~Buddha
I woke with the sun falling across my face. Looking around the room, I tried to remember where I was. My chest tightened and my stomach got queasy until I remembered I’d slept in the hotel suite Gavin and Anali rented for us in Monterey. I wonder how I'd gotten into bed. I remember putting on pajamas and then going to the living room to watch a movie, something with a car chase in it, I think.
I grabbed my stuff and went into the bathroom. First thing I ran saline solution into my eyes to soften the dried-out contacts so I could remove them. I will never fall asleep with my contacts in again, I vowed to my reflection in the mirror.
That's when I noticed I was shut down even more than yesterday. I felt no power humming under my skin, saw no flames in my eyes. I knew other people were in the hotel with me, but I couldn't feel any of them. For a moment I mourned the loss of the Phoenix gifts, but then I smiled. I felt normal. Only my own repressed emotions tugged at my heart. I didn't feel drawn to anyone. I didn't feel overwhelmed. I felt like me again, in a way I hadn't since my birthday.
I guess I did a good job of stuffing my power down. Reaching deep inside, I felt it, the warm spark of my inheritance and destiny. I thought about uncovering the ember and allowing the power to flow through me again, but I didn't want this power. I didn't want to catch fire, or feel other people's emotions, or experience the history of ancient vases. I knew Gavin wanted me as his niece, and I was pretty sure he would keep me even if the powers went away. I could always get them back later, right?
My stomach muscles clenched as I shoved the fire deeper down, ignoring its subtle call to me. Today, I would be me again. I put on my blue jeans and dark blue tee shirt with a silver orchid on the front, a gift from Gavin; he'd bought it for me at the conservatory.
"How are you feeling?" Kayin asked, as I stepped out of the bedroom.
"Good, and you?"
"Good, can I use your bathroom? Gavin's in the other one."
"Sure, I'm done."
"I'll be out in a minute. Gavin and Anali are already up." He shut the bathroom door.
With a smile I went out into the living room.
"Good morning," Anali said cheerfully.
"Good morning. You look nice," I said.
"Thank you," she replied, running her hand over the lavender silk blouse. "I had a pitcher of orange juice sent up if you want some. As soon as Gavin is out of the shower, we'll go and get breakfast."
"Thanks." After getting a tall glass of juice, I walked over to the big glass windows. The sun sparkled off the ocean and otters swam around the patches of floating kelp. "Kayin's up, he got into the shower before I left."
"Oh, Kayin's very quick, he'll be done long before Gavin's ready," Anali replied with a soft smile.
"Morning," Kayin greeted us, as he walked into the room. His skin glowed ebony against the white cotton sweater he wore. "I assume we're waiting on Gavin?"
"Yes, I'll go hurry him along," Anali offered.
"Let me put on my shoes, and we'll take off," Gavin said several minutes later. Sitting down he pulled on dark blue Converse high-tops.
"Cool shoes."
"Yeah," Gavin said, his face about to burst with his smile. "We can get you some if you want."
I thought for a moment watching him lace them up. "Okay."
"Great. We’ll get them as soon as possible."
This was the first time I agreed to anything Gavin offered to buy me. I felt embarrassed by his excitement. "I don't need them."
Gavin snorted. "Not everything is about need. Now let's get breakfast—I'm starving!"
After breakfast we walked down to the beach. Yanking our shoes off, Kayin and I quickly rolled up the legs of our pants. We were eager to get into the water despite the cool winter temperatures.
"Before you two run off I would like Sapphire to practice creating fire. It's important that you learn to control tapping into other people's gifts. There is no one else out here this morning and being near water, we'll all be safe," Gavin said, as he set down a pile of driftwood. "Sit here, and if anyone sees you, they'll think you're making a fire."
Kayin walked over to Gavin, but I wasn't sure I wanted to do this. I didn't want to get caught by the Sons of Belial, or be on fire.
Dragging my feet in the sand, I walked over then plopped down next to Kayin.
"We'll give you two some privacy. Neither of us can help with this," Anali said, grabbing Gavin's arm and dragging him down the beach. Gavin looked like he wanted to stay, but he let Anali drag him away.
"How about this—I'll go through what I focus on to pull up fire slowly step by step, and we'll see if it works for you," Kayin offered.
"Okay," I agreed.
"First close your eyes and take a few deep breaths." Kayin's accented voice was deep and warm.
