“Oh my gosh! How have you gone through life without lobster?! Okay, that’s it! Tonight, we’re going out for a lobster dinner. If you get out of this town without tasting it, I’ll be almost as ashamed as I would be if you drowned.”
I smiled. He didn’t do much talking on the boat; he was pretty focused on his work. And I was pretty focused on him. As the sun climbed higher, the day got hotter, and he took off his shirt. It’s not like I hadn’t seen plenty of guys without their shirts on before, but there’s something different about it being someone you really like. And he was doing a lot of lifting and pulling. When he pulled the traps out of the Ocean, water would splash around, dripping down his chest. I honestly tried not to stare, but I couldn’t help it. He looked gorgeous.
When I wasn’t ogling Akinli, I soaked up the moment, not worrying about its eventual end. I enjoyed the sun here in Akinli’s boat, in Akinli’s clothes, in Akinli’s presence. And, while he didn’t say it in so many words, I was fully looking forward to my first date. I knew I should be more guarded, but I couldn’t keep up the show anymore. I wanted Akinli. So, when he took my hand on the walk home that afternoon, I didn’t bother putting up any kind of fight.
Ben was still gone when we came home for our very late lunch. Julie had already called the police that morning. No leads. Big surprise! When Akinli mentioned he was taking me out for dinner that night, Julie nearly exploded with excitement. She asked if she could dress me up. There was no way to say no to that kind of enthusiasm.
That afternoon, she took me under her wing. I showered and washed my hair at her command. I felt bad though; all the soap in the world wouldn’t wash the saltiness out of my skin. She proceeded to do my hair and makeup.
“You really don’t need any of this; you’re a natural beauty. And the lone restaurant in town doesn’t have a dress code, but let me play anyway, okay? I live with two boys,” she said.
I nodded. I was pleased to have her speak to me at all. She had disappeared after I arrived and was gone most of the day before. Her kindness to me this morning had been so unexpected. Julie’s thoughts were in the same place.
“I’m sorry if I seemed rude when you got here. I was sort of worried about having a stranger in the house, and I got scared a little. But I’ve been thinking of how you must be feeling. You can’t speak, you don’t remember anything, you don’t really know where you are, and you’re depending on complete strangers right now. And, if that isn’t enough, you get assaulted in our house.” She sighed at the memory. “You’ve had a lot to deal with, and I’m sorry I didn’t get that.”
I smiled up at her in the mirror. We were in her bedroom— the boys had been banished. Ben showed up a short while ago, only to have Akinli steal the freshly repaired car and bolt from the house. If he took the car, I had to assume he left the town as well. I couldn’t imagine that there wasn’t anyone or anything here that wasn’t in walking distance.
Julie was intent on turning me into a beauty queen, and it was just the two of us now. I thought that maybe Julie and I could have been friends. If I was some average girl moving into town, she would be someone I wanted to know. I was glad that she was taking to me so warmly, even with my oddities. Almost as warmly as Akinli. I still wasn’t sure where Ben stood. I had worried that my inability to speak would make them all uncomfortable around me. But it was starting to have the opposite effect. Seen as the outcome of a horrific experience, they were endeared to me by my silence. And since most people are never actually listened to enough, my condition turned me into a set of waiting ears, a friend.
“I’ve gotta’ tell you, I haven’t seen Akinli so upbeat in ages. I don’t know how much he’s told you, but he’s had a rough couple of months.”
I nodded my head.
“So he told you? Well, that seems about right, he’s pretty open. When his parents died, he took it really hard. He was just so low, and that’s not in his nature. He gets that from his parents— they were some of the nicest people I’ve ever known. Ben and I used to go down to see them all the time. That house was just the warmest place to be. The three of them were so close; they didn’t really argue the way some families do… I really wish you had met them.”
So did I.
“Sometimes when his mom was really bad, he’d come up here and spend the night. He hated being away from her, but he just couldn’t cry in front of her. Knew it would break her heart, and he didn’t want her feeling guilty. Ben’s the closest thing Akinli has to a brother. And I guess he would consider me a sister now. I hope so.”
