My flight left in less than two hours.
And. She. Just. Kept. Talking.
“And then I was like, screw you, I—” Angelica waved her hands in the air, yacking up a storm, sucking up time that I’d never ever get again, and moving her head back and forth like she couldn’t decide which position was more comfortable to swallow me whole from.
Seriously. The chick made me feel extremely uncomfortable and I’d had some serious run ins with groupies.
“Look” — I held up my hands in front of me — “I know your manager wanted you to be seen with me for promo but, for real, I have to catch a plane.”
Angelica turned bright red.
Huh, so the devil did get occasionally embarrassed. Well I’ll be damned.
“But—”
“We can figure something out when I get back.” I clutched my carryon in my hand and ushered her towards the lobby, gritting my teeth the entire way as a few photographers took pictures of us.
I smiled. Because well — I had to.
And Angelica went into crazy mode.
She launched herself at me, kissed my cheek, wiped off the lipstick and then curved her body against mine. Pretty sure I hated my life at that moment. I smiled so bright my face hurt. It was totally fake. You’d have to be an idiot to believe that I was anything but pissed in that moment.
When did I start to get sick of the press? I used to eat it up. Freaking loved the attention but now, it felt like every single picture they took was like getting punched in the gut.
“So” — Angelica flipped me towards her — “I’ll see you when I get back.”
Yeah and I was going to freaking go into hiding to make sure that she didn’t follow through on that threat — yeah it was a threat not a promise.
I still had a few hours to make it to Portland, drive into Seaside and surprise my girl. I smiled at the thought, this time a real smile that I’m sure every single camera caught, and stepped into the waiting limo.
Angelica can go to hell for all I cared… I had Nat. What else did I need?
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Alec
WAITING FOR NAT to ascend the stairs was pure hell. I knew she’d look beautiful — in fact I knew she’d probably make me want to punch my brother in the face, the same brother who texted me this morning and said he was flying in to surprise her.
Yeah, we would get exactly no practice time for that little concert he had planned, but I knew we could pull it off.
I pulled at my black tie for the fiftieth time that night. My ears perked up when I heard footsteps coming down the hall.
“Wow!” Evan applauded while I tried to find words that would do Nat’s beauty justice. “You clean up well Nat.”
She rolled her eyes, and then set those same brown eyes in my direction, waiting for me to say something — anything. I wasn’t sure why my mouth wasn’t working. She was wearing a cute little cocktail dress that made her legs look so long I couldn’t stop staring. Her makeup was done to perfection. I mean, she was just so… pretty.
“Yes.” My voice was hoarse. I looked away licking my lips, gaining courage from the silence, and grabbed her hand. “Okay, you got everything you need? Because we needed to be there like ten minutes ago.”
Wow. So instead of compliments I just turn into a complete ass?
If Nat was hurt she didn’t show it.
We piled into the car.
She wasn’t smiling until she checked her phone. It was Demetri; it had to be.
She giggled then asked Evan to take a picture of her. I tried not to be jealous but that’s the thing with jealousy — once you let it in, it’s hard as hell to remove it completely from your body. It’s like it plants seeds in every part of your soul until you’re physically sick with it.
I’d basically allowed her to cheat on him, with me, and I was still flirting with the entire idea of screwing it all and just having her for myself.
I told myself I wouldn’t make any more moves — if he messed up, she was fair game, until then. I stole another glance at her glossy lips and curled hair. Damn it. I’d wait years for her. Because nobody was perfect, right? At one point he was going to mess up, and I would be there to pick up the pieces.
We pulled up to the parking lot and immediately went to the door to start our patrol for homecoming committee. The only problem? I was usually the event people stood in line to see, so when they saw me guarding the door they wanted to touch, they wanted to flirt. I had two girls, TWO, offer sex in the bathroom stall. Right, because that was every rock star’s fantasy. Sex in a high school bathroom? Really?
Finally, I couldn’t take it anymore. I felt like a piece of meat and the door was getting more crowded by the second. I usually stayed far away from people at school so it made sense that they would suddenly think my ass was fair game.
“Hey” — Nat gave me a sympathetic look and walked up to Alesha — “Can we switch?” At least then I’d have a table to separate me from the loads of people who wanted to cop a feel.
“Sure, I’m almost done anyway.” Alesha moved from the ticket table to the door and let us take our seats.
I thought tickets would be easy. You know, people hand you money, you stamp their hands, done. Except, my hands kept colliding with Nat’s making the parts of my brain that should be on counting money — on kissing her. And that wasn’t helping my situation at all. I clenched my jaw and thanked God when we sold the last ticket and were able to go into the dance. Luckily, Bob and Lloyd had agreed to help with security, which was good, all things considering. It wasn’t every day a high school had a free AD2 performance.
“Do you want to dance?” Nat asked shyly once we walked into the gym.
She looked so cute. I couldn’t turn her down. I grinned, and pulled her into my arms. Now dancing? I could do. I knew where my strengths were. I may have issues talking to her, I may have issues even touching her, but dancing was like music, I let it take me to another place.
