CHAPTER EIGHT
Acceptance is probably one of the hardest things for an individual to achieve for themselves, as to become fully accepting of who you are, you need to look deep within, and explore places in your memories and your soul that may be painful and difficult. For we are not perfect, each one of us has imperfections, which will remain part of us for the time we have on this Earth. It doesn’t mean that in some cases those parts of us can’t be modified and changed, but on the whole, in some form or another, we are who we are with talent, with disabilities, with differences, with personalities and with individuality. All of us though are special; we are born special. Young children are more open to the acceptance of others than at any other stage of a human’s development on their life path. Their souls are pure, like an empty book, which will be written on by family, society, life experience, friends, opportunities, sadness, happiness and difficulties. For all, the ability to accept is vital to be able to move forward on our life path.
The 21st century places a lot of expectations on us all, from body image, materialism, status and success, to name but a few. All these expectations place great strain in our human souls, as this limits the amount of freedom the soul has to grow. It has to struggle to meet its full potential and some of this is due to humans being worried and concerned about how others perceive them. It is one who does not need this acceptance who can be truly free to live their life to the full, whose soul can grow to its full potential.
The questions that I have asked myself many times are ‘How can we achieve acceptance of ourselves? How can I accept me?’ The need to be accepted by others, to gain affirmation from them that you are an ok person, can stem from many different life experiences and some can go back as far as childhood. For, when you look for acceptance you try to please, to act in a certain way, to look a certain way, behave in a certain way and, worst of all, if acceptance does not come after such effort, you can become introvert, angry, rebellious and this can lead to many negative aspects being brought into your life. You can continue to try and please everyone around you and forget who you are, or you can embrace you and become who you are truly meant to be.
What does it mean to be accepting of you? This will be individual to you, as only you know the areas of your life where you don’t either like yourself, like where you are, or like how you look and feel. Each one of these emotions will carry with it inner emotions that present as outward actions which may or may not attract people or situations into your life that may or may not be beneficial to you. So, let’s look at you – I can’t look directly at you, for I don’t know you, but I have developed enough insight to know that you are special. You are an amazing part of nature and you have great potential within you, if you believe in you. Sounds ridiculous, sounds condescending, sounds true, sounds possible or does it sound embarrassing? Emotions play an enormous part in the development of our inner life, our soul, but whatever you feel now, you need to begin to learn to believe in you: like who you are and feel your potential. For this is the first step on the road to the acceptance of the self and this can begin at any point in your life that you choose, as it is your choice.
Acceptance is an important part of our life, not only of ourselves but also that of others. It is freeing to know you; it gives you more control in your life and it enables you to open up to your full potential. I believe that it is not just individuals that need to learn acceptance and understand the impact of non-acceptance: the world as a whole would benefit from this very important attribute of human life. By beginning to accept who you are, you will be more able to love yourself and embrace life more fully. None of us are perfect; our lifetime here will teach us many things. If we listen, we will grow; if we ignore, we will wilt. Since I have been more accepting of me, there has been an inner peace growing inside my soul. The energy you used to be someone you are not can now be directed at you to support your travel down the road of life. Acceptance is freedom, it is peace, but, most of all, it supports you in becoming you and acceptance of others for who they are will support them in becoming them.
Accepting that we are all individuals and that we all have our own issues and faults that we deal with in our lives, can assist us in growing our compassion for each other. From this compassion will grow love and from this love will grow more understanding and from this will come forth the knowledge and the skills needed to support the human race in its future development. For we are all special, we are all amazing and we all have choices. Make your choice, the one where you grow your inner light and love for yourself. Take time for yourself and don’t be so hard on you when you don’t get it right because you will not be the only one that will fail at times; we all will. If anyone tells you any different, I believe that they are being dishonest with themselves. It is easy to condemn, it is easy to feel a failure, but accept that that is part of being human. You will only be a failure if you do not try to accept yourself; for this is where you will find the change you are searching for. Change provides growth and through growth comes the realisation of your true life and your full potential.
Take time once a day to look at you and say ‘I am ok, I like me and I will love me and cherish who I am’. Remember, this will not happen overnight: it can take years or a lifetime. So, don’t rush; don’t feel a failure if it doesn’t work as soon as you would want it to. Just know that acceptance will open a door for you to walk through and become you and not only will you benefit from this, those around you will begin to see your true potential and support you on the road to acceptance. The beauty of this is that you could also help them on the road to acceptance of themselves. If this builds across the world, then the collective consciousness will be raised to new heights, positively influencing the world in which we live now and for future generations to come.