“Yep!” I said excitedly, and towed Kristen with me down the hall and into the room.
“You need two of them?” Kristen asked softly, but I didn’t respond. It was all I could do to keep from laughing.
“Just remove everything below the waist, and we’ll be back in a few minutes,” the same woman said once we were inside.
Once she shut the door, Kristen was looking at me and pointing. “Why are there two table thingies?”
“Because you’re doing this with me! I told you!”
“No I am not!”
“Kristen!” I complained.
“You are insane, Paisley! Eli won’t even care if you have your fucking briar patch or nothing at all.”
“Language,” I muttered as she continued.
“There is literally not one thing that could make this kind of experience worth it. There will be no difference for you either way.”
“How do you know? You’ve never done it before!” I reminded her.
“I don’t care. I don’t need to! I have enough of an imagination to know that it would be pointless.”
“Just do it with me this once—”
“No.”
“—and if I’m wrong, and there’s no difference, I’ll pay for a spa day for you.”
Kristen eyed me for a second. “Three spa days.”
“Two,” I negotiated.
After another few moments, Kristen grabbed at her jeans and started unbuttoning them. “I am going to enjoy those two days, and I’ll love them even more because you will have paid for them.”
I laughed as I stripped down as well. Once I had everything placed off to the side and was hopping up onto the table, I looked back at my friend. “If I’m right and there’s a difference after this, then you owe me.”
Kristen snorted. “This pain will be payment enough.” When she caught sight of my blank expression, she said, “Fine. What do you want, because I know you don’t like going to the spa.”
I thought for a moment, but nothing came to mind so I just shrugged. “Hundred dollars, and we’ll call it even.”
“That is so not even, you are getting the bad end of this, but deal!” After she was on her table, she pointed at me. “But you are only getting your money if there is a good difference from this.”
“Fine.”
Just then there was a short knock before the door slowly opened and the two women came back in. After they talked to us for a couple minutes, they had us lie back while they finished getting everything ready. And now that I was on a table with my legs spread in front of two strangers, I was regretting this. Why I never actually thought about the whole being-half-naked-in-front-of-strangers thing, I have no clue. My only thought had been that I’d wanted to do this so I wouldn’t be mortified when Eli touched me again. If it weren’t for forcing Kristen into this with me, I would have bailed.
“Oh my God! I’m sorry, I’ll never ask you to do this again!” I screamed a few minutes later.
“Mother fucking son of a bitch, you bastard!”
“Langu—”
“Don’t even think about language-ing me, you— Mother fuck!” Kristen yelled. “I hate you! I hate all of you in this roo— Oh my God!”
I was in so much pain while being completely amused by Kristen’s yelling that I started giggling uncontrollably through my random bursts of cries and screams.
“Are you laughing?” Kristen shrieked. “Are you kidding me? You—ah! Mother Russia!”
The lady waxing me kept tapping the inside of my thigh to get me to stop laughing, but there was no stopping it now. The pain seemed to only fuel it. “Did you just—ow! Oh my God, ow! Did you just say ‘Mother Russia’?”
“Shut up, Pay! I will never forgive yo— Son of a fuck!”
For fifteen minutes I laughed between my shocked cries of pain, and wasn’t sure which one was responsible for the tears rolling down my cheeks; and Kristen continued swearing at everyone while telling me that we would never be friends again after this. When we were done and dressed again, Kristen wouldn’t even look at me; she just kept mumbling that I owed her five spa days after what she’d had to endure.
“It burns,” I complained when we were back in my car.
“I feel like I can’t close my legs.”
I looked over and laughed when I found Kristen slumped down in the seat with her legs spread as far as the car would allow her. “Does yours burn?”
“Yes, Paisley! My vagina fucking burns!” She glared at me and snapped, “Don’t even think about it!”
I pulled out of the parking lot and headed toward Kristen’s house, but the entire time I wanted to hold my vaj like a little kid who needed to pee. “Maybe it won’t be so bad the next time?” I offered.
“There will not be a next time,” she said, appalled that I would even suggest it. “I will never again go along with any of your insane ideas. This one was the worst of all.”
My mouth curved up, and a short laugh bubbled up my throat. “I still can’t believe you yelled, ‘Mother Russia’ while we were in there.”
“Shut up,” Kristen mumbled, but her tone held a hint of humor. “I don’t even know where that came from.” When I pulled up in front of her house and didn’t turn the car off, she looked at me in confusion. “Aren’t you coming in?”
“I can’t, I really feel like I need to go ice myself. It burns so bad.”
Kristen laughed, but when she started moving out of the car, her laugh died and her face twisted in pain. “Ice sounds good.”
“Let me know what Jason thinks!” I called out before she shut the door.
She turned to look at me, and once again she looked like she was ready to kill me. “You are out of your damn mind if you think I’m letting him anywhere near this tonight,” she said as she pointed at her vaj. “See you on Friday, and I want more Eli details!”
I said my good-byes to her and waited until she was in her house before I put my car back into drive. My amused expression fell into a frown, and I cupped myself as if that would relieve the pain. “Ow,” I mumbled pathetically to myself. “You’re so stupid, Paisley.”
