Page 17 of Born of Shadows


  As gently as she could, she took a bandage from his worn-out pack and pressed it against the worst-looking wound that was in the middle of the ornate tattoo he had running the length of his left side. It appeared to be a foreign bird whose face was painted on his shoulder.

  Caillen's eyes flew open as he let out a fierce breath. He grabbed her wrist so hard that she was sure it'd leave a bruise. But as soon as his gaze focused on her, his hold turned gentle.

  He dropped his hand away from hers. Are they still here? he mouthed the words to her.

  She nodded.

  He pointed to his pack.

  She handed it over to him and watched as he removed several items. The first thing he did was pull out a rubber stick that he put between his teeth. She scowled, wondering what it was for. Was it some kind of painkiller?

  He grabbed a large foil pack and opened it, then spread the granules over his wounds. He bit the stick so hard, she heard it snap. By the rigidity of his body, she could tell it had to burn and ache. Still, he made no sound at all.

  She took the foil pack from him and started applying it to all of his wounds. His muscles contracted every time she touched him. Poor guy.

  But he was one hell of a soldier. He took it like a man.

  Once she was finished, she handed him a bottle of water before she started bandaging his side. While she worked, he pulled an injector out and took a dose of pain meds.

  Caillen sipped the water slowly as he did his best to not scream out from the sheer agony that pulsed through him with every heartbeat. He didn't need to make himself sick, but he had to stay hydrated. Gah, it hurt.

  Closing his eyes, he focused on the softness of Desideria's hands as she bandaged him and let that soothe him as much as it could. He still couldn't believe that she'd come back for him. Most people lacked that honor and decency.

  Hell, most of the "friends" he'd had in his life would have tied him up while he was wounded and stolen his wallet before they left him for the Enforcers to find.

  But she'd come back...

  Like an angel.

  She took the water from him long enough to wet a cloth that she then used to clean his face. Her hand was so cool and soft against his skin that before he realized what he was doing, he captured it and kissed her knuckles.

  Desideria froze at the sensation of his lips on her flesh. No one had ever been so tender with her. The feathery touch made her stomach contract sharply. Her gaze locked with his and for a moment she forgot everything except for the beauty of his real eyes, the sensation of her hand in his. Without thinking, she touched his soft lips with her fingertip. They were the only part of him that wasn't rock hard. And before she realized what she was doing, she dipped her head down to taste them.

  Caillen sucked his breath in sharply at the unexpected kiss. Damn, if he didn't hurt so badly, he'd take advantage of this fire. But right now, he could barely breathe. Still the heat of that kiss seared him. What she lacked in experience, she more than made up for in enthusiasm and it sent a wave of pleasure through him that eased the pain.

  At least for a few heartbeats.

  Desideria pulled back as she came to her senses and realized what she was doing.

  I'm kissing a man. And she wasn't allowed to do that. Not yet...

  Her mother would kill her if she learned of this. Worse, she'd have to wait an additional year before she could take a consort. Qillaq beliefs were that if a woman couldn't control her lust, then she wasn't mature enough to handle a lover. What she'd just done would shame her mother and herself.

  Heat flooded her face. "Sorry."

  His cocky grin was adorable for once. "Don't be," he whispered. "It's the best thing that's happened to me all month. Feel free to fall against my lips anytime you get the urge."

  She shook her head at him. "You're awful."

  Caillen cupped her cheek in his hand. "Rotten to my core."

  He was also charming in a most devastating way. "Just how many women have you seduced anyway?"

  He shrugged, then grimaced sharply. "I don't count because it doesn't matter."

  Now that offended her. What a callous pig! "How can you say it doesn't matter?"

  "Because it was never the right one."

  Those words gave her pause. Could he be less piggish than she thought? Was it possible there really was a gentleman hiding under those layers of heartless rogue? "What do you mean?"

  "Mmm," he breathed. "Pain meds are kicking in with a vengeance. Yeah, I almost feel semi human again."

  She turned his head until he was looking at her. "You didn't answer my question."

  "Simple." His words were slurred now. "If there's a selfish bitch to be had, I gravitate straight for her. Women only want to use me, own me or kill me. Not once has a woman ever wanted to keep me." Then he closed his eyes and passed out again.

  Those words and the heartfelt emotion she'd heard behind them touched something deep inside her. It made her wonder what the women in his life had done to him to make him feel that way. Of course, her experience with women was similar. The women around her had been petty, judgmental, cutting and jealous. They thought by tearing others down that it elevated them. They were wrong, but it didn't stop them from it.

  She had no real experience with men. Except her dad and she'd loved him like no one else. He'd been the only person in her life who'd ever accepted her as she was. He'd never judged her or even criticized her.

  Caillen was nothing like her father, but in some ways he did remind her of her dad. The way he was dependable and caring--willing to sacrifice himself for others.

  She frowned at the bloody rag lying beside him. "You are such a mess."

  What if he died?

  Desideria refused to think about that and the foreign ache it caused. She couldn't afford to. As she began putting things back into the pack, she found a small laptop.

  What the...? Why hadn't he used it? Or at least mentioned that he had one?