Nat was having a hard time keeping up with me. Which I kind of loved, because it made her face all flustered and sexy.
She kept apologizing when she tripped on her feet. I rolled my eyes and laughed then pulled her flush against my body, rolling my hips against hers a bit to get her to follow the movement of the music. Instinct took over. She was a good dancer, as long as I led the way, and as long as I didn’t let her go.
Last year one of our popular songs was remixed into this crazy tango beat that had dance clubs all over going crazy. Fans posted Youtube videos of choreography to the song, and I knew Nat had to know it. So I started with the first move, she followed with the second, the crowds had parted and it was just me and her on the dance floor. I loved it. I’m sure Demetri was watching from backstage laughing his ass off — but for right now, it was just me and her… Dancing at Homecoming. Funny how things can feel normal but actually be the exact opposite.
The chorus hit, I lifted Nat into the air then placed her leg around my hips and twirled until she dipped below me, her hair falling to the floor in a wave, I twisted her back around until she was on the floor and then went into the Tango, which surprisingly, she knew.
Mouth dry, I watched as Nat moved to the ground skimming her heeled foot between my legs and then kicking to the right and left, before twisting and then standing.
Holy shit. That was hot. As in, my mouth was still open and I was ready to kiss her right then and there.
Once she faced me again, I turned her around, moving my arms slowly down her shoulders and then across her stomach as I lifted her into the air and grabbed her legs so she was clinging backwards to my body, I twirled around the dance floor. People started clapping, and I probably looked insane. I hadn’t danced like that in a long time.
The music died down. People clapped, and I put Nat back on wobbly feet “I think I may have a crush on this Alec,” she joked out of breath.
“This Alec?” I asked; sweat trickled down the side of my face.
“The one
who seduces girls on the dance floor and puts Justin Bieber to shame… hey, um, can I have your autograph?” She fluttered her eyelashes.
My mouth dropped open, I cursed, “You suck.” I hated it when she brought that guy up. Way ta kill the moment, Nat.
She winked.
And I lost it.
We both threw back our heads and laughed. The music switched to a slow song; she rested her head on my chest. I couldn’t help but sigh, and just enjoy the moment. Because I knew it would be over way too soon.
“Nat, I—”
The lights flickered. That was my cue.
I grinned. “I’ll be right back.”
I ran backstage and met up with Demetri. He was shaking his head at me, “Dude, did you have to show me up and go and dance like a freaking maniac?”
“Yup.” I nodded.
He was still laughing. I almost asked him if he was on drugs because old Demetri would have been pissed that I was flirting with his girlfriend, instead, he looked… overjoyed.
It grated my nerves.
Because it made me think that maybe — things were going to be great between them, and I’d gone and ruined the one thing that had kept a smile on his face for longer than six hours.
“Sorry about that, folks. The dancing will recommence after this special performance,” the principal announced loudly.
“You ready?” Demetri asked.
“Always.” I nodded. “Let’s do this.”
A surge of adrenaline rocked through me as I made my way onto the stage.
“It is my pleasure to announce, AD2!”
The stage went dark.
And then lit up like a Christmas tree. Demetri moved to the middle.
“Nat,” his voice rumbled in the microphone. “This one’s for you.”
I moved behind him with a guitar and stood in front of the microphone.
The tune Demetri had used to write the song was haunting, it started on sharp notes, slowly pulling the listener in with its eeriness.
“Torn Like Rain,” I said into the microphone staring directly at Nat.
Brown eyes, blond hair, I can’t help but stare. She’s got me hypnotized. I need her, like oxygen, I can’t explain the way she makes me feel inside. Like rain, washing my fears away, she makes me feel like I can say all those things I’m too scared to say.
Breathe in, breathe out, sometimes you just gotta shout your love. Shout your love. Inhale, exhale, the beauty of your love will always be enough. Enough.
Demetri sang the first verse and chorus. I was in charge of the bridge. My voice was different from his; it had a type of rasp to it where as Demetri sang so clear it was ridiculous. I didn’t realize I was still staring at Nat until her eyes flickered from me to Demetri. His body tensed next to me, as if he saw the raw expression of hunger on my face.
I could never hide my emotions when I sang. That would be like trying to put a shield over the sun, eventually it burns through, singing everything in its path.
Demetri belted the chorus with a desperation I’d never heard him use before. Almost as if he was willing it to be true, willing her to love him forever, willing her to be his and not something he had to share — something he had to give up.
When the song ended the entire room exploded into clapping. I trembled with each clap. How would I ever say goodbye to this life? To the rush music gave me? I couldn’t. And by the look on Demetri’s face he couldn’t either. We had to fix us — fix what was going on so we could do what we were born to do.
We walked together off stage.
“Don’t tell me.” Demetri’s voice was raspy. “I don’t want to know.”
“Know what?” I asked with a dread-filled voice.
“Or maybe I do,” he whispered. “Did you…” He swore. “Do you realize how much I hate having this conversation?”
“Demetri—”
“Did you sleep with her?” He sounded so calm, as if he didn’t just ask me if I slept with his girlfriend.
