Please let me have that one more small favor.
With any luck at all, the so commoness would continue to cover him enough that he wouldn't have to make a mad dash in his busted body or use the adrenaline shot. But as he crept forward, he saw a shadow mimic his movements.
Yeah, it was definitely following him.
16
Desideria started to follow after Caillen even though he'd told her to stay put. She didn't like being left behind. What if he didn't come back?
Or if the Andarions found her while he was gone?
You turn yourself in and hope they don't eat you. Yeah, getting eaten would definitely stink. And it was strange that while he was unconscious that fear hadn't been as potent as it was now. Now it was palatable.
What is wrong with me?
She could fight the Andarions on her own. It would be easier now since she wouldn't have to cover someone who was unconscious. She tightened her grip on her blaster as she plotted various escape and fighting scenarios in her head. Luck always favored the prepared. One thing her people knew how to do was plan for battle.
Caillen had left her with two weapons, but he'd taken his backpack. She hated that. Over the last few days, she'd come to rely on it as much as he did. There was something weirdly comforting about its contents. No wonder he'd risked his life to go back for it.
I've gone insane.
Who would consider a backpack worth their life?
Besides Caillen.
And with every second that passed, she sensed more of her sanity slipping away. In fact, time stretched out to the point she had to get up and pace around the cramped, empty space. Odd how it hadn't bothered her to be here when Caillen had been unconscious. Even passed out, he had such a commanding presence that it'd soothed her and kept her patient.
Yeah, okay, I am losing it for real this time.
'Cause all she could focus on was how much she'd enjoyed using his body as a pillow at night and dragging her finger down the line of his whiskered jaw right before she went to sleep. He'd probably kill her if he realized she'd done that. But he'd been irresistible and it'd led her to thoughts that she shouldn't have about any male. Especially since she couldn't mate for at least a year.
That was if her mother didn't fully degrade her back to child status once she was home.
Don't think about it.
She continued to pace the small area as she waited. It seemed like years had come and gone before she heard a sound above.
Her heart stopped. Pulling out the blaster, she braced herself for a fight and aimed it to shoot whoever was about to pounce on her. The rusted lock turned with excruciating slowness as someone fumbled with it.
Finally, the door creaked open to show her Caillen. Unconcerned about the heart palpitations he'd given her, he lowered himself into their space. He ignored the fact she had a blaster aimed at his head, as if it were a normal occurrence for him, then shut the door tight.
Handing her a small bag as she holstered her weapon, he grinned. "You a cannibal?"
She scowled at his peculiar question. "Beg pardon?"
"Do. You. Eat. Humans?" he repeated, carefully enunciating each word.
"Not. That. I. Know. Of." She mimicked his staccato rhythm and dry tone.
"Didn't think so." He dropped his backpack in the corner, then took out a new light stick that he snapped and shook. He dropped it on the floor before he faced her. "Any idea how hard it is to score nonhuman meat in this place? Really, the League would have a shit fit to see the menu items on this rock."
She would have been amused, but for his new appearance. There was a cut above his eye and his clothes were even more rumpled than they'd been before he left.
Had he been in a fight? Surely not and yet...
"Are you bleeding?"
He scratched at his chin in the most adorable sheepish action she'd ever seen. "Flesh wound." Oh yeah, that tone was completely defensive.
"What happened?"
He let out a tired sigh. "Would you believe some psycho dumb ass tried to mug me? Me? At first, I thought it was the authorities with a lucky strike. Nah. Moron. He's having a worse day than we are."
"How so?"
"I switched IDs with him."
She was both horrified and amused by what he'd done. If they found the ID, they'd know they were here. "Are you out of your mind?"
"Yes. But it gets the Enforcers off our backs for a bit and hopefully our frenemy assassin won't have a brain either. They'll be chasing the mugger every time he tries to use it which will hopefully be a lot--and if he's good at eluding them, he could buy us a lot of time. And best of all, I picked his pocket and got a pretty good wad of cash from him. The idiot didn't even know what I did. What kind of thief can't feel his own wallet being lifted, I ask you? You know, it's time to just surrender the occupation when you suck that much." Laughing, he pulled a hot sandwich out of the bag and held it out toward her.
She could kiss him for his kindness. The delicious smell made her stomach cramp so hard that for a moment she thought she'd be sick. Forcing it down, she took the sandwich from him with a calmness she didn't feel and unwrapped it even though part of her wanted to start eating it, wrap and all.
"If I start biting on my fingers, don't stop me."
He gave her a knowing grin as he ate his own.
She bit into the sandwich and savored the sweet meat taste. Oh yeah, this was good and she was unbelievably grateful to him for bringing it back. "Thank you."
"No problem." He swallowed his bite before he spoke again. "By the way, just so you know, I'd normally be charging a fee for this service."
"What service?"
"Feeding you."
She didn't know why, but that offended her. "Excuse me?"
His dark eyes glowed with wicked warmth as he raked his gaze slowly over her body as if savoring every inch. For some reason she couldn't name, it made her stomach flutter. "Oh yeah, baby. A meal for a beautiful woman... at least a kiss for it. It's mandatory. But since I know how hungry you are, I'm letting it slide. Next time... it will cost you."
