Page 124 of The Idiot

bid him, _bid him_, do you hear, _command him_,now, at once, to throw you up, and remain mine for ever? Shall I? Hewill stay, and he will marry me too, and you shall trot home all alone.Shall I?--shall I say the word?” she screamed like a madwoman, scarcelybelieving herself that she could really pronounce such wild words.

  Aglaya had made for the door in terror, but she stopped at thethreshold, and listened. “Shall I turn Rogojin off? Ha! ha! you thoughtI would marry him for your benefit, did you? Why, I’ll call out _now_, ifyou like, in your presence, ‘Rogojin, get out!’ and say to the prince,‘Do you remember what you promised me?’ Heavens! what a fool I have beento humiliate myself before them! Why, prince, you yourself gave me yourword that you would marry me whatever happened, and would never abandonme. You said you loved me and would forgive me all, and--and resp--yes,you even said that! I only ran away from you in order to set you free,and now I don’t care to let you go again. Why does she treat me so--soshamefully? I am not a loose woman--ask Rogojin there! He’ll tell you.Will you go again now that she has insulted me, before your eyes, too;turn away from me and lead her away, arm-in-arm? May you be accursedtoo, for you were the only one I trusted among them all! Go away,Rogojin, I don’t want you,” she continued, blind with fury, and forcingthe words out with dry lips and distorted features, evidently notbelieving a single word of her own tirade, but, at the same time, doingher utmost to prolong the moment of self-deception.

  The outburst was so terribly violent that the prince thought it wouldhave killed her.

  “There he is!” she shrieked again, pointing to the prince and addressingAglaya. “There he is! and if he does not approach me at once and take_me_ and throw you over, then have him for your own--I give him up toyou! I don’t want him!”

  Both she and Aglaya stood and waited as though in expectation, and bothlooked at the prince like madwomen.

  But he, perhaps, did not understand the full force of this challenge; infact, it is certain he did not. All he could see was the poor despairingface which, as he had said to Aglaya, “had pierced his heart for ever.”

  He could bear it no longer, and with a look of entreaty, mingled withreproach, he addressed Aglaya, pointing to Nastasia the while:

  “How can you?” he murmured; “she is so unhappy.”

  But he had no time to say another word before Aglaya’s terrible lookbereft him of speech. In that look was embodied so dreadful a sufferingand so deadly a hatred, that he gave a cry and flew to her; but it wastoo late.

  She could not hold out long enough even to witness his movement in herdirection. She had hidden her face in her hands, cried once “Oh, myGod!” and rushed out of the room. Rogojin followed her to undo the boltsof the door and let her out into the street.

  The prince made a rush after her, but he was caught and held back. Thedistorted, livid face of Nastasia gazed at him reproachfully, and herblue lips whispered:

  “What? Would you go to her--to her?”

  She fell senseless into his arms.

  He raised her, carried her into the room, placed her in an arm-chair,and stood over her, stupefied. On the table stood a tumbler of water.Rogojin, who now returned, took this and sprinkled a little in her face.She opened her eyes, but for a moment she understood nothing.

  Suddenly she looked around, shuddered, gave a loud cry, and threwherself in the prince’s arms.

  “Mine, mine!” she cried. “Has the proud young lady gone? Ha, ha, ha!” she laughed hysterically. “And I had given him up to her! Why--why didI? Mad--mad! Get away, Rogojin! Ha, ha, ha!”

  Rogojin stared intently at them; then he took his hat, and without aword, left the room.

  A few moments later, the prince was seated by Nastasia on the sofa,gazing into her eyes and stroking her face and hair, as he would alittle child’s. He laughed when she laughed, and was ready to cry whenshe cried. He did not speak, but listened to her excited, disconnectedchatter, hardly understanding a word of it the while. No sooner didhe detect the slightest appearance of complaining, or weeping, orreproaching, than he would smile at her kindly, and begin stroking herhair and her cheeks, soothing and consoling her once more, as if shewere a child.

  IX.

