He held the kitten and walked over to Daniela, waving Rampage around like he was flying. Rampage didn’t seem to mind. “Raaaammmmmpppaaaagggggggeeee!”
He tried to set Rampage onto Daniela’s head, still holding onto him, but Daniela shot up and ran away. Hunter chased after her laughing. “Rampage is going to get you!” he yelled then turned to Rampage and softened his tone. “Aren’t you Rampage?”
Rampage meowed and we all laughed. He looked a little annoyed that he was flying instead of sleeping.
Gary came over while we were waiting for the water to boil, then he helped the kittens. Daniela eventually braved the potential for kitten poop and fed one of the cats too. She came away poop free. Gary wasn’t so lucky, but he was a champ about it.
The whole evening ended up being a very pleasant time. Hanging out with the three of them was so comfortable and fun in a non-stressful way. I was beginning to look forward to enjoying the rest of the semester with both old and new friends.
Chapter Fourteen
CUPID
The beginning of February came and went. Before anyone knew it, we were at that dreaded mid-February holiday. I sat at a table by myself on the second floor of the Barnyard looking idly over the railing at the bustle of student activity below, trying not to gag from seeing all pink and red Valentine’s Day decorations around me. I’d finished my lunch and was waiting for Daniela to meet me after class.
I spotted her in jeans and a forest-green sherpa jacket through the fifty-foot glass windows long before she reached the entrance. I waved to her and she came up the stairs with a smile. “Hey girl, what’s wrong?” she said, setting her backpack down and taking a seat across from me. “You don’t look so hot.”
“Yeah, sorry. I’m just allergic to Valentine’s Day.”
Daniela flipped her sandy-blonde hair back and removed her jacket. “I know what you mean. Valentine’s Day is lame.” She put her finger up. “Hold on, I’m starving. Lemme get some food first. Otherwise, my belly’s gonna revolt.” I waited a few minutes and she came back with a tray containing a large cheeseburger topped with all the fixings and a huge plate of fries.
I noticed that we were the only two people in the cafeteria not wearing a shade of red. It was kind of surprising that Daniela wasn’t decked out in hearts and arrows, actually.
“You know Daniela, I was kind of expecting you to be wearing a pink tutu and one of those heart shaped tiara’s on your head.”
She scrunched her face at me. “Meanie. Just because I wanted to celebrate Valentine’s Day in style two years ago doesn’t mean that I feel the same way about it now.”
I raised an eyebrow, skeptical. “Really? What’s changed?”
She shrugged, “Valentine’s Day is just a construct of the media-entertainment complex, designed to keep the poor girl down.”
Whatever answer I was expecting from her, it wasn’t that. “Uh . . . what?”
She looked at me waving the fry in her hand for emphasis. “Think about it. The entire day is designed to make you feel shitty if you’re single. It’s even worse if you’re seeing someone, because then you feel obligated to spend money.”
“Um, I take it things aren’t going well with Cody?”
“Cody is old news,” she puffed then rolled her eyes. “Turns out he was a total loser. You win some, you lose some.” She shrugged then dipped a fry into a dish of ketchup.
“You don’t seem too broken up about it.”
“You know how it is, easy-come, easy-go.”
She didn’t seem too eager to talk about it, so I didn’t ask her to elaborate. A few tables behind Daniela, a bulky guy in a tight frat t-shirt was going around table to table with a basket in his hand. After chatting with a group of starry-eyed freshman, he started coming our way. He got to our table and smiled at Daniela, his cheeks dimpling. A red heart had been painted on his left cheekbone.
“Hey, ladies, want to buy some chocolates for your Valentines? P-K-D is raising money for heart disease.”
Phi Kappa Delta? Wasn’t that Gary’s frat?
Daniela finished chewing her mouthful of cheeseburger, before wiping the corner of her mouth daintily with a paper napkin. She looked up at him, her eyes glinting mischievously. Uh-oh. That was her tiger-stalking-her-prey look. I had a feeling I was about to get a demonstration of “easy-come”. I leaned back, looking forward to the show.
“Hey cutie, what’s your name?” she said, batting her eyes at him.