Her anger vanished under the weight of his gentle teasing.
"I don't know. If I were you, I'd hold out for something better."
His eyes widened. "Really?"
"Mmm... yeah, hell to freeze over."
He laughed good-naturedly before he returned to eating his sandwich. "There's more food in the bag and drinks. Just so you know. I got plenty to feed even my sister Kasen, and believe me, she eats like an overweight torna."
Now that was impressive. It was said a torna ate three times its two-hundred-pound body weight a day.
Desideria fell silent as she tried to eat in spite of her cramping stomach. She was starving, but at this point her body was so used to being hungry that it wanted to reject her offering. Never had she been more miserable.
It was several minutes before her body calmed down enough that she could focus on anything else. She glanced over at Caillen. He sat in the corner, on the cold ground without so much as a thought about it. The laces on his left boot were untied. He was such a beguiling combination of rogue and gentleman.
His sister had definitely raised him right.
And that thought led her to the memory of the woman in the vidframe she couldn't identify. She didn't even know why, but there was a bitter pain in her every time she thought about why he kept that woman's photo with the rest of his family and friends.
Before her brain could interfere with her mouth, she found the last question she wanted to ask falling out and breaking the silence. "Who's the woman in the last still when you turn on your frame?"
He froze midchew before he leveled a murderous glare at her. That menacing look actually sent a shiver over her body and aw the killer that resided inside him. For one nanosecond, she half expected him to leap at her throat. "You went through my stuff?"
"It was a long two days."
That only seemed to anger him more. "You went through my stuff
?"
She sighed irritably. "Are you going to keep repeating that question?"
His glare intensified and the venom in his voice was chilling. "I hate for anyone to search my things without my permission. It gets so far under my skin that it might as well be a DNA marker."
"Sorry," she said honestly. "I didn't realize it was such an issue for you."
He scoffed before he took a drink. "You grow up in a six-hundred-square-foot box and have three older nosy-ass sisters in your business all the time, claiming it's for your own good, then you'll see what a big deal privacy is. I cannot stress enough how much I hate the thought of my belongings being touched without my consent. By anyone but me."
Obviously they'd searched his things a lot and left him very bitter from it. "I said I'm sorry and I really am--I promise I won't do it again now that I know how much it bothers you. Now who is she? I figured out your sisters and your mother. But she doesn't seem to fit." The unknown woman was much taller than his sisters and even more beautiful than Shahara. He'd only had one photo of her standing near a rundown cargo ship Desideria had assumed was his. In spite of her cold eyes, the woman had looked angelic and so sweet that it'd sent a wave of unfounded jealousy through her.
Caillen didn't respond for a few minutes as he glared at the floor as if it, too, had offended him somehow. It was obvious he still had very strong and very ill feelings toward the woman--at least she hoped it was toward the woman and not her for her snooping. "Her name's Teratin."
He used the present tense which meant the woman was still alive--another thing that really annoyed her when it shouldn't. You can't kill her, Desi.
The peculiar thing was that she did want to hunt her down and at least punch her.
But she had no intention of letting Caillen know that. "That's a pretty name."
"Yeah well, lots of poisonous things have pretty names." There was no missing the venom that shot daggers toward her as he met her gaze. He hated that woman with a passion that was staggering.
That degree of animosity surprised her and in a part of her that would make her mother proud she was glad he hated her. "If you don't like her why do you keep a picture of her in your frame?"
The heat in his gaze was scorching. "To remind me not to trust anyone. Ever. That no matter what comes out of someone's mouth--no matter how much they say they'll never betray you--one tiny, insignificant thing can turn them against you forever."
Her heart clenched at the pain she heard beneath his angry tirade. Given the decentt's a prorable man he'd shown himself to be, she couldn't imagine someone hurting him.
Had he done something to deserve it?
"What'd she do to you?"
Caillen glanced away as old memories surged. Teratin had seemed like such a decent person when he'd met her. Unassuming, even sweet. Bashful just enough to be endearing, but not off-putting. Little had he known at the time that all of that was well-practiced affectation. Hell, she'd even been easy to talk to most days.
A snake hidden underneath a pretty cover. Damn him for being stupid enough to be deceived.
He felt the tic in his jaw as he took a drink of water and tried to squelch the need he still had to hunt the bitch down and kill her. "We were together casually for about three years."
She arched her right eyebrow northward in an expression that would have amused him if they weren't discussing the Great Evil. "Define casually."
Yeah, that was the crux of it. One word, many definitions. Too bad his perception of their relationship had been completely different than her psycho ass.
"We had sex a couple of times, dinner a few more and hung out from time to time whenever she was in town. I never sought her out. Not once. But she'd come see me for no particular reason. Said she just liked hanging out with me, and I felt sorry for her that she didn't have anyone else to be with--in retrospect I should have realized anyone who travels from one planet to another just to spend an afternoon with you is krikkin insane. But I like to give lunatics the benefit of the doubt and if I have one flaw in life it's that I too often take people at face value even when I should know better. I swear, one day I'm going to learn to be jaded with the loons and underdogs too." Something easier said than done. He knew to be jaded around takers and grifters. But he was a sucker for anyone with a sad story. Loners who had no one. People who weren't liked by others. Any underdog could take him.
