Chapter 29
Sieglinde leaned back against the embankment on the edge of the lake and rested her hands on her stomach. She closed her eyes and let out a long breath. It felt good to be in the shade breathing in the smell of grass and warm bark. She needed that moment out from under the weights on her to clear her mind.
Their metal resources had dwindled to nothing, meaning so too had their arrows and spears. They were ill-equipped to fight even if they had wanted to give the effort.
Sieglinde had been helping the others to build temporary houses closer to the water. As the day wore on, the sky cleared to an uninterrupted blue and the air stilled. It quickly became too hot to work. She welcomed the opportunity to ignore the weights upon her mind.
She could hear splashing in the water nearby as several of the others drank to refresh themselves. Oda had brought several children to the water to play and they were giggling. For that rare moment, she revelled in the sounds that belied their fate. For that moment, there were no threats. The world was perfect.
"What a good idea," Humbert said as he approached. "I think I will join you."
She cracked open one eye. He was bare chested and wet from splashing in the water with the others. He sat next to her and copied her in leaning against the embankment. She closed her eye again.
"You've found the perfect spot," he said.
She smiled.
"I went to the smithy and talked to Conrad this morning," he said.
Sieglinde groaned. "Can't we pretend our problems do not exist for one afternoon?"
"I know what you mean," he replied. "But it was good news. Are you sure you don't want to hear it?"
She turned her head and looked at him. "What is it?"
"He found some kind of stones in the marshy part of the lake," he said. "They look almost like milky crystals. Well, they sparkle like them anyway." He opened his hand and revealed that he had been holding a small bundle of cloth.
She took it and unwrapped it. A small triangular point with a rounded base was resting within the cloth. She turned the sharp point over in her hands. This strange stone was solid white and sparkled like the water in the sun. The edges were sharp enough that a delicate touch was needed even just to examine it.
"They would be perfect for arrowheads," Humbert said. "Except for the fact that they have no notches. But they are sharper than any blade Conrad has ever made. He says the bottom of the lake seems to be covered in them so we would likely run out of wood before we would run out of points."
"And are we going to run out of wood?"
"Enough for arrows? Not likely," he said. "We should be able to last quite some time. I'm thinking we might even be able to fight a little more forcefully when they show up again. If we don't have to ration the weapons as much, we have a better chance."
"I hope you're right," she said as she continued to stare at the point. It was strange how white it was and how easily it sparkled with even the slightest light touching it. It was so much like the wall that protected them.
The splashing had quieted. She turned and saw that most of the adults were now sitting in the shade of the manor, watching the children swim. She re-wrapped the point and set it down the grass next to her. Her mind refused to consider what this new find meant for them. For some reason, the sparkle of that stone had made her think of the past, of the founding of the village, and how things had happened since then.
After a deep breath, she asked, "Do you know that I was never meant to be a leader?"
"Don't say that. You're a great leader." He reached out and rubbed her arm to reinforce his words of encouragement.
"That's not what I mean," she said. "I'm not saying I can't lead. I'm saying I was never supposed to lead. I was born no different than any of the Goddess Maids we have now. I was no different than that girl who died. Then all of a sudden, one day in my lessons, it all made sense. The herbs, the weaving, the spells and rituals, every aspect of them worked. They all made sense to me. I could understand exactly how and why. It caught everyone by surprise but they were delighted.
"When Luitgard's parents died, she was too young to lead alone and too young to marry. So I was picked as her counterpart based on my skill. Even then, no one ever thought I would amount to anything. I was just supposed to be a helper. I was to make Luitgard's responsibilities manageable by taking on some of the tasks. Luitgard was always supposed to be here and so long as she was, I never had to make any decisions. Even disciplining the Goddess Maids often fell to her. At least, that is how it seemed as she never trusted me with the task.
"Then she left and the soldiers showed up. All of a sudden, everyone expected me to know what to do. Everyone expected me to have the miracle answer to sending those men away. The only one who knew I couldn't do it was Adalbern. He tried his best to help me but he had so little time. He didn't get a chance to teach me much of anything. When I saw his head, that was when I knew we would die no matter what choices I made. I felt like a child trying to stand between the people and the enemy.
"But here we sit, talking about weapons and tactics. Hardly a thing for a child to understand. Yet I have no fear of it anymore. Perhaps accepting that we will all die was what set me free as a leader. No matter how badly I fail, it has to be better than that, right?"
He squeezed her hand. Then, propping himself up on one elbow, he looked down at her. "You haven't failed yet," he said, "And I don't believe you will." He leaned over and pressed his lips gently to hers. "You are the Goddess that protects me," he said. "And despite my efforts, I am still here. We will defeat them."
She kissed him back. "Even if we don't," she said. "At least we will die together."