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"We're not dating. This is just sex, plain and simple. Can you handle that?" he asked, stopping his ministrations on her fingers as he waited for her answer.
Yes she could. She was in no position to get involved in a serious relationship. As much as she wanted sex she also didn't want the hassle of having to answer to someone or having to take a chance on a stranger. Following through with this arrangement with Trevor would make her feel more comfortable and she wouldn't have to worry about hurt feelings in the end because they both knew what this was and what they wanted.
"And this arrangement stays between us?" she asked, knowing if he couldn't keep this a secret she'd end it before it started. It was nobody's business what she did. She also didn't want to have people talking behind her back.
"I wouldn't have it any other way," Trevor said huskily as his eyes dipped to her cle**age.
"Can you answer something for me?" she asked, genuinely surprised that he'd be willing to get into an arrangement with her. "Why do you want to do this with me? You could probably get any woman you wanted into bed?"
"Well," he said with a sly little grin as he dipped his head and pressed a kiss to her neck, making her gasp softly, "you're discreet, you know where we stand, and I want you," he said, creating a trail of lingering kisses to her ear.
She noticed he didn't say anything like she was beautiful or pretty and she forced herself not to be disappointed. It was more than enough that a man like Trevor wanted her at all and she wasn't about to screw this up before it started.
Chapter 16
"We're really going to do this?" Zoe asked, slightly panting.
"Not unless you don't want to," he said, praying she wouldn't tell him to stop. If she told him to stop he would, but he wasn't sure he'd survive. She tasted so damn good and felt even better.
Her skin was so soft and warm, he thought as he pushed off the bed, never taking his mouth away from her neck as he moved to kneel on the floor in front of her, gently pushing her legs apart as he settled himself between them.
As he licked and kissed his way down to her cle**age he reached down and yanked his towel off and let it drop. When he reached up to do the same for Zoe she stopped him by grabbing her towel and held it tightly against her chest. He pressed one last kiss to the top slope of her breast and sat back.
"What's wrong?" he asked, reaching up to push back a loose strand of that mahogany hair that he once foolishly thought was plain. Now he realized how beautiful it was with natural hues of light brown running through it. He also liked that it made her baby blue eyes brighter, almost as if they glowed.
When she started that little nervous habit of worrying her bottom lip and looking downward as she noticeably tightened her grip on the towel, he wondered if she was changing her mind. He really hoped she wasn't. He needed this so damn badly that he was in actual physical pain now. Never in his life had he wanted a woman this badly before and he knew if he didn't have her and get her out of his system that nothing in his life would ever be right again.
"Don't tell me you're getting shy on me," he teased softly, noting the rather lovely blush creeping up her cheeks. "Holy shit, you are," he blurted out, earning a glare from her.
"Sweet--Zoe," he said, catching himself in time before he said something foolish. This was an arrangement, nothing more and he wouldn't hurt her or confuse her by using endearments to make her think otherwise. "I just saw you na**d not ten minutes ago," he pointed out gently.
"I know," she murmured hesitantly as she continued to worry her bottom lip, making him a little more nervous.
Please don't change your mind, Zoe, he chanted in his head as he dropped his hands away from her towel and placed them on her knees to see how she'd react. When she didn't shove his hands away or flinch, he took that as a good sign.
"It's just that," she clasped the towel in one hand and dropped the other on her leg where she began to absently trace his fingers, "you surprised me in the shower and I was so focused on trying to figure out what happened last night and why you were na**d in my bathroom that I didn't give it much thought. "
"And now. . . . ," he prompted.
She raised her eyes and looked at him and he had to fight back the urge to pull her into his arms and hold her. Zoe looked so miserable and scared. She pulled her hand away from his and joined the other one in holding the towel against her as a shield.
"And now I'm not sure you're going to want to do this," she mumbled, sounding defeated.
"Why wouldn't I want to do this, Zoe? It was my idea and believe me when I tell you I've been thinking about doing this for a while now," he said, running his hands slowly up and down her towel covered legs to offer comfort and because he could not sit here and not touch her.
"Yeah right," she said, snorting her disbelief. "I'm sure you've been tossing and turning at night, trying desperately to get me out of your head," she said sarcastically.
He chuckled as he ran his hands back down to her knees and with a simple move, slid them back up her legs and beneath the towel, earning an intriguing little gasp from Zoe. "I wouldn't exactly say I've been tossing and turning, but I will admit that you've starred in a few interesting fantasies that have kept me up at night," he said, groaning softly as his hands ran over warm smooth soft skin.
Touching Zoe was like nothing he'd ever experienced before. He'd dated a lot of women in the past and none of them were as soft as Zoe. They were either too thin, covered in smooth muscle or slightly soft, but had perfect figures or he wouldn't have dated them. At least he'd thought they had at the time. Maybe they had, but right now nothing turned him on more than Zoe, a complication that he planned on working out of his system with plenty of sex until he grew bored with her and could return to his usual type and find the woman of his dreams.
"You don't have to lie to convince me to do this," Zoe said, trying to shift back on the bed, but he wasn't having that. He gently cupped her bare h*ps and held her where he wanted her.
"I may be a lot of things, Zoe, but I'm not a liar. You're not my usual type, I'll admit that," he said, not at all surprised when she simply nodded her agreement instead of acting hurt like a lot of women he'd dated in the past would have done, earning his respect. He appreciated her no-nonsense attitude. "Right now I want you, Zoe, but like you I'm not looking for a relationship," he partially lied.
He just wasn't looking for a relationship with her.
He waited anxiously for her to say something and finally after a minute she mumbled, "But I'm fat," she said, sounding so damn distraught that he had to fight back a smile.
"And you're afraid that will turn me off?" he guessed after she became quiet once again.
"Zoe," he sighed her name as he leaned forward and brushed his lips against hers, surprising her and just because he couldn't help himself he kissed her again, taking his time to taste her lips and damn near groaning when she moved her lips, hesitantly at first, against his.
When she released her death grip on her towel so that she could fist her hands in his hair and she opened her mouth for his invasion he had to force himself not to thrust forward and bury himself to the hilt. It had been five years for her and he didn't want to scare her off with his desperation for her.