"Now feel the energy, the power of the Phoenix gifts flowing through you," Kayin guided. I continued to breathe, but I felt nothing.
"Now hold up a hand and imagine small flames dancing on the tips of your fingers." Okay, I could imagine that, I thought, while holding up my left hand.
"I want you to push your gift out onto the tips of your fingers, making the flames real." Well, this wasn't something I could fake. Reaching out I couldn’t feel Kayin’s power at all, so I turned my focus down into my belly. I found the hard sphere of ash. Only warm tendrils of smoke came through. Quickly, I grabbed one and pushed it through my body and out the tips of my fingers. Slowly I opened my eyes, grateful when I saw tiny dancing flames.
"I did it!"
Kayin opened his eyes and leaned forward to get a good look at the tiny flames. "Yes, you did. Now, pull out more power and make them bigger."
Was he kidding? Make them bigger; the bad guys could feel us then. I didn't say anything, and instead pretended to try.
"I can't," I said after a few minutes. I felt bad about lying to Kayin, but I needed to keep us all safe.
"Don't worry about it. You'll get the hang of it. We'll try another way," Kayin assured me.
With a sigh I settled in to try again.
Thirty minutes later nothing changed, all I created was a small pale flame. I knew I was letting Kayin down, but I couldn't let any more energy go. I even tried once, really tried, to let go and pull up more energy, but nothing more came to me.
Kayin's brow wrinkled in confusion. He'd been very patient, but I could tell he felt frustrated. "I don't understand."
"What's wrong?" Gavin asked, startling us both.
"Sapphire is having trouble creating a strong flame," Kayin said.
Gavin cocked his head to the side, his pale green eyes wide with concern. "Sapphire, what's wrong? Maybe we need to take you to a healer?"
"I'm fine." Standing up I brushed the sand off my butt.
"No, you're not fine, you should be having trouble with too much power not a lack of power," Gavin insisted. "We need to figure out what is going on."
"Look, yesterday I felt the most evil thing ever, and in order to protect myself and you, I had to shut down and hide all my power. Now you want me to open back up, to be sensed by the evil lurking out there waiting to steal our energy and our life? I don't think so!" I stormed off down the beach before anyone could respond.
I wiped at the tears running down my face. I hated how much I cried lately, it was another change beyond my control. Finding a group of rocks, I climbed up and stared out into the blue-gray sea.
A few minutes later, the others joined me and we spent an hour searching through tidal pools, poking small sea creatures and pointedly not talking about my outburst.
When we were headed home, Gavin cleared his throat. "I need to talk to the both of you before we get back to San Francisco. I called Philip, and he said after yesterday morning, there were a few walk-ins felt around town, but nothing since then. We think it will be safe, but if you feel the slick, creepy feeling get somewhere safe, and remember to wear your contacts at all times."
"What exactly are walk
-ins? I know we dealt with one before, but you never told us what they are." I couldn't avoid them if I didn't know what they were.
"Walk-ins are spirits loyal to the Sons of Belial. They ‘walk-in’ or possess people to do whatever task they've been sent to do," Anali answered.
"Can they enter anyone?" Kayin asked, reaching over and clasping my hand.
Gavin ran a hand through his hair, making it even messier than the wind off the ocean. "No, they can only enter people who owe the Sons of Belial and their leader a favor."
"Do a lot of people owe him favors?"
"Well," Anali answered slowly, "we don't know. Most of them are basically good people who fell on hard times and someone helped them out. The person gets what they need and only has to promise the Sons of Belial a favor at some point. Then when there is a need, a walk-in takes the person over for a while."
"What if we're seen?" I asked. Kayin squeezed my hand. He seemed as nervous as I was about this threat.
"As long as you have your contacts in walk-ins can't use their magic to track you. They can sense you if they get close enough and will come after you, but once you get away, they can't find you again easily. Walk-ins don’t like the sunlight, it’s harder for them to keep control of the person in the light, so if it's daytime, get outside. They have to see the fire within your eyes to use their powers to hunt you down." Anali tried to make her voice comforting while making sure we understood the seriousness of the situation.
The memory of my mother's scared face as she said good-bye to me flashed in my mind. "Like they hunted my mother and father?"
Gavin's eyes met mine in the rear view mirror. "Yes, like they hunted your mother and father."