costs me a great deal more.'
'Then, madam,' says she, 'if the child should not live, or should bedead-born, as you know sometimes happens, then there is the minister'sarticle saved; and if you have no friends to come to you, you may savethe expense of a supper; so that take those articles out, madam,' saysshe, 'your lying in will not cost you above #5, 3s. in all more thanyour ordinary charge of living.'
This was the most reasonable thing that I ever heard of; so I smiled,and told her I would come and be her customer; but I told her also,that as I had two months and more to do, I might perhaps be obliged tostay longer with her than three months, and desired to know if shewould not be obliged to remove me before it was proper. No, she said;her house was large, and besides, she never put anybody to remove, thathad lain in, till they were willing to go; and if she had more ladiesoffered, she was not so ill-beloved among her neighbours but she couldprovide accommodations for twenty, if there was occasion.
I found she was an eminent lady in her way; and, in short, I agreed toput myself into her hands, and promised her. She then talked of otherthings, looked about into my accommodations where I was, found faultwith my wanting attendance and conveniences, and that I should not beused so at her house. I told her I was shy of speaking, for the womanof the house looked stranger, or at least I thought so, since I hadbeen ill, because I was with child; and I was afraid she would put someaffront or other upon me, supposing that I had been able to give but aslight account of myself.
'Oh dear,' said she, 'her ladyship is no stranger to these things; shehas tried to entertain ladies in your condition several times, but shecould not secure the parish; and besides, she is not such a nice ladyas you take her to be; however, since you are a-going, you shall notmeddle with her, but I'll see you are a little better looked afterwhile you are here than I think you are, and it shall not cost you themore neither.'
I did not understand her at all; however, I thanked her, and so weparted. The next morning she sent me a chicken roasted and hot, and apint bottle of sherry, and ordered the maid to tell me that she was towait on me every day as long as I stayed there.
This was surprisingly good and kind, and I accepted it very willingly.At night she sent to me again, to know if I wanted anything, and how Idid, and to order the maid to come to her in the morning with mydinner. The maid had orders to make me some chocolate in the morningbefore she came away, and did so, and at noon she brought me thesweetbread of a breast of veal, whole, and a dish of soup for mydinner; and after this manner she nursed me up at a distance, so that Iwas mightily well pleased, and quickly well, for indeed my dejectionsbefore were the principal part of my illness.
I expected, as is usually the case among such people, that the servantshe sent me would have been some imprudent brazen wench of Drury Lanebreeding, and I was very uneasy at having her with me upon thataccount; so I would not let her lie in that house the first night byany means, but had my eyes about me as narrowly as if she had been apublic thief.
My gentlewoman guessed presently what was the matter, and sent her backwith a short note, that I might depend upon the honesty of her maid;that she would be answerable for her upon all accounts; and that shetook no servants into her house without very good security for theirfidelity. I was then perfectly easy; and indeed the maid's behaviourspoke for itself, for a modester, quieter, soberer girl never came intoanybody's family, and I found her so afterwards.
As soon as I was well enough to go abroad, I went with the maid to seethe house, and to see the apartment I was to have; and everything wasso handsome and so clean and well, that, in short, I had nothing tosay, but was wonderfully pleased and satisfied with what I had metwith, which, considering the melancholy circumstances I was in, was farbeyond what I looked for.
It might be expected that I should give some account of the nature ofthe wicked practices of this woman, in whose hands I was now fallen;but it would be too much encouragement to the vice, to let the worldsee what easy measures were here taken to rid the women's unwelcomeburthen of a child clandestinely gotten. This grave matron had severalsorts of practice, and this was one particular, that if a child wasborn, though not in her house (for she had occasion to be called tomany private labours), she had people at hand, who for a piece of moneywould take the child off their hands, and off from the hands of theparish too; and those children, as she said, were honestly provided forand taken care of. What should become of them all, considering somany, as by her account she was concerned with, I cannot conceive.
I had many times discourses upon that subject with her; but she wasfull of this argument, that she save the life of many an innocent lamb,as she called them, which would otherwise perhaps have been murdered;and of many women who, made desperate by the misfortune, wouldotherwise be tempted to destroy their children, and bring themselves tothe gallows. I granted her that this was true, and a very commendablething, provided the poor children fell into good hands afterwards, andwere not abused, starved, and neglected by the nurses that bred themup. She answered, that she always took care of that, and had no nursesin her business but what were very good, honest people, and such asmight be depended upon.
I could say nothing to the contrary, and so was obliged to say, 'Madam,I do not question you do your part honestly, but what those people doafterwards is the main question'; and she stopped my mouth again withsaying that she took the utmost care about it.
The only thing I found in all her conversation on these subjects thatgave me any distaste, was, that one time in discouraging about my beingfar gone with child, and the time I expected to come, she saidsomething that looked as if she could help me off with my burthensooner, if I was willing; or, in English, that she could give mesomething to make me miscarry, if I had a desire to put an end to mytroubles that way; but I soon let her see that I abhorred the thoughtsof it; and, to do her justice, she put it off so cleverly, that I couldnot say she really intended it, or whether she only mentioned thepractice as a horrible thing; for she couched her words so well, andtook my meaning so quickly, that she gave her negative before I couldexplain myself.
To bring this part into as narrow a compass as possible, I quitted mylodging at St. Jones's and went to my new governess, for so they calledher in the house, and there I was indeed treated with so much courtesy,so carefully looked to, so handsomely provided, and everything so well,that I was surprised at it, and could not at first see what advantagemy governess made of it; but I found afterwards that she professed tomake no profit of lodgers' diet, nor indeed could she get much by it,but that her profit lay in the other articles of her management, andshe made enough that way, I assure you; for 'tis scarce credible whatpractice she had, as well abroad as at home, and yet all upon theprivate account, or, in plain English, the whoring account.
While I was in her house, which was near four months, she had no lessthan twelve ladies of pleasure brought to bed within the doors, and Ithink she had two-and-thirty, or thereabouts, under her conduct withoutdoors, whereof one, as nice as she was with me, was lodged with my oldlandlady at St. Jones's.
This was a strange testimony of the growing vice of the age, and such aone, that as bad as I had been myself, it shocked my very senses. Ibegan to nauseate the place I was in and, about all, the wickedpractice; and yet I must say that I never saw, or do I believe therewas to be seen, the least indecency in the house the whole time I wasthere.
Not a man was ever seen to come upstairs, except to visit the lying-inladies within their month, nor then without the old lady with them, whomade it a piece of honour of her management that no man should touch awoman, no, not his own wife, within the month; nor would she permit anyman to lie in the house upon any pretence whatever, no, not though shewas sure it was with his own wife; and her general saying for it was,that she cared not how many children were born in her house, but shewould have none got there if she could help it.
It might perhaps be carried further than was needful, but it was anerror of the right hand if it was an error, for by thi
s she kept up thereputation, such as it was, of her business, and obtained thischaracter, that though she did take care of the women when they weredebauched, yet she was not instrumental to their being debauched atall; and yet it was a wicked trade she drove too.
While I was there, and before I was brought to bed, I received a letterfrom my trustee at the bank, full of kind, obliging things, andearnestly pressing me to return to London. It was near a fortnight oldwhen it came to me, because it had been first sent into Lancashire, andthen returned to me. He concludes with telling me that he had obtaineda decree, I think he called it, against his wife, and that he would beready to make good his engagement to me, if I would accept of him,adding a great many protestations of kindness and affection, such as hewould have been far from offering if he had known the circumstances Ihad been in, and which as it was I had been very far from deserving.
I returned an