“THIS IS ALMOST too weird for me,” Kristen said two nights later, and I turned my head to look at her. She pointed back and forth between Eli and me. “Like, this will take forever to get used to.”
Eli laughed against my shoulder and placed another kiss there. Pointing at the glass that had just been set on the bar in front of us, he asked, “Did you want to down it? It’ll give me fair warning that you’re pissed.”
I made a face and moved his Guinness aside. “No thanks.”
“So are you dating now?” Kristen asked. “Are you official, is there a title . . . ?”
Glancing at Eli, I shrugged and looked back to my friend. “We’re just us,” I said at the same time Eli declared, “She’s mine.”
Kristen and Jason both smiled. “Yours. Got it. Very official then,” Kristen said with a wink.
Eli’s knees tightened against my hips, and I leaned back into his chest. Mine. He’d been calling me that all week, and I couldn’t get enough of it. Because we’d both been slammed with work, we’d only been able to see each other once this week—which wasn’t a lot for us even before all this began.
He’d let me know earlier that he was coming to my place after O’Malley’s tonight and wouldn’t be leaving until Monday morning. There’d been so much promise of what was to come, but instead of waiting in heated anticipation for tonight . . . I had been dreading it. I’d gone and pretty much ruined any chance of enjoying or experiencing those promises on Wednesday night with Kristen. I’d been dying to know if she was sharing my unpleasant experience, but was too afraid to ask because if she hadn’t, she would never let me live that night down.
I involuntarily crossed my legs together, and had to bite back a cry of unwe
lcome pain at the action. I sighed and wondered how I was ever going to get out of this weekend with Eli.
Kristen elbowed me and leaned in close. “So what did he think . . . ?” She raised an eyebrow and looked down, and I laughed awkwardly.
“I haven’t seen him until we showed up here, but I really don’t think he’ll have much of an opinion,” I grumbled lamely.
“Jason cared. I’m pretty sure Eli will too.”
My eyes widened. Even though I was experiencing the most awkward pain of my life, I loved knowing that after how skeptical Kristen had been, there had been a difference. “Better or worse?”
“Better.”
“Really?” I asked excitedly before remembering that it didn’t matter for Eli and me anyway. The reminder made me so uncomfortable I didn’t even want to tell Kristen that she owed me a hundred bucks.
“Oh yeah.”
Eli pulled me back and nuzzled against my neck. “What are you two whispering about?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Kristen challenged. I so did not want him to know.
“Actua—”
I stumbled back into the bar stool when Eli’s voice and body suddenly disappeared from behind me, and I turned at the same time Kristen gasped.
“Brett!” I screamed when he punched Eli in the face. “Brett, stop!”
Eli was lying on the ground, and Brett had a hand gripping the back of his shirt, his other was still in a fist as he cocked back his arm to hit him again. Eli’s hands moved quickly, one gripping Brett’s forearm that was holding on to his shirt, the other to grab his fist that was aiming for Eli’s face again.
Jason had run to pull Brett off, but stopped when Eli shoved Brett away and to the side.
Scrambling to his feet, Eli shoved his shoulder into Brett’s stomach when he charged him again, sending them both into the wall we were sitting by.
“Stop!” I screamed, but Eli was only holding him there.
“I suggest you stop before I do something I regret,” Eli warned.
“Why?” Brett growled. “After all these years, why now? You had her for years. Years, you bastard!” He tried moving out of Eli’s hold, but Eli didn’t budge. “Then I find her and she’s finally living apart from you, and you have to come and decide that you want her now? You had your chance!”
“You got your hit in, but you won’t be getting another.” Eli said calmly, but his tone was dark and threatening. “I deserved that, I know, and I’m sorry for what I put both of you through.”
Brett’s chest heaved as his eyes narrowed on Eli.
“But understand this, she always has, and always will, belong to me.”
Two security guards walked up behind Eli and he looked over his shoulder when they spoke. “Break it up or take it outside.”
“It’s over,” Eli said calmly, and pushed off Brett to come stand in front of me.
Reaching behind his back with one arm, he brushed my stomach with his fingers—as if to make sure I was still there and not leaving. I gripped his fingers with both my hands, but kept my eyes on Brett as he walked toward the doors of the bar. Just before he went through them, he turned to look at me—the pain and sadness apparent on his face. My chest ached, but even through the pain I still had no doubt I’d made the right decision. Watching him walk away and leaving him last week was nothing compared to walking away from Eli.
It was like trying to compare a tidal wave to a ripple in a pond—it couldn’t be done.
“Are you okay?” Eli asked. His palm slid across my cheek to hold my face in his hand.
Moving my eyes from the doorway to Eli’s blue stare, I balked. “Me? Of course I’m okay, are— You’re bleeding!” I reached for his face to wipe away the blood trickling out of the corner of his mouth, but he gripped my hands in his, stopping them.
“I’m fine. But, Paisley—”
“What even happened? You were there and then you weren’t. By the time I turned around you were on the floor, how many times did he hit you?”
