The professional business of Mr. Waterbrook's establishment was done on the ground floor and the genteel business (of which there was a good deal) in the upper part of the building. I was shown into a pretty but rather close drawing-room, and there sat Agnes, netting a purse.
She looked so quiet and good, and reminded me so strongly of my airy fresh school days at Canterbury, and the sodden, smoky, stupid wretch I had been the other night, that, nobody "being by, I yielded to my self-reproach and shame, and--in short, made a fool of myself. I cannot deny that I shed tears. To this hour I am undecided whether it was upon the whole the wisest thing I could have done, or the most ridiculous.
"If it had been anyone but you, Agnes," said I, turning away my head, "I should not have minded it half so much. But that it should have been you who saw me! I almost wish I had been dead, first."
She put her hand--its touch was like no other hand--upon my arm for a moment, and I felt so befriended and comforted that I could not help moving it to my lips, and gratefully kissing it.
"Sit down," said Agnes, cheerfully. "Don't be unhappy, Trotwood. If you cannot confidently trust me, whom will you trust?"
"Ah, Agnes!" I returned. "You are my good Angel!"
She smiled rather sadly, I thought, and shook her head.
"Yes, Agnes, my good Angell Always my good Angel!"
"If I were, indeed, Trotwood," she returned, "there is one thing that I should set my heart on very much."
I looked at her inquiringly, but already with a foreknowledge of her meaning.
"On warning you," said Agnes, with a steady glance, "against your bad Angel."
["What is my bad Angel?"
"Say who," she mildly replied.
"Who, then?"
"You know my meaning," answered Agnes, and I felt the proof was in my flushed and heated face. "I need not say any more."]
"My dear Agnes," I began, "if you mean Steerforth----"
"I do, Trotwood," she returned.
"Then, Agnes, you wrong him very much. He my bad Angel, or anyone's! He, anything but a guide, a support, and a friend to me! My dear Agnes! Now, is it not unjust, and unlike you, to judge him from what you saw of me the other night?"
"I do not judge him from what I saw of you the other night," she quietly replied.
"From what, then?"
"From many things--trifles in themselves, but they do not seem to me to be so, when they are put together. I judge him, partly from your account of him, Trotwood, and your character, and the influence he has over you."
["Did you know him the other night, Agnes?"
"Yes, I heard them call him by his name."
"Does he not look intelligent, gallant, high-spirited?"
"Yes."
"A gentleman, and a manly handsome fellow?"
"Yes."
"And do you think it natural, or not, that I should trust in him, and be attached to him, and fond of him?"
"Natural, perhaps," said Agnes, "but not wise. No, Trotwood," raising her eyes to mine, and looking full upon me while she spoke, "not wise. It may be only too natural, but it is not wise, and not hopeful."]
There was always something in her modest voice that seemed to touch a chord within me, answering to that sound alone. It was always earnest, but when it was very earnest, as it was now, there was a thrill in it that quite subdued me. I sat looking at her as she cast her eyes down on her work; I sat seeming still to listen to her, and Steerforth, in spite of all my attachment to him, darkened in that tone.
"It is very bold in me," said Agnes, looking up again, "who have lived in such seclusion, and can know so little of the world, to give you my advice so confidently, or even to have this strong opinion. But I know in what it is engendered, Trotwood, in how true a remembrance of our having grown up together, and in how true an interest in all relating to you. It is that which makes me bold. I am certain that what I say is right. I am quite sure it is. I feel as if it were someone else speaking to you, and not I, when I caution you that you have made a dangerous friend."
Again I looked at her; again I listened to her after she was silent, and again his image, though it was still fixed in my heart, darkened.
"I am not so unreasonable as to expect," said Agnes, resuming her usual tone, after a little while, "that you will, or that you can, at once, change any sentiment that has become a conviction to you, least of all a sentiment that is rooted in your trusting disposition. You ought not hastily to do that. I only ask you, Trotwood, if you ever think of me--I mean," with a quiet smile, for I was going to interrupt her, and she knew why, "as often as you think of me--to think of what I have said. Do you forgive me for all this?"
