He rolls over the kayak’s side
into the water, deftly bringing
me with him. “Not enough.”
Chapter 30
LOVE
MICHAEL’S DIVE LOG – VOLUME 10
Dive Buddy: solo
Date: 07/01
Dive #: --
Location: Grand Cayman
Dive Site: East End dock
Weather Condition: calm night
Water Condition: not enough water pressure in the shower
Depth: sprinkling down on me
Visibility: shining
Water Temp: intense warmth
Bottom Time: hard to know—just minutes I think
Comments:
I was on a total high all day today. When Leesie and I picked up Aunty J, she beamed at me and swore her foot felt better already. Wound treatment in the hyperbaric chamber takes a series of one or two hour sessions over days—maybe weeks—so it was probably her O2 high talking. Still cool. Made me feel amazing.
Amazed. Astounded. That’s kind of how I’ve felt since last night. The high lasted all afternoon while Jaz telephoned all her friends from church with the good news and hit them up for rides to and from the hospital, and Leesie and I slowly forged ahead reading The Book of Mormon. We’d read, she’d explain, and I asked questions.
I got suspicious when she insisted on skipping a whole bunch of chapters.
“What’s in it?” Maybe that’s where they hide all the secret stuff about polygamy.
“Isaiah. Bible prophet. He wrote in code so the king wouldn’t off with his head. I get lost. Nephi explains what it means here.” She smoothed down the page.
She was intensely happy. I didn’t want to question her. I’m tempted to give a thumbs up to the missionaries, so I can watch her flip out. I want to keep her happy. She hasn’t been like this for so long. I always knew this was a huge deal for her, but seeing how thrilled she is that I’ll finally admit there seems to be a divine power out there makes me wish I could have figured it out sooner. I was grieving, angry. An idiot.
But now as I drive through Georgetown at rush hour worrying that I won’t make it back to East End in time for the night dive I swapped my morning dives for, cursing my own stupidity for not taking the northern route, I wonder what’s in those mysterious chapters. Maybe I’ll read them myself. No harm in looking.
Leesie wouldn’t lie. Or would she? Doubt creeps into the equation. I know—it’s stupid. She wouldn’t lie. I don’t doubt I felt a divine essence last night. I can’t doubt I felt led all day. I recognize I’ve been led before. But who says that is the same thing as the Beings she describes? Huge leap. Gigantic leap.
I’m working hard searching for that essence in the Book of Mormon. So far I’m touched and intrigued, but who is to say I won’t find the same sacredness in other holy books? Should I study those, too, and pray about them? Does the Book of Mormon being true make everything else false? Leesie believes in the Bible like other Christians, plus a bunch of stuff Joseph Smith wrote. Not stuff. Revelations.
If I were in love with a Buddhist girl or a Catholic girl or a Jewish girl, would I have these feelings about her faith? Am I imagining everything to please Leesie? To keep her?
I used to think all religion was crap—crazy stuff used to enslave people. Isn’t that what most educated people think? Whether they go to church or not? But if there is something real in the concept of God, is there something real in all religion? Is some lies? Some truth? How does He feel about all the evil stuff people have done—still do—in the name of religion? Is He down with crusades, burning witches, and suicide bombers?
I can’t comprehend the whole Jesus Christ dying for my sins thing. Leesie says no one does—you have to take it on faith. Feel it.
Faith. That’s another thing I don’t get.
I see it in Leesie. She’s got too much faith—in me.
I make it to East End with no time to spare for dinner. It’s okay. Leesie fed me and Jaz a giant lunch. I’ll live. I bolt down to the dock and start flinging tanks into the boat, pushing myself into a frenzy so I can’t think up more doubts, more questions. I work so fast the boat is ready ten minutes before anybody’s going to show up.
I’m sweaty and hot. I slip off my T-shirt and stand in the dock shower a minute in my swimsuit. I close my eyes and try to recapture how I felt when Leesie and I prayed together before I left Aunty Jaz’s shack.
Leesie didn’t make me kneel down or do anything freaky. She took my hand and bowed her head right there where we were sitting. “Bless Michael as he learns line upon line that he will come to know and Love Thee, Thy Son, and Thy gospel.”
