When we have it together again, I ask, “Where are we going?”
“TJ took an indirect route back across the city. We’re on the east side but I don’t think we’ll go all the way to Sandy.”
Because they don’t trust Harris…
“Is this bringing anything back?” he asks, still running his hands over me like he needs to convince himself that I’m really here. “Harris said the memory block wouldn’t be perfect with your two different head injuries. It’s not a guaranteed thing to start with.”
I hope that means I can fight through it.
“Some kind of memory is coming back.” I exhale, a long cleansing breath, and hold him tighter. In this moment, the world feels right, and I embrace that feeling even though it scares me.
“Eli?”
“Yes?”
“Were we really married? I still don’t know if everything was a cover up.”
“Yes, we’re legally married. Six years now. TJ wasn’t lying to you when he said we have a legal trail of paperwork.”
“Legally aside, were we really married?”
“Yes, we’re really, fully married.” He straightens, prompting me to lift my face and look at him. “I meant every word I said about loving you and needing you.”
We both hear the camper door open. No one calls us, but we know it’s time to move on. We go inside and return to the bed in back.
As TJ drives off, I look around at them, noticing more now that my head is clearer. Nick and Sage are holding hands under the table. He’s in a plain gray sweatshirt, the neck ripped in front. She has a fitted brown leather coat on over a gray shirt.
Eli wears a plain black t-shirt and jeans, his typical outfit. TJ’s wearing something similar, a shirt and sweats. They don’t look like a secret vigilante group, or whatever they’re claiming. But all the evidence points to that conclusion.
“So why…” I glance at Nick and Sage, and then Eli. “What about TJ?” I don’t want to come straight out and ask why we have two couples and one lone ranger. No one answers right away, and I catch a look between Nick and Sage.
Eli explains in a somber voice, “We’ve lost people.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
Eli’s words bring silence for several long moments. I think we’re going to move on, but then TJ speaks from the driver’s seat. “Her name was NaTasha. We worked together for three years before she died. It wasn’t even supposed to be a dangerous operation, but a couple of things went wrong on their side.” He speaks in a flat voice that must be concealing layers of pain.
“Their side? Who?”
“Lowlife drug dealers. We were trying to find out who was selling a new drug to kids. It looked like candy, so it was infiltrating the schools quickly. Authorities didn’t know about it yet. We finally had a meeting to buy some, but the guy Ricko was late, and he had to take us somewhere to meet the boss. We were late to that, the boss was freaked out, and Ricko was high on the drug and hallucinating. Anyway, short story is he got so worried he pulled his gun and shot NaTasha in the heart.”
“I’m sorry.” I wish I could remember her. I have so many questions that the one I do ask surprises me. “So Harris just let me walk away? Did all of you walk away too?”
A look goes around the camper. This time, I’m included. I feel the common vibe—and feel a part of this team. When I tilt my head, mouth parted, they wait.
“Harris has been overseeing this,” I say slowly as understanding dawns, “but he doesn’t know I ran off or that you found me again.”
Eli gives a slight nod.
“And he could figure it out at any time,” I add. “We’re sitting ducks right now.”
I don’t like it. When they found me, they might have brought anyone following them. Now I realize why we’re driving around.
I sit on the edge of the bed and lean forward, elbows on knees, eyes closed. If I can get my memory fixed, it would solve everything. So why did I push so hard to get it erased before? Why did I do this to myself and pull all of them into it too?
That question leads to a very dark, downward spiral, and my mind and heart can’t handle it yet. I need to focus on the facts and what this team can tell me. I straighten up and look at Eli. “Tell me about JP Industries and this secret part. Why did we all join it in the first place?”
He’s thoughtful for a minute. “Well, to start, we work to take down thieves, drug lords, prostitute rings, child porn rings, scammers.” Eli speaks in total seriousness, his eyes homed in on me. Like Eli, Nick and TJ are both in top shape. Sage too. And I know they’re all capable of playing a double role.
“And we all wanted to do that?”
“It’s our job to make the world a better place. Our organization works all over the world, freeing people, stopping crime, and doing what we can. We were all nobodies without a family. An operative made contact with each of us and told us just enough that we could make a choice. Then we pledged, and our lives changed.”
His words wash over me, feeling both real and unbelievable.
I shake my head. “What about the CIA? FBI? The government? World Peace organizations? I’ve never heard about anything like what you’re describing.”
“That’s the point. We do what others can’t. We’re invisible. We’re outside of the law because we have no name, no recognition, no accountability but to ourselves and our vows.”
Something bugs me, something that doesn’t add up. I think about Harris, what I remember about him from my stay in the Portland hospital and what they’ve told me today. Instead of voicing my doubts, I ask, “So Harris heads up the entire organization?”
“He does now,” Eli says. “It was started in nineteen-sixty by a young billionaire named Allen Forest McAllister. A few years before that, he had several companies and a family: a wife and two young sons. After he took over another company, armed men broke into his home and killed his family. The police weren’t able to make any arrests in the case, but McAllister knew who was responsible. That changed him, and his life’s purpose, and he vowed to go after the evil doers that the authorities couldn’t touch.”