  She opened it to turn it on, then thought better of it. If the Andarions were electronically sweeping the area they'd hone in on the signal. That was probably why Caillen hadn't used it before now. He was too much of a survivalist to allow something like this to go unused unless there was a good reason for it.

  You're completely cut off.

  She'd never been alone before. Even though she was twenty-six years old, her family had viewed her as a child up until a couple of weeks ago. She'd been surrounded by guards and servants. Her sisters and aunt. It was a lost feeling to not be able to reach out and summon them now. Or anyone else who could lend her a hand. Her mother had never experienced this isolated sensation either.

  But her father had. Stranded on a foreign planet with foreign beings who'd seen him as a weaker entity who only deserved their disdain and abuse.

  Caillen had assured her that she'd receive the same treatment from the Andarions if they discovered them. They'd be pawns with no way to escape and no hope. She glanced around the bare gray walls as panic set in. How had her father stood being a prisoner for all those years?

  It was terrifying. For the first time, she fully understood everything he'd given up.

  Suddenly, Caillen's link rang.

  Krik! That could get her discovered. Her heart hammering, she picked it up, then froze. Caillen had turned it off. She'd seen him. How could it be ringing?

  Was it a trick?

  What if it wasn't? It could be help.

  Maybe.

  Hoping for the best, she answered it before it rang again.

  "Who is this?" It was a gruff, accented male voice.

  "Desideria," she whispered. "Who are you?"

  He hung up.

  She quickly did the same as her gut knotted and this time she made sure it was turned completely off.

  And then she heard it... the sound of the Andarions returning to the warehouse in force and they were a lot more animated this time.

  I've just given our position away.

  They were going to co
me for them and it was all her fault. Damn it! Why had she answered the link?

  15

  Desideria held her breath as the voices came closer and close. There were animals with them and it sounded like a lot of them. She could hear them whining and barking as the Andarions searched through the building.

  As fast as was possible, she grabbed the spray that Caillen had used earlier out of the bag, and turned it loose on the door and on them. Please don't have an erackle in that hunting herd.

  According to Caillen, that would be bad. And since he had yet to be wrong about anything to do with their pursuit...

  Yeah, a horny erackle would most likely ruin her day.

  What she hated most about all of this was her feelings of vulnerability. She'd always prided herself on being self-sufficient--on being able to handle anything thrown at her. And she was.

  But this...

  This was way out of her realm of experience and expertise. She was in an alien culture with an unconscious stranger. Here, she didn't know the rules or the climate. She didn't even know what foods were safe to eat or how to find them. It now struck her as peculiar that her aunt had taught her to fight to survive, but never how to scrounge and use resources. Not the way Caillen did.

  She glanced to him. For some reason she couldn't explain, his presence soothed her. Yeah, it made no sense whatsoever. He was completely out of commission. Would be worthless in a fight or even if they had to run and yet... she could hear his sarcastic voice in her head, giving her tips on what they needed to escape and survive.

  What is wrong with me?

  Desideria had been taught to trust no one. Not even family. And right now, when she needed to listen to that training, she didn't hear her aunt's careful instruction.

  She heard Caillen's.

  Without thinking, she took his hand into hers. Even though it was filthy and calloused, it was beautiful--just like the rest of him. He had long, tapered fingers with nails that were clipped but not manicured the way other noblemen's were. Caillen's were rugged work hands. Masculine hands.

  And they, too, comforted her...

  Something struck the trapdoor. Hard. She bit her lip to keep from making a sound as she tightened her grip on Caillen's hand and her blaster, waiting for them to break through.

  They hit it again.

  An animal barked, then ran off making unfamiliar noises that sounded like a whine. There was a huge ruckus before the Andarions followed the creature. After a few minutes, everything was quiet again.

  Still, she held her breath and kept her grip tight, waiting for them to return and discover their lair.

  Hours and hours went by slowly as her heart beat a fearful rhythm. Finally she allowed herself to relax and accept the fact that they were safe.

  Even if it was only for a moment.

  Sighing, she leaned her head back against the wall and laid the blaster down. The muscles in her arm were tight and strained from having held its weight for so long. She laced her fingers with Caillen's and sat in silence as she let the roughness of his skin soothe her even more. It felt so good to know that she wasn't completely alone in this. Even though he was unconscious.

  Thank the gods the Andarions were gone. This one moment of peace was worth a fortune to her.

  Please don't let it end.

  She'd had enough excitement for one day, or actually fifty thousand. Really, she didn't need any more. Relieved to the point she could almost cry, her gaze fell to Caillen who hadn't moved in so long she became worried about it. When he'd slept earlier, he'd had a faint snore.

  Now nothing...

  Had he died? Was he breathing? Sudden panic swelled inside her as her mind conjured all manner of bad scenarios.

  Please don't be dead. Don't have bled out. Not while she'd been worried about them when she should have been tending him...

  She inched forward to place her hand under his nose so that his breath could tickle her skin.

  Thank the gods, he was still alive. That was almost as big a relief as the Andarions leaving the building. And as he lay there sleeping, she couldn't help but notice how handsome he really was in the faint blue light. How boyish and relaxed.