Most were decent. But a handful...
They were nuts to a level that defied human understanding.
He tightened his grip on the bottle as he took another drink and rode hard herd on his temper. Gods help Teratin if he ever came across her again. Most likely, he'd kill her.
And he'd relish her death rattle.
Probably celebrate it too and that was what scared him the most.
"Let me reiterate, it was nothing serious. Or so I thought. One day I get this hostile voice mail from her because I forgot her birthday. Hell, I hadn't thought anything about it--you know, three years and I'd never wished her a happy birthday before. Didn't know three was the magic number and if I failed to acknowledge it on that particular year, Crazy Bitch would rain down hell's wrath on my head. At that time I was being slammed with a massive shitfest every which way I moved. My sister Tessa was being chased by loaners who'd already landed her in the hospital for her debt, Kasen was in the hospital with another round of stop-the-blood-disease-from-killing-her and Shahara was after a target and missing in action--I was terrified she was dead and that we'd find her body somewhere gruesome. One of my regular jobs had just dried up completely and another was pushing me to the wall with regulations and equipment requirements I was struggling to meet. Little preoccupied with family and work at the time which any normal, sane human being would have understood.
"Instead, she goes mental on me and the next thing I know the bitch has called the authorities in an attempt to get me and my sister Kasen arrested. She's contacted my business associates trying to ruin my reputation any which way she can. She even called my best friend and tried to get him to turn on me. Never have I seen anything like it. And for what? A fucking birthday wish? Hell, I don't even know when Kasen's birthday is and I was not only raised with her, I love her--anyone who knows me, knows this about me. Failure to acknowledge a birthday doesn't mean I don't love you. I believe in celebrating the life of the people you love every day--not just on one particular day. All it meant was that I was up to my neck in crap to deal with and the last thing I needed was one more pain in my ass. Little Miss Give-Me-Attention-Cause-I-Have-No-Real-Friends needs to be schooled on the fact that the universe doesn't revolve around her and when other people are barely hanging on by their fingernails, a real friend would have helped and not added to the stress."
Desideria let out an elongated breath as he finished his diatribe. Not that she blamed him. He was right. Any human who would hurt another and try to ruin them over something so petty was sorry beyond belief and she hated that he'd been forced to go through that. It made her want to hurt the woman for him.
Like Caillen, she didn't keep track of that sort of thing either.
But it left her with one question. "And you judge all women by her actions?"
He shook his head. "No. I judge all people by that. I've seen too many spaz out over absolutely nothing, not quite to her dangerous extent, but enough that it's taught me to be wary of everyone, especially when they're trying to play the victim role. And she's an extreme reminder that no matter how well you think you know someone, they can turn on you for the dumbest reasons imaginable. Male, female, whatever. I mean, shit. Happy Birthday, bitch. Didn't she have anyone else in her life that mattered? I mean really, my sisters and friends don't call me on mine and I'm good with that. Never have I held it against them. I wish my life was so pathetically uneventful that all I had to get torn up over was the fact that some casual friend didn't wish me a Happy Birthday. My own family forgets mine about half the time and none of my friends know when it is and never once have I doubted the
ir loyalty to me. What's the big deal?"
Desideria bit back a smile. Not because it was funny--it was actually very tragic--but because his over-the-top tirade was so out of character that it amused her to see this side of him.
He did indeed have a temper.
However, she didn't want to offend him, especially over something that had left a lasting scar and changed the way he dealt with people. It angered her that anyone would be so needlessly vicious.
"Obviously to her, it was a big deal. But I agree with you. She had no right to do that to you."
"No kidding and do you know to this day, and it's been over four years now since it happened, she's still taking swipes at me? Any chance she can get to try and damage my reputation or interfere with my business, she takes. I've never seen anything like it in my life, and believe me, I've seen some shit."
She was aghast. "Are you serious? Four years later?"
He held his hand up in indignation. "Right hand to the gods and I swear to you I did nothing to her at all. Nothing. I was never anything but nice to her no matter how weird she'd get around me and even while her supposed real friends criticized and mocked her behind her back. I guess I should have done what they did. Then she would have loved me forever."
Desideria actually believed that. He'd been nice to her and that after her mother had tried to harm him and she'd gotten him shot. "I'm so sorry, Caillen."
"Yeah, don't be. It is what it is. I just don't understand people who are cruel without justification. People who try to tear down someone over petty nothings." He leaned his head back as he reached for a small bag of food. There was something boyish in his manner. Something that belied the ferocity and power. The more she was around him, the less threatening he appeared.
Weird. Very weird. She knew he could kill her and yet, she liked being with him.
She licked her suddenly dry lips as a wave of desire ripped through her. "I admire that about you though. I think it's a great thing you can't understand that kind of cruelty."
Caillen paused as he realized what she was saying to him. The tender look she gave him made his heart speed up as a part of his anatomy jerked to life and wanted something a little more intimate than this chat. "You admire me?"