Line upon line. Step by step.
Standing on the lonely dock with my face turned up to the refreshing cool water, I try to address Him—Leesie’s God—not a vague divine being. “Dear Heavenly Father,” I whisper and can’t continue.
I’m engulfed in love.
Intimate.
Personal.
Overflowing.
A father’s love.
A brother’s love.
A love that feels like home.
Chapter 31
PRODIGAL
LEESIE HUNT / CHATSPOT LOG / O7/03 2:22 PM
Leesie327 says: Good you’re online. I so need to vent.
Kimbo69 says: What’s he done now?
Leesie327 says: Michael? I’m not mad at HIM. Michael is perfection.
Kimbo69 says: He’s hot—but the guy’s got his flaws.
Leesie327 says: I didn’t think I could love him more, but every day I do.
Kimbo69 says: So that study thing you’re doing is going well? He’s swallowing the Mormon stuff?
Leesie327 says: It’s not like that. This is the most beautiful experience. I wish I could explain it to you.
Kimbo69 says: No thanks. Don’t turn your religious zeal on me. We have an agreement, remember?
Leesie327 says: He prayed. Really prayed. And God answered him. He called me so excited.
Kimbo69 says: God or Michael?
Leesie327 says: Very funny.
Kimbo69 says: So you’re going to live happily ever after?
Leesie327 says: I was going to type YES, but then I thought of Phil. That will always hurt—but Michael is trying so hard, dropping all his barriers—for me.
Kimbo69 says: How are you going to tell Michael that you and Phil were fighting over him in that pickup?
Leesie327 says: I’m never going to. I won’t tell anyone. Promise me, Kim. Never say a thing.
Kimbo69 says: Calm down. You know you can trust me. What interrupted perfection in paradise?
Leesie327 says: It was dumb. I shouldn’t let stuff like that upset me. I dealt with worse every day in high school.
Kimbo69 says: You’re making me crazy. WHAT HAPPENED?
Leesie327 says: Michael has to work through the 4th of July weekend, so he slept on Jaz’s porch last night and took me back down to East End this morning to go diving while Aunty Jaz got her treatment. Jaz’s friend picked her up and took Jaz to her house for a change of scenery. She must be having a good time. She’s still not back.
Kimbo69 says: Did you get hurt diving?
Leesie327 says: Dani and Seth were on the boat with us.
Kimbo69 says: Did Miss Sleeze-bucket hit on your man?
Leesie327 says: No. She tried to save him from the clutches of the evil Mormon devil-worshippers.
Kimbo69 says: What?
Leesie327 says: She grew up in the South going to one of those churches that show anti-Mormon videos to protect their flock.
Kimbo69 says: Churches do that?
Leesie327 says: She said that if I don’t turn away from my evil ways and find Christ, I’ll be damned. Apparently, I’m no longer a Christian.
Kimbo69 says: She lectured you?
Leesie327 says: And I sat there in stunned silence.
Kimbo69 says: She’s one to talk.
Leesie327 says: My dad always taught us
“contention is of the devil.” Arguing with someone who wants to fight makes everyone angry. Pointless.
Kimbo69 says: You let her get away with it?
Leesie327 says: I didn’t want it to get ugly in front of Michael. Turning the other cheek is a lot harder than it sounds.
Kimbo69 says: So what happened?
Leesie327 says: Michael told her to shut up. Seth almost decked him.
Kimbo69 says: That sounds peaceful. You did this in front of all the paying customers?
Leesie327 says: No. We were up front. Michael was driving the boat.
Kimbo69 says: He defended you. That’s romantic.
Leesie327 says: I brokered a truce. By the time we got out to the dive site, they were all business as usual.
Kimbo69 says: Flakes.
Leesie327 says: I don’t know. Maybe Dani believes the lies about us. Lots of people do.
Kimbo69 says: Then they should keep it to themselves.
Leesie327 says: No way I can argue that. Our missionaries go all over the world NOT keeping it to themselves.
Kimbo69 says: What are you going to do if she starts in on you again?