"I will forgive you, Agnes," I replied, "when you come to do Steerforth justice, and to like him as well as I do."
"Not until then?" said Agnes.
I saw a passing shadow on her face when I made this mention of him, but she returned my smile, and we were again as unreserved in our mutual confidence as of old.
"And when, Agnes," said I, "will you forgive me the other night?"
"When I recall it," said Agnes.
She would have dismissed the subject so, but I was too full of it to allow that, and insisted on telling her how it happened that I had disgraced myself, and what chain of accidental circumstances had had the theatre for its final link. It was a great relief to me to do this, and to enlarge on the obligation that I owed to Steerforth for his care of me when I was unable to take care of myself.
"You must not forget," said Agnes, calmly changing the conversation as soon as I had concluded, "that you are always to tell me, not only when you fall into trouble, but when you fall in love. Who has succeeded to Miss Larkins, Trotwood?"
"No one, Agnes."
"Someone, Trotwood," said Agnes, laughing, and holding up her finger.
"No, Agnes, upon my word! There is a lady, certainly, at Mrs. Steerforth's house, who is very clever, and whom I like to talk to--Miss Dartle--but I don't adore her."
Agnes laughed again at her own penetration, and told me that if I were faithful to her in my confidence she thought she should keep a little register of my violent attachments, with the date, duration, and termination of each, like the table of the reigns of the kings and queens, in the History of England. Then she asked me if I had seen Uriah.
"Uriah Heep?" said I. "No. Is he in London?"
"He comes to the office downstairs, every day," returned Agnes. "He was in London a week before me. I am afraid on disagreeable business, Trotwood."
"On some business that makes you uneasy, Agnes, I see," said I. "What can that be?"
Agnes laid aside her work, and replied, folding her hands upon one another, and looking pensively at me out of those beautiful soft eyes of hers:
"I believe he is going to enter into partnership with Papa."
"What? Uriah? That mean, fawning fellow, worm himself into such promotion!" I cried, indignantly. "Have you made no remonstrance about it, Agnes? Consider what a connexion it is likely to be. You must speak out. You must not allow your father to take such a mad step. You must prevent it, Agnes, while there's time."
Still looking at me, Agnes shook her head while I was speaking, with a faint smile at my warmth, and then replied:
"You remember our last conversation about Papa? It was not long after that--not more than two or three days--when he gave me the first intimation of what I tell you. It was sad to see him struggling between his desire to represent it to me as a matter of choice on his part, and his inability to conceal that it was forced upon him. I felt very sony."
"Forced upon him, Agnes! Who forces it upon him?"
"Uriah," she replied, after a moment's hesitation, "has made himself indispensable to Papa. He is subtle and watchful. He has mastered Papa's weaknesses, fostered them, and taken advantage of them, until--to say all that I mean in a word, Trotwood--until Papa is afraid of him."
There was more that she might have said, more that she knew, or that she suspected, I
clearly saw. I could not give her pain by asking what it was; for I knew that she withheld it from me to spare her father. It had long been going on to this, I was sensible--yes, I could not but feel, on the least reflection, that it had been going on to this for a long time. I remained silent.
"His ascendancy over Papa," said Agnes, "is very great. He professes humility and gratitude--with truth, perhaps; I hope so--but his position is really one of power, and I fear he makes a hard use of his power."
I said he was a hound, which, at the moment, was a great satisfaction to me.
"At the time I speak of, as the time when Papa spoke to me," pursued Agnes, "he had told Papa that he was going away, that he was very sorry and unwilling to leave, but that he had better prospects. Papa was very much depressed then, and more bowed down by care than ever you or I have seen him, but he seemed relieved by this expedient of the partnership, though at the same time he seemed hurt by it and ashamed of it."
"And how did you receive it, Agnes?"