The story feels familiar, an odd feeling to me these days.
“And?” I ask. “How did things go from that to now?”
“He passed away five years ago and left Harris in charge.”
So maybe Harris came in with a different vision? I mull it over while gazing through the ugly curtains at the road behind us. As I watch a car about forty yards back, I think about Harris but also about fixing my memory. Do I want to remember everything if it’s possible? Or should I trust my old self and let the secrets stay buried? I wonder if there’s something I need to remember to stay safe and keep these people safe. Why did they trust me so much before?
In between all these chaotic thoughts, I notice the car change lanes again and drop back, but I catch a glimpse of the driver’s long face and notice he’s chewing gum. Something seems familiar.
Eli touches my shoulder. He’s holding out a pair of very small binoculars. In this case, size doesn’t matter. They provide an excellent and crystal clear view even through the curtains. I find the car and get a better look at the man driving.
I know him.
Jack. I think his last name is Jackson, and it got shortened to Jack, like a first name. But I can’t fill in any context, like where I know him from.
“See something?” Sage asks.
“There’s a black sedan that’s stayed with us for awhile.” I leave the rest out for now, too swamped with new memories to make sense of anything.
“We’re in traffic,” Nick says, but he takes a closer look. The curtains are so old and thin that we can actually see through them. He turns toward the front. “TJ, let’s take an exit just to be safe.”
We hold our breaths and watch as the sedan takes the same exit. Eli and I exchange a look.
“Could be coincidence,” he says with a light shrug.
“Do we believe in those?” I raise an ey
ebrow at him. We both know better. And then he gives me another glance, this time with a gleam in his eye.
“You’re remembering, or…”
“Or something,” I agree, not sure what to make of this either.
“This isn’t a fast vehicle,” Sage says. “We’ll have to outsmart whoever that is.”
I turn around, letting Eli watch behind us, so I can say, “If Harris authorized all this, why is he having someone trail us?”
“He’s not the most trusting man.” Eli speaks still watching out back. The camper switches lanes and makes a turn. We squeeze down an alley and shoot across a street, leaving a trail of honking horns. I don’t see the sedan anymore.
“Maybe it’s not Harris?” I say. It’s starting to make sense to me even though I can’t place my gut feeling. “Maybe someone else sent this guy?”
He glances at me, troubled. Just then the camper leans to the left as we take a sharp right turn.
“TJ!” Nick calls out. “Drive normally so we don’t alert anyone else. There might be more of them out there.”
“We’re clear, for now.” While he weaves through traffic, I slide down to sit on the floor. The camper lurches right and left and my stomach starts to feel it, probably due to the drug still in my system.
Sage drops down in front of me.
“Do you have a cover for this thing?”
“The camper? Yes. It’s in that cupboard over there by the floor.” I’d bought it at Wal-Mart but hadn’t used it yet. She turns and pulls it out. Nick and Eli help her spread it out as best they can in this space.
After another sharp turn, TJ throws the camper into park and jumps up to help them. I follow everyone outside, and we cover the vehicle. With a glance around, I see TJ found an empty driveway to park in.
“All right, let’s get inside,” Sage says as she grabs my arm. We duck under the tarp, and a few seconds later Nick and TJ jump inside.
“It’s tied down,” TJ says.
“But we can’t see out now,” I comment, while I wonder why Eli didn’t come in too. My mind is waking up more and more, so I understand what’s going on as I speak. Eli is outside somewhere to keep watch. “So we just sit tight for now?”
“And talk options.”
Chapter Thirty-Four
*
Eli
I did not come this far to lose her again.
I scan up and down the street from my vantage point crouched behind a large trash bin between two houses. Light traffic keeps my attention, but I don’t see anyone even remotely paying attention to the side of the road. People are on autopilot, driving with tunnel vision. The winter sun is setting, taking its weak warmth with it. The cold feels nice—keeps me on my toes. I need to be crystal clear right now.
The falling darkness, however, makes it harder to scrutinize the passing vehicles.
Sage had been smart to think of covering the camper. Now it looked like any other camper sitting by a house, waiting to be used. Whoever was following us probably won’t even register it if they drive by. I wait an hour before deciding to check in.
I bring my radio up to my mouth to speak quietly. “Hello.”
“Hey there.”
“The movie starts at seven.” By that, I mean we should wait until then to head out so we’ll have the cover of darkness.
“Okay.”
We go silent again, keeping communication to a minimal, even with the closed circuit radio. That means I’m staying out here for awhile. I settle in, not upset about it, but wishing I could be with Megan. I wanted to go in with her, but I wanted to be the one keeping an eye out.
She’s been so brave, even before she had any clue about what was going on. I saw the surprise in her eyes when I said this was all her idea. In a way, I’m surprised she believes me this time, but what we had must have gone deeper than memory. Me and Megan, we’re like one heart. And this is our family. She knows that now even if this doesn’t make sense; I can tell she does.
We have to get out of this and figure out who’s following us, and what we’ll do, but we’re on the same team again. We’ll have to ditch the camper. I have this strange feeling Megan is attached to it. Hopefully she doesn’t fight us on the issue.
