how to handle this ‘morning-after’ scenario,” he says bluntly.
“Why is that?” I ask, tilting my head to the side.
“Because I have all these feelings running through me, and it’s overwhelming. I’ve been pretty much a robot for so many years, turning off any emotion and building up concrete walls. It’s just unsettling. Last night was unsettling. ”
I can feel the frown that takes my face hostage. No woman likes hearing that. “I’m sorry,” is all I can think to say.
I’m startled when Brody takes one large stride toward me and grasps onto my shoulders. I look up at him, and his face is filled with apology. “No, I don’t mean that in a bad way. It’s unsettling in that some barriers were crumbled last night, and it’s left me exposed. I’m just trying to deal with this new sensation… of caring. ”
“Oh,” floats out of my mouth as my heart starts to fill up with joy.
“Alyssa… I like you,” he says as he pulls me in a bit closer to him. “A lot. I care for you, I worry for you, I respect you, and I lust after you. I want to f**k you over and over again until neither one of us can walk. But I’m also broken and twisted, which means these feelings I have are going to be tainted. I don’t want to hurt you. ”
I snake my hands up his chest and wind them around his neck. Stepping in close, I lay my head on his chest and pull him in tight for a hug. He responds by putting his arms around my waist and squeezing.
“We can take this slow,” I assure him as I listen to the steady thump of his heart under my cheek. “You don’t have to be overwhelmed. ”
Brody’s hold on me loosens and he pulls back slightly, causing me to look up at him. “See… that’s just it. I think I want to be overwhelmed. If last night is what overwhelming feels like, then I want that every night. It’s still just… unsettling. And you need to bear with me while I process this. ”
“Okay,” I tell him as I bring a hand to his cheek. “I’ve got your back on this. ”
He chuckles at me. “I know you do. You’ve had it since you learned my secret. ”
Stepping back, I take Brody’s hands in mine and look at him seriously. “You know you can tell me anything… I’ll never judge you. But… is there someone you can talk to? About these things? I mean, have you considered counseling or something to help adjust?”
He lifts my right hand up and brings it to his lips, brushing a feather kiss over my knuckles. “I talk to my parole officer, Jimbo, sometimes. He’s constantly yapping at me to push past my boundaries. He’d be proud of me for last night. ”
“Oh, dear God… don’t you dare tell him about last night,” I say with mock horror, losing the effect with a giggle at the end.
Brody leans down and kisses me, slowly and with promise. When he pulls back, he says, “The details are between you and me. But I will tell him about you. It’ll get him off my back. ”
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“You like him,” I say, smiling with enlightenment. “He’s a friend. ”
“Yes, I like him and no, he’s not a friend. He can’t be because he’s responsible for me. But he definitely would be… if things were different. ”
I look at the clock on the microwave and sigh. “I need to get to The Haven. Starving dogs and all. ”
Grinning, he gives me a light kiss and releases his hold on me. “Okay. I can’t make it in today, because I have to work a double shift. ”
“No worries. I was doing this on my own long before you came along. ”
“I have no doubts you can handle The Haven. I’m worried about Chad. Will you check in with me throughout the day?”
“Sure,” I tell him with a smile. “But I’m sure there’s nothing to worry about. ”
“Do you really believe that?” Brody asks me somberly.
“Probably not,” I murmur. “Chad’s off his rocker. But we can’t let it stop us living our lives, right?”
“Right,” he agrees reluctantly. “But still check in, okay?”
“Okay. ”
“Any chance you’ll come by Last Call tonight while I’m working?”
“I don’t need you to watch over me every minute, Brody. ”
“Yeah, but I like watching you,” he says huskily, and my skin tingles all over. “Come by tonight, okay?”
“Okay,” I capitulate, because when it boils down to it, I like watching him too.
Chapter 17
Brody
Sliding a beer across the bar to a customer, I glance toward the door for what may be the hundredth time in the last hour to see if Alyssa walks through.
Nothing.
So I grab the twenty-dollar bill the dude slides across to me and make change. I nod as he puts a few ones in my tip jar, and glance back at the door again.
I’m on edge… dying to see Alyssa. True to her word, she kept in touch with me today via text messages, which forced me to figure out the fancy phone Casey bought me. I wasn’t sure how often she would contact me, but she actually settled into a routine of sending me a funny text at the top of every hour.
Her first one said, Houston, we have lift off, with no sightings of strange aliens.
I stared at the text for a moment, wanting to write something back that was witty and flirty, but I’m Brody Markham… not a lot of that stuff going on with me. So I merely responded, Good news. Keep the updates coming.
She gave me a response back that I had no clue what it meant.
:)
I’ll need to ask her about that later.
Thereafter, I got another funny text every hour, and it eased my worry tremendously.
Looking back at the door again, I mentally chastise myself for this longing I seem to have for her. While I like Alyssa a lot, I don’t want that type of connection… a dependency. I want to keep it casual, because I’m done with giving my heart to someone. Not sure I even have one left, not after Stacy shredded it and prison blackened my soul.
“Who are you expecting to come walking through that door?” I hear from behind me.
Turning, I see Hunter walking up to the cash register to calculate the day’s take.
“What do you mean?”
Hunter gives me a quick glance over his shoulder, and then turns his attention back to the money. “You keep looking at the door. Worried Stacy is going to come by?”
“No,” I say distractedly, because I’m not. I’m pretty convinced she got the message to stay the f**k away from me.
“Then who?” he asks genially, while silently counting out the stack of twenties in his hand.
“No one,” I tell him, and then walk down the bar to take care of a customer.
I busy myself for another half hour while the evening crowd starts filtering in, and Hunter helps me tend the bar for a while. I try to keep my looks toward the door to a minimum, but with one such glance, I’m finally rewarded when Alyssa comes walking in.