Leesie327 says: Smile and thank her for her concern. I don’t want her angry and bugging Michael. He’s with these people all the time.
Kimbo69 says: Get God to zap her. You’re tight with Him.
Leesie327 says: He’d say I’m supposed to love her.
Kimbo69 says: Hah! You are crazy.
Leesie327 says: Certifiable—crap—there’s noise in the restaurant. Somebody’s in there.
Kimbo69 says: Maybe Jaz came home.
Kimbo69 says: Leesie? Where are you?
Kimbo69 says: Are you okay?
Kimbo69 says: You’re scaring the panties off me.
Kimbo69 says: If you don’t come back and answer me, I’ll never chat with you again.
Leesie327 says: There’s a massive black guy in there scrubbing the counters down. I think it’s Aunty Jaz’s son.
Kimbo69 says: The criminal?
Leesie327 says: No one said he’s a criminal.
Kimbo69 says: Get out of there now!!!!
Leesie327 says: What if Jaz comes home, and he hurts her?
Kimbo69 says: What if he hurts you?
Leesie327 says: I’m going to go out back and call Michael.
Kimbo69 says: Can’t you call someone closer? Like the police? Leesie327 says: Oh, yeah. I wonder if 911 works here. I could try that. President Bodden. I’ll call him. Right after Michael.
Kimbo69 says: Go hide.
Kimbo69 says: Get help from the neighbors.
Kimbo69 says: You’re gone aren’t you?
Kimbo69 says: Crap. girl. You better phone me.
Kimbo69 says: What’s happening? I’m sitting right here. I’m not going anywhere until you tell me you’re okay.
Kimbo69 says: Don’t do anything stupid.
Kimbo69 says: Geeze—now you’ve even got me praying.
MICHAEL’S DIVE LOG – VOLUME 10
Dive Buddy: the whole gang
Date: 07/03
Dive #: --
Location: Grand Cayman
Dive Site: Jaz’s shack
Weather Condition: late, windy
Water Condition: kicking up white caps
Depth: wish I knew
Visibility: zero
Water Temp: weird, I’m cold
Bottom Time: too, too long
Comments:
When I steer the boat close enough to shore to get cell coverage on our way back in from the afternoon trip, I pick up a text from Leesie.
J’s son in rstrnt calling Pres B
Jaz’s son? Do I know Jaz has a son? I think so. What did they say about him? Restraining order? That’s it. He can’t come near his mother. No one ever said why. That’s why I was nervous about Leesie staying there. I forgot all about it as soon as I met Jaz. She’s overpowering. Did he hurt her? Threaten her? Where has he been? Why is he there now? Freak. I think Leesie’s alone.
I dial Leesie. Her phone goes straight to voicemail. She always forgets to charge it. Way to go, babe.
Or maybe the dude turned it off.
I try Jaz’s land line. It’s busy. Off the hook? Cut? Freak. Freak. Freak.
I push the boat into high gear.
I’m working today with Gabriel and Cooper. Alex drove Leesie back to Jaz’s for me while we dove this afternoon.
Cooper yells, “What are you doing? This is a no wake zone.”
“I think Leesie’s in trouble.” I toss him my phone and explain.
Gabriel joins us at the front, catches the gist of the situation. He examines the text. “Who’s Pres B?”
I concentrate on the steering the speeding boat. “The guy from her church.”
Cooper puts his hand on my shoulder. “Calm down then. He’s handling it.”
I shrug him off. “What if he’s not? What if she didn’t call? Or he didn’t pick up? I gotta get over there.”
Gabriel hands back my phone. “We’ll go, too. You might need us.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course, dude.” Cooper slaps my back and yells, “Hang on tight! We’re coming in hot!”
The divers in the back sit down and grab something.
Cooper gets his phone out of his dry bag and starts dialing the guys. He gets a hold of Brock who promises to have Ethan and Seth ready to go as soon as the boat touches the dock.
Gabriel grabs hold of an overhead bar for balance as I slam the boat through the cut in the reef and speed across the flat lagoon to the dock.
Dani’s there to catch the ropes and offload the divers. “Go, go! I’ve got this.”
