THE SIXTH STORY
[Day the Ninth]
TWO YOUNG GENTLEMEN LODGE THE NIGHT WITH AN INNKEEPER, WHEREOF ONE GOETH TO LIE WITH THE HOST'S DAUGHTER, WHILST HIS WIFE UNWITTINGLY COUCHETH WITH THE OTHER; AFTER WHICH HE WHO LAY WITH THE GIRL GETTETH HIM TO BED WITH HER FATHER AND TELLETH HIM ALL, THINKING TO BESPEAK HIS COMRADE. THEREWITHAL THEY COME TO WORDS, BUT THE WIFE, PERCEIVING HER MISTAKE, ENTERETH HER DAUGHTER'S BED AND THENCE WITH CERTAIN WORDS APPEASETH EVERYTHING
Calandrino, who had otherwhiles afforded the company matter forlaughter, made them laugh this time also, and whenas the ladies hadleft devising of his fashions, the queen bade Pamfilo tell, whereuponquoth he, "Laudable ladies, the name of Niccolosa, Calandrino'smistress, hath brought me back to mind a story of another Niccolosa,which it pleaseth me to tell you, for that therein you shall see how agoodwife's ready wit did away a great scandal.
In the plain of Mugnone there was not long since a good man who gavewayfarers to eat and drink for their money, and although he was poorand had but a small house, he bytimes at a pinch gave, not every one,but sundry acquaintances, a night's lodging. He had a wife, a veryhandsome woman, by whom he had two children, whereof one was a finebuxom lass of some fifteen or sixteen years of age, who was not yetmarried, and the other a little child, not yet a year old, whom hismother herself suckled. Now a young gentleman of our city, a sprightlyand pleasant youth, who was often in those parts, had cast his eyes onthe girl and loved her ardently; and she, who gloried greatly in beingbeloved of a youth of his quality, whilst studying with pleasingfashions to maintain him in her love, became no less enamoured of him,and more than once, by mutual accord, this their love had had thedesired effect, but that Pinuccio (for such was the young man's name)feared to bring reproach upon his mistress and himself. However, hisardour waxing from day to day, he could no longer master his desire toforegather with her and bethought himself to find a means ofharbouring with her father, doubting not, from his acquaintance withthe ordinance of the latter's house, but he might in that eventcontrive to pass the night in her company, without any being thewiser; and no sooner had he conceived this design than he proceededwithout delay to carry it into execution.
Accordingly, in company with a trusty friend of his called Adriano,who knew his love, he late one evening hired a couple of hackneys andset thereon two pairs of saddle-bags, filled belike with straw, withwhich they set out from Florence and fetching a compass, rode tillthey came overagainst the plain of Mugnone, it being by this night;then, turning about, as they were on their way back from Romagna, theymade for the good man's house and knocked at the door. The host, beingvery familiar with both of them, promptly opened the door and Pinucciosaid to him, 'Look you, thou must needs harbour us this night. Wethought to reach Florence before dark, but have not availed to makesuch haste but that we find ourselves here, as thou seest at thishour.' 'Pinuccio,' answered the host, 'thou well knowest how littlecommodity I have to lodge such men as you are; however, since thenight hath e'en overtaken you here and there is no time for you to gootherwhere, I will gladly harbour you as I may.' The two young menaccordingly alighted and entered the inn, where they first eased[434]their hackneys and after supper with the host, having taken good careto bring provision with them.
[Footnote 434: _Adagiarono_, _i.e._ unsaddled and stabled and fedthem.]
Now the good man had but one very small bedchamber, wherein were threepallet-beds set as best he knew, two at one end of the room and thethird overagainst them at the other end; nor for all that was there somuch space left that one could go there otherwise than straitly. Theleast ill of the three the host let make ready for the two friends andput them to lie there; then, after a while neither of the gentlemenbeing asleep, though both made a show thereof, he caused his daughterbetake herself to bed in one of the two others and lay down himselfin the third, with his wife, who set by the bedside the cradle whereinshe had her little son. Things being ordered after this fashion andPinuccio having seen everything, after a while, himseeming that everyone was asleep, he arose softly and going to the bed where slept thegirl beloved of him, laid himself beside the latter, by whom, for allshe did it timorously, he was joyfully received, and with her heproceeded to take of that pleasure which both most desired. WhilstPinuccio abode thus with his mistress, it chanced that a cat causedcertain things fall, which the good wife, awaking, heard; whereupon,fearing lest it were otherwhat, she arose, as she was, in the dark andbetook herself whereas she had heard the noise.