"I did, Trotwood," she replied, "what I hope was right. Feeling sure that it was necessary for Papa's peace that the sacrifice should be made, I entreated him to make it. I said it would lighten the load of his life--I hope it will!--and that it would give me increased opportunities of being his companion. Oh, Trotwoodl" cried Agnes, putting her hands before her face, as her tears started on it, "I almost feel as if I had been Papa's enemy, instead of his loving child. For I know how he has altered, in his devotion to me. I know how he has narrowed the circle of his sympathies and duties, in the concentration of his whole mind upon me. I know what a multitude of things he has shut out for my sake, and how his anxious thoughts of me have shadowed his life, and weakened his strength and energy, by turning them always upon one idea. If I could ever set this right! If I could ever work out his restoration, as I have so innocently been the cause of his declinel"
I had never before seen Agnes cry. I had seen tears in her eyes when I had brought new honours home from school, and I had seen them there when we last spoke about her father, and I had seen her turn her gentle head aside when we took leave of one another, but I had never seen her grieve like this. It made me so sorry that I could only say, in a foolish, helpless manner, "Pray, Agnes, don't! Don't, my dear sisterl"
But Agnes was too superior to me in character and purpose, as I know well now, whatever I might know or not know then, to be long in need of my entreaties. The beautiful, calm manner, which makes her so different in my remembrance from everybody else, came back again, as if a cloud had passed from a serene sky,
"We are not likely to remain alone much longer," said Agnes, "and, while I have an opportunity, let me earnestly entreat you, Trotwood, to be friendly to Uriah. Don't repel him. Don't resent (as I think you have a general disposition to do) what may be uncongenial to you in him. He may not deserve it, for we know no certain ill of him. In any case, think first of Papa and me!"
Agnes had no time to say more, for the room-door opened, and Mrs. Waterbrook, who was a large lady--or who wore a large dress; I don't exactly know which, for I don't know which was dress and which was lady--came sailing in. I had a dim recollection of having seen her at the theatre, as if I had seen her in a pale magic lantern, but she appeared to remember me perfectly, and still to suspect me of being in a state of intoxication.
Finding by degrees, however, that I was sober, and (I hope) that I was a modest young gentleman, Mrs. Waterbrook softened towards me considerably, and inquired, firstly, if I went much into the parks, and secondly, if I went much into society. On my replying to both these questions in the negative, it occurred to me that I fell again in her good opinion, but she concealed the fact gracefully, and invited me to dinner next day. I accepted the invitation, and took my leave, making a call on Uriah in the office as I went out, and leaving a card for him in his absence.
When I went to dinner next day, and, on the street-door being opened, plunged into a vapour-bath of haunch of mutton, I divined that I was not the only guest, for I immediately identified the ticket-porter in disguise, assisting the family servant, and waiting at the foot of the stairs to carry up my name. He looked, to the best of his ability, when he asked me for it confidentially, as if he had never seen me before, but well did I know him, and well did he know me. Conscience made cowards of us both.
I found Mr. Waterbrook to be a middle-aged gentleman, with a short throat, and a good deal of shirt-collar, who only wanted a black nose to be the portait of a pug-dog. He told me he was happy to have the honour of making my acquaintance, and, when I had paid my homage to Mrs. Waterbrook, presented me, with much ceremony, to a very awful lady in a black velvet dress, and a great black velvet hat, whom I remember as looking like a near relation of Hamlet's--say his aunt.
Mrs. Henry Spiker was this lady's name, and her husband was there too, so cold a man that his head, instead of being grey, seemed to be sprinkled with hoar-frost. Immense deference was shown to the Henry Spikers, male and female, which Agnes told me was on account of Mr. Henry Spiker being solicitor to something or to somebody, I forget what or which, remotely connected with the Treasury.
I found Uriah Heep among the company, in a suit of black, and in deep humility. He told me, when I shook hands with him, that he was proud to be noticed by me, and that he really felt obliged to me for my condescension. I could have wished he had been less obliged to me, for he hovered about me in his gratitude all the rest of the evening, and, whenever I said a word to Agnes, was sure, with his shadowless eyes and cadaverous face, to be looking gauntly down upon us from behind.
There were other guests--all iced for the occasion, as it struck me, like the wine. But, there was one who attracted my attention before he came in, on account of my hearing him announced as Mr. Traddles! My mind flew back to Salem House, and could it be Tommy, I thought, who used to draw the skeletons!
