Chapter 5
Finding Myself
Walking through school, I no longer feel myself. Not since I heard the news. I feel like a part of me was ripped out and left there, in the hospital. All I have now are the memories of a past where everything was easy. I’m thankful for every minute I get to spend with my mother now, but I don’t want to think about the future. Not anymore. I don’t want to wish I had more time with her.
When I open my locker to take out my books, I accidentally drop my jacket. A note drifts out of the back pocket and lands on the floor. I pick it up and notice it’s not anything like the material I’m used to. It almost looks like toilet paper, that’s how soft it is.
I unwrap it. There’s something scribbled on the paper.
“I don’t know your name, and you don’t know mine, but it doesn’t matter, since I wouldn’t remember it anyway. What matters is the friendly advice I have for you. I would never let any guy treat you like that. Nor should you. You deserve better. Love - a Stranger.”
Frowning, I turn the paper around, but there’s nothing else on there. I wonder what it means. It looks like a guy’s handwriting. Is he talking about Dave? And if so, how does he know?
So many questions, and I have no answers to them, which frustrates me to no end. However, he’s right. This note has gotten me thinking about my situation. Life is too short to let anyone treat you badly, so I don’t intend on letting something like that happen ever again.
I crumple the paper and put it in my back pocket, unsure of what to do with it. I don’t want to lose it, though, it’s a good reminder for me to keep my focus on what’s important in life.
As I walk into class, people start laughing and giggling, but I couldn’t care less. I’m emotionally closed off. After my mother was diagnosed, this all feels so idiotic, so unimportant. It really doesn’t move me anymore.
When I pass the asshole named Dave, he winces, and says, “Back for some more humiliation?”
For a moment I contemplate walking right by him, but then a defensive part of me that’s been lurking underneath my skin awakens. The guy who wrote that note was right. I won’t let anyone, not even Dave, make a fool out of me anymore. I don’t care about the consequences; I’m done trying to play nice with everyone. If they won’t be my friend, they’ll be my enemy instead.
I turn around and punch Dave straight in the face. Adrenaline rushes through me as my fingers leave his face, a mark left on the skin right where I hit him. With astonishment he gapes at me, his mouth hanging slightly open as he cups his jaw with his hand. The laughing has stopped. Everything has died down. It’s so quiet, I could hear a pen drop. Everyone’s looking at me while I turn around with a big smirk on my face and sit down at my table, pretending to be unaware of all the blatant stares.
This was the last day they’d ever tease me.
♥♥♥
Two years later
I’m lying in the grass with Evie, wrapping my head around the fact that we’ll be going to college soon. It’s still mind-blowing that we’re going to the same college. I never imagined I’d get this far. Heck, I never imagined I’d make it through high school.
We’re staring at the sky, making figures in the air with our fingers, tracing the lines of the clouds. Life feels better now that I’ve learned to ignore the bullies. However, it doesn’t change the fact that things will be different from now on. A lot. And I don’t know if I can adjust.
It’s been two years since my mom was diagnosed. Her health has deteriorated quite a bit. It won’t be long before she’s bedridden and unable to care for herself or my dad. When that happens, I don’t know what I’ll be doing. I know he can’t take care of himself, and my mom can’t handle being locked in a house with him all day. If the disease won’t kill her, his nagging will. They still fight. It never ends. So I’m glad I’m off to college, escaping my home and venturing into a new life together with Evie.
Turning my head, I glance at her. She’s the only one who’s still here right beside me, supporting me in whatever I do. She’s what’s kept me going all this time. She was there when I heard the bad news about my mom, and she was there to pick up the pieces of me. There’s no other best friend I could’ve wished for.
I remember the times Brody was my only friend. He was never this protective of me, but I still think back fondly to my time with him. We’ll be sharing the same college soon, and just thinking about it makes my stomach twist in both excitement and anxiety. I can’t wait to see him again. I can’t wait to live my own life and work toward my future.
I’ll need to study hard and work fast so I can get a great job and get some money, so I can finally support my family. Everything will be fine then. It must be. It’s the only way my mom’s medical bills can be paid, and I sure as hell will make it happen.
Somehow, after that day in the hospital, I feel better, stronger, capable of handling everything that comes my way. I may still be that shy girl that doesn’t speak what’s on her mind, but I won’t let anyone walk all over me ever again. I’ll make sure my family will be okay, I’ll support them, by any means necessary, and I’ll never turn my back on anyone who gives me what I crave the most: Acceptance.
I know now that sometimes you have to put all your restraints aside and go all out in order to succeed. Nobody has the right to put me down when I know me and my family deserve a better future. Funny how a stranger’s note can change your entire outlook on life.
So here I am, staring at the clouds with my best friend, saying mental goodbye’s to our senior year in high school, while I mouth the words ‘thank you’ into the air, meant for that one nameless person who thought I was worth it.
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End of FIGHT
Read on for a peek at the first chapter of FIERCE
FIERCE