Meanwhile, Adriano, without intent aforethought, arose by chance forsome natural occasion and going to despatch this, came upon thecradle, whereas it had been set by the good wife, and unable to passwithout moving it, took it up and set it down beside his own bed;then, having accomplished that for which he had arisen, he returnedand betook himself to bed again, without recking of the cradle. Thegood wife, having searched and found the thing which had fallen wasnot what she thought, never troubled herself to kindle a light, to seeit, but, chiding the cat, returned to the chamber and groped her wayto the bed where her husband lay. Finding the cradle not there, 'Mercyo' me!' quoth she in herself. 'See what I was about to do! As I am aChristian, I had well nigh gone straight to our guest's bed.' Then,going a little farther and finding the cradle, she entered the bedwhereby it stood and laid herself down beside Adriano, thinking tocouch with her husband. Adriano, who was not yet asleep, feeling this,received her well and joyously and laying her aboard in a trice,clapped on all sail, to the no small contentment of the lady.
Meanwhile, Pinuccio, fearing lest sleep should surprise him with hislass and having taken of her his fill of pleasure, arose from her, toreturn to his own bed, to sleep, and finding the cradle in his way,took the adjoining bed for that of his host; wherefore, going a littlefarther, he lay down with the latter, who awoke at his coming.Pinuccio, deeming himself beside Adriano, said, 'I tell thee therenever was so sweet a creature as is Niccolosa. Cock's body, I have hadwith her the rarest sport ever man had with woman, more by token thatI have gone upwards of six times into the country, since I left thee.'The host, hearing this talk and being not overwell pleased therewith,said first in himself, 'What a devil doth this fellow here?' Then,more angered than well-advised, 'Pinuccio,' quoth he, 'this hath beena great piece of villainy of thine, and I know not why thou shouldsthave used me thus; but, by the body of God, I will pay thee for it!!'Pinuccio, who was not the wisest lad in the world, seeing his mistake,addressed not himself to mend it as best he might, but said, 'Of whatwilt thou pay me? What canst thou do to me?' Therewithal the hostess,who thought herself with her husband, said to Adriano, 'Good lack,hark to our guests how they are at I know not what words together!'Quoth Adriano, laughing, 'Leave them do, God land them in an illyear! They drank overmuch yesternight.'
The good wife, herseeming she had heard her husband scold and hearingAdriano speak, incontinent perceived where and with whom she had been;whereupon, like a wise woman as she was, she arose forthright, withoutsaying a word, and taking her little son's cradle, carried it at aguess, for that there was no jot of light to be seen in the chamber,to the side of the bed where her daughter slept and lay down with thelatter; then, as if she had been aroused by her husband's clamour, shecalled him and enquired what was to do between himself and Pinuccio.He answered, 'Hearest thou not what he saith he hath done this nightunto Niccolosa?' 'Marry,' quoth she, 'he lieth in his throat, for hewas never abed with Niccolosa, seeing that I have lain here all night;more by token that I have not been able to sleep a wink; and thou artan ass to believe him. You men drink so much of an evening that you donothing but dream all night and fare hither and thither, withoutknowing it, and fancy you do wonders. 'Tis a thousand pities you don'tbreak your necks. But what doth Pinuccio yonder? Why bideth he not inhis own bed?' Adriano, on his part, seeing how adroitly the good wifewent about to cover her own shame and that of her daughter, chimed inwith, 'Pinuccio, I have told thee an hundred times not to go abroad,for that this thy trick of ari
sing in thy sleep and telling for truethe extravagances thou dreamest will bring thee into trouble some dayor other. Come back here, God give thee an ill night!'
The host, hearing what his wife and Adriano said, began to believe ingood earnest that Pinuccio was dreaming; and accordingly, taking himby the shoulders, he fell to shaking and calling him, saying,'Pinuccio, awake; return to thine own bed.' Pinuccio havingapprehended all that had been said began to wander off into otherextravagances, after the fashion of a man a-dream; whereat the hostset up the heartiest laughter in the world. At last, he made believeto awake for stress of shaking, and calling to Adriano, said, 'Is italready day, that thou callest me?' 'Ay,' answered the other, 'comehither.' Accordingly, Pinuccio, dissembling and making a show of beingsleepy-eyed, arose at last from beside the host and went back to bedwith Adriano. The day come and they being risen, the host fell tolaughing and mocking at Pinuccio and his dreams; and so they passedfrom one jest to another, till the young men, having saddled theirrounceys and strapped on their valises and drunken with the host,remounted to horse and rode away to Florence, no less content with themanner in which the thing had betided than with the effect itselfthereof. Thereafter Pinuccio found other means of foregathering withNiccolosa, who vowed to her mother that he had certainly dreamt thething; wherefore the goodwife, remembering her of Adriano'sembracements, inwardly avouched herself alone to have waked."