  How completely out of commission he was and how dependent they were on her for their survival...

  Yeah, that was a scary prospect.

  Caillen, you're so screwed. She'd never taken care of anyone before. Not even a pet. Honestly, she was afraid she might kill the poor man out of ignorance. She knew some field medicine, but not much and all of it was in theory. She'd never had to actually use it. It just hadn't been taught as part of their lessons.

  Come on, Desideria, you can do this. Her people prided themselves on their survival abilities. But then survival to them was synonymous with fighting--being able to protect yourself.

  Her gaze went to the ragged backpack...

  A pack that carried everything a person would ever need to live through just about anything. Curious about its contents, she pulled it to her and opened the worn leather. She paused as she caught an unexpected whiff of Caillen's scent. Warm and all masculine, it made her heartbeat speed up. She didn't know why she adored the smell of his skin, but she did. In truth, she'd love nothing better than to bury her face in his neck and just inhale him.

  Pushing that disturbing thought aside, she started sorting through the contents of his pack to take inventory in case she needed something before he woke back up. He really did have the most bizarre combination in it. Socks, sunglasses, medicines, dehydrated food and water. Her height="0em">

  Prophylactics...

  She didn't even want to think about that one. Well, not entirely true. For some reason, she did have a strange curiosity about what he'd look like naked. What it would feel like to hold him in her arms and have him kiss her like a hungry lover. To have his hair fall forward in his face as he lay on top of her, looking down with that devilish grin of his...

  He probably was great in bed.

  Oh, what is wrong with me?

  Then again, Narcissa would say there was something wrong with her if she didn't want to have sex with him. That made her feel a little better.

  Still...

  She was in the middle of a chase. Her enemies could find her any second and if that wasn't enough reason to keep her thoughts off his body, there was the small matter of him being a prowling rogue who carried prophylactics in his bag, scamming for an easy lay. Definitely not her type of male at all. Not even a little bit. She wanted someone who could be loyal and sweet. Someone dependable to be there when she needed him who could support but never overshadow her.

  Someone like her father.

  That thought solidified her conviction as she continued to make her way through the pack's contents which included an obscene amount of small condiment packages.

  What in the world? Did one human really need this much sauce or crackers? Really?

  All of a sudden, she paused. In the bottom of the pack she found the most amazing thing of all. Something she would have never suspected a man like Caillen to carry.

  A small vidframe.

  How very strange.

  Sitting back on her heels, she turned it on and waited for the photos to load. In the darkness, she flipped through the images that spoke volumes about the man next to her. There was one of a beautiful redheaded woman and a tall dark-haired man standing beside her. They looked so happy and sweet. The love they had for each other as they embraced was more than evident and it was breathtaking.

  Both of them were dressed in white for some kind of ceremony she didn't recognize. The man's shoulder-length hair framed his handsome, clean-shaven face. His skin was a much darker tone than Caillen's, more like hers, and his eyes were so black she couldn't tell where the iris ended and his pupil began. He had two small gold hoops in his left earlobe. The woman's dress was strapless and as stunning as she was. It fell in light layers around her skinny body and she had white flowers braided into her long hair.

  Desideria pressed
the play button.

  They immediately kissed.

  "Hey, guys, stop. Stop! You're making me sick. Seriously, I'm about to splash shoes here and since Shay splurged to buy hers, I don't want to get hurt.0 She recognized Caillen's voice, castigating them. Judging from the loudness of the tone, she assumed he was the one holding the camera. "Syn, that's my sister you're tonguing and I'm going to beat your ass again if you don't get away from her. I mean it. I don't care that you're married now. She's still my sister and you're a dead man."

  Syn scoffed, his dark eyes sending a challenge. "You didn't beat it the last time, giakon. As I recall, I sent you packing."

  The camera bounced to show the rapidly shifting ground as Caillen headed for him.

  The woman came between them and pushed Caillen back. The camera went swinging around her body until she righted it and forced Caillen to move another step away from Syn. "You touch my husband again, Cai, and I'll paint your rear stabilizer red. Now behave and show Syn that I raised you right." Laughing, she took the camera from Caillen and turned it on him.

  Desideria's breath caught as she saw not a rigid aristocrat, but a man so unbelievably handsome that it was hard to even look at him. Dressed in a black formal suit and freshly shaved, Caillen was absolutely stunning even though he was fuming angry. Only he could pull off that amount of hotness and rage at the same time.

  "Annoying, isn't it, little brother?" Shahara asked as she moved so close to him that Desideria could almost see up his nostrils.

  Recovering his usual good nature, he flashed that charming grin and stepped away from her. "You'll be glad you have these pictures one day."

  "Doubt it. I see you act a fool enough. Why would I want to capture it for all eternity?"

  Two more women came up and wrapped their arms around Caillen before he could respond.

  "Here, Shahara, let me have it." She heard Syn off camera. "Get over there with your brother and sisters and let's get all the Dagans together. It'll be the only still you have of Kasen in a dress."

  "Hey!" the heavier of the two sisters snarled. "I'll remember that, Syn. What are you saying about me?"