Eli pressed his forehead to mine, and immediately his calm demeanor flooded my veins. “Once, only once. He pulled me off the bar stool and I hit the floor. But I’m not worried about me right now.”
“Of course you’re not.” I laughed shakily and rolled my eyes.
“That’s the first time you’ve seen him since . . . ?” he asked, the question trailing off, but I knew when he was talking about.
“Yeah.”
“Then I need to know if you’re okay. I need to know what you’re feeling right now, Paisley. After seeing him . . . after what just happened.”
My gaze darted to the door before looking back into his stormy blue eyes. “Honestly?”
“Always.”
“It hurt seeing him, but not as much as it would kill me to have you leave. I made the right choice, Eli. There’s no questioning that.” Pulling one of my hands free from his, I placed my hand over his jaw and brushed my thumb over the blood, wincing when his body jerked. “Sorry.”
“He can punch, I’ll give him that.”
He wiped at his lip as he straightened, and looked down at the blood on his hand before rolling his eyes. Grabbing one of the bar napkins, he cleaned it off and picked up his Guinness. I made a face as he downed half the pint.
“That’s disgusting.” He grimaced and slammed the glass back down.
“As I’ve been telling you for years!”
Eli smirked and wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me close as he bent down, and letting his lips fall onto mine. “The beer mixed with blood, Pay.”
“Ew.”
“Exactly.” He kissed me again, and I pushed against his chest.
“You taste like nasty beer now,” I whined.
“And you love it.”
“Lie. That is such a lie.”
He laughed and captured my mouth again, this time slowly teasing my tongue with his, and I melted into his arms and that kiss despite the Guinness aftertaste.
“Is it okay if I still don’t know how to feel about all this?” Kristen asked. “I’m happy, and weirded out, and feel like I’ve stepped into an alternate universe . . . so many conflicting emotions.”
Eli was smiling down at me when he pulled back, but he spoke to Kristen. “You have time to get used to it.” Working his jaw a few times, he reached for his glass again and drained his beer. “Ready to get out of here?”
Grabbing his keys out of his pocket, he handed them to me and my eyes widened. “You’re letting me drive your truck?” Not that I hadn’t before. But it was always only because I’d won a bet, and I’m pretty sure I knocked five years off Eli’s life every time I did.
“I don’t know . . . can you reach the pedals?”
My expression fell and I smacked his stomach. “Don’t be rude or I’ll take your keys and leave you here.”
He gripped my hips and pulled me closer. “It was an honest question. You’re munchkin-sized.”
“I am not a munchkin!”
Ignoring me, he lifted me into his arms and kissed me soundly. “Perfect pickup size.”
“I’m leaving you here,” I grumbled against his lips.
“I want to get out of here. I want to be alone with you, and I just got punched and chugged a pint all within the last five minutes. So, yes, I want you to drive.”
I frowned and gently trailed my fingers over his red jaw. “ ’Kay, let’s go, giant.”
He snorted. “Troll.”
“Take that back!” I demanded.
“The cute ones with the colorful hair that sticks straight up,” he backpedaled.
“That does not make it any better!”
“It makes you adorable,” he countered. He was still holding me, and turned so we could both see Kristen and Jason. “Later.”
“Bye,” they called out in unis
on, both smiling widely at us.
“Did you hear what he called me?” I asked as Eli began walking us away.
Eli kissed my forehead and squinted his eyes in concentration before smirking. “We could even give you the colorful hair and everything. Like I said, you’ll be adorable.”
People were whistling and shouting catcalls as Eli walked me out of the bar—if only they knew what was actually going on right now.
“Trolls are not adorable, you beast.”
“Does that make you Beauty?” he teased.
I growled unimpressively. “This is not the time for you to try to be sweet.”
“But you’re pint-sized, you are adorable.”
“And you look like Lurch.”
He laughed loudly before everything stopped at once. Eli stopped walking, there was no sound coming from him, and even though we were out near the ocean air, it suddenly felt thick with tension . . . and I knew it was all coming from the man holding me.
“Paisley,” he sneered my name, and my body froze. “Get back in the bar and stay with Kristen. Have Jason come out here.”
“What’s—”
Eli stopped my head from turning to look behind me as he let my body slide down his. “Please just go inside until I come get you.”
I was looking up at Eli, but he was staring directly past me—his blue eyes were dark and his body was vibrating.
“Who’s behind me?” I asked hesitantly.
“No one,” he answered. When I tried pulling away, he looked directly into my eyes. “Please, Pay.”
“Why can’t I look? What is it?”
He took a large breath in before releasing it through his nose; his eyes never once left mine. “You’ll see it later anyway, but right now I don’t know if he’s still here, and I will beat the shit out of him if I see him. And that is something I really don’t want you to see. So, please, just trust me that going inside would be best right now.”
Eli said he. At that moment, I could only think of one person who that might be. If what had gone on in the bar had barely fazed him, then I couldn’t begin to imagine what Eli was looking at that was having this kind of effect on him. “If you honestly think Brett had something to do with whatever is behind me, then I need to see it even if he is still here, which I doubt he is after what just happened in the bar.”