I was glad the fondness Akinli had for Julie was reciprocated.
“He had been bracing himself for a long time. She managed to hold on longer than any of the doctors imagined, but she was still getting worse. And then the accident happened. He was a wreck. Blamed himself, said he should have been there. You can see how he is— always thinking of others. He just started sinking. So we told him he could stay with us if he wanted. We had the room. We didn’t really need much help with the boat, but I’m glad he came. And it works out now. Honestly, I’m glad Evan is gone. I hate that he did that to you, but I’m so glad he’s out. I’ve been worried about his temper for years, but he and Ben had known each other for so long. I just never wanted to say anything…”
I thanked my lucky stars that when Evan did finally go after a girl he ran into my unshakable body instead of Julie’s.
“Don’t tell Ben I said that, okay?”
I smiled and gave her a pointed look.
“Oh yeah… who are you going to tell anything to?” She smiled.
“Well, like I was saying, he decided to move up here with us, which was good. I think Akinli likes being with family. I’m pretty sure he wants to have a big one himself one day. And now that he’s here, I just couldn’t imagine life without him. But, ohhhh, his girlfriend…”
My eyes widened. Girlfriend?
“She threw a hissy fit. She didn’t want him to move, and she gave him hell about it. Went on and on about the distance, but, for goodness sake, they still live in the same state! It’s only a couple of hours, but she made it sound like he was moving across the country. And I couldn’t believe she’d be so hard on him after everything.
“They’d been together forever. She stuck with him when he had to drop out of school— told him he could always go back. And then when his mom started getting really weak, she brought food and would visit on the weekends. You know, I think that did his mom a world of good, to see that he had someone who was serious about him. They were really good together. Or so we thought.” Julie sighed.
“She made it through the funeral and even played hostess so Akinli didn’t have to lift a finger. Two weeks later, when he decided he was going to come up here to live with us and work on the boat, she lost it. Said she’d done all this work for him and he was abandoning her. The poor boy just needed to get out of there. Personally, I think she thought he’d go right back to school. Akinli is really smart. He reads all the time, and when the guys decide to have a discussion, he’s always the one who shuts things up because he’s the only one who knows what he’s talking about. I don’t think she wanted to settle for a fisher. Well, she told him to go ahead and go, and that was it,” she concluded.
I guess Julie assumed Akinli would have already mentioned all this. I wondered if there was an opportunity for it somewhere, and I had made it pass somehow. In truth, when it was just the two of us, that was all I thought about: him and me.
I couldn’t bother to be jealous of this girl. I was too shocked. I wouldn’t care if Akinli picked up trash with his bare hands for a living. Or dug ditches. Scrubbed floors on his knees. He was the best and kindest of men. And what kind of person holds your grief against you? All of that work and time, just for her to drop him in the end. I hated this girl. I felt a little guilty because I was glad she was gone. And I knew her absence hurt him.
“He’s been w
orking really hard. Sometimes I think he’s just going through the motions. Every once in a while he comes out of it and acts like himself. Most days he’s just quiet. But he’s been much more like himself since you came. I think a night out will do him good.” She smiled at me.
“You’re gonna’ look so gorgeous!” Julie squealed. I couldn’t help but smile.
Julie and I were about the same size, so while she let me try on all of her clothes, I put her in my sea foam dress. I wrote down that I thought I had messed it up and that it was bound to fall apart now, but that she should keep it until it did. I secretly hoped a formal occasion would present itself in the next few weeks. She really looked lovely in it.
We made a mess of her room, but it was so much fun. We finally decided on a red dress that reminded me of the cherry dress I had in the 50s. It was the same shape— sleeveless and fitted through the waist where it fluffed out and fell just below my knees. And this girl was prepared; I had red heels to match. I loved the look of it; the red really looked good with my brown hair and eyes. I wore those sea foam dresses all the time, but I wasn’t sure I’d ever felt sexier than I did right now.