Nice Daniela, real subtle.
The guy licked his lips before answering. “Jeff. I’m Jeff.”
“Hi Jeff, I’m Daniela, and this is Lorrie. Unfortunately, us two ladies don’t have Valentines to give chocolates to. Now I might be interested in getting some chocolates for myself, but . . . I think I’ll need a little extra sweetness with my chocolate.”
He stared at her dumbly. “Uh . . . you can sprinkle some extra sugar on top of them I guess.”
I rolled my eyes and shot a look at Daniela. Was she serious? What could she possibly see in this guy besides his dimples and muscles?
Daniela put her hand in front of her mouth and mock whispered to him, “Put your number on the wrapper and I’ll buy one from you.”
The frat guy scrunched his brow, seeming to consider it for a second, before realizing that he was being hit on. His eyes suddenly lit up in realization, and he nodded quickly with a smile.
“Yeah, oh yeah. Okay.” He scribbled something on one of the chocolate bars before handing it to Daniela. She rummaged a dollar out of her purse and handed it to him with a wink.
After the guy walked away to a different table, we both erupted in giggles.
“Oh my god Daniela, you’re impossible! You were just telling me about how you hated Valentine’s Day!”
“I still hate Valentine’s Day, but that doesn’t mean I can’t use it to my advantage.” She picked up her burger again, taking another big bite.
I shook my head still laughing softly. “So are you going to call him?” I asked her.
She chewed thoughtfully. “Maybe, I don’t know yet. I like to keep my options open. Besides, what if someone hotter comes along selling flowers before the end of the day?”
I wanted to say something back to her, but the alarm on my phone played its melody reminding me that it was time to feed the kittens.
“That’s the sound of kittens crying for their Mommy,” I said, turning off the alarm and putting my phone back into my pocket.
“Feeding time at Hunter’s?”
“Yep.”
“Hey you know, what if Hunter was your Valentine? Or if you were his? I know you guys have been pretty chummy lately taking care of the kittens and all.” She nudged me.
I rolled my eyes. “There’s only one problem: there’s nothing romantic going on between us. Also, what happened to you warning me to be careful around Hunter?”
“I’ve been brainwashed by the Hunter-bad-boy complex,” she confessed. “Behind his reputation, he’s actually been a good guy. I’m thinking I misjudged him.”
“Yeah, I might’ve misjudged him as well—although being friends with him has had its rough spots, it hasn’t been the trouble I thought it’d be.”
“Have you considered moving further with him?”
“Eh . . . we’re two friends jointly caring for six furry babies. We could be Valentine’s Day Buddies but that wouldn’t be true to Saint Valentine’s spirit. It’d be like if you took your brother to prom as your date.”
Daniela opened her mouth and put a finger inside to simulate gagging. “Yuck! On the other hand, if my brother looked like Hunter. . .” She grinned. “I’m not going to say what would happen but I’ll just suggest that there might be some incest going on in the Stauffer household.”
“Ewww. Aren’t there laws against that?”
“Not even the law can stop love,” she said playfully.
“What about your parents? Knowing your dad, he’d probably kick the both of you out of the house. Lack
of a home can certainly stop love.”
“Well, of course the hypothetical Hunter Stauffer and I would keep our relationship on the down-low. On the outside, we’d seem like a normal brother and sister pair; we may or may not kiss each other on the lips in public—depends on social norms. Beyond that though, society wouldn’t be ready to accept us.”
“Okay, well Hunter is basically like an older brother to me. And I hate to disappoint you by not jumping on the incest train but I ain’t a ‘ho that has sex with her bro’.” I nudged her back.
“Whatever,” she scoffed as if I was acting pretentious then took a sip of her drink.
“Besides, I’m sure Hunter has his pick of Valentines. Girls probably give him roses and chocolates instead of the other way around. It’s not hard to believe considering you’d go as far as to break state laws for him.”
She laughed. “I was just joshin ya, Lorrie. Hunter’s all yours.” She gave an exaggerated wink that made me uncomfortable. “But you’re probably right about girls wanting to woo him. Anyway, it’s fun to dream about opportunities that’ll never arise.”