I looked for Mr. Traddles with unusual interest. He was a sober, steady-looking young man of retiring manners, with a comic head of hair, and eyes that were rather wide open, and he got into an obscure comer so soon that I had some difficulty in making him out. At length I had a good view of him, and either my vision deceived me, or it was the old unfortunate Tommy.
I made my way to Mr. Waterbrook, and said that I believed I had the pleasure of seeing an old school-fellow there.
"Indeed!" said Mr. Waterbrook, surprised. "You are too young to have been at school with Mr. Henry Spiker?"
"Oh, I don't mean him!" I returned. "I mean the gentleman named Traddles."
"Oh! Aye, aye! Indeed!" said my host, with much diminished interest. "Possibly."
"If it's really the same person," said I, glancing towards him, "it was at a place called Salem House where we were together, and he was an excellent fellow."
"Oh yes. Traddles is a good fellow," returned my host, nodding his head with an air of toleration. "Traddles is quite a good fellow."
"It's a curious coincidence," said I.
"It is really," returned my host, "quite a coincidence, that Traddles should be here at all, as Traddles was only invited this morning, when the place at table, intended to be occupied by Mrs. Henry Spiker's brother, became vacant, in consequence of his indisposition. A very gentlemanly man, Mrs. Henry Spiker's brother, Mr. Copperfield."
I murmured an assent, which was full of feeling, considering that I knew nothing at all about him, and I inquired what Mr. Traddles was by profession.
"Traddles," returned Mr. Waterbrook, "is a young man reading for the bar. Yes. He is quite a good fellow--nobody's enemy but his own."
"Is he his own enemy?" said I, sorry to hear this.
"Well," returned Mr. Waterbrook, pursing up his mouth, and playing with his watch-chain, in a comfortable, prosperous sort of way, "I should say he was one of those men who stand in their own light. Yes, I should say he would never, for example, be worth five hundred pound. Traddles was recommended to me by a professional friend. Oh yes. Yes. He has a kind of talent for drawing briefs, and stating a case in w
riting, plainly. I am able to throw something in Traddles's way, in the course of the year, something--for him--considerable. Oh yes. Yes."
I was much impressed by the extremely comfortable and satisfied manner in which Mr. Waterbrook delivered himself of this little word "Yes," every now and then. There was wonderful expression in it. It completely conveyed the idea of a man who had been born, not to say with a silver spoon, but with a scaling-ladder, and had gone on mounting all the heights of life one after another, until now he looked, from the top of the fortifications, with the eye of a philosopher and a patron, on the people down in the trenches.
My reflections on this theme were still in progress when dinner was announced. Mr. Waterbrook went down with Hamlet's aunt. Mr. Henry Spiker took Mrs. Waterbrook. Agnes, whom I should have liked to take myself, was given to a simpering fellow with weak legs. Uriah, Traddles, and I, as the junior part of the company, went down last, how we could. I was not so vexed at losing Agnes as I might have been, since it gave me an opportunity of making myself known to Traddles on the stairs, who greeted me with great fervour, while Uriah writhed with such obtrusive satisfaction and self-abasement, that I could gladly have pitched him over the banisters.
Traddles and I were separated at table, being billeted in two remote corners, he in the glare of a red velvet lady, I, in the gloom of Hamlet's aunt. The dinner was very long, and the conversation was about the Aristocracy--and Blood. Mrs. Waterbrook repeatedly told us that if she had a weakness, it was Blood.
It occurred to me several times that we should have got on better if we had not been quite so genteel. We were so exceedingly genteel, that our scope was very limited. A Mr. and Mrs. Gulpidge were of the party, who had something to do at second-hand (at least, Mr. Gulpidge had), with the law business of the Bank, and what with the Bank, and what with the Treasury, we were as exclusive as the Court Circular. To mend the matter, Hamlet's aunt had the family failing of indulging in soliloquy, and held forth in a desultory manner, by herself, on every topic that was introduced; These were few enough, to be sure, but as we always fell back upon Blood, she had as wide a field for abstract speculation as her nephew himself.
We might have been a party of Ogres, the conversation assumed such a sanguine complexion.