  A fortnight had passed since the events recorded in the last chapter,and the position of the actors in our story had become so changed thatit is almost impossible for us to continue the tale without some fewexplanations. Yet we feel that we ought to limit ourselves to the simplerecord of facts, without much attempt at explanation, for a very patentreason: because we ourselves have the greatest possible difficulty inaccounting for the facts to be recorded. Such a statement on our partmay appear strange to the reader. How is anyone to tell a story which hecannot understand himself? In order to keep clear of a false position,we had perhaps better give an example of what we mean; and probably theintelligent reader will soon understand the difficulty. More especiallyare we inclined to take this course since the example will constitute adistinct march forward of our story, and will not hinder the progress ofthe events remaining to be recorded.

  During the next fortnight--that is, through the early part of July--thehistory of our hero was circulated in the form of strange, diverting,most unlikely-sounding stories, which passed from mouth to mouth,through the streets and villas adjoining those inhabited by Lebedeff,Ptitsin, Nastasia Philipovna and the Epanchins; in fact, prettywell through the whole town and its environs. All society--both theinhabitants of the place and those who came down of an evening for themusic--had got hold of one and the same story, in a thousand varietiesof detail--as to how a certain young prince had raised a terriblescandal in a most respectable household, had thrown over a daughter ofthe family, to whom he was engaged, and had been captured by a woman ofshady reputation whom he was determined to marry at once--breaking offall old ties for the satisfaction of his insane idea; and, in spite ofthe public indignation roused by his action, the marriage was to takeplace in Pavlofsk openly and publicly, and the prince had announced hisintention of going through with it with head erect and looking the wholeworld in the face. The story was so artfully adorned with scandalousdetails, and persons of so great eminence and importance wereapparently mixed up in it, while, at the same time, the evidence was socircumstantial, that it was no wonder the matter gave food for plenty ofcuriosity and gossip.

  According to the reports of the most talented gossip-mongers--those who,in every class of society, are always in haste to explain every eventto their neighbours--the young gentleman concerned was of good family--aprince--fairly rich--weak of intellect, but a democrat and a dabblerin the Nihilism of the period, as exposed by Mr. Turgenieff. He couldhardly talk Russian, but had fallen in love with one of the MissEpanchins, and his suit met with so much encouragement that he had beenreceived in the house as the recognized bridegroom-to-be of the younglady. But like the Frenchman of whom the story is told that he studiedfor holy orders, took all the oaths, was ordained priest, and nextmorning wrote to his bishop informing him that, as he did not believein God and considered it wrong to deceive the people and live upon theirpockets, he begged to surrender the orders conferred upon him the daybefore, and to inform his lordship that he was sending this letter tothe public press,--like this Frenchman, the prince played a false game.It was rumoured that he had purposely waited for the solemn occasion ofa large evening party at the house of his future bride, at which he wasintroduced to several eminent persons, in order publicly to make knownhis ideas and opinions, and thereby insult the “big-wigs,” and to throwover his bride as offensively as possible; and that, resisting theservants who were told off to turn him out of the house, he had seizedand thrown down a magnificent china vase. As a characteristic additionto the above, it was currently reported that the young prince reallyloved the lady to whom he was engaged, and had thrown her over out ofpurely Nihilistic motives, with the intention of giving himself thesatisfaction of marrying a fallen woman in the face of all the world,thereby publishing his opinion that there is no distinction betweenvirtuous and disreputab
le women, but that all women are alike, free; anda “fallen” woman, indeed, somewhat superior to a virtuous one.

  It was declared that he believed in no classes or anything else,excepting “the woman question.”

  All this looked likely enough, and was accepted as fact by most of theinhabitants of the place, especially as it was borne out, more or less,by daily occurrences.

  Of course much was said that could not be determined absolutely. Forinstance, it was reported that the poor girl had so loved her futurehusband that she had followed him to the house of the other woman, theday after she had been thrown over; others said that he had insisted onher coming, himself, in order to shame and insult her by his taunts andNihilistic confessions when she reached the house. However allthese things might be, the public interest in the matter grewdaily, especially as it became clear that the scandalous wedding wasundoubtedly to take place.

  So that if our readers were to ask an explanation, not of the wildreports about the prince’s Nihilistic opinions, but simply as