An hour later, I check in and tell Sage, “She needs to get her stuff ready.”
“Good idea.”
I pull in a deep breath and tell myself yet again: we found her. She’s okay. I wasn’t sure we would be able to locate her, or that she’d hear me out when we did. Will she accept her previous decisions, or will she want to dig up the past and figure out what happened? I wanted to know before. Now, I just want to have our life back.
She’s fighting to comprehend everything and put it together while sorting out what she wants. The old Megan wiped out that life, but the new Megan still has her drive to know everything. What if we can’t fix her memory? We’d have to convince Harris. And since he’s having us followed, I’m guessing he’s not too happy with us.
Chapter Thirty-Five
*
Megan
While we wait, I find my wedding ring and the necklace Eli gave me for Christmas and put them back on. Sage watches me and gives a sad smile.
“I’m sorry you were the one to go under with Roberto,” she says.
“Sage… That wasn’t your fault. It was just the plan. I caught his eye.” I shrug, hoping she’ll see it’s not important anymore. We sit on the bed together, shoulder to shoulder, and she recounts her side of everything, from when I went undercover to living in Sandy.
“Now what?” I ask. We’ve been sitting here for hours.
“Now we head out.” Nick stands and goes to the door, silently cracking it. “We’ll move fast. Get ready.”
We each have a bag with the cash I’d hidden throughout the camper and a few survival supplies. I have a Glock, a knife, a flashlight, duct tape, and a little food. I’m not sure what we’re doing after this or where we’re going.
One by one, we slip outside and silently move to the closest alley. Eli is waiting there, where it’s too dark to make out his expression. There’s a pause when we arrive and Eli wraps one arm across my shoulders, pulling me against him for the quickest of embraces. Then he leads the way and we walk single file in the other direction until he stops us. TJ, Nick, and Sage come up so we’re huddled like football players.
“Resources?” TJ either says or asks.
“The cash and supplies on us, three drop locations with cash, the radios. We might have some usable IDs, but not with us…” Sage trails off, then adds, “Maybe the camper if we wanted to stash it somewhere safe.”
“I don’t like that idea.” Nick puts a hand on her shoulder. “We need to take every precaution we can.”
“You’re right. So what else do we have?”
Eli speaks up. “A safe house. No one knows about it.”
“You’re completely sure on that?” TJ voices the question we’re all asking ourselves. After all, someone found us once already.
“It’s untraceable to anything related to me, any of you, or the organization.”
“All right,” Nick says before turning to Sage. They whisper for a few seconds. “Then let’s split up tonight and meet tomorrow, somewhere else, to go to the safe house.”
“Two or three groups?” Eli asks. Something about it isn’t a question—he plans for me and him to stay together.
“Two.” TJ’s voice comes out of the darkness. We agree on a meeting place and time for the next day, and a backup for the day after that if anyone misses the first meetup.
Just as we’re about to go our separate ways, Sage says, “No contact until an hour before.”
Eli touches my arm so I’ll wait, and says, “Agreed. And let’s use a different cue, something Harris won’t recognize.”
To save time, I don’t ask for an explanation.
“If everything is okay, roll your coat sleeves up once.” It’s a whisper so I can’t tell who spoke. I feel two hands pa
t my arm before they turn away. I leave with Eli and walk down the dark alley, glad to see streetlights out on the main road ahead of us.
***
Eli and I walk together, arms linked, like we’re lovers out for a late night walk, but we keep our eyes and ears open. We left the group an hour ago, took a bus across town, and haven’t seen anything so far. We’re walking down a busy street and turn to head out toward a residential area.
“How can we stay anywhere?” I ask, remembering my predicament when I arrived in Portland. Then, one step ahead of him—or so I think—I add, “Even if you have a fake ID, won’t Harris know about it?”
“What did you do?” he asks, apparently one step ahead of me.
“We’re going to break into a camper?”
He flicks a curious look at me.
“The first night, I snuck into a really nice fifth wheel next to a house. Then I found the older camper and bought it. I kinda liked it.”
He laughs softly. “I thought you would have. You used to talk about leaving everything behind and hitting the road, just traveling around without a destination.”
It rings true, bringing a wonderful sense of self back to me. Maybe we could do that now. Maybe that’s the answer.
“We’re going to the safe house tonight,” he says, when I’d forgotten about it.
“To make sure it’s safe?”
“That, and I wanted time with you.”
We have things to talk about, which I’m sure we both know, but his words make my lower stomach clench with need for him. Even in the dark, he feels how I’m watching him and looks over.
“Here we go,” he says, taking my arm and directing me to turn down another street. The houses are small and packed together, but neat, with tiny manicured lawns decorated with gnomes, little animal statues, and landscaping lights. We walk past four houses and then up a walkway to the front door of the fifth one. A cement fawn watches our progress. Eli unlocks it and lets us inside where it’s pitch black.
“Wait here.”
A minute later a kerosene lamp bursts to life, illuminating the entire space because it’s so small. Eli carries it to the table. “It’s clear.”