Gabriel, Cooper and I tear out of the boat and up to the parking lot. Ethan, Seth, Brock, and Alex wait by my car.
Gabriel greets Alex with a hug. “Don’t worry, mi cielo. I’m sure we’ll be fine. See you later.”
Alex glares at him. “Like hell you will.”
“You’re not going.”
“And who’s going to stop me?”
Apparently not Gabriel. All the guys cram into my car, and I take off—heading North. It’s a mile or two longer, but there’s no traffic and the road is open so we can speed. Gabriel and Alex follow in his sleek red Porsche. I wish this bucket I’m driving had that kind of speed.
Ethan’s in the front seat beside me. I chuck my phone at him. “Keep trying to call her.”
The car is silent except for the sound of muted dialing and the obnoxious engine. I grow more and more tense. Grip the steering wheel so hard my knuckles turn white. My arms ache.
“Freak!” A slow car ahead blocks my progress. I pull into the oncoming lane and zoom around it. An approaching car lays on its horn and brakes hard.
“Watch it.” Seth yells as I whip back into my lane and the car I passed starts to honk.
I ignore him and press down on the gas, check the rearview mirror. Gabriel aims his Porsche at the gap in the middle of the road between the slow car and second car coming the other direction. He pulls up close behind me.
I focus on the road ahead. This piece of junk I’m driving shakes too much at 90 mph, so I ease it back to 85—keep it there the whole way.
I screech up to Jaz’s, bail out and sprint around back.
“Leesie?” I yell. “Are you here? Leesie!”
The porch is empty.
The living quarters, too.
I hear noise in the restaurant.
I burst through the door screaming, “Leesie!” with all the guys and Alex at my back.
Leesie and Aunty Jaz sit at a table eating fish.
I turn from them to find a massive black guy with a head full of dreds barreling down on us wielding a fish cleaver.
“No! No!” Leesie leaps up, gets between us. “It’s okay.” She backs hard into me and holds her hands up to ward off the guy. “Didn’t you get my text?”
“That’s why we’re here!” I hold my arms out to keep the guys back.
The fish guy backs off.
Leesie turns around. “Why didn’t you call?”
I grab her shoulders. “I did.” I shake her. “A thousand times.”
“Oh, no.” She sticks her hand in her pocket and pulls out her cell phone. It’s dead. “I didn’t realize. I’m sorry.”
I’m shaking I’m so upset. “I tried the landline, too.” I get a hold of myself, stop shaking her.
“Jaz has been using it.” She grabs my sweaty hands. “I thought you were still on the water.” She peaks around me at all the guys and Alex—fists clenched, panting—ready to defend her. Her face goes crimson. “I’m so, so sorry.”
“Well,” Aunty Jaz pipes up from her table, “now that you’re here, you can help celebrate. Junior’s come back to me—and he’ll make fish for you all.”
Junior smiles like Aunty Jaz. “Of course. Of course. Come in. We’re re-opening the shack tomorrow. You’re our first customers.”
I collapse at a table in the back and slump down on it. Hide my face in my hands. Leesie introduces everyone to Aunty Jaz and Junior.
A few minutes later, Leesie scoots a chair close to mine. She strokes my back. “I can’t believe I put you through that.”
“Freak, babe. It was hell.”
She combs my hair with her fingers. “I didn’t know my phone was dead.”
“You could have sent another text. Or left a phone message.”
“You’re right. I’m so stupid.” Her voice shakes.
I look up. She’s gone really pale. “Are you okay?”
“I am now.” She squirms close.
My arms encircle her. “Were you scared?”
Her head bobs up and down, bangs my chin. “I heard him in the kitchen, got a look—hid out back. Sent you the text. Called President Bodden. He was concerned and told me to stay put until he got here. He was fast—twenty minutes—but it seemed like forever.”
“He showed up by himself?” I rest my cheek on her head. It’s sweaty. Poor, babe.
“One of the members is a cop. He came, too. They told Aunty Jaz to stay put, but she got here about the same time.” Leesie puts her hand on my neck.
I cover it with mine. “They confronted him?”
She shrugs. “They made me stay in the cop car until it was safe.”