I didn’t have much experience with makeup, but Julie was a master. She managed to make my eyes look deeper, my lashes look longer, and my lips look fuller. My hair she had curled and pinned up in places so a few tendrils fell around my face in a way that looked accidental, but was completely choreographed. I felt like I belonged in a photograph.
Finally, when she was done dolling me up, she opened the door to hand me over. Julie kept making tiny, happy sounds and grinned from ear to ear. I peeked into Akinli’s room across the hall. I hadn’t looked in there yet. His room was tidy except for a bunch of shirts that had been haphazardly piled at the foot of his bed— the rejects from whatever he decided to wear tonight. His bed was made. Baseball hats hung on the wall. There were a few pictures, but it was too dark to make out the faces. He wasn’t there.
I walked downstairs with Julie trailing at a distance and found him pacing in the kitchen. I could see him as he crossed in front of the doorway twice with his head down. On his third pass, he looked up and saw me with a double take. I could tell he was pleased with what he saw, but I was too busy taking him in to blush. He wore loose khaki pants with his white button up shirt tucked in. He had his sleeves rolled up, and I noticed a leather bracelet on his left wrist. He looked clean and tough at the same time. I was starting to sense that was his style.
“Hey there, Kahlen,” Ben called from the couch. Then he did a wolf whistle, and I rolled my eyes.
Akinli shot him a look that silenced him. I was still on the bottom step of the stairs when he reached out, taking both of my hands in his. I felt warmth flood my body. “Let’s get outta’ here.”
“Have a great time,” Julie called. I didn’t look back, but I felt the smile in her voice. I couldn’t feel the floor.
On the driveway, Akinli turned and stopped me. He still had my hand in his. He looked like he changed his mind as he was standing there. Whatever he was going to say flew out of his head, and he just stared at me for a minute.
“You look absolutely beautiful,” he said.
I ducked my head. He cleared his throat.
“Okay. Well, the restaurant’s only about five blocks away. You’ve seen it’s a small town. So I thought I would let you pick the mode of transportation. Option A is Ben’s smelly car.” He motioned to a blue Honda shinning dully in the moonlight. “Option B is my sweet Moped.” He pointed to a little silver bike by the side of the house. “And Option C is our feet.” He pointed to his legs.
Cars were old news to me. Nothing was going to top joyriding with my sisters. And walking was fine, but I didn’t usually wear heels. What if I stumbled while we walked? Hmm, I thought, maybe he’d carry you again. That’d be fine with me. Or, I managed, he could think you look like a klutz.
I picked the bike. When I pointed, he bounced on his heels a little.
“I was hoping you’d pick Bessie.”
Bessie? He saw the amused look on my face.
“Every good ride has a name. Ships do, cars do. And Bessie here has been good to me. Haven’t you girl?” He petted the seat lovingly. I smiled. “Do you want to meet her?”
I nodded. He started petting her handlebars, and I did the same. He laughed.
“You’re the most laid back girl I’ve ever met.”
Me? Laid back? I lived in an unknown world of stress. He was the laid back one; his personality just rubbed off on me. He took my hand and helped me get on. I was instantly pleased with my choice. The seat was long enough for two, but just barely. We had to get close, and it was a good excuse to hold onto him. The car wouldn’t let me do that. I pressed my chest into his back, feeling our legs fit into place very close together. I wrapped my arms around his chest and could just barely feel his heartbeat under my palm. He turned old Bessie on. She made a pathetic noise.
“Listen to that kitten purr!” he yelled.
I just shook my head. As we drove away, I looked over and saw Ben and Julie’s faces looking out the window. I was suddenly nervous about all four of our expectations for the evening. How similar or different could they be?
CHAPTER 9
After years of jettisoning through the Sea, I figured I had a fair chance of understanding the joy fish and sharks and dolphins feel as they swim in open water. But here, going possibly less than thirty-five miles per hour on Akinli’s bike, I thought I understood what it meant to fly, too. The wind picked up my hair, and it whipped behind me happily. Julie’s red dress was fluttering in the small breeze. I pulled close to Akinli, as bold as anything, feeling the joy of true freedom.