“Maybe. But it’s also fun just being buddies.”
“To each, her own. Anyway, I don’t want to keep you from the kids. I’ll see you back at the dorms.”
I left the Barnyard feeling better about Valentine’s Day. Despite the odd direction the conversation took, it raised my spirit. Somehow Daniela always knew how to make me feel more upbeat. The walk across campus to Hunter’s place was quick, even with the two inches of snow crunching beneath my boots. When I reached his apartment, I unlocked the door, and stamped my boots on the welcome mat.
I could hear the kittens meowing already in their box so I quickly opened the fridge for the formula and started heating it up. I spent the next half hour feeding them. It wouldn’t have taken so long if Taylor hadn’t kept trying to climb out of the box after she had already been fed. They were already growing so big, I could barely hold their entire bodies in my hands.
The six little monsters finally fell asleep in their box, and I started cleaning up. Just then, Hunter came through the front door.
“Hey Lorrie, Happy Valentine’s Day!” I heard him yell as he came in.
Shit, I almost forgot. If it was Valentine’s Day, Hunter might have brought a girl back. My heart beat faster. How awkward would it be to meet his Valentine? I turned around quickly, blood rushing to my face, but it was only Hunter standing in the doorway, letting in a blast of winter air.
He was wearing a black sweatshirt and thick sweatpants: he must’ve just come back from the gym. I let out a slow breath of relief. He wasn’t with anyone.
“Hey Hunter. Don’t even remind me.”
“Oh, okay. I don’t really care, but I figured girls liked Valentine’s Day. How are the kittens?”
“Just fed ‘em, they’re all sleeping now.”
He walked through the apartment to his bedroom. When he emerged again, he was shirtless. His body glistened with a thin sheen of sweat sending an unwelcome surge of awareness through me.
“Come on Hunter, do you always need to show off your muscles?”
He laughed, “Hey sorry, I wanted to get out of my sweaty clothes ASAP. You have any Valentine’s Day plans?”
“Why? Are you trying to ask me to be your Valentine?” I crossed my arms, ready for whatever he was going to try to throw at me next. It would be difficult to top being half-naked, but I wouldn’t put it past him.
Hunter held his hands up in surrender. “Whoa whoa, slow down there Lorrie. I was just going to ask if you wanted to stick around and hang out. Gary is coming over in a bit. We were just going to have some beers and watch TV.”
I wasn’t expecting Hunter to be lacking dates for Valentine’s Day so I was surprised that he wasn’t going out.
“Really? You’re hanging out with Gary on Valentine’s? Are you sure there’s nothing going on between you two?” I teased him.
He smirked at me.“Well you’ll have to stick around if you want to find out. So what do you say?”
I giggled at the thought of the two of them wrestling naked like ancient Greek combatants. “Sure. Sounds like fun.”
Hunter went into the bathroom to take his shower, and I plopped down on the couch to watch TV. Bridezillas was on—an appropriate show for the occasion. I watched the brides for a while, but I couldn’t stop thinking about why Hunter wasn’t going out for a date on Valentine’s Day.
After he finished his shower, he walked over to the couch. He was wearing a tight white t-shirt and a new pair of gray sweatpants. His hammer tattoo peeked out beneath his sleeve when he took a seat beside me and my heart did a pitter patter. I wanted to shift further away on the couch but I was already squeezed against the armrest.
“What are you watching?” he asked, his eyes fixed on the TV.
“Bridezillas.”
He remained silent while watching a group of bridesmaids console the bride who was crying over being unable to squeeze into her dress on the last fitting because she had gained weight from tasting too many wedding cake options.
“You like this kinda stuff?” he asked casually.
“Uh, yeah!” I chimed.
He continued watching, seemingly mesmerized. “Why?”
“It’s a guilty pleasure. It’s like you know it’s bad, but you can’t stop watching. It’s kind of like watching a train wreck.”
He hummed to himself in thought as the bride began sucking on her thumb like a toddler to ease her anxiety. “Yeah, I can see the appeal. I wanna stop watching but I’m not sure I can. You think you’d ever be like that?”
“What? No. No way. I’d be way more reasonable . . . I think.”