“No,” I whispered. “Besides, this is Nat we’re talking about. I could be the most famous person on the planet… and she’d still see you.”
“Yeah.” Demetri sighed. “I know she sees me, man. I just wish that when she looked, you weren’t the first one she looked at. Always number two, hmm?” He slapped me on the back, “I’m going to go dance with the prettiest girl in the room, see you later.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Demetri
THE HARDEST PART about loving someone? Not knowing if they love you in the same way. I mean how do you measure that type of thing? You can’t. I couldn’t measure it. All I knew was that every time I saw her, my heart leapt, it physically pushed against my chest. I mean, that wasn’t normal right? And then I would get all nervous and I don’t know, I just, I mean I just wanted to touch her. Was that weird? That I needed her touch so desperately that I’d forgo kissing, sex, anything just to have her skin pressed against mine? However brief it may be?
Nat was in the middle of the dance floor still staring at the stage.
“May I have this dance?” I whispered in her ear wrapping my arms around her body. Man that dress was beautiful. I wasn’t one of those guys that usually go super tongue tied, but damn, my tongue? Tied. So tied it was ridiculous.
Nat surprised me by turning around in my arms and throwing herself against my chest. “Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?”
“I wasn’t sure I could.” I held her, memorized her, and kissed her mouth softly. “I found out around noon that I could make it up here, but I’ve gotta fly back out in a few hours.”
“You flew here for me?” She gulped.
I laughed and nuzzled her neck. “I would do anything for you. Don’t you see that already?”
Immediately her eyes fluttered closed, and when she opened them, they weren’t on me, but across the room at my brother. Well, that was as much of an answer as anything. They didn’t’ sleep together, but did he kiss her? Did he touch her? Would I blame him even if he did? Because no matter what I did with Nat, no matter how much of my heart I gave her, it still wasn’t enough. Sucked, to know that I could give her my everything, and she’d still be starving for him — starving for Alec.
When she looked back at me, it wasn’t with love, but hate, rejection. Shit. I knew that look; I basically created that same look.
My heart sank.
I didn’t plan for it to happen.
To fall in love so fast and just assume she felt the same way.
Instead, she fell in like with me. And in love with my brother. Relationships were built on like, but love? With him in my life constantly? Eventually she would stray. I’d always look over my shoulder. I’d always wonder.
Was I selfish enough to push it? To push her until she broke?
She sighed heavily into my chest.
“Baby, what’s wrong?” I laughed and kissed her forehead, trying to get her to relax.
Nat shrugged. “I just miss you, that’s all.”
“I miss you, too.” I felt my body lighten up. Hope. There was still hope. Desire was evident in her eyes. My mouth descended, covering hers. Her kiss was so welcome, so open, so… inviting. That I had to wonder. Was she swaying? Was she finally realizing I would be everything for her?
Her tongue flicked mine, I groaned, my arms coming around her, and then I was lifting her off the floor, twirling her in circles, kissing her like my life depended on it.
“Can we go?” she asked when I pulled back.
“Are you sure?” I suddenly felt nervous. Why did we need to go? I mean she came with Alec. Not that I was against being alone with her, but being alone meant we’d be like… alone-alone.
“Yes.” She bit her lower lip.
I sighed, mainly because I knew that it could go either way. Nat could give in to me — once and for all. Or finally prove to me, that she wasn’t ever mine to begin with. But Alec’s all along.
“Your carriage awaits.” I tucked her arm in mine and led her out
side.
“You look hot tonight, Nat.” I gave her a seductive grin, one that hopefully made her realize that being alone with me probably wasn’t the best idea she’d ever had — not in my current mood. Not when I wanted to take her. For myself.
“Where are we going?”
“Where do you want to go?”
Nat shrugged. “I just want to be with you.”
My heart damn near leapt out of my chest and landed on the car — that’s how happy that one sentence made me. I squeezed her hand and drove up to the beach house. It was dark.
When we walked in, I flipped on a few lights and threw my keys onto the table then swept Nat into my arms and murmured. “I heard you slept in my bed?” I continued walking her backwards up the stairs until she was against my door. With a wink, I opened it and led her in.
“It’s possible.” She grinned.
“Did you wear my clothes too?” I teased.
“Yup.”
Damn, I groaned out loud. I didn’t think she’d actually say ‘yes’ and now all I could concentrate on was hunting down those same clothes and putting her back into them again. “Ah, you are killing me, girl.” My finger threaded through her hair. “You’re so damn beautiful, Nat. And you don’t even know it. You don’t see what everyone else sees. This beautiful, bright girl — you’re like the sun.”
“The sun?” she repeated.
“I want to revolve around you.” My voice shook. I’d never been so obsessed with a girl, so careless with the way I felt — she made me want to be careless.
I felt myself stumble a bit as I latched my mouth onto hers. Was I that much of a lightweight now? I’d had two shots before our performance. The first alcohol I’d had in weeks. Not that it was any of her business or Alec’s. I was in complete control.
Except… I kind of liked it too much.
And then there was that whole situation with Angelica stuffing something in my pocket when I left for the airport.