Swimming was an action; flying was a feeling.
In this small moment, I was where I wanted to be and doing what I wanted to do with the one person I wanted to be with. Had I ever been able to make such a decision on my own? Had there ever been a time when either my family or the Ocean hadn’t given me some sort of limitation?
I wanted to tell Akinli I was happy. I was sad I couldn’t say it, but I refused to let anything ruin my very first date. I didn’t know how to date. I hadn’t gotten that far when I was human, and I certainly never allowed myself to be this close to a man as a siren. I had seen enough movies to have a rough idea of how to behave. I hoped he’d blame any missteps on my part on my fuzzy memory and not me.
The ride was too short. I was looking forward to going wherever we were going, but I liked having an excuse to be so close to him. Akinli parked Bessie on the edge of the row of cars by the concrete barrier. He stood and held out stable hands for me as I rose, trying to be ladylike with my dress. Once I fluffed any wrinkles out of my borrowed ensemble, Akinli hooked my arm around his and led the way.
When he walked me towards the restaurant, I thought he was taking me out to the boat again. Surely there was nothing else here. We walked through cars, behind a building, and stopped in front of a screen door. He held it open for me, and I skeptically walked inside.
This restaurant was so small! If he hadn’t shown it to me, I don’t think I would have ever noticed its presence. It looked like it was a storage shed and had to be about the size of Akinli’s living room. Down the middle ran a bar with the kitchen behind it, open for everyone to see. The other half was filled with tables and chairs and benches, and they were packed with happy, chattering customers. We were definitely overdressed. A couple of heads looked up at our entrance and lingered on me. I was used to that type of reaction from men, but I was here with someone. Didn’t they see that? I ignored them and looked at the decorations instead. It looked nautical, of course, like the rest of the town. Some of the same buoys that were in the water were tacked to the walls with nets draped everywhere. It was peculiar, but pleasant.
A waitress walked up to us.
“Hey there, Akinli,” she greeted. “Looking sharp.”
&n
bsp; “Hey, Megan. Megan, this is Kahlen. She’s being introduced to the wonderful world of lobster tonight. How long for a table for two?”
“In here? A while. Still the busy season, you know that. You should have made reservations earlier today.”
“I see then. Well, if you could set up a few crates for us by the sink back there. Is that non-smoking? That’ll be fine.”
She laughed. “Hold on a second.” As Megan walked away, I noticed she had an engagement ring on her finger. Thank goodness. Didn’t Akinli realize how charming he could be? She poked her head out of a screen door opposite to the one we entered and looked around. She looked back at us and smiled and motioned for us to follow her.
Outside, the pier was covered in picnic tables. The restaurant was microscopic, but surely I would have noticed all these tables? I guess I was a little distracted this morning. As we walked, I noticed a bathtub full of lobster. How funny! Dinner swimming right there on the dock. Most of the picnic tables were full, but some smaller tables were open. Megan led us to one of those tiny, round tables just big enough for two. We were right against the railing of the dock, and I could see the outlines of all the islands in the distance.
“I hope you like your lobster,” Megan said, leaving us with our menus.
Akinli went to work immediately. I was already seated, but he took his chair and brought it around the table so he was close to me. He piled the menus, apparently intending for us to share. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a pen and a small blue notebook with a flower in the corner. It was new.
“The lobster is a must, okay? But if you see something else you want to try, just point to it, and I’ll order for both of us.”
It struck me then that he had thought this entire thing out. He knew I wouldn’t be able to order on my own, so he wanted to sit close by. Taking bunches of paper would have been obnoxious, so he bought me a notebook. And even that detail had traces of serious thought to it. It was blue, my favorite color, and feminine with its delicate little flower. Somewhere between him actually asking me to dinner and Ben coming home, he had figured it all out. If we were going on a date, this was how to make it work.