“You think?”
“Well, they say there’s a ‘Bridezilla’ in everyone. I’d like to think I’m better than that but it’s easy to believe you’re better until you’re actually put into a similarly stressful situation. A lot of people enjoy watching trashy reality shows because deep down it makes us feel good about ourselves. But maybe we’ve all been lying to ourselves and Bridezillas is a true reflection of human nature.”
“That’s deep,” he said softly.
We sat together in silence, watching the show and pondering the philosophical implications of Bridezillas.
During a commercial break, Hunter shrugged then went to the kitchen and came back to the couch with a large heart-shaped box in his hands.
My pulse skipped a beat. “Is that . . . for me?”
He narrowed his brows and looked at me funny. After pausing for a second, a light flashed across his eyes, and he grinned mischievously. “. . . Maybe.”
“No, it’s not,” I said, realizing the ruse. “Dude, did you forget it was Valentine’s Day already?” I asked, annoyed that he led me to assume he got me a V-Day present.
Hunter ran his hand through his wet hair and a few drops of water fell onto his shirt, forming dark spots. I caught a faint trace of his body wash and it smelled really good. As weird as it was, I found he smelled equally good sweaty as he did fresh.
“My stomach forgot.” He opened the box, picked out a chocolate and popped it into his mouth. “Mmm yummy. Nothing like some post-workout carbs.” He chewed a few times then handed me the open box. “Want one?” he said, his mouth full.
Just looking at the assortment of chocolates made my mouth salivate, dimly reminding me of Pavlov’s slobbering dog from psychology class. Thanks to Daniela’s joke at the beginning of the semester, I couldn’t remember the real reason Pavlov’s dog was famous. “Are you sure I can have one?”
“Sure, of course. I can’t eat ‘em all myself anyway. Someone gave them to me this morning.”
“Who gave them to you?” I asked curiously, pinching a circle-shaped milk chocolate with an almond on top.
“This girl came up to me in the Barnyard, gave me a box of chocolates, and invited herself over. I said no but kept the box of chocolates.” He popped another caramel-drizzled candy in his mouth and contin
ued chewing. “Mmm soo good.”
“I’ve seen a proposition for a threesome and now a chocolate bribe.” I thought about the sordid implications. “Have you ever thought of becoming a male gigolo instead of a fighter? You could make some good money.”
“Nah, I don’t often get material bribes. It’s one of the perks of Valentine’s Day,” he said casually. “Besides, I don’t like the idea of being used for sex, so being a gigolo is out of the question.”
I wrinkled my forehead. “But you’re okay with using girls for sex?”
“No, I’m not okay with that. Like I said before, I’m always upfront about the arrangement.”
“I see.”
We continued eating chocolates for a minute, wet chewing noises filling the silence between us. It still made me uncomfortable to think about Hunter getting a blowjob from two girls.
“Speaking of receiving V-Day gifts,” he said. “Don’t you have guys doing the same to you? You know, random guys coming up to you and giving you chocolates? I thought that was what Valentine’s Day was all about.”
I groaned at his teasing. “I hate to break it to you, Hunter, but I’m not exactly as popular with the opposite sex as you are.”
“Hmm? Why not?”
“I don’t know. You’re the guy, you tell me.”
“I don’t see why you wouldn’t be popular with guys. You certainly are—” He looked me up and down. “—titillating. Have you had a boyfriend before?”
Feeling comfortable enough with Hunter to discuss my dating history, I gave him an honest answer. “Yes, I’ve had a boyfriend before. Well, three to be exact.”
His eyes widened. “Three?”
“Yeah, why does that come as such a surprise? Are you showing your true opinion, that you really think I’m unpopular?”
He swallowed the contents in his mouth and got started on a third piece. “No, I just don’t really like hearing you’ve been with other guys. I’m a little jealous, that’s all.” He smiled at me and rubbed my thigh briefly.
I laughed at the thought of Hunter being jealous. “Yeah, sure,” I said sarcastically, affectionately slapping his thigh in return. It was hard to tell if he was teasing or being serious. “Fortunately, you have nothing to be jealous about. I’m single on Valentine’s Day. Yay!”